Sorry I haven't updated in a long while. My finals for school had taken away my time. Now that school's over. I might be able to update twice a week.

Twilight-to-Nightfall- lol I'm glad you liked it!

chocolateriku-lmao okay, I'll try to find somewhere to put it in chapter 11 or 12.

inuyashaHELP- i would die T-T

JessYukiOnna-lma so am i! GO KADAJ!

shadowed crescents-your lucky you have a japanese teacher >-

Din'sBlaze- yeah me too! i coudln't find any so i made one! lol

dEEjayXiAN- thank you! lol I try to make it cute.

NeverGoodbyeRoxas-there's complexity? lol oops, i must have done that by accident.

Moon-Freak00-thank you! yeah there's hardly any straight roxas fics.

Recorder Kame768->- im making everyone cry! lol

Mission 10

When I awoke, the scent of Roxas filled my lungs. My eyelids slowly opened, I remembered the night before, how I had slept in Roxas's room. At first, the light blinded me. I sat up, and looked around. Roxas's room was lit up in a strange way. Or was it just that I felt strange? The world felt fake to me. It was like I was a lost memory, like I didn't really exist. I peered over the edge the bed and saw Roxas still sleeping, on the floor.

I sighed and smiled; the strange feeling I had was gone now. He looked just as he had in the hospital. He looked so innocent, so much like a real person. Maybe I could be like him one day. Then doubt rose in the back of my mind. I felt guilty by what I had done to Ren'ai and Riku. I was friends with Riku, could I ever be friends with him again? Would they ever forgive me? Probably not.

I let myself fall back onto the bed with my arms spread wide. I stared at the ceiling, how interesting. I pulled my cloak over my head after I had risen from the bed. I trotted downstairs in hopes that Xemnas wouldn't be upset about the other day. Maybe he would kick me out, I sure hoped he didn't. I had no where else to go if he did.

Instead of a nobody, Riku was sitting on the couch. I stopped walking, he turned to face me. I didn't want to know that Ren'ai was here, please, let her not be here.

"Hello Kirai." Riku said, he didn't sound angry, but he did sound rather cold.

I didn't respond back because I felt a hand on my shoulder, I turned around and there was Ren'ai. He long blonde hair was as perfect as usual, while mine was quite messy. She had a smile on her face, which was normal. I knew her better though, she was up to something. Her hand on my shoulder had already caused me to feel queasy. She took her hand off of my shoulder and walked towards Riku.

"What the hell are you doing here!" I asked, nervously.

Ren'ai was now at Riku's side. She placed her hand on his shoulder, just like how she had done to me.

"Look Kirai…I know you're not happy. You pretend to have a heart but it's useless. Please, your life would be so much better if we just reunited."

I had feared this, I hated Ren'ai for this reason. She cannot see anyone's point of view other than her own. It's a bad trait, but not to her. She didn't want to become friends with me it seemed. She walked slowly towards me and the feeling of being in a dream came to me. I looked at my hands and saw my skin was becoming a bit see-through. I felt weak and I slowly sank to my knees. Ren'ai stepped closer and bent down to touch my shoulder; her hand was almost burning through my skin. The pain was unbearable.

My muscles began to twitch, my consciousness was being pulled away from me and I felt myself being reunited with Ren'ai. I clutched the part of my chest where my heart should be. It burned, it stung, and it hurt. I groaned with pain as the edges of my vision blurred, I was going to fade away, just as I had wished not to. I heard a loud shouting and I lifted my head with the little strength I had left. Roxas was standing there on the tops of the steps.

I tried to reach out my hand towards him, I wished he could have grabbed my hand, I wished he could save me. Roxas would be strong enough to evade Sora so why couldn't I be stronger than Ren'ai? I wanted to be with Roxas, I wanted to experience what Ren'ai did with Riku. I wanted what she had. I wanted a heart, I wanted to be a person. The weakness I felt reflected my life, a sad story about a girl who wouldn't make it.

But life was like that. Not everyone makes it, not everyone dies happy. I wanted to be one of the few but I guess it wasn't meant to be…

My vision blurred and I couldn't make out Roxas's face clearly anymore. He just stood there, leaning forward. A tear trickled town my cheek and I feel into darkness.

Roxas's Point of View

Kirai was fading away and I could do nothing about it. She faded and slowly sank into Ren'ai's body. She was gone…Ren'ai stood up with a bright smile on her face, she was happy, twirling around like nothing happened. She was almost glowing with happiness. Riku came up to her and placed his arms over her shoulders. He began to twirl her around, while I just stood there. My whole body went numb and cold.

Riku and Ren'ai completely ignored me. They went on for god knows how long. I couldn't move from where I was. My mind wouldn't accept the lost of Kirai. Could she really be gone? I could still see her smile her laugh.

No she couldn't be gone. I stampeded down the stairs to find Riku and Ren'ai heading out the door. My fist couldn't be tighter. My throat but I managed to scream out,

"What the FUCK did you do to her?"

Riku and Ren'ai both turned around, clearly stunned to see me. I don't think they had noticed me before. They took no more than two seconds to look at me, they completely ignored me and left out the door. I opened the door after them and ran. Ren'ai turned around to face me when she noticed I was following her. We were right in front of the forest. She had a sneering smile on, one that sent goosebumps down my spine.

"What do you want? Your precious Kirai? She's a part of me lover boy."

"Shut up! Shut UP!" I yelled at her.

My hood was over my head and I looked at the ground when I summoned my two Keyblades. I lunged myself at them but Riku blocked my attack with his Way to Dawn Keyblade. I overpowered Riku but pulled back. I held Oblivion and Oathkeeper tightly. I didn't want to fight them…I just wanted Kirai back.

"Kirai! I know you're still in there!" I called out.

"You just don't learn do you? You shouldn't sympathize her: one, because you can't, you're a nobody and two, she's also a nobody! Shouldn't I have my whole self? Why should a mistake that can't feel emotions live?"

"You actually think we can't feel? I know we may not have hearts but…"

I raised my face at her,

"At least I don't act like a nobody!"

I ran towards Ren'ai to have Riku stand in my way, we exchanged blows time and time again.

Kirai's Point of View

I knew where I was, I was watching Riku and Roxas fight. I could sense Ren'ai's laughter, I could feel her withdraw her gun-sword. I knew what she was thinking, she was going to aim for Roxas. I had to stop her; I had to regain control of the body. She was lifting her gun-sword but I tried to pull down her arm. Her arm was moving up and down, and twitching.

"What the hell?" I heard her say.

I was gaining more and more control, I could move her legs, her arms. At first she resisted but then I was in control now. I opened my eyes and saw where I was standing. How could I return to being myself? There was only one way, to open Ren'ai's heart to darkness.

It was either she or I. I could stay in her body or I could turn her into a heartless and regain myself once again.

I chose me.

Ren'ai was fighting with me for the body. We fell to the ground and I screamed out. Riku came running to Ren'ai's side, I saw him staring at me. The clouds had covered the sun but the light bothered my eyes.

"Kirai?" he asked.

Before he could react, I grabbed Riku's Keyblade and thrust it when Ren'ai's heart was. At first I felt pain but then darkness engulfed me. It felt as if I had fallen asleep. When I awoke, I was in a dark room. There was a dim light above my head but other than that, darkness was surrounding me. I looked at myself and saw that I had an organization cloak on. I felt my hair and saw that it was red. I had returned and regained my body.

I walked around the room yelling Roxas's name. Where was I anyway? Where was Ren'ai? Or…what was left of her anyway. There was no one in the room and it seemed that the darkness kept on going. I tried to summon a portal but I couldn't. What was wrong with me?

I sat under the light for what seemed like ages. Where was everyone? Where was I! I had sunken to the floor, waiting for someone to rescue me. When I recollected what I had done, I realized I turned Ren'ai into a heartless. I didn't feel guilty of what I have done, but that's probably because I don't have a heart to feel guilty with. Could I steal Ren'ai's heart? No, that would be wrong. But is anything wrong in a war of life and death?

I sighed, waiting for someone to save me, for someone to tell me it was all right. Would anyone come though? Or would I rot here, wherever I was. Then I heard a small noise. It sounded like someone was walking towards me. I stood up, ready to face whomever it was. I relaxed because Axel came out of the shadows.

He held that calm expression on his face as he always does.

"Kirai! Long time no see."

I wasn't exactly happy to see him but Axel hadn't betrayed me or anything. So I said hello to him and began to sit down again.

"Kirai…I'm here to help you. Xemnas…he has plans for you and Roxas."

I looked up at him, confused.

"What do you mean?"

"He's going to USE you Kirai. You and Roxas."

"Use me?"

Axel scoffed, "Wow you are dumb."

I ignored his rude comment and asked him what Xemnas had planned.

Axel responded, "I really don't know exactly what he wants to do but it won't be good for either of you."

I stayed silent, what could I say? I wanted life to be easier, but that would never happen. Not when you're a nobody.

'Roxas...Where are you? I miss you...'