Warning : this OS is 'very mean' towards poor Mattie, I'd like to explain that I know that the real Matt is not like that, not like that, not like that... *goes on repeating that and apologises with the weal Matthew*
Uh, wait. It's not that 'this' Dom is better * apologises with the real Dominic, too, and repeats he's not like that as well*
Before reading, to understand it all better, I guess you should watch this :
http:/ / www. /watch?v=1o0FzRzsrHg (Q8 commercial)
(in this commercial the first man says 'good morning ' to his moody neighbour who replies the same, in a sarcastic way. And then, at the service station, he asks the clerk to give him the same thing his neighbour asked for… as the commercial voice talks about the reasons why you should choose that fuel to free the 'real power ' of your car's engine , simply! ^^ )
So now you saw this commercial with explanations… but what happens if our dear Matthew sees this commercial without it?
Check it out! ;)
The diesel fuel (of Matt's dreams)
"Dom, hurry up! You've been locked inside there for hours!" Matthew yells from downstairs.
"What can I say? I'm getting ready, properly!" Dom yells back from their bathroom.
"Getting ready for what? We are going to the Gym! And this was your idea, you, stubborn guy!" Matthew makes him notice, as he contemplates himself at the mirror, in his very sporty outfit: the football kit of the English national team.
"You never know what could happen, life is full of surprises. What if we met some paparazzi? I can't be messy, no bloody way!" the blond states, as he peeps out from the room, still half-dressed.
"Dominic, dear, you understood where we are going, didn't you? Hell yeah you're going to be messy there!" the brunet strikes back.
"Don't be so sure about that. I'm a resourceful guy. Now, let me finish, I'll be ready in a minute!" Dom insists, locking himself inside the bathroom again.
Matthew knows very well what Dom means with 'a minute', so in order to kill the time he resorts to the TV, hoping to find something that makes him rack his brain to figure out what's about.
He tunes it on a channel where there are commercials. More specifically, it's a commercial where there's a man who is putting his dog in the boot of his car.
There's another man, the neighbour, with a face like thunder, inside his battered car.
The first man says something to the second one, but Matt can't understand it, just like he can't understand the moody reply from the rude man.
The English musician observes the first man as he sets his own car in motion which also sets something in motion in Matt's mind.
As soon as the same thing happens even to the second man's car, the singer has the absolute certainty of it.
"DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMM!" Matt shouts, controlling himself not to jump like a kid.
"I told you to wait…" the blond protests, but it's useless, since the brunet places himself in front of him.
"I don't care, there's no time left. We must go. You have no idea about what I've just found out." Matt cuts Dom off, hyper.
Dominic is still half dressed, wearing only shorts, but Matthew has foreseen it and he has the solution.
"Here, wear this so we can go!" he says as he puts on Dom one of his National English team t-shirts.
He's about to drag Dom away with him, but the blond tugs his arm.
"Wait, why all this rush? However, there's a thing I have to verify first," the drummer informs his boyfriend, as he places himself in front of the mirror staring at his own refection inside the Rooney t-shirt. "Yeah, it fits me to a T. I'm awesome. OK, we can go to the Gym." he states, following the guitarist.
"Forget the sodding Gym, we have more important stuff to do!" Matt blathers, taking his partner's hand and rushing towards his Mercedes Benz.
"Matthew, what the hell is wrong with you?" Dom jumps aboard, a little bit scared, as Matthew puts himself at the wheels.
"Hold tight, we're heading for Q8!" Matt informs him, as he goes into a lane.
"What is that? A Planet? Gee, Bells, quit with your obsession for aliens!" Dom rolls his eyes as he fastens his belt.
"Nope, no planets, it's a service station, we just have got to find one. Once we are there, honey, we'll find the diesel fuel of the future, you won't believe your eyes!" Matt informs him as he presses the car throttle, taking advantage of the fact that the way is clear.
"OK, I haven't understood yet what it's going on," Dom states, calmly. "The only thing I know is that we're not in England, so, damn you, Bells, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WAITING FOR? MAKE A BLOODY U-TURN!" he snaps nervously.
"Huh! You're right," Matt smiles at his boyfriend innocently, as he makes the U-turn before someone else makes him notice that though not as gently as Dom did. "You know, 'Policemen' is another word I learnt to say in Italian, very well." he confesses.
"No wonder why I'm not surprised at all!" the other grumbles.
Matthew manages to calm down, driving conscientiously and they wander around until Matt finally catches a glimpse of his craved service station, giving out a scream that almost seems an ultrasound.
The gasoline pump attendant on duty, a man around fifty years old, sees from afar two guys walking towards him, he can't help noticing they look somewhat familiar.
He doesn't think that they are soccer players, although they do have football kits on, one of Lampard and the other of Rooney.
The guy with the Lampard shirt speaks first and the attendant realises he's English. Lucky for him, he speaks English fluently.
Matthew is happy to find a man who understands their language.
"Fill it up, fill it up. Could you please fill it up?" he asks the man slightly agitated, giving him the money.
The attendant obliges, he keeps staring at them, trying to recall where he has already seen them until he remembers all the posters that cover his thirteen year old daughter's room.
He smiles to himself, picturing in his mind the moment when he brings his daughter their autographs. Too bad that one guy is missing.
However, now he has a job to finish.
"Now you'll see…" Matthew whispers to Dominic, as he observes the fuel tank being filled, but he's really disappointed when, after the job is done, he sets his car in motion, but nothing happens.
"Excuse me, could you tell me what I did wrong?" Matthew asks the attendant, politely.
The older man stares at the brunet, puzzled.
"Excuse me, what do you mean, Sir?"
"Maybe it's because there must be a dog inside the car, right? Well, I don't have got a dog, but I've got Dominic!" the singer goes on, pointing at the blond who is still trying to figure out what it's going on. "Besides, I also have got an unbearable neighbour, although now he is only god knows where making a movie." Matthew goes on.
Instinctively, the clerk decides that it's not a good idea to ask that crazy guy an autograph.
Maybe he will be luckier with the second guy, after all, he seems to be less disquieting.
"Oh, wait. I got it. It's because I've got to sing the song, right? Okay, I can do it: I WANT IT ALL, I WANT IT ALL, I WANT IT ALL AND I WAAANT IT NOOOOOW " the pianist realises and he starts singing loudly.
Dominic and the attendant stare at each other, confused.
"Excuse me, Sir, could you tell me what's wrong with your friend? Why is he acting like that?" the clerk asks the blond.
"You know, man, usually I understand him pretty easily, but this time I have no bloody idea what's wrong with him." the drummer replies, at a complete loss.
"What's wrong? I'll tell you what. I put the bloody fuel in the bloody tank, but my car didn't turn into a ship!" Matt complains.
Dominic is stunned.
"But… that's only a commercial!" the attendant explains, shocked.
"That's right," the brunet nods, glad that he understood. "A commercial of the new fuel that turns cars into ships… and I want it!" he adds.
"So, is it true? Is there really a fuel that turns cars into ships?" Dom asks his mate for confirmation.
"That's what I was trying to tell you." the frontman smiles at him.
"That's wonderful!" the blond rejoices, in jubilation. "It means that everything is possible, today cars that turn into ships… tomorrow machines that can turn back time!" he figures out, as he goes into ecstasies.
The clerk changes his mind about his previous intention to ask the blond an autograph, as he takes a deep breath, explaining to them how things really are.
"So… there will be no ship, right?" Matt asks for confirmation, ruefully and the older man reasserts that.
"ç°°°°*****§§§* * %£!" Matt fires away.
"Matt, dear, try to repeat that with a more human speed, now." Dominic patiently advises him, since, just like the attendant and every single human being in the whole world, he didn't understand anything of what Matt has said.
"Why do you deceive poor people so badly? I mean, you could turn that sodding car into anything else: a train, an airplane, a camel but NOT a ship, never a ship. This is playing with people's feelings, it's so cruel!" Matt repeats slowly, but not less nervously, before going inside the car.
"He has got some points, after all. You should pay more attention, signal that, maybe even put a warning placard. This is not the way to behave, think about it, next time." Dom states, before reaching his mate inside the car.
The clerk watch them leaving, dumbfounded. Now he's not so sure anymore if he really wants to allow his daughter to go to their next Italian concert, in Verona.
"Mattie, I guess we should better avoid Italian television for a while, at least the commercials." Dom recommends, on their way back home.
"You know better than me that we're going to do that again and again… it's a way too strong temptation!" the other grumbles, still upset.
"What if tonight I dressed up as a sailor? Would that cheer you up? You can dress up as an admiral, of course!" the drummer suggests, earning one of Matthew's brightest smiles, as the singer stares at him with adoring eyes.
"Oh, Dommie, I love you so, so much!"
THE END
See? For once, a less sedentary story, although, judging by the mess they made, it was better if they remained home, lol!
Believe, me, they're going to make even a bigger mess!
Well, I don't know which car the real Matthew has got, but I picture him perfectly with a Mercedes Benz! ^^
I hope you enjoyed it (honestly, it's the OS I had more fun to write and plot)
Fell free to tell me everything, of course!