"I don't know what you two wanted with that set of daggers anyway," Isabela was saying as Hawke's little crew of misfits walked through Lowtown. "I mean they were gorgeous, but what use would either of you have for them?"
"Exactly," Hawke agreed. "If it weren't for the fuss you two raised, I would have asked Xenon for a better look. Those ironwood handles looked like they were made for my hand, and the serrations behind the trailing point? Perfect for maximum damage."
"What serrations?" Isabela asked. "And what ironwood? Those daggers were obviously aurum through and through, and the swage was sexy."
Anders and Fenris exchanged a look, for once in agreement. "There were no daggers," they said in unison and shot each other matched glares that silently said, Don't agree with me.
After more bickering, everyone could agree that they had all seen something different in the case.
"A kitten on the top? Really?" Isabela gibed. "What are you, a schoolgirl?"
Fenris snorted. If nothing else, he was adequately assured that Anders was not hiding any secrets about his gender.
"I like cats," Anders said defensively. "What should it have been? A naked woman? Who do I look like? You?"
Fenris attempted to fold his arms across his chest, which resulted in Anders stumbling into him with a curse.
"Stop it!"
There was no chance that Fenris was going to apologize to Anders, but he dropped his arms again.
They were getting a few more stares than usual until Isabela stopped them.
"One moment, unless you really do want all of Lowtown gossiping about how you two are playing sex games in public."
"If you have any ideas," Fenris said.
"Maker, no," Anders said.
"That's what I thought." She moved in to press against Anders' chest, her arms going around his neck while Fenris watched him go rigid with surprise.
"How is this supposed to help?" Anders asked, his voice strained. He put his hands behind his back as though afraid that having them anywhere near Isabela would result in spontaneous itching.
"Tch," she clicked her tongue at him and stepped back, pulling his kerchief out from under his coat. "I was just untying this. You need to lighten up, you used to be so much more fun."
She wrapped the chain with the kerchief and examined her work. "At least now it doesn't look like you two just escaped from prison."
Fenris wasn't altogether certain what it looked like, but he supposed it was at least an improvement over the dangling chain between them.
"Of course," she went on. "If you two would just hold hands, no one would really look twice because they would be distracted by the pretty and by the thought of what you two do together behind closed doors." She grinned. "Or maybe in sordid back alleys. Oh, I have to write that down!"
"No you do not," Fenris growled.
"Oh, I don't know," Hawke interjected. "I think it would be very popular."
"No!" Fenris and Anders said together.
"Have it your way," Isabela said in that tone that meant she was going to have it her way anyway.
"Let us simply not speak until we find the smith," Fenris said between gritted teeth.
It had to be the mage of all people. He had known Hawke and his companions for years and had never found himself forced to be near them by circumstance, but the one man of the group whose company he could not abide was the one he had been locked in a sarcophagus with and now chained to. It made him almost hope that it was true that the Maker had abandoned them, because otherwise it seemed that He had a truly capricious and unfunny sense of humor.
Isabela made a face and went to wrap her arm around Hawke's waist, leaning in to say something only he could hear. Whatever it was, it made Hawke laugh, leading Fenris to assume it was at their expense.
"She probably said we should just get drunk and have sex," Anders muttered. "That's her answer to most things."
"Which is no reason for you to say it for her," Fenris snapped.
"I was just—" Anders threw up his hands in exasperation, jerking on the chain. "Forget it. Sorry. I was just saying that was what she was saying. It definitely wasn't what I was thinking. What I was thinking was 'let's get these things off and then I don't want to see the elf for at least three years.'"
"Ten," Fenris said.
"Ten," Anders agreed. "Done deal."
• • •
"What's the metal?" Smith the smith asked when presented with the problem. "And can I keep it when I get them off?"
"Keep it," Fenris said. "I don't want it."
"We don't know what the metal is," Hawke said. "It's the kind that appears out of thin air."
"Hmpf," Smith muttered, tapping the chain with a fingernail before motioning them to follow him. "I don't know about the bracelets. Might break your bones chiseling them off or at least cut you up bad."
"We'll get by," Anders said, not mentioning that he would just heal them as soon as no one was looking. "Just get them off."
"Let's start with the chain." Smith motioned for them to follow him to his forge.
What followed was an exercise in breaking chisels, hammers, and ultimately, in denting the smith's anvil without making a mark on the chain.
Anders gave a heartfelt, "Shit!" which Fenris silently echoed as all five of them regarded the pristine metal.
"You owe me for those tools," Smith informed them.
• • •
"No shit?" Varric drawled, hefting part of the chain in his hand. "Broke Smith's anvil?"
"Dented it," Hawke said. "Cost a fair bit of coin just to have him tell us he couldn't do anything about it."
Fenris shifted from foot to foot and pulled lightly on the chain. "Do you have any ideas? Perhaps a dwarven smith would have better results."
"Maybe," Varric said thoughtfully. "Maybe not. I'll see who I can get to have a look at it, but it seems to me this is more mage territory than dwarven. We're not big on magicking metal out of thin air. What about you, Blondie, no big ideas?"
"If I had any don't you think I'd have tried them by now?" Anders snapped.
"Touchy, touchy," Varric said mildly. "Didn't anyone teach you not to get pissy with the guy who's trying to help you?"
Anders pulled a face. "Sorry."
"No problem. Why don't you two sit down while I see about sending out a few messages." Varric pointed a stubby finger at Anders. "I'm sending in some wine. Drink it. I don't want to hear anything from Justice about it, it's medicinal."
"I c—"
"Drink it," Varric, Isabela, and Hawke chorused.
"Drink it," Fenris agreed. "But if I hear a word about mage rights from you, I shall consider simply cutting your hand off to free myself.
"Oh!" Isabela said. "Like a wolf gnawing its leg off to get out of a trap?"
"After a fashion," Fenris agreed, pointedly meeting Anders' eyes to ensure the mage saw he meant every word of it.
"Bastard," Anders grumbled and dropped into one of Varric's low chairs, pulling on the chain to force Fenris to either do the same or loom over him like a bodyguard.
Fenris sat.
Isabela's face lit with an idea. She squealed with delight and leaned in to whisper something in Hawke's ear.
He grinned the kind of grin that made Fenris immediately suspicious. "You're brilliant," he said and patted her backside before leaving the room, and from what Fenris could see, the tavern altogether.
Isabela stared shamelessly at Hawke's back until he was out of sight, murmuring appreciatively, "That ass…" Then she opened one of Varric's cabinets to pull out a deck of cards. "Diamondback anyone?"
• • •
Fenris was down half a sovereign by the time Varric returned with a dwarven woman in tow and two wine bottles stood empty on the table with a third already half gone.
"This is Lista. Lista, these are the gentlemen I was telling you about. Fenris," he nodded to Fenris. "And Anders." Adding when Isabela cleared her throat, "And Isabela, but don't mistake her for a gentleman."
Isabela raised her wine glass to Lista in a toast. "Too right. Now let's see the cards, boys."
Anders tossed his cards face down on the table. "Just pickpocket my money and steal from me honestly already. What do Kirkwall's poor need with bandages and herbs?"
Fenris laid out his cards and turned away to look Lista over while Isabela chortled gleefully as she took the pot.
She was tall for a dwarf, but proportionally broad, dark skinned with dark hair pulled back in a severe ponytail. She had a large leather case slung over her shoulder with a strap. Unusually for most dwarves Fenris had met other than Varric, she also had a broad smile.
"Let's see the magic metal," she said, grinning. "I'm always up for a challenge, but you two are so pretty I should have asked Varric for a different fee."
"Lista," Varric said, although his warning tone failed considering he was clearly trying not to laugh. "Much to the disappointment of many of the Rose's patrons, neither of them is for rent."
"Disappointed patron right here," Isabela agreed while she shuffled the cards. "Do you play diamondback, Lista?"
"Not with women who put the best cards in their tits I don't," Lista retorted while she ambled over to the table to pick up the chain that hung between Fenris and Anders.
"Oh, I never put them in my tits," Isabela said with a grin. "Everyone is always staring at them."
"Too right," Anders agreed before putting his free hand over his mouth. "I didn't say that. It's the wine talking."
"Yes you did," Isabela crowed. "I knew you were looking. Don't you just want to do that electricity thing again?"
"No!" snapped Fenris while Lista snickered under her breath.
"I warned you," Varric said while he poured himself a glass of wine. "Did I not warn you, Lista?"
"You did," Lista agreed, still smirking while she opened the case she had brought along and started setting out vials on the table.
"Okay, boys, I need you to hold still. If you shake this thing around I might end up burning a hole in Varric's table and then he'll never invite me to any of the good parties again."
"I would always invite you, Lista," Varric said, putting a hand over his heart. "I would say you were my favorite girl if Bianca wouldn't get jealous."
"You say that to all the girls," Lista said while she dipped a glass pipette in one of the vials and let a drop of some clear liquid fall onto one of the chain links. "Does he say it to you, Isabela?"
"All the time," Isabela agreed. "But I found a way to get back at him."
"Oh?" Lista tsked when she didn't see the result she was looking for and dripped a different liquid over the first before wiping it away with a piece of wool. "Share."
"Don't flirt with Varric," Isabela gave Varric a sly glance. "Flirt with Bianca. He gets all flustered, it's the cutest thing."
"Cute?" Varric asked, putting a hand over his heart. "Cute? You wound me Isabela. Whatever happened to Paragon of Manliness?"
Lista snorted while she repeated her drip and observe process with the contents of a different vial. "Paragon of Manliness? Really? Varric Tethras, it's a good thing you're a surfacer because your swelled head would never fit in a proper thaig."
Anders looked over Lista's head at Fenris. "Do you ever get the feeling you're redundant?"
"No," Fenris said, although truthfully, the answer was yes.
"Boys," Lista said, even as she wiped the links dry again, "this isn't looking good so far, but I'm not done yet."
"What is it that you are doing?" Fenris asked.
"I'm testing the metal," Lista said. "If it had been silverite, the first vial would have turned it orange. If it had been orichalcum, the second one would have made it smoke, and so on. All metals have something they react to, and once you know what it is, you know how to work it. So far I'm not having much luck."
"Here they are!"
Hawke's voice turned their attention away from Lista to where he stood in the door to Varric's suite. Now Fenris saw what errand Isabela had sent him off on – behind him he could see Sebastian and Aveline, and peeking under his arm, Merrill.
"Venhedis!"
"Shit!"
Amazing how the two men in two languages could manage exactly the same tone.