Sonic Insanity
Chapter 38 (three chapters from now, meaning the chapter after the chapter after next) will involve fan characters, so please submit some by review or e-mail.
Necessary info for fan characters:
Name: (this is obvious)
Species: (if it's not included in the name then write it down)
Color: (since Sonic characters are usually different colors, do that. And nothing too complex. Do not talk about their clothes or jewelry or shoes, because if you do I will intentionally put them with the wrong accessories.)
Favorite Sonic character: (who are they friends with? This can be more than one)
Least Favorite Sonic character: (enemies, can also be more than one)
Rival Character: (this one isn't required but it helps.)
General Personality: (duh)
I don't want any intricate back stories involving death and redemption and microwaves exploding. This is a humor fic, and they'll probably only appear for one chapter.
You cannot submit yourself as a fan character unless you are either (a) a human, in which case your part will probably be pretty small, or (b) your username is sort of like a Sonic character's name. So, please give me as many as I can, and I'll insert them.
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Knuckles, with a loud karate scream, flung himself across the room, vaulted over a counter, and performed a forward flip while spinning 360 degrees over the couch. He grabbed a golf club and swung it devastatingly hard into Sonic's crotch. (What a way to start a fanfic, huh?)
Sonic, predictably, began to scream and curse with white-hot intensity. "WHAT WAS THAT FOR?"
"Oh, sorry, didn't see you there," Knuckles said unconvincingly.
"DIDN'T SEE ME?" Sonic's face contorted for a full five minutes, no words escaping his lips. Then he burst. "Knuckles, I've HAD IT! There is no chance you are allowed to remain in this house if this happens again!" Knuckles' eyebrows shot up. Apparently, Sonic was being lenient by offering him a second chance.
"But still," threatened Sonic, "one more toe out of line and you're toothpicks!"
Shadow coughed out a spurt of coffee. "Did you just say 'one more toe out of line and you're toothpicks?' TOOTHPICKS?" he howled to the heavens.
"Oh yeah, that was from my old piano lessons," Sonic reminisced.
Flashback…
"Come on! Come on! Play the six notes in order!" screamed a strangely Eggman-like man as a young Sonic stumbled over the correct notes. The man removed his fake mustache, which was covering a real mustache that looked exactly like the fake one, and grinned. "Hah! The young hero will never know how I've programmed the piano to electrocute anyone who plays those six notes in that order… UNTIL IT'S TOO LATE! Ah hah ha!" Sonic played the six notes perfectly and nothing happened.
"Curses! Should have plugged in the power," seethed Eggman.
End flashback…
"My piano teacher was Eggman the whole time!" gasped Sonic. "The horror… imagine the ways he could have twisted and shaped my young, impressionable mind…"
"Sonic, he gave you piano lessons," Knuckles sneered. "All he could have done is taught you how to play the piano wrong. Secondly, how did that prove your toothpick theory?"
"Oh yeah, that was my other teacher," Sonic remembered fondly.
Another flashback…
"Play the notes! Play them! Play them!" screeched Sonic's piano teacher, smacking his student with a baseball bat while Sonic desperately tried to play. This was all during a piano recital in front of everyone, of course.
"Ow! I'm trying… it's not easy with both hands tied behind my back!" snarled Sonic.
"SILENCE! One wrong note and you're toothpicks! I kid you not… another mistakes and it's toothpicks for you!" bellowed the teacher.
Sonic, understandably, was not intimidated, but then the teacher smacked him in the face and he kept playing.
End flashback…
"Ah, good times," smiled Sonic fondly.
"Sounds awful," Shadow said, raising his eyebrow.
"Move aside, black fur!" shouted a voice, and three figures on hovering boards burst in through the wall. They were all birds. One was a green hawk, the other a purple swallow, and the last a grey albatross.
"Jet… Wave… and Storm!" roared the green one. "The Babbling Dopes… I mean, Babylon Rogues are ready for action! That loser Shadow was barely in the last game!"
"Yeah, cause I had a starring role in Shadow the Hedgehog," grinned Shadow. "I doubt even your prestigious role as sidekicks in the last game will ever get you your own entire game! You'll never see another game! You'll be relegated to the anime TV show for all eternity! The Babylon Rogues… ARE NO MORE! Mwahahahahahahaha!" Tails played some clashing thunder sound effects on his ghetto blaster, while everyone else just stared.
"Anyway," muttered Sonic nervously, "moving on…"
"The fact remains," Knuckles said, "that there's no use for you guys! I'm a much cooler power character than that overweight pigeon, Wave isn't even hot-" she glared daggers at him- "-so Rouge fills her position, and Sonic and Shadow have Jet covered pretty well! There's no use! The only place for you is the sequel to Sonic Heroes… providing there is one, of course."
"But… we're original!" protested Jet feebly. "We have attitude!"
"Not as much as me," Shadow smirked.
"We're individuals!" spat Jet. "Wave is a mechanic! Storm is stupid and clumsy! I have a rivalry with Sonic!"
"Tails is a mechanic, Big is stupid and clumsy, and Shadow also had a rivalry with Sonic," replied Knuckles patiently.
"Well, um… you see, the thing is, I'm kind of hungry…" mumbled Storm. Wave poked him in the eye with the tip of her wing.
"Maybe if I wore suspenders…" mused Jet.
"GET OUT!" screamed Sonic, shooting a flamethrower at them. It missed and most of the wall caught on fire. Knuckles spit on it and the fire was put out… oddly enough.
"How'd you do that? You can't just spit on flames to put em out!" objected Tails.
"See, if you're a pimp, spitting ain't the same," grinned Knuckles. "Being a pimp, I have a special chemical compound I spit that can do anything…"
"Tell the joke and get it over with," growled Sonic.
"I spit GAME at the fire!" smiled Knuckles. "I spit game at 'em, and those fires just can't resist! They get put out just like that!" He snapped his fingers with an explosive noise. Shadow, furious, picked up Jet and threw him at Knuckles… or he would have if Jet had still been standing there. It turned out that Wave, Storm and Jet had all left.
"Um…" said Shadow awkwardly.
"Anyhow," commented Knuckles in a very Ben Stein-like voice (just inserting the obligatory celebrity reference). "We don't really have much of a plot right now, so…"
Just as he said that, something happened that changed everything.
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Deadlines are here, so I'll have to leave you in suspense. What will change everything? Find out.