The Measure of a Man

STORY STATUS: Completed 4/13/2008

WORD COUNT: 1,389

Author's Note: They don't mention much about the President (the guy who was President for the first six seasons, not Hayes), so I figured this would be a good time to explain it a little and establish the connection between him and Jack. Thanks, as always, to my beta reader, Cyn.

As I finish reading the update report on Colonel Jack O'Neill, who was finally able to go home today, I can not believe this man is still alive . . . and sane. Although, some might say the 'sane' part is yet to be determined. I can count on one hand the number of men I know who might have been able to endure that kind of torture then re and not only escape, but also rescue a slave while doing it. He still has to go through several psychiatric sessions with McKenzie, but I have no doubt that he'll pass them and be back on active duty in no time. I don't believe I've ever met anyone as remarkable, and resilient as Jack.

I was shocked when I learned Jack had disappeared from the Tok'ra base, and was relieved when he'd come back. When I heard what he'd been put through, I was angry. Actually, that's an understatement. What that bastard did to him. . . . I was worried as he went through withdrawal. I'm thrilled that he seems to have come through it no more the worse for wear than he was before the withdrawal started. His recovery isn't over yet, not by a long shot, but from what I know about his team, they won't let him get through this alone.

I didn't know much about him before our first meeting. I knew he'd joined the Air Force Academy at the age of seventeen and had graduated at the top of his class. He's been involved, in someway or another, in every US involved war from Vietnam to Operation Desert Storm. He's got a chest full of medals that would make most generals jealous. Even more so if they knew about all the ones he's been awarded but doesn't wear, to prove it. I knew he'd been married at one time, but had divorced not long after the tragic death of his only child.

The first time I met him in person, after the first time his team saved the planet, I wasn't sure what to expect. I'd heard rumors, and read reports, that ranged from him being a hard-assed, no nonsense military officer, to him being a practical joker extraordinaire, and just about everything in between. Some had even reported him as being irreverent and insubordinate. If not for the reprimands, it's entirely possible he could have become one of the youngest generals in the history of the United States Air Force. I had decided to reserve judgment until I had met the man myself.

I was a little surprised. He was somewhat nervous at first (I think he was afraid of saying something that would get him court-marshalled), but warmed up quickly. He was a little sarcastic, quick to smile, quicker to crack a joke, and not afraid to speak his mind. I liked him right from the beginning. The more I got to know him over the past few years, the more I saw of his sarcastic side. That man has a sharp tongue that's for sure.

After our first meeting at the White House, I started reading a good many of his mission reports. He is the kind of officer that I, during my time in the service, would have been honored to serve under, privileged to command, and damn proud to have fought beside.

I served in the Army for twenty-one years, and met a lot of fine officers and enlisted men (and women), but I can honestly say I have never met anyone quite like him. Never have I met anyone who has gained the admiration and respect of so many people from every branch of the military, even those who don't particularly like him very much. No one can deny his devotion to his team, the Air Force, and his country.

It was also after the first meeting, I realized that I knew him. Or at least, he looked really familiar. I started looking further into his record. Which is another reason I'm amazed that he's still alive and able to serve. He's been captured by the enemy and tortured three times (and that was before he joined the Stargate program). He's been shot five times, and stabbed three times. He broke nine bones and had to drag himself out of a blazing hot desert, in hostile territory, after a mishap with his parachute. I lost count of the number of times he's been zatted. He's had surgery on his knee three times. And that's not even the half of it. I'd hate to see how thick his medical file is. "Files" is probably more appropriate. I seriously doubt it all fits in one file.

Anyway, after looking into his service record, I realized that that meeting hadn't been our first. I did know him. I had met him almost twelve years ago. I was a Colonel then, and he was a Captain. He was beginning training for the Special Forces, and I was on my way out. I'd agreed to train one last unit, which happened to be the one Jack was in. He was just as much of a sarcastic wise ass then as he is now. We became friends during training and kept in touch for a while, but after about two years, we started to drift apart. His team went on more missions than any other team I'd heard of before. He was home so rarely, I didn't want to intrude on his family time when he was home. Eventually, I just lost track of him all together.

Back then he smiled more, but that was before he'd done ten years of Special Ops missions and had lost his beloved child.

Upon our second meeting at the White House, I called him on it. Turns out he did remember me; he just didn't say anything because he didn't want to embarrass me if I didn't remember him.

I've gotten to know him, again, pretty well over the last few years. It never ceases to amaze me how someone with such a low sense of self worth can inspire such loyalty and respect from so many people. How can someone who places almost no value on his own life inspire others to do so much more than they ever thought themselves capable of?

How can someone who has accomplished so much, has won so many battles and saved so many lives using his intelligence (I don't buy his dummy act, not since the moment I first met him), and street smarts, think that his own life has so much less value than the people he works with?

I know how. Because it's been drilled into him by men like General West since he was barely old enough to shave. And, I'm ashamed to admit, that will probably never change. We need him too much. And he will continue to do it gladly until, a) he dies in battle, b) he's injured so badly that he can't fight anymore and is given a medical discharge, or c) he finally says the hell with it all and retires for good. The sad truth is, with his personality and moral code, I seriously doubt he will ever retire. If he continues to fight, he won't live long enough to die of old age.

A part of me wants to urge him to retire. To tell him he's done enough and to take his well earned rest. Realistically, I know that will never happen either. He wouldn't do it anyway, and I won't ask. The program needs him too much. Even if he lives long enough to one day realize he's to old for field work, I have no doubt he'll take over as commander of the SGC someday.

To Jack O'Neill words like honor, duty, and loyalty are much more than just words, guidelines, or notions. They are how he leads his people, and how he lives his life. He can be harsh and, at times cruel, when the situation demands it. On the other hand, despite the tragedies he has suffered and the terrible things that have been done to him (and that he has had to do) he has an enormous heart with an amazing capacity for love and compassion.

And that, I suppose, is the true measure of a man.

TBC