No copyright intended, all credit given to Stephenie Meyer, the creator of these characters.
I'm just having a little fun with the plot.

Edward

Another minute.

Another moment I could have spent caressing Bella's soft skin, telling her how much she meant to me… I would have held her forever, never leaving her side… not for hunting, not for anything. I would have-

The phone in my pocket rang, snapping me out of my reverie.

I made no attempt to answer it. I wasn't about to come out from my cocoon from the world. At least here I could remember Bella. There was always the aftermath of pain, though. All the time, a constant battle raging in my head.

Dream of the life I'd never have and feel excruciating pain, or try not to dream of the life I'd never have and still feel excruciating pain?

I had no choice any more though, of course, my choices were limited from the very moment I'd met Bella. I physically could not stop thinking about her. My mind was simply too wide. Even if I tried not to think about her, I still would be, and that would still cause me that agonizing throbbing inside my chest, in the hole where my heart used to be.

Again it rang. My brow furrowed in frustration. I thought about seeing who was distracting me from being with Bella, but the tone stopped.

It rang again. I uncurled from my tight ball, removing my arms from around my legs and sat up. I took my phone from my pocket, looking at who was trying to contact me.

Jasper.

Why was Jasper ringing me? He knew I wasn't going to come back anytime soon—if at all.

Again it rang, I sighed and steadied myself, closing my eyes to the world and trying to forget everything to do with the dream of being with Bella.

I flipped up the screen.

"Jasper, what's wrong?" I grimaced; even to me, my voice sounded dead, and I knew it wouldn't go unnoticed.

"Edward, go back to Forks now."

Alice? I sighed. She knew even better I wasn't going back. Not soon… only when I felt that I had done a good enough job on staying away from Bella would I permit myself to see her from a distance.
Something she'd seen must have worried her… to do with Bella? I stiffened.

Stay calm. "Alice we've been through this. I'm not going back. We've done enough damage—"

"Well at the moment that doesn't matter, because if you don't get back Bella is going to be writhing in pain alone for days. Go. Back."

The world slowed around me. Time stopped, and when it restarted, I regretted it.
I opened my eyes and instantly understood what she was saying—but it wasn't true.
She was lying, surely. Why would Alice lie like that? She was wrong, this time she was…

I tried to deny it, yet the truth of it was overwhelming.

Alice wouldn't lie. Of all of my family, I felt I had the strongest bond with her. Seeing the future and hearing thoughts wasn't easy. We were the freaks amongst the freaks, and we stuck together. Even Rosalie wouldn't sink that low to try and get me to return home.
So she was telling the truth? Bella was really… changing?

No, no, no.

And I was sitting here doing nothing, while she burned. I stood and ran, taking a moment to find my bearings.

"Where?" I snarled. All I felt was on overwhelming anger. Someone had attacked her. Someone had harmed Bella, and they would die for it. I would make sure they suffered the worst fate possible, only allowing them to die once they were truly begging for death.

"In the meadow. Laurent got her. He's gone now, but I didn't see what happened to him."

Laurent? He attacked Bella?

I should never have trusted him. I believed that he had changed. He had gone to live with Tanya and Kate… why didn't they mention, at least, that one of their acquaintances was murdering innocent humans? My mind was still clouded with rage to understand what had happened. Alice didn't see what had happened to him? It didn't matter. I would make sure he was found and kill him.

"Alice." I whispered. I couldn't hide the pain in my voice, it overwhelmed me. "How long has she got..?"

"About three da—"

The phone went dead. Only when I looked down did I see I'd accidently crushed it in my hand with the feeling of sorrow that was threatening to burst out of my chest.
I didn't need any more directions, I knew exactly which way to go and how long I'd take; I'd thought of taking the path back far too many times to count, even for me.

Bella. Three days of torture. And an eternity of regret.

Finally being able to let the charade fall away, I felt my speed decreasing from the ragged breaths I was pulling through my teeth. My whole body was shaking as I let the realisation sink in deeper, knowing it was all my fault… again…

I would've stopped; collapsed. But I kept my pace steady. Bella needed me.

We left her; to protect her... now it was worthless. I should have left sooner… I never should have turned to her, in that small room where her fate was doomed to mix with mine; never spoken. If I'd kept my mouth shut she would stay human. If I knew the catastrophe I would cause on her life, I would have gladly left her earlier, before I knew her…

And now, all that time, I had left her alone… with no one…

And now she was burning.

I already knew what was happening to her; the pain she was in right now.

I was a curse on her life. Why was Bella's life being destroyed? Why not mine, instead of hers?

Perhaps my life was already too broken. I was useless. Simply pitying myself somewhere where I happened to stop before breaking down from the pain of knowing I would never again see the one I felt destined to spend forever with.

But she could not be doomed to eternity as a creature of the dark. She was supposed to live out her life happily with someone human. She deserved so much more than what I had to offer.

I had tried to stay away from human civilisation. Frozen with the thought that I might break my promise of never returning meant little hunting, and in the fragile state I was now, I didn't believe even I could stop myself if I came across the scent of spilt blood.

I was a weak, self pitying fool.

Ever since I left her, I just had one goal: make Bella safe. That consisted of staying away from her. I tried to tell myself that I was strong enough to do it, but I knew that it was almost impossible to keep the promise that would have made Bella's life one worth living.

So many times my control lapsed. I so nearly ran back, was so close to seeing her. Even thinking about returning made my cold heart swell with hope.

Trying to track Victoria, knowing that I was doing something to help Bella, made me through the day; but she was never off my mind.

I could never help wondering what she was doing, or if she'd moved on yet… I kicked myself for hoping the latter to be false. I would never want her to forget me. I would always want what was best for her, but this clashed too strongly with it. I left to save her, but I would never want her to forget the brief time we spent together.

Every night I had watched her dream of me, knowing that each moment I spent with her would cause her even more pain when I left. Yet every time she mumbled my name, I was pulled back into spending another day, another night with her. If I could have stayed, I would want her to think of nothing but me.

And now I ran. But, what would I do when I reached her? I could not save her. She was to far through the transformation…

Try to ease her comfort? What if she had moved on? What would she make of me coming back? I know that she had believed me when I told her I didn't love her. I saw it in her eyes, the last image of her I would have carried for the rest of my long life. Her eyes burning with the sorrow and pain of the lie I was telling her that would save, and now destroy, her life.

Why? Why did she believe me? I would always love her, more than anyone—more than anything! How could she believe I could survive without her? She is my reason for being, and without her, I am nothing. Knowing that she is alive was the only reason that keeps me here.

I knew that -little though I hated it, and the pain it caused to even think it- Bella would have died one day. I don't know how many times I felt like giving up, but knowing that even though life was painful, if I could just stay alive long enough to protect Bella, I could follow her when she left for the next life, even though I could not join her.

But now, now that she won't need protecting anymore, my life was worthless again. If she had moved on, and I truly would never see her again, I'm not sure what I would do. Knowing there would be no escape from the pain of living without her, an eternity of grief...

The dry landscape swept past me, every image in perfect detail, yet gone so fast it was blurred into a canvas of rocky formations. The small creatures that lived beneath the ground, or took shelter from the heat in the shadows of shrubs, cowered away from my brief presence as I passed, like every creature should.

If only Bella had feared me as these creatures did; I should have shown her what a true monster I was. If she had known… it was all my fault…

Perhaps, even if she didn't want me in the same way I longed for her, I could stay with her as a friend…

What was I thinking? Now matter how much I wanted it, it would never happen.

I know now that, once she realised that it was my fault that she was suffering the fate she is, my fault that she was alone, my fault that she would never see any of her human friends or family again, she would truly hate me.

Even if it meant that I would only see her now, while she writhed and screamed in pain, I would take it. She would not want to see me again after this. I would treasure these memories, of when I would force my presence upon her one last time.

I ran straight over the thriving life of the cities, the streets alive with the bustle of unsuspecting humans. None of them knew the devastating fate Bella had been condemned to—none of them cared.

I felt like the whole world should have stopped and grieved for the loss of Isabella Swans soul.

Even though it was daylight, it was cloudy throughout most of the country, and I was able to run across the buildings, moving too fast for human eyes to see. If it had been sunny, the reflection of my skin would have given me away, and I would have to have taken a longer route around civilisation, wasting precious moments on my journey to Forks.

All I could do was keep running. I couldn't allow Bella to burn alone, not now. This wasn't supposed to happen.

As I approached the borders of Forks, I headed straight in the direction of the meadow, knowing what was waiting for me there.

I ran into the trees, panting heavily despite not needing to breathe. The weight of knowing that she lay just through the trees almost shattered me. I was overwhelmed. I felt fury at Laurent, grief because of what was happening to Bella, yet, I felt happy to be reunited with her. Even though she was suffering so badly, I couldn't help but feel an ounce of joy for knowing I was going to see her again.

I ran straight through her scent. That did it. Although I can recall with perfect clarity the scent of Bella's skin, this new trail almost made my heart beat again and I couldn't help but smile. A motion I'd not done for so long it felt unnatural, I curled the corners of my lips upwards until it touched my eyes.

I would see Isabella Swan again.