Disclaimer: I do not own Kuroshitsuji, it is the intellectual property of Toboso Yana.

Thanks Hikari-Hikaru-Hikari for betaing this fanfic for me! ^^

– D e m o n ' s _ H e a r t –

I would rather you tear my heart out.

The quiet breathing of the young earl was like a lullaby for the demon. The soft touch of his skin recalling the centuries of fatigue in his ancient spirit, like a droplet of morning dew that plunged into the basin of a prehistoric lake... When was the last time he truly felt this serene and peaceful?

'And how long is this peacefulness going to last?'

A dull pang throbbed in that certain spot again.

The right thing to do was to let go. But an invisible force was pulling him in, and the worst thing was his unwillingness to fight back. What if this was the last time he would be able to have the young master this close to him? Even if it's only for a few more seconds (and truthfully, what does a few seconds matter in an immortal life?)... With the young boy in his arms, Sebastian almost felt fulfilled, completed... A mystical sort of feeling that he's never felt before — not when he had murdered thousands of innocent souls, not when he was on a bloody killing spree...

''Let go...'

"Sebastian..." the young boy muttered in his sleep, stirring in his butler's embrace. His expression still peaceful, as if he was the Ciel from all those years ago, from before all the horrible misfortune that befell him.

Somehow, Sebastian knew, in his master's heart, there was a place for him. The demon didn't know what to make of this fact... Was he supposed to be happy? If he were, then the weight on his chest that was suffocating him insidiously was proving otherwise... But nonetheless, his body was unwilling to let go of the the person beneath him.

"Young master, what have you done to me?" Sebastian whispered softly to the slumbering boy.

Finally sitting up, the demon caressed his master's rosy cheeks, the warmth of Ciel still lingering on his body. He pressed one last kiss to the boy's forehead, then left the bedroom quietly.

As Sebastian walked through the halls, the realization of how foolishly he had acted began to sink in. What on earth was he thinking? Has he finally gone mad like the Undertaker?

The butler went back to the bathroom to pick up his master's eye-patch and his gloves; the pieces of clothing mingled together; black on white and white allowed black to be tangled within... For unknown reasons the sight annoyed Sebastian. He hurriedly put his white gloves back on, covering the manifestation of his covenant with his young master on his left hand, then stuffed the eye-patch in his pocket, mindlessly caressing the silken material as his mind sank into an introspective mode.

In situations such as these, when the demon begins to feel lust for the person whom he entered a contract with, the clever choice would be to employ seduction... However, Sebastian couldn't bring himself to do it. If he was able to, he would have done it in the bedroom earlier... Something just didn't feel right. He was sure he desired his master's body, and quite frankly, as a demon, he felt no shame in admitting it; but... Ciel's soul, it's what he truly desired — he did not wish to corrupt it; or rather, he knew he was unable to. To be honest, he did not know what he wanted anymore.

Absentmindedly, Sebastian's gloved hand went up to clutch at that sore spot on his chest. How he wished he could just tear his heart out... but that would make a truly unsightly mess.

As he passed by the male servants' quarters, he opened the door slightly, taking a peek inside. Finnian was sleeping soundly and the other two servants were also fast asleep. Sebastian closed the door back up and headed towards his own private quarter.

The butler pulled off his jacket and hung it up on the wall as a habit, then slumped down on his bed. He was tired, an exhaustion he had not felt for a long time. The demon was sure if he were to fight an angel, he would not feel this tired afterward. It felt as if something dreadful was eating him from the inside out, consuming his heart and soul bit by bit.

Maybe he should just go to sleep for once; maybe when he wakes up tomorrow the horrible feeling will be gone...

Gloved fingers worked over his necktie, loosening the piece of clothing. Sebastian unbuttoned his shirt and vest, just enough to make him feel comfortable while breathing. Human attire is truly complicated and unnecessary.

Lying on his bed half-dressed, Sebastian tried to clear his mind. However, when his lids came down, all he could see was the image of his lovely young master, asking him to hold him... As if acting of its own accord, one of his hands reached down to release the growing bulge in his trousers. Cool, slender fingers wrapped tightly around his own throbbing arousal, gently toying with the heated piece of flesh.

'Only once... and no more.'

The demon began to pleasure himself, running his other hand over his own body with the intimacy and familiarity a lover would. He found himself more aroused than ever thinking of the lovely face of his young master. He took a firm grip of his cock and squeezed tightly, euphoria running through his every vein, making his cold blood boil.

Sebastian attempted to keep his mouth shut and refrained from making any noise; he sucked in gulps and gulps of air, hoping to stop himself from calling out — but it was no use — tiny moans escaped his lips and he soon found himself groaning in an animalistic manner.

'I have never been this hard before.' The thought scared him, but he was unable to contain his desire for release any longer.

"Young master... young master, young master..." the demon kept chanting and chanting in a low voice as he worked over his shaft at a steadily increasing pace, as if it were a spell that could summon the young boy to his side.

Porcelain skin that radiates a welcoming warmth, deep blue eyes that throw him into the oblivion of pleasure... He could almost see it, he could almost feel it, he could almost taste it... The way his young master would say his name with those sweet lips of his...

"Ah- Ciel!"

Sebastian groaned and cried out the name he was forbidden to use, mind still muddled in his high, intoxicated by his own fantasies. Hot liquid ran down his icy hand like boiling lava... The sensation almost felt like bliss, if it wasn't for the guilt that was gradually sinking in...

Sebastian lay motionless in his bed, the relief that pleasure had offered slowly dying away; now he could only feel the void in his chest growing stronger than ever; the guilt of having thought of his young master while pleasuring himself tortured him... How pathetic had he become by doing this? His mind revolved around the same question over and over: 'What has happened to me?'

Ciel had the most peculiar dream last night, which made it impossible for him to go back to sleep. He tossed and turned on his huge bed, his body screaming for something — something that he knew not the name of. He had dreamt of things that he'd never thought he would dream of — things that involved his demonic butler.

He had opened his eyes to his dim bedroom, the weak light of daybreak slipping through his curtains. It was not time for him to be awake yet, but the recollections of last night's dream made it impossible for him to close his eyes again. It had felt so real and... well, intense! He was sure the part where Sebastian kissed him tenderly and hugged him tightly was reality... Although he was feeling extremely tired after that visit from that old hag Devoureaux... Ciel knew his butler had kissed him, even though it was unbelievable that they had done such things; he knew it happened, and he was sure of it... But the dream that followed...

He had dreamt of himself touching his butler's most private parts, Sebastian's pleasured screams filling his ears — "Young master... young master..." It almost drove the boy to insanity. They had even kissed in the dream; the hungry gaze that his butler had given him, it almost made Ciel feel like Sebastian wanted to devour his soul once their lips were locked; yet he couldn't resist, he knew he wanted it... just as desperately as his butler did in his dream...

When his mind went over these images, Ciel found the lower region of his pubescent body beginning to grow hot and painful once more... It had gone away gradually last night while he was lying awake in bed, but that bothersome feeling is coming back to haunt him again!

Ciel had no idea what on earth he was supposed to do to make, well, to make that go away. He wished he could ask someone, but who could give him an answer without laughing at him? An unpleasant image of the Undertaker entered his head... No! If he were ever to ask anyone, it would surely notbe that horrid man! But frankly, the pride of the little earl would not allow him to ask anybody questions on such embarrassing subjects.

Besides, how on earth was he supposed to explain to someone that he had dreamt of, out of all people, his butler? It was an abomination. What was worse — they were both male! Had it been a maid that he had dreamt of, it would still be quite reasonable... but a male servant... and a demonic one at that!

Ciel lay awake in his bed, thinking over and over.

The sun crawled higher and higher while the boy waited for his arousal to go away. However when the clock struck eight, his body still refused to cooperate, leaving him feeling more frustrated and desperate.

It's already time for Sebastian to come up and wake him... Ciel's head spun and spun, trying to come up with a way to hide this disaster from his devious butler. He was sure Sebastian was going to make fun of him — Ciel was young, but he was not ignorant; he knows he has an 'erection'.

He remembered from somewhere that it's normal for young boys to experience such physiological phenomenon... However, he also knew that Sebastian was not going to look at it the same way; the demon must have been waiting for this moment all along, ready to pull those tart and racy comments out of his sleeve and use them upon his poor, confused young master. Alas! This was no time to dwell upon what a spiteful character his demon butler had! Sebastian's footsteps were approaching, Ciel could clearly hear them almost at the door —

"Sebastian! This is an order," Ciel said loud and clear, making sure that his butler could hear him through the mahogany double door.. "Do not enter my room! Leave this instant!" Ciel was glad that his voice did not falter and was rather firm and harsh. It sounded just as a confidant master should.

The demon stood at the door, his gloved hand on the handle. He was shocked at the boy's outrage, and did not understand why his young master was banishing him from the bedroom. Has he found out about how he feels? But how?

"But young master-"

"I said leave! Leave this instant!" the panicky young boy repeated loudly, suddenly afraid that the demon already knew his situation and would barge in to tease him.

"Understood." Sebastian let go of the door handle and replied solemnly, then turned around and left without another protest.

The boy behind those double doors was relieved. That was close! Now all he needed was to concentrate on taking care of the business at hand... He needed to get rid of this quickly, otherwise Sebastian would suspect him... It was rather strange that the demon left without another word... That was not like him at all, but it could just as well be his "butler's aesthetics" to follow every command without protest. Therefore, Ciel did not think of the matter any further.

The young earl swung his feet down the side of his large bed and slid down. It felt rather strange to walk with that certain part of your body standing up... Ciel couldn't help but blushed even though he was utterly alone in his bedroom. He didn't even dare look down, yet he knew something under his night shirt was poking out awkwardly... If he could get himself to the bathroom unnoticed, all would be well — that was the plan — to soak himself in a tub of cold water so that that piece of flesh would cool down and become normal again.

Ciel was sure his plan would work, and he was determined to keep this morning's incident a secret from all but himself.

A/N: Thank you for all the favs and alerts and reviews! They mean a lot to me :) Much love to those of you who tell me what you love about my story, they are lovely comments to read! Especially Orlyzara's review, your comment on the cake part made me smile XD. Dear, are you British? You sound so very British XD. And I love you for that. ^^

I have been getting positive reviews here and on dA and on the black butler forum, thank you for everyone who is supporting and liking this fic :D