A/N: AH, I'M SO SORRY THIS IS LATE! I thought I'd already updated it, but when I checked today I realized that I hadn't! Gomen! Anyway, this chapter is a little different from the previous ones. I want to warn you all now that there will be some "sweet" moments between Tamaki and Crona, but this fic is in NO WAY intended to be a TamakiXCrona pairing. There is not meant to be any yaoi at all in this fanfic, just some very close friendships. Enjoy the chapter!
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story.
Chapter 9
When Crona returned home two hours later, Medusa and Lust were nowhere to be found. He reasoned that they must have gone back to the main mansion, so he got ready for bed and started to worry if he really would be able to show Medusa that he could do alchemy the next day; for all he knew, it could have just been some weird fluke when he'd tried it at Tamaki's house, and he actually couldn't do alchemy at all.
He tried to push these worries out of his mind the next day when he went to ask Ed and Al if they could show him how to write a transmutation circle. The day was so hectic that Crona didn't get a chance to ask the brothers about this until they were all once again seated in Tamaki's limo on the way to the Host King's house.
Ed and Al told Crona that they would be happy to show him how to write a transmutation circle. However, much to Crona's dismay, they had to go out to town for a little while- though they wouldn't tell him why-, and Crona would have to wait for them to come back to Tamaki's house. When they promised that they would be back after a few hours, Crona reluctantly agreed to wait at Tamaki's house and waved goodbye when Ed and Al stepped out of the limo at the entrance to the town square.
Thus, Crona was left with Tamaki for the next few hours. This made Crona nervous; he recalled the weird feelings he got around Tamaki, about wanting to spill his heart out, and was afraid that he might accidentally reveal something to the blonde that he shouldn't. He wanted to go to his temporary home and wait for Ed and Al to come back, but Ragnarok convinced him that there was no point in this, so before Crona knew it he was once again exiting the limo at Suoh Mansion Number 2.
"I'm so glad you could come over again, Crona!" Tamaki said enthusiastically as he led the pink-haired boy up the stairs towards his room. "Now I can finally give you that tour of my house that we never got around to yesterday!"
"Um, yeah, right," Crona said absently, already wondering when Ed and Al would be back. Tamaki led him into a large room with a king-sized bed, a large closet, lots of furniture, and a beautiful, bay window that had an amazing view of the gardens surrounding the mansion. Crona stared out the window in wonder, transfixed by all of the vibrant colors of the flowers.
"Oh, Crona?" Tamaki said, bringing the boy's attention back to him. "I have to go tell the servants something, but I'll be back in a few minutes. Will you be okay on your own for a little bit?"
"Oh, yes, I'll be fine," Crona said, and Tamaki smiled.
"Okay then! Feel free to have a look around; I don't mind! Be back in a bit!"
And with that he bounded out of the room, leaving Crona all alone.
As Crona gazed around the room, he noticed a picture on the dresser by Tamaki's bed. Curious, he picked it up and examined it. It was a woman with long, wavy blonde hair and soft blue eyes. She was very beautiful, and on closer inspection Crona realized that she resembled Tamaki quite a lot.
Just then, Crona heard footsteps running up the stairs, and said boy came jogging back into the room.
"Sorry about that," he apologized, smiling. He walked over and saw what Crona was holding. "Oh, so you found that, huh?"
"Who is she?" Crona asked. "She looks so much like you . . ."
"That's my maman, my mother," Tamaki replied, and Crona glanced at him. Though he was still smiling, Crona could detect a hint of sadness in the blonde's eyes.
"Did . . . did something happen to her?" Crona asked tentatively, afraid he was going to accidentally upset him. Tamaki gazed at the picture and shook his head ever so slightly.
"No, I . . . She lives in France, so I don't get to see her very often," Tamaki told him. He cleared his throat and Crona could swear he saw Tamaki's eyes starting to water a little bit.
"Do you miss her?" Crona questioned. There seemed to be more to the story than Tamaki was telling him, but he didn't want to press too much for information. Tamaki let out a slight, almost sad chuckle and nodded.
"Yes, I do miss her. Very much." After a few more seconds of staring at the picture longingly, Tamaki blinked and looked at Crona, grinning again. "But it's okay, because I love her with all my heart and I know she loves me just the same, so no matter how far apart we are we'll always be connected by our hearts!"
As Crona stared into Tamaki's eyes, filled with obvious adoration for his mother, that feeling of spilling his heart out started to overtake him again. However, this time it was slightly different; instead of wanting to tell Tamaki absolutely everything, Crona could only seem to focus on Medusa, and how little she cared for him as opposed to how much Tamaki's mother must care for her son if they had such a strong bond between them.
To Crona's great surprise, as these thoughts ran through his head, he started to feel a dampness in the corners of his eyes.
"Crona, what's wrong?" Tamaki asked, getting concerned when the boy started to tear up. He'd never shown this much emotion before, so Tamaki wondered if he had done something to set him off. "Did talking about my mother upset you?"
Tamaki gently gripped Crona's shoulders and Crona stared at him, the tears threatening to fall.
"You love your mother so much," Crona said, and Tamaki frowned, wondering what he was trying to get at. "And I'm sure she loves you just the same. My mother . . . no matter how hard I try, I just . . . I can never make her love me!"
Ah, so the truth finally comes out, Tamaki thought as Crona's resistance finally crumbled and he broke down. The tears streamed down his face and he gripped his arm tightly, dropping the picture of Tamaki's mother. Tamaki caught it before it hit the floor and then turned back to Crona, who had started to talk through his sobs.
"She . . . s-she wants me to do s-so much, and I . . . I try hard, b-but . . . I can never do a-anything right!" he blubbered. "N-no matter what I do, she's never shown me any l-love! I . . . I can't deal with it anymore!"
"Aw, come on now, I'm sure deep down she loves you a lot, even if she doesn't show it," Tamaki tried to reassure him, but Crona shook his head vehemently.
"No, she doesn't! N-no matter how hard I try . . . I-I'm always being punished!"
"But I'm sure-"
"You don't know what I've been through!" Crona suddenly yelled, startling Tamaki. He looked more tortured than Tamaki had ever seen him before, which greatly unnerved the blonde.
"All the things she's put me though . . . all the pain I've had to endure . . . and all the times I've had to deal with him . . . you just don't know," Crona finished in a whisper. Tamaki merely stared at him, his mouth open slightly.
"Crona, I . . .," Tamaki tried to console him, but for once he was at a complete loss of what to say. There was a darker side to Crona that he'd known nothing about, and it pained Tamaki to see the shy boy hurting so badly.
Slowly, so as not to startle the still-sniffling boy, Tamaki took a step forward and wrapped his arms around Crona's shoulders, hugging him tightly.
Crona let out a gasp of surprise and immediately started to struggle in Tamaki's grip, but after a moment his eyes refilled with tears and he buried his face in Tamaki's chest, sobbing as Tamaki whispered comforting words in his ear.
"There, it's alright; let it all out. You're going to be fine. Everything's going to be okay. Oh, vous enfant pauvres et torturé* . . . If I'd have known what you've been going though earlier, I would've helped you sooner . . ."
Tamaki waited a moment for Crona to calm down some and then released him from the hug. He gripped Crona's shoulders and stared into the boy's face.
"Crona, look at me," he said, and Crona gazed at him, still crying slightly. "Listen to me: no matter what you've gone through in the past, or what you're going through now, I want you to know that I'll be there for you no matter what from here on out."
Crona gaped at him, not believing what the blonde was saying; nobody had ever cared about him before, so why should Tamaki, the Host King, of all people?
"But, I-I've only known you for about a week!" Crona pointed out, trying to make Tamaki see how illogical he sounded. Tamaki shook his head.
"It doesn't matter," he said firmly, squeezing Crona's shoulders. "As a member of the Host Club, and because of my own beliefs, I strive to help others in need whenever I can. And right now, I think you need my help more than anyone else."
"But . . . but why?"
"Because you're my friend, mon ami." Tamaki smiled. "Aren't you?"
"Well . . . yes, I-I guess so . . .," Crona admitted. However, he was still having a hard time processing what Tamaki was saying. "But . . . no one's ever been friendly to me before . . . I scare everyone away, so no one likes me . . ."
"That's not true!" Tamaki said, surprised. "I don't think you're scary at all, and I like you a lot!"
"But . . . I'm so strange; no one understands me . . . there's things about me that if you knew about, you'd run away screaming." Crona's forlorn eyes were haunted, but Tamaki paid no attention to them.
"No, I wouldn't." Tamaki took Crona's hands in his and gazed firmly into the shy boy's eyes. "Everyone has something they don't want people to know about. But just because you don't want people to know about it doesn't make it scary or weird or anything."
"But-"
"Crona listen to me. No matter what secret you have that you don't want to tell me, I'll always be there for you. You are a dear friend to me, and I always take care of my friends. If there's one thing in your life you can be sure of, it's that fact."
After a few seconds of Crona continuing to stare at him blankly, Tamaki once again gripped Crona in a hug. However, much to Tamaki's delight, this time the blonde met no resistance.
"Y-you . . . you really care about me?" Crona said, squeezing his eyes shut to hold back the tears that were once again starting to cloud his vision. Only this time, they weren't tears of sadness.
"Yes, I do," Tamaki said into Crona's shoulder. "Even if no one ever has before, I want you to know that I do care about you, Crona."
He released Crona from the hug, gripped his shoulders again, and smiled, his eyes full of sincerity, and Crona felt the corners of his mouth being tugged upwards as well.
"Now, about your mother . . .," Tamaki started to say, but he instantly regretted it; as soon as he'd mentioned Crona's mother, the ghost of a grin that had been threatening to light up the shy boy's face had instantly vanished. Tamaki mentally berated himself for not giving Crona a chance to show his true smile.
Crona gulped and looked at the floor. He started to shake when he realized what he'd just done; he'd just revealed how he truly felt about Lady Medusa. Not only that, he'd also come dangerously close to telling Tamaki about Ragnarok, which would certainly not have been a good thing.
"Crona, it's alright," Tamaki said, squeezing the boy's shoulder again. He frowned. "Is your mother really that horrible?"
"Oh, no! She's not horrible at all, um . . .," Crona sputtered, frantically trying to cover up what he'd just said. Tamaki's expression hardened.
"You don't have to cover up for her; if she's done anything to you, anything at all, please tell me. I can get you out of there and into a much better environment to live in- my dad has connections that can help us with this."
"Y-you're dad?" Crona squeaked, remembering that Tamaki's father was currently being controlled by Medusa. "No, please don't tell him! I . . . I'll be okay, really!"
"If you're this scared of what's going to happen, I don't think you're going to be okay without some help," Tamaki told him. "I don't mean to offend you, but it seems to me that you're not able to stand up to your mother very much, am I right?"
"W-well . . ." Even though Crona knew this was true, he didn't want to admit it; he'd said way too much already.
"Crona, please-"
Just then, the front door of the house suddenly slammed open and shut, bringing the boys out of their discussion. Tamaki looked out the doorway of his room, and Crona took this momentary distraction as a chance to gently brush Tamaki's hands away from his shoulders. Tamaki glanced back at him, his eyes filled with sympathy and concern.
"Hey, guys, we're back!" Ed's voice came floating up the stairs.
"I still want to talk to you about this, but we can finish discussing it later; I'm guessing you don't want Ed and Al to know about it, right?" Tamaki asked, and Crona shook his head. Tamaki smiled kindly.
"I'll use everything in my power to help you get through this, so don't get too down, okay, Crona?"
Crona nodded and Tamaki turned to go find Ed and Al. As Tamaki started to walk away, Crona suddenly got the strongest feeling that he didn't want the blonde to leave.
"Tamaki!" he called out, reaching towards him.
"Hmm? What is it?" Tamaki asked, turning back to him. Realizing how strange he was acting, Crona dropped his hand to his side and gripped his arm instead.
"Um, nothing . . .," he said, looking at the ground. Tamaki gazed at him for a moment, and then shrugged and started to walk away again.
"Wait!" Crona exclaimed, and Tamaki glanced back to find the boy staring at him seriously.
"Um . . . t-thank you," Crona said quietly. When Tamaki smiled questioningly, he elaborated. "For caring about me, I mean. No one . . . no one's ever really done that before."
"Ah, mon ami, you don't have to thank me!" Tamaki laughed. "As I said before, I'm here for you from here on out!"
"Thank you anyway, Tamaki." A weight felt like it had been lifted off of Crona's shoulders as what Tamaki was saying finally sunk in.
There was at least one person in Crona's lonely world that cared about him.
It was a wonderful feeling.
Slowly, Crona's mouth turned up in a smile. It was small, but when Tamaki saw it, he clapped his hands together and grinned even wider, knowing that this was Crona's rare, true smile.
Just then, the boys heard light footsteps bounding up the stairs, followed by heavier, clanking ones. Tamaki turned to the doorway for just a moment, but when he looked back at Crona, the smile was gone, having been replaced by the boy's normal, slightly terrified look.
"There you guys are!" Ed said, grinning as he entered the room, followed closely by Alphonse.
"Hello, Ed, Al!" Tamaki said, his expression instantly brightening, and Crona had to once again admire how quickly Tamaki could hide his negative emotions.
"'Sup, Crona?" Ed said, giving Crona a quick wave.
"Oh, nothing . . .," the pink-haired boy said quietly, looking down at the floor.
"You two are back a lot earlier than I expected," Tamaki commented. "Did you find out any information you were looking for?"
Edward's shoulders sagged, and Alphonse shook his head.
"No," the suit of armor sighed. "We asked everyone we could, but no one recognized the symbol, or had seen any suspicious people walking around that could've been a homunculi."
"Um, what were you two looking for exactly?" Crona asked tentatively, not sure if they would want to tell him. Ed and Al glanced at each other for a second, debating how much to tell him, and then Ed shrugged and pulled a note card out of his pocket.
"We might as well fill him in," the alchemist said, walking over to Crona and holding out the card. "I found this note on my pillow last night; apparently, someone snuck through my window and put it there . . ."
"'P-pure soul?'" Crona squeaked, reading the note. He let out a gasp of surprise when he saw the symbol at the bottom; it was the same one that had been tattooed on Lust's chest.
"Oh Crona~" Ragnarok said in a singsong voice, surfacing in the back of Crona's mind. Crona flinched when Ragnarok's tone turned threatening. "You'd better not open your damn mouth anymore, you got that? You already said too much during your little cry-fest earlier! For some reason, I couldn't get through to you to make you shut up . . ."
"Yes, Ragnarok," Crona said quietly, staring at the floor again.
"And don't say my name aloud when there's people around, you damn idiot!" the Demon Sword hissed, making Crona wince again.
"Um, are you feeling okay, Crona?" Alphonse asked when the boy kept wincing. Crona stared at him with wide eyes and nodded slowly.
"Yeah. I'm fine." His gaze flickered to the card again. "Um, w-what's this symbol at the bottom?"
"It's the symbol of a homunculus," Ed informed him. When Crona frowned questioningly, he elaborated. "An artificial human; aka a being created when someone tries to use alchemy to bring people back from the dead."
"Back from the dead?" Crona echoed, his forlorn eyes wide. "You can do that?"
"Well, not really," Ed confessed, looking down at the floor. Tamaki put a reassuring hand on Ed's shoulder and Alphonse stepped in for the explanation, knowing that his brother didn't feel like talking about it again.
"You can't actually bring anyone back," the suit of armor explained solemnly. "There are lots of people who've tried to bring their loved ones back, but it never works; sure, you can get all the ingredients that make up a human being easily enough, but the one thing you can't get back is the person's soul. Without their soul, a person is basically nothing."
"Oh," was all Crona said as he digested this information. If Lust was a homunculus, then that meant she had basically been brought back from the dead . . . Crona shivered as he thought about who in the world would try to bring someone back to life, knowing that it wasn't possible.
"Alright, it's getting way too gloomy in here!" Ed announced suddenly, startling Crona. Ed grinned and clapped the shy boy on the shoulder. "So, you wanted to know how to make a transmutation circle, huh? Well, let's go outside and we'll show you, okay?"
Crona nodded and he, Tamaki, and Alphonse followed Ed through the house and out to the driveway, where Ed and Al proceeded to explain the mechanics of drawing a transmutation circle. After about forty-five minutes, Crona had gotten the basic circle down, and told the boys that he had to get home. Al drew a copy of the circle on a sheet of paper for Crona to look off of when he tried it at home, and they sent the boy on his way. As Ed and Al headed back into the house, Crona heard someone running behind him and turned to see Tamaki waving for him to stop.
"Um, i-is there something wrong, Tamaki?" Crona asked once Tamaki had caught up. The blonde was about to shake his head, but then he paused.
"Listen, Crona, please don't hesitate to call me if there's any trouble," he said, putting his hands on Crona's shoulders again. The concern was obvious in his violet eyes, and Crona gripped his arm and stared at the ground, once again feeling a pang of remorse at what he'd revealed earlier.
"Okay," he said quietly, and Tamaki wished he could do more for this poor child, wished he could just take him away from the home that was obviously causing him so much pain . . . but the blonde knew he couldn't. All he could do was give Crona's shoulder one last reassuring squeeze and send him on his way, hoping that Crona would take his advice and ask for help soon. Tamaki would just have to keep an eye on him until then.
Crona felt Tamaki's eyes on his back all the way down the driveway. He gripped the drawing of the transmutation circle tighter, wishing that he could tell Tamaki everything but knowing that he couldn't. Ragnarok wouldn't tell Medusa what Crona had revealed already, Crona knew, because then the Demon Sword would be punished as well. But, if Crona let anything else slip, then Tamaki might tell his father- which would mean he would be repeating what Crona had said straight to Medusa's face.
And if Medusa found out what Tamaki knew, then the blonde might be hurt as well . . .
Crona paused in the middle of the sidewalk, a slight frown crossing his face. Why did he just think that? Why was he concerned whether Tamaki got hurt or not? Just because Tamaki said he was his friend didn't mean that much . . . did it?
I mean, yes, it felt nice to hear that he cares about me, Crona thought, recalling how Tamaki had actually made him smile- and genuinely, at that. But I really shouldn't be making friends; I'll just have to leave them sooner or later . . .
He heaved a sigh. It seemed that no matter what he did, anyone he came across either got left behind as Medusa's plans moved on, or ended up dead.
Crona shivered. At least he hadn't been ordered to kill anyone so he could feed their souls to Ragnarok . . . yet.
Oh, I hope we move on before that happens, Crona thought, starting to walk again. He really had no desire to use his weapon anytime soon, let alone murder anyone in this innocent little town.
He shook his head to clear away these depressing thoughts and instead tried to focus on his next task: drawing a transmutation circle for Medusa and showing her that he could do alchemy. He un-crumpled the drawing Alphonse had given him and studied it all the way to his temporary house. When he got to the door he paused for a moment to brace himself, and then he turned the doorknob and stepped inside.
"This had better work, Crona," Medusa snapped, a slight frown creasing her lips. She was watching her son as he put the last few finishing touches on the transmutation circle. They were standing in the living room, having moved the rugs and furniture to reveal the hardwood floor underneath.
"Yes, Lady Medusa, it will," Crona said. He placed the chalk he had been drawing with on the ground, and then he winced as Ragnarok appeared out of his back.
"You'd better not mess this up, idiot!" the Demon Sword sneered, poking Crona in the cheek.
"Ragnarok, don't distract him," Medusa said, and Ragnarok immediately let go of Crona to stare at her. "Remember, you assured me that he could do this, so if he's lying then that means you're lying, too . . . and you know I don't take kindly to liars."
"Sorry, Lady Medusa!" Ragnarok said quickly, and then, after giving Crona one last pinch on the cheek, he disappeared into his Meister's back. Medusa stepped away from the transmutation circle and clasped her hands behind her back, gazing at Crona.
"Alright, show me," she commanded. Crona gulped, nodded, and turned to the transmutation circle. With sweaty hands, he placed the chunk of wood he'd picked up outside in the center of the circle. He took a deep breath, trying unsuccessfully to calm his nerves, and put his hands on the edge of the circle. He stared hard at the block of wood and envisioned it turning into a dog like before, putting all his energy into that image.
Nothing happened for a few seconds, and Crona started to panic. What if he'd been wrong? What if he couldn't do alchemy anymore? Medusa would be so angry . . .
Just then, a bright light burst forth from beneath Crona's hands. Medusa stared, transfixed, as the light traveled throughout the circle and engulfed the block of wood. After a moment, the light dispersed, leaving a little wooden dog in the chunk of wood's place.
Medusa rushed over and grabbed the dog, scrutinizing all of its details. Crona sat back and gripped his arm, hoping that the dog would meet Medusa's approval.
"Very good, Crona," Medusa said, a slow grin spreading across her face. Crona let out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding in a huge sigh of relief. He looked up at Medusa, who turned towards him.
"This will make our plan much easier," she commented. "We practically don't even need those Elric brothers anymore; you can make the transmutation circle for the pure soul! Now we just need to find it . . ."
"Um, L-Lady Medusa . . .?" Crona said tentatively, and Medusa glanced at him. "What exactly am I going to have to do?"
"I'll tell you that later," the witch replied. She smiled and placed a hand on Crona's shoulder, making the boy stiffen."But I do have some other news; Lust and I have figured out a way to find the pure soul!"
"Really?" Crona asked, surprised, and Medusa nodded.
"Lust and I combined all of our information on the pure soul and the philosopher's stone and came up with a potion that, if consumed, will give a clear indication of who the pure soul is. Of course, we're not going to be able to test it beforehand, so we have to hope it works . . . and that's where you come in."
Crona gripped his arm nervously, wondering what he'd have to do. Medusa moved in front of him and crouched down so she could look into his face.
"Now listen very carefully, Crona," she instructed, and Crona did his best not to avert his gaze to the floor. "Once I get this potion made, it's going to be your job to make sure that everyone in that Host Club of yours drinks it. If no one in that club turns out to be the pure soul, than you'll just have to try and give it to the rest of the school. But just stick to the Host Club for now. Do you understand, Crona?"
"Yes, Lady Medusa," Crona said, and then he frowned slightly. "But, um . . . h-how am I supposed to know who the pure soul is?"
"The potion will have a bitter taste to everyone but the pure soul," Medusa explained. "The person who doesn't immediately spit it out is the person you're looking for."
"Okay," Crona said, making a mental note of this fact.
"However, we'll still need a few days to actually make the potion- Lust is out gathering the ingredients now-, so you'll have to wait a little longer before you can give it out."
Crona nodded and then flinched as Medusa stood up suddenly. The witch narrowed her eyes at him.
"Make sure not to do anything that would blow our cover," she said, and Crona blanched.
She knows, he thought. She somehow found out what I told Tamaki . . . His breathing sped up and his heart started pounding as he tried to guess what Medusa was going to do to him.
"You're acting jumpier than usual," Medusa remarked, and Crona tried to brace himself for his punishment. His mother placed a hand on his shoulder and squeezed it pointedly. "I just wanted to make sure you're being careful; don't mess this up."
And with that, she turned and walked towards the door. Crona stared after her, confused.
"I'll come by again tomorrow," Medusa said as she turned the doorknob. Without giving Crona a second glance, she exited the house and slammed the door behind her.
Crona gazed at the closed door for a few seconds, bewildered. Maybe Medusa hadn't realized what he'd told Tamaki . . .
"Well, that was a lucky break!" Ragnarok commented, forming out of Crona's back and leaning on his Meister's head.
"I thought she knew what I'd said to Tamaki . . .," Crona said, feeling slightly relieved.
"She was suspicious, that's for sure." Ragnarok put his fists on both sides of Crona's head and squeezed. "You're such an idiot! I can't believe you let your feeling slip out like that! If that blonde idiot tells his 'dad,' we're dead meat!"
"He won't; he told me he wouldn't!" Crona exclaimed, trying vainly to push Ragnarok's hands away. The Demon Sword laughed scornfully.
"'He told me he wouldn't!'" he repeated mockingly. He grabbed Crona's hair and tugged the boy's head back, eliciting a whine of pain. "You'd better hope this guy is as much of a saint as you say he is, because I don't feel like getting punished because you put too much trust in someone!"
"Ow, stop it, Ragnarok!" Crona cried. The Demon Sword continued to grip his hair for a few more seconds and then released him, once again disappearing into his back.
Crona sniffed dejectedly, staring at the floor. He knew he shouldn't have put so much confidence into believing that Tamaki would keep his mouth shut, but for some reason he couldn't seem to find any doubt in what Tamaki had told him. If the Host King said he wouldn't reveal Crona's secret feelings, then Crona had every confidence that the blonde would stick to his word.
Crona sighed and stood up. He grabbed the edge of the rug that had haphazardly been pushed to the side and pulled it over the transmutation circle, all the while wondering who the pure soul would turn out to be . . .
* you poor and tortured child
A/N: The next chapter will be up on time! In the meantime, review please!