"Is that really what you want?"

Nikolas turned back around and looked at Nadine. Tears were welling in her eyes as she clutched her hands tightly in her lap. "No, of course not," he answered before opening his own door. He didn't even bother to shut it as he pulled her door open and reached out to envelope her in his arms. They were both crying, neither exactly sure of why, as they clung to one another. "I'm sorry. I don't know what happened back there. I didn't mean anything that I said."

She wanted to believe what he said, but history had taught Nadine to tread lightly when she was feeling emotionally vulnerable to anyone. "I don't want to fight with you, Nikolas, but you can't cage me in," she explained to him through the tears. "I've been on my own for a very long time. I don't respond well to having to answer to someone. I know that I shouldn't have reacted like that, but a part of me thought that was the only way I was going to get through to you. It's like we've said before – I don't need you in my life but I want you there."

Running his hands over her back, Nikolas nodded slowly as he looked into her eyes. He wasn't used to having to change for someone else, but she was worth changing for. "If I agree to give you some space and respect your freedom, can you do me a favor?" he asked. Nadine told him that she would at least try. "Please don't threaten to leave me like that if I am doing something you don't like. Yell at me, fight with me, do whatever you want. Just don't say that you won't be with me. I know that's not what you were saying exactly, but I could see a glimmer of that threat there. I can handle anything you throw my way, but I won't go through that. I've seen the slow destruction of many relationships. It's not something I care to live through again."

"I can do that," she vowed confidently before arching her back in a deep yawn. Arguing with Nikolas had taken a lot out of her physically and emotionally. "Hey, that was our first fight."

"Yes, it was," Nikolas whispered into her ear. Trailing his fingers through her blonde hair, he leaned forward and planted a long, lazy kiss on her lips. Nadine moaned happily against his mouth as he deepened the kiss. Her hands roamed over his sculpted back before coming to a rest in his belt loops. "That was our first makeup."

Smiling against his mouth, she pulled back and searched his dark eyes. "I am pretty sure that Dr. Drake told us to abstain from physical activity," she told him pointedly, her hands on her hips. "For someone who is supposed to be taking care of me, you're not doing a very good job at following the rules."

"And to think, I am known for my obedience and respect for authority," he mocked. Nadine punched his shoulder playfully as he stood up. He reached down and brushed the dust off his designer trousers. "Just so you know, I wouldn't get down on my knees on a dirty road for just any girl. You must be special."

"Most be," she murmured to herself as he jogged around to the driver's side of the car. Nadine felt like a passenger in a chauffeured car from the backseat. However, it would be too difficult to move her just so that she could feel just a little less awkward about her new position in life. "Do you think Elizabeth and Lucky will forgive us and still come to dinner if I call and ask nicely?"

"They've forgiven me for a lot more," Nikolas assured her as he pulled his cell phone from his pocket. It only took two minutes of conversation to convince his brother to bring Liz and the boys to Spoon Island. After he'd hung up, Nikolas turned around in his seat and looked at Nadine. "Now that's taken care of, why don't we get you home?"

On the drive over to Wyndamere, Nadine thought a lot about that word, "home." As long as she lived, she wasn't sure that she could ever refer to that mausoleum as a home. She loved the sprawling estate on Spoon Island, so full of light and greenery. However, she had a hard time getting used to the gothic carvings, secret corridors and dark tapestries that dominated Wyndamere. There were parts of it that were brighter, like Spencer's bedroom and the playroom. However, the rest of it felt so oppressing, filled with doom and gloom.

When Nikolas finally reached the long and winding driveway that led to his house, Nadine had her face pressed to the window. There were bright red and purple ribbons tied to every tree and matching balloons on every fence post. When he pulled up to the garage, the entire house staff was standing outside holding a large canvas banner proclaiming, "Welcome, Nadine!" Maybe she had discounted Wyndamere too early. She had forgotten that it was the people that made a house a home.

She giggled like a little girl on her birthday as she watched Spencer run up to her door. "Oh, Spencer," she gushed as she opened the door and the little boy crawled into her lap. Nikolas was right behind him, trying to convince him to wait and reminding him that Nadine was still hurt. Both of them ignored Nikolas as Spencer buried his face in Nadine's shoulder. "I missed you so much."

"I missed you, too!" Spencer exclaimed as he hugged Nadine tightly. She smiled up at Nikolas over his son's shoulder. His eyes were shining with pride and something else. She wasn't sure exactly what it was. "Daddy, look, Nadine is home!"

"I know, buddy, I picked her up," Nikolas reminded him patiently as he pried the little boy from her lap. Spencer hugged his father briefly before squirming from his arms to go into the house. "There is cake waiting in there, to be fair. You held his attention a lot longer than most people would have."

Reaching her hand out, she allowed Nikolas to lift her from the car. Clinging tightly to his arm, she was determined to make it inside on her own. Their steps were slow and sporadic, and she had to stop more than once to rest. However, after a few minutes, they managed to come into the sitting room so that she could collapse on the couch. Alfred appeared to ask if she needed anything, but Nikolas quickly brushed him off. Shutting the double doors to the sitting room, he shut away the rest of the world so that there was only him. Somewhere in the distance, she could hear Spencer's nanny taking him upstairs for his afternoon nap. He seemed to go begrudgingly once the kind woman promised that he would get to have dinner with Nadine and his father when he woke up again.

Nikolas listened to his messages while he watched Nadine try to get comfortable on the couch. Once he had jotted a few reminders on his notepad, he replaced the receiver and went over to join her on the sofa. "Are you tired? I could take you upstairs to your room if you wanted to get some rest," he offered. She shook her head no. "Well, if you change your mind, let me know."

"Actually, I just want to sit with you here for a little bit," she decided as she looped her arm through his. Nikolas leaned his head against hers as she yawned. Nikolas soon followed with a deep yawn of his own. "Sounds like I'm not the only one who's tired."

"I really haven't been sleeping well given our schedule," he admitted as he brushed his hand wearily over his face. "I know that you won't go upstairs and sleep, but could I talk you into taking a nap with me down here? I kind of got used to sleeping with you when I'd sneak out to the hospital. This couch is about as big as your bed was."

Nadine tried to hide her smile at his adorable request. "I don't know, Nikolas," she hesitated. "I mean, Spencer could walk in and find us. How would you explain that to him?"

"We're going to have to have that talk eventually. He knows that you mean something to me, Nadine. I don't think that is exactly a secret anymore," he acknowledged. "I've had some time to think about it and he should know."

"I agree," she concurred, "but I'm not sure that he needs to find out this way. This has been a confusing few months for him, between losing Emily and your illness and everything with Lulu. I don't want our relationship to be just one more thing that he doesn't get. I want us to do it the right way."

He reached over suddenly and cupped her face to bring her to him for a long kiss. After he had lost Emily, Nikolas had resigned himself to raising Spencer alone. He never imagined that he could find anyone worthy of being a mother to his son once they'd already had to say goodbye to Courtney and Emily. Now, with Nadine, he got little flashes of the future and he could imagine the three of them together. He could see them as a family. The thought both scared and exhilarated him. It was moving too fast to even go there, but somewhere in the back of his mind, he knew that was part of what he was looking for. He and Spencer were a package deal, and whoever loved him had to love his son. Nikolas knew that Nadine loved Spencer. In fact, he'd almost wager that she had fallen in love with his little boy before she had fallen in love with him.

"Thank you for caring about Spencer enough to want that. You're right. I should have thought this through some more," he decided. "I just wanted to make earlier up to you. I was an ass."

Nadine shrugged coyly and smiled at him over your shoulder. "Thankfully for you, I happen to like your ass," she teased. "Anyhow, I didn't say that I wouldn't take a nap with you. I just don't think that we should do it down here. If you want to take me upstairs to my room, I think I could be persuaded to let you join me."

"We could go to my room," he offered. "I have the biggest bed in the house. There would be plenty of room for you to sprawl out."

Looking down at her hands, she shook her head no silently. "We're not ready for that."

"It's just a nap. We're going to sleep."

"I know, but that's where you slept. With her. I just think that we need to slow it down a little bit. I appreciate that you want to hold me in your bed, but we're not there yet," she told him. "Can you honestly tell me you are ready to have me in the same room you shared with Emily? To hold me in the same bed where you slept with her? I already feel her everywhere I go in this house. I need to get used to feeling like that before I'm ready for that."

Honestly, Emily hadn't even popped into his mind when he had asked her to come upstairs to his room. He actually just wanted them to both have enough space to be comfortable. It was the first time he had made a choice this big without thinking about Emily first. That spoke to him. "We have all the time that you need. There is no rush," he promised as he stood up. He offered his hand to Nadine, who used it as leverage to lift herself from the couch. Leaning against him support, she allowed him to bring her to the back staircase so that she could make her way to the second floor. It was a long and slow process, but they eventually managed to make it to the top step. "I thought that you would be most comfortable in the rooms right at the top of the landing. I'm just down the hall across from Spencer."

Opening the door to the expansive suite immediately across from the staircase, Nadine felt all breath rush out of her body. Unlike the dark rooms downstairs, her chosen trio of rooms were flooded with sunny light and radiant warmth. A large canopy bed covered in fine white gauze was situated in the middle of the room with two matching cherry nightstands on either side. Across the room, there was a lit vanity with a big mirror and a small writing desk. One side of the room opened up to a bathroom with a claw foot bath tub while the other led to a sitting room with overstuffed chairs. "This is beautiful," Nadine mused as she looked around. She spotted the framed photographs from her apartment on the mantle of the fireplace. "It's absolutely perfect."

"This was my mother's quarters," he told her. Since Laura had gone inside herself, he hadn't allowed anyone to stay here. However, he knew that he wanted Nadine to spend her days in these rooms as soon as he had thought about asking her to stay with him. "She designed the entire thing herself when we redid Wyndamere after I took over the estate. I had her, Lulu and Lucky each do a suite. I wanted to make sure that they always have somewhere to come home to if they ever need it. Elizabeth also has one in the other wing with adjacent quarters for the boys and a playroom."

She understood immediately the significance of being in these rooms. This had been Laura's home away from home – a place that he clearly valued. "Nikolas, I love…" her voice trailed off. She was just about to say that she loved him when the words got caught in her throat. "I love it. The light in here is amazing."

He would have sworn that she was about to say something else before she stopped. For a minute, he had found himself hoping that she would tell him that she loved him. When she didn't, he was left feeling disappointed. It was crazy to let so much hinge on three little words but it always did. "Yeah, my mom loves the sun," he explained. "She and Lulu both made sure that their rooms got a lot of light. Lucky's is simple and earthy, kind of like him. Elizabeth's is warm and inviting. I guess that the spaces reflect who they are. I like that. When I get a little lonely for one of them, I can just go sit in there and I feel like they're with me. Especially this room, you know? It's nice to have a part of my mom with me."

"All this talk of your mom makes me not want to go to bed with you," she taunted, her voice dropping to a sultry tone. "I mean, I had all these naughty intentions until we got up here."

"You know, I'd believe that if you hadn't reminded me about Patrick's orders like an hour ago. Keep teasing me like that and I'm just going to have to retaliate," he warned her. "Trust me; I can be quite relentless when it comes to getting what I want."

"Oh, so you want me?"

"Only as much as you want me."

"So not at all then? Quite disappointing really given all the chemistry we have."

He considered the thought for a moment as he slid his hands down her shoulders to rest on her hips. Pulling her slender body flush against his, his fingers spanned over her waist. "Chemistry, really?" he murmured into her ear. "I just don't feel it."

She nearly moaned as he subtly thrust his hips into hers. "I beg to differ," she countered as she felt him brush against hers. "Nikolas, we can't."

"I know, you already told me that," he agreed as he began to nibble on her ear lobe. His lips nipped lightly at her skin before moving to place a trail of kisses behind her ear and down her neck. Brushing feathery touches over her collarbone, he started up the other side of her neck before planting small kisses behind her other ear. "I feel nothing."

"Nope, no chemistry here," she moaned as she guided his face back up to hers. She leaned in hungrily, knotting her fingers in his dark locks, as she devoured his mouth with hers. Her kiss was almost like an attack, greedy and unrelenting. He probed his tongue between her lips and wrestled with her for control. Just when one would gain a slight advantage, the other would counter fiercely. Nikolas danced her backward until the back of her knees hit against the mattress. She fell back willingly, pulling him down on top of her. He pinned her hands over her head as she moved beneath him. Just as she was about to ask for more, he pulled away. Nadine rolled away from him after a minute. "Why did you stop?"

"We have to. You could get hurt. Trust me, I really don't want to," he groaned. He was breathing heavy and had to readjust his pants to hide the uncomfortable evidence. "I think you know that. But as much as I want you, and that is a lot…a lot, I care about you more. We can't take it there until Patrick gives you the all clear."

Reaching up, Nadine smoothed her hair back into a ponytail. "I wish you weren't so damn responsible," she grumbled mockingly before crawling up to slip beneath the covers. He laughed at her before leaning forward on his knees to kiss her forehead. She pulled the corner of the quilt back, much like she had that night at the hospital when she had invited him to sleep with her. "If you're not going to let me do that, you better come and hold me. I want to get something out of this."

"You got me," he whispered as he crawled in beside her, turning so that they were both lying on their side facing the mirror. His eyes met hers in the looking glass, both of their gazes full of desire. "What more is there?"

"Nothing," she answered. "There is nothing more than us."