A/N:I can't believe how long it's taken me to get my arse around to finishing it, but here it is! Enjoy!
Chapter Five: Closing the book
Maker and Kakyuu could feel it, their leader was returning. They nodded to one another, already knowing, and made their way to the palace courtyard. Straining their eyes towards the brightly illuminated sky, they immediately spotted it, a single shooting star.
Maker walked to her princess's side, grasping her hand tightly.
"I'm sure..it's alright." She said reassuringly, though she wasn't very certain herself. Had Fighter been unable to find Healer?
A few short moments later and Fighter materialized in front of them in a spray of blue stars. In her arms lay a completely limp Healer. Kakyuu covered her mouth, sinking to her knees, not caring that her brand new pure white dress was getting dirtied. She'd worn it for Healer's return, in celebration. Maker stared in silence, fighting back her concern. Fighter's eyes slowly raised from Healer's body in her arms to Maker.
It was like a stab to Maker's heart, how blank Fighter's face was. Fighter made her way into the castle, silently, numbly. Maker helped Kakyuu up, and the two followed behind. Fighter went straight to Healer's room, gently placing her on the bed, tucking her in with care. Her gloved hand grazed across her pale face, brushing the hair from it. Maker watched this action intently, such care and love into every movement of Fighter. She wondered, if she herself would ever be capable of such gentleness. Fighter turned then, and questioned Fighter with her eyes.
"She got hit pretty hard. Go ahead and call the other healers. I can't help her." Fighter said evenly, walking out of the room. Maker was torn between comforting her leader, and getting help for her friend. In the end, she decided that Healer needed medical attention, and fast. Willing her long legs to carry her as fast as they would, she raced down the halls, the only sounds being the clicking of her boots and her breathing.
Kakyuu, who'd been standing in the hallway the entire time, followed Fighter out. She walked silently, her dress lightly swishing against the marbled floors. Fighter glanced over her shoulder, but Kakyuu said nothing, merely following her. Turning down the old and forgotten passageways, Fighter managed to lose Kakyuu.
The minute she was alone she dropped to her knees sobbing. She just hadn't been fast enough to save Healer. She clutched angrily at her shorts, secretly wishing she could tear herself to pieces. True, there was a chance Healer would wake up. But if she didn't...
No, Fighter wouldn't think about that, she just couldn't. Taking your own life was such a crime of a senshi...doing so would mean giving up her chance at rebirth. Hugging herself, she cried in the darkness of the castle, her only feeling being the sharp pain in her hot and hot tears down her cheek. She gave start when a hand brushed her tears aside.
"My dearest Fighter, you don't have to bear this alone."
Fighter's eyes flicked up, sure enough her princess had managed to sniff her out.
"Please, princess...leave me be.."
Kakyuu frowned a bit, "No can do."
Fighter jerked her head away from Kakyuu angrily. Stubborn as always, that was her princess!
Kakyuu said neatly on the ground next to Fighter. "We're all hurting, Fighter. Don't be so selfish as to think Healer only matters to you."
"It's my fault.."
Kakyuu turned confused eyes towards her starlight. "What do you mean?"
"Healer, she jumped in the way of an attack directed for me. That's why she's hurt. If I'd been smarter, I wouldn't have tried to fight. I would've taken her and ran. But no, I wanted to punish them for taking her from me." Fighter slammed her fist against the wall in frustration, ignoring the shooting pain that traveled up her arm.
Kakyuu internally shuddered as she felt the wall shake from the force of Fighter's fist. Delicately, she placed a soothing hand on Fighter's shoulder. "I'm sure Healer will pull through. She's a sailor senshi, remember? Come now, let's go see if she's awake yet." Kakyuu then stood, tugging on Fighter's arm.
Fighter allowed herself to be pulled up, following behind Kakyuu in a zombie like state. Her mind flashed back to Healer, of finding her and holding in her arms. Absently, she touched her fingers to her lips, fresh tears spilling down her face as she remembered that last kiss. As she approached Healer's room she forced herself to pull it together, brushing her face clean, managing to force a neutral, if strained, expression. Kakyuu entered first, seating herself on a cozy looking chair. Fighter nodded to her, before making her way to Healer's bed. Healer was hooked up to multiple machines, and Fighter grinned.
"Ah, poor thing, you don't like this one bit, do you?" she teased with a gentle whisper, grasping Healer's hand within her own.
She stayed that for a long while, before finally thinking of something to say.
"Hey. Wake up. Wake up for me, won't you Healer? You're home now. You're safe." Her voice shook a bit, so she stopped talking. She knew Maker had entered the room since. She had to stay strong. How else would her comrade and princess keep it together, if she couldn't? She was always the supporting beam, she wasn't allowed to crack.
"What's her condition, Maker?" Fighter demanded suddenly, turning. Her expression was almost scary, but Maker knew she was struggling beneath it.
"Minor injuries, severely malnourished...she should recover."
Fighter nodded, sighing with relief on the inside.
"However..." Maker said slowly, going over the charts. Fighter whipped her head back around to Maker.
"What?" She demanded icily.
"Severe head trauma. We don't know the extent. She may not...function normally when she wakes up."
Fighter found an interesting spot on the ground and stared at it. "I see.." she said, her breathing shaky.
Maker nodded, "Right now, she's in a coma. But it's good, it'll give her brain plenty of time to repair itself before she's functional again. There's nothing more any of us can do, it's all up to her now. You should get rest, Fighter. You need it, I can tell."
Fighter shook her head, denying the accusation. "I'm fine."
"Fighter..." Maker said gently, walking up to her leader. "Torturing yourself just to stay by her side is admirable, but it's not helping anyone. We need you strong, in case something happens here." Fighter made a tight fist, greatly desiring to sock Maker in the stomach. Thinking better of it, she turned and left the room.
It was funny, now that the rush of everything happening was dying down, every step Fighter took seemed more and more difficult. As she stumbled to her room, her henshin wore off, her body too weak to support the power of Sailor Star Fighter. From the shadows of the hallway, Maker shook her head in amusement, turning to head to the library. "That fool" she muttered to herself.
Seiya stared at her ceiling, her heart aching for Healer, going over all their precious memories as she drifted off to sleep.
It was three whole days before Seiya woke up, stumbling sleepily into the castle kitchens early in the morning, when the cooks were just starting to prepare breakfast. Hurriedly they prepared food for her, which she sleepily ate, having been woken up from hunger.
A soft chuckle sounded behind her and she grumbled in irritation, turning around. Sure enough, Kakyuu stood before her.
"Ah, so the sleeping beauty finally woke up. And hungry to boot!"
Seiya glared at Kakyuu, her sailor senshi uniform appearing on her body in a flash of stars. She was embarrassed her princess saw her in her nightwear. Kakyuu waved her off, "You looked cute in your sleepwear, Seiya-chan!"
Fighter groaned, before drinking the glass of juice a cook had poured for her. "So why are you up this early? Usually you just wait in the dining hall."
"Couldn't sleep."
Fighter nodded knowingly.
"Fighter, you were screaming out for Healer in your sleep..off and on, the last three days."
Fighter winced. "That bad?"
Kakyuu nodded solemnly, "You have to stop torturing yourself. She's doing better now."
"Did she wake up yet?" Fighter asked, halfway to the door already, about to dash off and see her.
"Not yet. It could be a while, Fighter."
Fighter's gaze drifted to the door. "I see...how's Maker handling things?"
"No doubt burying her nose in a book, of course." Kakyuu replied. Fighter strode out the door intent on seeking out her book loving friend. Sure enough, she could be found in the library.
"Fighter, I see that you're awake and lively." Maker commented as Fighter approached.
"How are...you handling things?" Fighter asked. Maker was a bit surprised by Fighter's concern.
"Don't worry about me. You should go check on Healer." Maker said absently, not even looking up from her book.
Fighter kicked Maker's shin from under the table, but got up and let her be. Maker was a terrible liar. After Fighter had left, Maker winced and rubbed her shin, but that was the least of her concerns.
Fighter made her way to Healer's room, reluctantly. It was so hard to see her in this kind of state. Yet, she wanted to make sure she was all right. She knocked on the door at first, before realizing that she wouldn't get an answer.
As expected, Healer was unconscious still, but seemed pretty stable. Fighter idly fixed Healer's hair, not really knowing what else to do with herself.
"Gomen ne." She whispered softly, kneeling at the edge of the bed. She held Healer's hand within her own, stroking it gently. There was so much that needed to be said between the two...Fighter cursed herself for not saying those things sooner. She'd always thought she'd have all the time in the world to express just how much she loved Healer.
"Healer, wake up, please..." Fighter pleaded, gripping Healer's hand tightly. She couldn't take this anymore! She stood up to leave, but something stopped her. Looking towards her hand, she saw that Healer was holding onto her. A few moments later, Healer's eyes flicked open.
"H-Healer!"
"W-what happened?" Healer asked in confusion, staring blankly at Fighter. Just then, a nurse walked in.
"Tell our princess...that Healer's awake." Fighter ordered, turning her attention back to her teammate.
Healer wracked her brain, how did she end up here? She couldn't remember anything...
"We were attacked by aliens from another system..in the fight you were injured. You really can't remember anything?" Fighter asked softly, sitting on the side of the bed, taking Healer's hand in hers once again. Healer quickly pulled her hand away.
"What are you doing?" She snapped.
Fighter stared at her in surprise. "What do you mean?"
"Just because I got hurt doesn't mean you can be all touchy feely." Healer scoffed. Fighter regarded her comrade for several long moments before standing up.
"I see...you really don't remember anything, do you."
"I told you I didn't!"
Fighter took a deep breath in before speaking. "Well, I'm sure Kakyuu will be down to speak with you shortly." and left the room.
Healer watched Fighter leave, before staring at her ceiling. 'What was that just now? Why...why did I feel so strange near Fighter? Like...like something just wasn't right?'
"Ah, you're awake!" Kakyuu said cheerily from the doorway. Healer turned her head, offering her princess a rare smile.
"Fighter's...acting weird." Healer said.
"Oh?" Kakyuu said in confusion, standing next to Healer's bedside.
"She seemed so sad, I could feel it...why? Why is Fighter sad?"
Kakyuu grinned at her starlight, "Because she was worried sick about you! I'm sure she'll come around."
"I...I guess...Kakyuu, how long have I been unconscious for?"
Kakyuu looked thoughtful, before counting on her fingers. "Three days, I think."
Healer sighed deeply, "I knew it.."
"Knew what?" Kakyuu asked.
"I...I can't remember...anything.."
"Maybe it's just too soon. I'm sure you'll recover it someday."
Healer nodded. "I just feel like I'm forgetting something really important, it's driving me crazy."
Kakyuu smiled, "Knowing that there's something forgotten is the first step to remembering it!"
Healer managed a laugh, "You get an A+ in the cheering up department."
Kakyuu shrugged, "Shall I get you some food?"
"Yes, please."
Fighter leaned against the balcony, looking up to the stars. She laughed, in a forced, painful way. "Figures, huh?"
"Fighter." Maker's calm voice echoed from the doorway. Fighter turned slightly, facing her.
"Why don't you just tell her? Sit down and explain, every little thing that happened between the two of you in the last year. I'm sure her feelings will return if you tell her your history together."
Fighter sighed slightly, "Even if I tried, she wouldn't want to listen. She hated me before, you know that."
"She never hated you! She looked up to you! Just as I do! You're our leader!"
"It'd never be the same. She'd just end up feeling frustrated, upset and guilty that she couldn't remember and return these feelings. I won't put that kind of pressure on her."
"Seiya.."
"It hurts, but I've accepted it. Please, don't tell Healer. I've already made Kakyuu promise not to."
"But-"
"It's alright... just knowing that she is safe...and that once, she loved me back is enough. She is not the same anymore, without those memories..she doesn't love me. And you know what? That's alright. I just wish I had more time with her."
For the oddest reason, Star Maker, who'd never shown emotion before, found herself crying. For her leader wouldn't cry for herself. Maker closed the distance between them, embracing her leader.
"Kakyuu and I are here for you."
Fighter smiled bitterly, "I know."
As usual, Fighter entered in her journal that night.
"I've realized...that what makes us who we are is not just our personalities, but the things that happen to us. To her, the last year never happened. She doesn't remember falling in love with me. This is my own punishment..I should have been able to save her. I should have just left, should have said "Screw the council!" but I did not. This is where I have failed her, where I have failed myself. And so I'll accept my solitude as my sentence. Watching her from afar, remembering what was...and what could have been."
Healer could feel it, every day. That painful loneliness of Fighter. It bothered her, but she dare not ask. It drove her insane, and so every day, more and more, she avoided her. 'It's not my problem..it's not my problem...' she told herself. Over and over. Until she began to actually believe it.