Secrets and Determination

Disclaimer: I do NOT own any of the Twilight characters. And BECAUSE of this fact, I've taken up into torturing at least TWO of my least favorite characters in the book. HATE YOU, SAM! The only thing that saves you in my eyes is that hottie Chaske (although that haircut is really ruining my fantasies). HATE YOU, EMILY! YOU MUFFIN-PUSHING WHORE! I've got nothing against Tinsel…except that she's always posing in her pics. Uh…vain much?

I hear the news of your return and immediately rush over to your house to see you, to talk to you, to ask you 'what the hell you think you were doing'. I'm only mildly surprised to find out that you're not at home; Seth tells me as he's sitting on the couch with Quil and Embry all watching a movie. I chuckle lightly because you are more than likely over at the Cullens to see your imprint, E.J. I clarify my thoughts with Seth and I'm confused by the strange looks I'm receiving all around.

"Over at the Cullens?" Seth asks as if it was the dumbest question in the world.

"Yes, Leah's over at the Cullens." I state this time rather than ask. I feel a slight air of superiority over the boys because I know something that they don't.

"I don't think Lee has left Jake's room since she got back." Quil states with a smug and proud grin. Embry chuckles and the two of them high-five one another as Seth pales and sticks out his tongue in disgust as if shaking a nasty image from his head.

"You're wrong." I state to the three boys sitting on the couch and I find myself losing my patience and temper with them. "Leah has an imprint and she's with him right now."

"Who told you that?" Embry asks narrowing his eyes at me suspiciously. I become aware that the other two are also eyeing me carefully.

"Leah's imprint," I sneer crossing my arms, "told me. I saw her, E.J. and Jacob at the store some weeks back." I state and they all exchange looks with one another.

"Well you were sadly mistaken, Emily." I turn around and I see you standing in the doorway with a smug Jacob Black behind you. My eyes widen as I slowly back up and put some distance between us. The look in your eyes is sheer murder, anger and a warning flare. I'm not really sure what it is I'm afraid of but maybe it's because I've, literally, walked into another wolf's den and my own pack isn't around to protect me.

"Lee-Leah," I greet nervously nodding my head at you. A deep growl escapes your lips as you stand unmoving with your arms crossed tightly in front of your chest.

"Listen to me and listen to me good, Emily." You snarl at me, moving forward as I continue to back up. "You will forget that imprint bullshit you were just spouting a few moments ago." You demand and I suddenly realize that I've backed myself up against the wall. I stare at you in fear and confusion. I must shake my head and open my mouth preparing to say something but you cut me off. "I'm not fucking around here, Emily. I'm no longer imprinted on the child you saw that day. And I'd like to keep this under wraps, got it?" You demand and I dumbly nod my head agreeing.

"Lay off some, Lee." Jacob calls walking up behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and pulling you back into his chest. I breathe a small sigh of relief the moment the intimidation, danger and heat is gone. "You're about to make her piss on the floor." Jacob adds before he starts kissing and nuzzling your neck.

Seth whines and complains about the two of you giving it a rest and being respectful of siblings' presence when they get 'like that'. Quil and Embry are unfazed and turn their attention back to the TV, both seeming content now that the whole pack is back together.

I head towards the door feeling out of place in this small group of wolves who once upon a time used to have nothing but kind word for me, wanted me to acknowledge their presence and bake them muffins. I realize now that you've taken that place and have, inadvertently, received a promotion judging by the way Jacob holds you so tightly. I look back with a small frown as Jacob sits down in a recliner and pulls you into his lap. The warm and content smile on his face is heartwarming but I cannot help but worry about the imprint that you've broken.

"Why?" I surprise myself with the question as you and your pack all look back at me.

"Why…what?" Seth asks prompting me to continue and clarify.

"Why did you break it?" I ask after a few moments of awkward silence and building up my confidence. I know the moment the question passes my lips I regret the answer that will come.

"Because I want to be able to choose who I want to be with. Anything worth having is worth fighting for." You answer simply with a small smile on your face. You're not looking at Jacob but I know you're referring to him. "I've lost so much because of this wolf business and I refuse to lose anymore. I want to learn how to heal myself instead of letting some magic wheel of 'imprint roulette' decide for me. I don't want the others to know because I don't want to be lectured about how I've gone against fate. I especially don't want to go into details about how I accomplished it." You continue on closing your eyes for a moment. "This is my choice and I'm willing to live with it."

I nod my head as if the explanation is all that I was looking for. Turning I say my good byes and walk out the door, my head filled with thoughts of 'what-ifs' and more. If Sam found out the truth that you broke your imprint for Jacob what would he do? What would he think of the whole situation? Would he lecture you, only to turn around and try to break the imprint himself? I shiver wrapping my arms tightly around my body to fight off the cold chill that is surrounding me. I know that Sam still loves you even if you have moved on with another. I decide to keep the secret to myself in fear of losing the one fate had decided to hand to me.

As much as I'd love to have you return back to your imprint; I find myself torn between the two options. If you were to remain with the Cullens, you'd eventually leave with them and I'd probably never see you again and nor would Sam. As much as I know you'd much prefer to never see either one of us again, it doesn't change the fact that we both still want you there. I guess it's selfish of me either way; whether you stay with your imprint and prove that it is love or break your imprint and still allow Sam the option to see you.

As I walk into our home I see Sam sitting on the couch with some of the pack all watching a movie. I'm greeted warmly and I can't help but notice the similarities and differences between our two packs. Or maybe the only difference lies in the fact that we're not all just one big, happy family anymore? I kiss Sam on the cheek before heading into the kitchen where he follows me. I prepare to start cooking lunch for a pack of hungry wolves and I feel him watching my every move closely. He's observing me to see if everything is alright as I am sure that he can smell your scent on me.

"She's fine, Sam." I answer with a sigh. I hear him shift awkwardly from one foot to the other behind me and clear his throat.

"Was – was Jacob there?" Sam asks and I feel a part of my heart break at the poorly executed nonchalance in his voice.

"Yes, he and the rest of the pack were all there." I answer deciding to ease his tension and concern. That answer seems to satisfy him as he walks up and kisses my scarred face, peppering it with sweet, small pecks.

Sam's POV

The first packs meeting is held since Leah's return and I sit with Paul beside me awaiting your arrival. Jacob is sitting not too far off to the right, low annoyed growls rumbling from his throat as each second you're not here ticks by. Seth had stopped by letting us know that Leah was being held up at the Cullens but that she was on her way. Jacob refused to start the meeting without her and the only reason he is still sitting here is because Billy told him to sit down and be patient.

Patience definitely isn't one of his virtues.

Eventually you show up and you smile sheepishly offering up your apologies to the Council as you take your seat next to Jacob. He must give you a look because you reach over and pat his hand. It frustrates me when I see him take hold of your hand and intertwine your fingers. I'm not really sure what the meeting is about as all I can focus on is how his thumb casually, slowly and meticulously strokes your thigh and you draw meaningless patterns on the back of his hand.

"The Cullens believe there will be some of the Volturri in the area soon." You speak up drawing my attention away from your busy hands and up to your face. The Council grows silent looking at you and Jacob asks if this bit of information is what kept you for so long. You nod your head in confirmation and begin going into details about what was seen.

"What are they after this time?" Paul asks with a deep growl.

"It seems that they are interested in checking up on the child." You answer matter-of-factly and I can't help but notice that there isn't any sign of complete fear in your eyes; thus proving that the rumors of you imprinting on the spawn were just that – rumors.

"Will we need to get involved?" Old Quil asks and you look to Jacob for the answer.

"I'm guessing that since my pack has pulled back on patrolling the Cullen territory it's easier for Alice to see the future." Jacob explains with a shrug. I frown deeply because that's not an answer to whether or not he's going to be involved. I refuse to put my pack in unnecessary danger, however, if he insists in helping his Bella Cullen then I'll have no choice. I won't stand aside and let you get hurt because of this pup.

"I think we should move our territory elsewhere and keep a closer eye on Fork and Port Angeles for the time being." You offer up. "Alice doesn't think that they'll cause trouble but…there maybe others that will follow soon after." This extra information seems to be the real matter of concern.

We all listen as you tell us that Alice has seen a few other covens discussing coming up here to see not only the child but the wolves as well. They keep changing their minds about when they will come but they are dead-set on coming up here to our rainy peninsula. It is agreed unanimously that we'll train and patrol in order to be prepared for this second wave of vampires, opting to leave the Italian leeches alone.

In the meantime, you and Jacob start to get more serious. The entire rez is abuzz with the idea that you two are together. It eats me up inside because once upon a time it was us that were the greatest couple; but now it's all everyone at the trade store, tribal gatherings and even at the beach can seem to talk about.

Everyone is so happy that you've moved on from me; that you've found real love and happiness with Jacob Black. It hurts to hear people talk like this, especially in my presence, because it makes it sound as if I never really loved you to begin with. I want to find you and let you know that I've always loved you and that I always will; that you were my first and only choice to have as my wife, to stand by my side and be the mother of my children.

Your relationship with Jacob Black seems to grow stronger and stronger with each passing day. Before where it looked as if you were hesitant or reluctant to show your affection towards Jacob Black out in public is soon forgotten and I'm forced to watch you walk down the street hand-in-hand with him. When you participate in the traditional tribal dances it's him that you stand by after it is over and what was once the sense of pride that belonged to me as people praise you for your beautiful dancing is now being bestowed upon him. He is the one that gets to hold you close, whisper in your ear, make you giggle and even blush.

I've finally had enough of this, this relationship when I stop by Billy's house and happen to see Jacob focused on something in his hands. He doesn't sense or at least acknowledge my presence when I walk into the house and find him sitting at the kitchen table with his back to me. As I move around him to see what he is working on is when I see it and, immediately, recognize what it is he's working on.

A promise bracelet?

I stand watching as he finishes up his work and smiles proudly down at it. I want to phase and rip it to shreds; I want to phase and rip him to shreds. Turning I storm out of the house and head directly for your house. I don't bother knocking as I open the door it bangs loudly against the wall. I'm sure it leaves a dent or maybe a hole in the wall but I don't care.

You and Seth both come running into the kitchen to see what is going on and you both freeze seeing me standing there. For a moment, my anger is gone as I stand looking at the two of you standing side-by-side. It reminds me of the day I came back to the rez after returning to my human form. I had snuck into my room and grabbed some pants but right afterwards I ran to your house. You were the first person that I had wanted to see; I wanted you to hold me, run your fingers through my hair and speak softly to me telling me that everything was going to be okay. You both have that same look upon your face as if you're not sure whether or not I'm a danger or a threat. You'll never know that it was that hesitation that made me realize that I shouldn't be around you – that maybe I was a monster.

"Sam, what's going on?" Seth asks speaking up as both of your bodies slowly relax. My eyes dart from you to Seth and back to you again. "Sam?" Seth calls again.

"You can't do this, Lee-Lee." I blurt out finding myself able to move again as the anger fuels my drive.

"Do what?" You ask and look to Seth for clarification. Seth only shrugs his shoulders and I continue moving towards you.

"Be in a relationship with Jacob Black." I growl out quickly taking your hands into mine. You quickly snatch your hands away before I even I have a chance to savor and enjoy the warmth and long-missed contact between us.

"You've got some nerve, Samuel Uley." You spit wiping your hands on your shirt as if I was dirty and carrying some disease. I hear a soft 'uh-oh' come from Seth but I keep my eyes focused on you. I want you to look into my eyes and see the love and concern I still have for you.

"You can't do this, Lee-Lee," I growl out.

"Stop calling me, Lee-Lee." You growl at me as your eyes darken. "You left me. You chose Emily over me. You've made your decision to live a life separate from mine. Just because you imprinted," You growl out as you stand tall and glare up at me. "Doesn't give you the right to just come barging into my home as if you owned it and begin telling me who I can and cannot be with."

"I DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE, LEE-LEE!" I yell back at you. My chest puffs out as I breathe heavily trying to control the wolf inside of me. He's angry and wants to be unleashed so he can lash out and destroy. But I keep it in check for you.

"There's always a choice, my dear Sammie." You state with a smug grin on your face. The flash of confidence and knowing in your eyes deflates my anger. "Nothing is set in stone except for our own inevitable death." You state. "I've fought to have this relationship with Jake and I'm not going to let you or anyone else come in and try to take it from me."

I feel a piece of my heart break as I see the determination in your eyes. You've invested so much into this thing with Jacob Black; you've got both of your teeth and claws dug in and you're not budging. Your eyes sparkle when you mention his name and I wonder did I ever have the same effect on you.

"Lee-Lee…he'll, he'll imprint and will leave you broken." I whisper out trying to use your hurt and dark past against you. Its low I know but I need you to see the truth.

"If Jacob no longer wants me anymore than, so be it." You answer calmly and I look down at you in awe. "I'll just get up and move on to find an even stronger love than what I feel for Jacob."

Stronger love?

"I'm not going to live my life in fear that someone is going to up and leave me some day, Sam." You state shaking your head. "And I don't want nor need you coming around trying to remind me of my past." There is a low hiss in your speech and I step back from you.

"I think it's time you left, Sam." Seth growls out taking a forceful step forward. I answer him back with one of my own but it is cut short as I turn to hear an even angrier and threatening growl behind me.

"You heard him, Sam." Jacob Black growls out standing in the doorframe. Jacob Black has never intimidated me as I had 4-years over him but at the moment he frightened me. His massive frame, blocking the path that I came through, his head hung low, his dark eyes locked onto me, his muscle tense and ready to lunge at me. With a sigh and a growl I turn and walk away from you, leaving you to Jacob Black; a pup that can only hurt you.

A/N: So here goes the next update. This story doesn't seem to require to much emotional involvement as does Wake-up Call and even Decision. I'm going to try and get some other stories finished tomorrow since I'm hitting the gym tonight. I'm really afraid that the gym is going to hit me back. T-T Gawd, I hope there's no resistance training today. I did that shit Thursday.

So last week…my armpits hurt. Yea, yea I know. O_o? WTF is she talking? I had the exact same reaction when I went to raise my arms for a well-deserved stretch and like the muscles there were tight. I have pretty good high tolerance for pain or sometimes I'm just too lazy to whine about it. But there was tight, prickling sensation which has then spread to my…what are those? Are there muscles going to your boobs? Can't really call them pectorals…or can I? But it's like my muscles are straining to hold Rachel and Bianca up…well more so Bianca than Rachel. *glares down at left boob* Damn you bitch! Always causing trouble.

But make my day worthwhile and help the twins calm down by leaving me a review. Oh and if you haven't done so yet go check out Wake-up Call. Yea, I'm plugging my own story but with these 13 ¼" guns *flexes arms* I'm telling you to go check it out. What's like 15 chapters? That's some Jake and Leah goodness to be reading on. Plus, PLUS there's a hot alpha in there too with gorgeous gray eyes. ^-^ Hehehee. So now click that button right here at the bottom and just let your fingers do the work. Tell me what you think; whether you like it, love it, hate it – think I'm a horrible writer and I just need to give the art up completely or DIE! Or tell me you completely disagree with that earlier statement and want to say, "Kei! Don't you ever think that way about your writing." Stroke this Kat's ego a bit. ^-^

Thanks!