Disclaimer: Bioware owns Dragon Age, not me. I'd have sooooo much more money if I did.
AN: Today's installment takes place during Awakening, inspired by party banter between Anders and Justice.
Prompt #4: Silence
Impossible Dreamer
"Perhaps they wish the same as I: silence!"
Anders was taken aback by the tone in Justice's voice. He'd said the sentence so vehemently that even the somewhat socially deprived mage could tell he'd struck a nerve and shut his mouth with an audible snap.
It was odd, honestly. In becoming a spirit healer, he had by necessity communicated with Fade spirits before, but they weren't stunning conversationalists and didn't appear to have much of an opinion about demons one way or another. Justice seemed unique in that regard, both that he seemed to have a low opinion of his darker brethren and that he actually initiated conversation. Often eloquently, in fact. Other spirits just floated through the Fade, uncaring, sometimes speaking when spoken to, and Anders was positive the only reason some of them actually assisted him in healing was his charming nature. Anders had once thought that he was apathetic about a lot of things, but his own attitude didn't hold a candle to some of the "benevolent" Fade spirits.
Justice was different. Justice had a personality, uptight as it was. Justice cared on some level. Justice was a person.
He also currently inhabited the corpse of an accomplished warrior.
And Anders had gone ahead and tried to pump him for information about a sensitive subject as if he was some emotionless font of knowledge, a talking book that he could ask anything he liked. Maker, he felt like he'd just poked a tiger with a stick to see how the stripes would change.
Anders took a moment to closely observe the corpse his spirit acquaintance currently inhabited as they followed their Commander around Amaranthine. He (though come to think of it, Anders wasn't certain if that was technically the right pronoun to use for something that only borrowed gender) wore that body almost as though he was born to it, apart from the fact it was dead, of course. He'd seen plenty of older humans and elves who occasionally twitched as Justice sometimes did while still, but overall he handled the body with fluidity and surprising grace. Not to mention his unstoppable presence on the battlefield, where the spirit moved with a deadly speed and efficiency that Oghren couldn't even come close to matching. If Anders wasn't always so absorbed in his spells, he might consider it morbidly fascinating to watch.
They had stopped outside a shop the Commander entered and stood in tense silence for a few minutes before it was finally broken. "You are staring, mage."
Justice's voice startled Anders out of his thoughts, "I'm sorry. I thought you didn't want to speak to me."
"I have decided that your foolish banter is preferable to your gaze with undeclared intent," the spirit's voice was flat, verging on an irritated growl.
"So you're not still mad about—"
"I did not say that."
"Oh," Anders considered quickly, recognizing that he needed to mollify the spirit, and finally decided on honesty for a change, "I was only observing how well you move, since you've never had an actual body before. Your eyes blink, you gesture with your hands when you talk, everything. It's almost like you've done it before."
"I have," Justice plainly replied.
Anders' eyes shot wide open and his jaw dropped, "What? But I thought you said you've never crossed the Veil before!" The implications of that revelation alone were immediately apparent to Anders. If a spirit of justice had lied about that, what else could he have lied about? Maybe he already was—
"Don't be a fool," Justice snapped irritably, "I meant in the Fade."
The poor mage was now confused, "You possessed a dead body in the Fade?"
"No," the spirit seemed a hair's breadth from eloquently telling Anders to shut up again, but he continued, "I meant that I have emulated movements and mannerisms of mortals while I dwelt in the Fade. I would often observe mortal dreams, and it seemed right to blend in as a part of them. It required significantly more effort then, than it does now. I suspect the muscles of Kristoff's body . . . remember the motions and repeat them with little prompting."
These few sentences raised a plethora of questions in Anders' mind, but considering he didn't know how long Justice would deign to talk with him, he settled on the most interesting first. "So you've taken part in mortal dreams? I bet you're always the knight in shining armor saving the princess from the dragon." Anders barely restrained a chuckle.
"On occasion," Justice allowed, "Those would be situations in which a demon would torment a dreaming mortal in the form of a dragon. There were many other situations in which I would pass judgment or dispense justice, sometimes upon the dreamer and not their enemies. But in most, I was merely an observer."
"Aha! So you do help mortals!" Anders clung to the positive of the statement, ignoring the darker implications, and almost felt as though he'd won something. "And here I thought you said we were beyond help."
"It was not my intent to help them," Justice denied, "merely to thwart the demon preying upon them at the time. In most cases, it is the mortal dreamer who attracts the demon to that part of the Fade. To truly help them would be to stop them from gathering the demons in the first place, which is impossible."
Maybe if they didn't have bad things to dream about . . .
Anders failed to see how Justice's actions on behalf of dreamers still weren't helping, even in a small way. "I'm sure if the dreamers knew what you did for them, they would still be grateful." He felt the urge to pat the spirit on his armored shoulder, but thought better of it just as another thought struck him: "Have you ever helped me in my dreams, Justice?"
The desiccated face looked impossibly puzzled as he considered the question. "Perhaps," he answered after a few seconds of thought, "but I could not say for certain. All mortals appear the same to me. Even in your world, it is difficult for me to tell you apart."
"Even mages?" Anders couldn't help himself.
"Magic is one of the more obvious differences I am beginning to see."
"I meant in the Fade," the mage clarified.
Justice shrugged. Such a human action, and executed perfectly . . . Anders wondered how old the spirit was, that he'd gotten so much practice at such movements, or if they were more a product of Kristoff's muscle memory than he had implied. If that was the case, how much of Justice's personality was Kristoff's influence as well? How much had inhabiting a departed mortal's body changed him? Was he more . . . human now than he was in the Fade? Would that be a good thing, or a bad thing? Would the spirit even know if asked?
"I would assume you speak of the dreamers who are aware of their state. I have come across a few on occasion, but aside from their small manipulations of the Fade, they appear the same to me as any other mortal."
The mage was slightly disappointed for a reason he could not fathom, so he decided to ignore it for more lighthearted pursuits. "Well, what about the dreams themselves? Can you tell differences in those? Any . . . juicy stories you care to share?" Anders' lips quirked upwards in a mischievous smirk.
The spirit shook his head. "Even if such stories could be relevant, they would not be mine to divulge."
"Oh, you're no fun."
"I do not see why that should be something to aspire to," Justice confirmed, "To do so would seem a foolish desire."
Mildly frustrated, Anders crossed his arms and huffed in annoyance, but the comment reminded him of something Justice had mentioned earlier about spirits, demons, and the perversion of desires. What if Justice had some desires that could pervert him eventually? His awareness of spirits' desires implied that he did know something about them and probably even had a few of his own. Thoughts whirled in his head as gears in clockwork, and by the time their Commander exited the shop and rejoined them, Anders had his next question for the spirit ready.
"Are you saying that you could become a demon, Justice?"