Nikolas sat in a padded chair outside Lulu's private room at Shadybrook, doing his best to swallow his anger and his fear after watching Scott Baldwin railroad and berate his baby sister. Lulu had been frozen like a deer caught in the headlights, her doe eyes wavering as she stared at Johnny. Flashes of watching Laura breakdown washed over him like a bitter enemy he hoped to never meet again. It had been difficult going through this the first and second times but experiencing this with Lulu was even harder. He had saved her life once when she was just a baby, and now he was going to have to do it all over again. If only he had moved a little faster, she would have already been in Switzerland. If only he had gone to Jason sooner. There were so many things he should have done, but now, he just needed to make sure that she was okay.
Having Nadine there for most of the trial had been probably the only sanity he had in the midst of such an awful situation for Nikolas' entire family. She had sat by his side the entire time, offering to be his sounding board when he needed to rant and carefully giving her advice when she knew that he was acting rash. After she had testified on the stand and Scott had put their entire relationship on display, he was sure that she would have stayed away from the courthouse. However, she was just as determined as ever to stand by his side and make sure that he was okay.
"Well, Lulu is finally resting," Lainey announced as she closed the door behind her. Nikolas peaked over the psychologist's doctor to see his sister curled up in a ball on her bed. She looked so young and little. "She is just as adamant as ever about convincing Scott Baldwin that she did this. It's going to take some intensive therapy to get her through these next few weeks."
"Whatever it takes," Nikolas retorted immediately, his brow wrinkled in concern. Money was no object here, he would do anything that he needed to do to make sure that Lulu was okay. "I'll bring in whatever specialists you recommend. We can take her to whatever clinics. Anything Lu needs, you just name it and I will make sure that she gets it. I want to do everything in my power to make sure that she gets the help that she needs. If there is even the slightest chance that she can make a full recovery, I will consider it time and money well spent."
The pretty doctor smiled at him appreciatively. She had seen his generosity firsthand through her friendship with Emily and in her many dealings with him when it came to his mother. It was only natural that he would extend that same devotion to his baby sister. She just hoped that her friend was getting the same treatment. "There are some people that we can talk with. I know that you all called in a few specialists from Europe when your mother was first diagnosed," she said. "I think that we should consider brining them in again since they have prior knowledge of family history. There is also a doctor that I worked with in San Francisco that is a well-known expert in the field."
Nikolas tapped the names of the doctors into his BlackBerry so that he would be able to make contact with them at the beginning of the week. He also listened as Lainey recommended a few facilities he could get in touch with in case they needed to get her out of Port Charles. "I actually have a few questions I would like to ask you about Lulu's diagnosis…" He was suddenly cut off by the impolite buzzing of his phone from his pocket. Pulling it back out, he glanced down at the screen. Not recognizing the number, he answered it cautiously in case it was someone in the media. "Nikolas Cassadine."
"Nikolas, it's Elizabeth," his friend said on the other end of the line. Her voice was breathy, as if she had been running. He could also detect the concern and anxiety in her tone, even with the mere three words she had spoken. "There was an explosion at the clinic."
Elizabeth's words echoed over and over again in his ears. All he could think about was the months of work that had gone into building the free clinic in Emily's honor. He remembered how wonderful it had felt when they held the dedication ceremony. He remembered what good it felt when they treated their first patient. He had fought hard with the mayor to get the permits pushed through and then to open the doors. The counterfeit drugs had nearly shut him down. He had overcome so much. They all had – everyone there, especially Nadine. Now, that was all taken away from them. It had literally gone up in flames. Just as he was about to ask what the estimated damage was, it occurred to him that she hadn't mentioned that it was empty. "Who was inside?"
Even before she said it, Nikolas knew the answer. "Matt Hunter was found unconscious on the floor. It appears that someone knocked him out. He was brought in for blunt trauma to the head, internal bleeding and smoke inhalation," she told him. He could hear by the background sounds that she was at the hospital. He could also hear that there was something that she wasn't telling him.
"Who found him?"
Stretching her pause out for as long as she could, Elizabeth wracked her brain for a way to tell Nikolas that she had been there. Somehow she knew that he knew, but he still needed to hear the words from him. "She's here, Nikolas. You need to get here now. She needs you."
He didn't even bother to say goodbye when he hung up the phone. Without even explaining to Lainey, he shoved his phone back in his pocket and took off into a full sprint toward the parking garage. He could hear the echoes of his shoes pounding on the cement as he came upon his car. He suddenly wished that he had his driver because the last thing he needed to be doing right now was driving. However, thinking about Nadine alone in the hospital, he didn't really care. He just wanted to get there as quickly as he could. It was only a matter of seconds before he had started the engine and pulled out onto the busy boulevard. He didn't even bother to look for oncoming traffic. He just needed to get there.
The entire drive over to General Hospital was spent praying silently to God, calling on every favor he had with his guardian angel and asking Emily to watch over Nadine for him. He drove erratically, tailgating whenever a car in front of him dared to drive the speed limit. He didn't think he had ever used the horn as much as he did in those few short blocks to the hospital. Every light seemed to be red, but he didn't care. He just disregarded them as he zoomed through the busy intersections. He had to get to her. He couldn't lose someone else. He couldn't lose her.
"Where is she?" he screamed a few minutes later as he came bounding off the elevator and into the packed emergency room. Epiphany Johnson looked up from the nurse's station and said something to one of the other nurses before coming out to talk to him. Her brown eyes were masked with concern as she grabbed his elbow and ushered him into a private room. "Please, where is Nadine?"
"Mr. Cassadine, Nurse Crowell is getting ready to go into surgery. I am going to page Nurse Webber to come sit with you. She will explain everything or at least as much as she can," Epiphany promised. "And I give you my word that Nadine is going to get the best medical care possible. We take care of our own. Patrick Drake is the attending surgeon, and I am going to scrub in myself. Just say a prayer."
Nikolas hated the nurse for her calm temper and unwavering faith. He didn't want a lot of empty promises, he just wanted answers. He wanted to know who had done this, why it had happened, what was going on with Nadine, what was going to happen to her, how he hadn't seen this coming… The questions were infinite, but only one answer really mattered. He just needed to know where she was. He wanted to see her for himself. He wanted to stroke her hair, look into her eyes, hold her hand, kiss her, anything. He just wanted to be with her.
Five minutes after Epiphany had left him alone, a worn Elizabeth came busting through the door. She wordlessly wrapped her arms around Nikolas, noting how tense he was. His jaw was set in fierce determination, his demeanor disconnected. There were no tears in his eyes. He was cold and distant, almost like he was trying to force himself to hold it together until he knew. "Nikolas, Nadine is in surgery now. I walked down with her myself. She was unconscious but breathing on her own."
One by one, he began to ask his questions. He found out that Nadine had gone into help get Matt out of the clinic when the roof had collapsed on top of her. She had been knocked unconscious when a sizable beam crushed against her right temple, sending her across the concrete floor. Lucky was on the scene investigating and had promised to call his ex-wife as soon as he knew anything. They were doing surgery on Nadine to help stop the internal bleeding and to repair her punctured lung. There was a lot more to her condition, but Nikolas had phased out somewhere near the middle. The only thing he could think about was her waking up again.
They sat together like that in the waiting room for the next two hours, neither of them saying more than a few words. Elizabeth left once to retrieve a cup of coffee for him, which he never drank. The only phone call Nikolas accepted was one from Wyndamere so that he could check on Spencer and to ask Alfred to call Lesley to come get him for the night. Mostly, he just stared at the floor, his hands bent in silent prayer, as he tapped his toe. He tried to remember all the little things about her that always made him smile. He tried to believe that everything was going to be okay. He tried to ignore the nagging voice in the back of his head that wanted to remind him that this always happens to the Cassadines. He tried to hold back the tears threatening to fall at any moment.
Finally, Elizabeth's pager blared and she nodded at him once. He silently followed her out of the room and into the quiet corridors that led to the recovery rooms. Patrick was standing outside a room at the end of the hall with Robin, both of their heads bent over a clipboard of charts. Epiphany was next to them, nodding as she made notations on clipboard of her own. Their faces were grave and serious, completely devoid of any positive indicators.
"Nikolas," Robin announced, clearing her voice so that Epiphany and Patrick both looked up to politely regard the man. "Patrick and I wanted to stay here so that you could hear about Nadine's condition from us personally."
Holding up his hand, Nikolas shook his hands. "I know that I need to hear this and I really want to but unless it is life-threatening, it can wait. Is it?" When both doctors shook their heads, he smiled slightly and nodded. "Good, well, I'm sure that what you have to say matters and I need to hear it. However, I need to see her first. I need to see with my own eyes that she is fine."
Patrick started to say something when Epiphany stepped between the two men. "She's right in here, Nikolas," she told him, her voice uncharacteristically soft as she reached for his hand. He allowed her to guide him toward the room where Nadine laid lifelessly inside. He stood outside the room and watched her through the window for a moment. Her body was covered with tubes and machines chirped at her bedside. Her face was ashen with burns along her cheekbones. Her blonde hair was grimy from the smoke and her eyes were shut. He would have given anything to look into those ocean blue puddles of grace right now. "It's okay, go in. She needs you."
Letting himself into the room, Nikolas finally allowed the tears to come. Nadine was still unconscious. There were cuts and scrapes all over her skin. Her heartbeat wasn't as strong as it could have been and there were a lot of liquids hooked up to her monitors. However, she was alive. He could finally see that she was still here with him. His tears weren't those of sadness or anger or pain. They were of utter joy. He still had her. "Oh, God," he choked as he slid down on his knees beside her bed. Grabbing her hand, he brought her cool palm to his lips and kissed each knuckle. "Please, Nadine, you can't leave me. I should have been there with you. There are so many things I want to say, things I should have said…"
He had thought about saying that he loved her a million times over the past week, but the timing had never been right. They hadn't even made love yet. There were so many things they hadn't experienced together. He just wanted them to have their chance. Nadine was such a good soul. She certainly deserved more than he could ever give her, even if she believed it was everything. He loved her and now that he was ready to acknowledge that, he could lose her. He couldn't lose her. He wouldn't lose her. He'd fight this for her. He wasn't sure how he could do that but he would try. He needed to do something so that he didn't feel helpless or hopeless. He just wished that she would wake up and tell him what that thing was.
He knew that Robin, Patrick, Epiphany and Elizabeth were still watching him through the window but he didn't care. He didn't care about anything or anyone other than what was going on in that room. Lulu wasn't even on his mind as he knelt on the floor next to that bed. It was just her. It was just Nadine. He took her hand again and folded it together with his until they were clasped tightly in prayer. He began to recite every prayer he could remember, even ones from other religions and faiths. Then, he stood up, leaned over and pressed his ear to her heart. As long as he could hear that beat, he wouldn't slip under again. He could fight the darkness. He could be strong for her. He had found his way to fight. He would guide her back into the light.