Title: Catching the Stars

Pairing: Pike and Henry (from the movie Big Eden)

Rating: NC-17

Word Count: ~ 3500

Summary: The courtship and evolving relationship between Pike and Henry is told in flashbacks after a horrible incident rocks shakes the foundation of everyone who loves them both. (i.e.: The entire town of Big Eden!) (In my universe the last scene of the movie - the dance and kiss - happened a year later at the annual summer picnic.)

Genre: Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Romance, Friendship

Disclaimer: They don't belong to me - I just play with them a little.

Warnings: Injection of harsh reality into the idyllic world of Big Eden.

Present

"Let me give you a hand with that." Henry reached for the heavy crate containing Pike's milk delivery.

Pike yanked it out of reach. "I got it."

"I'm right here - no biggie - just let me help..."

"I said I got it, Henry." Pike snapped. "Please go somewhere else - anywhere else - just not here."

Henry looked stung.

Pike immediately felt guilty. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Henry said it without thinking. It was obvious that it was far from okay.

"No. It's not okay. I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. It's just..." Pike sighed and put the crate on the ground in front of him. "...I know you mean well. And I know you're trying to help. But you've been hovering around me for two weeks. Every time I go to do something you're there to...smother." Pike was shocked by his own words, but then realized it needed to be said - no matter how much it killed him to see that look on Henry's face. "You're...smothering."

Dexter's General Store had been reopened for two weeks. Pike jumped right back into his routine. He was up before dawn and he didn't get home until later in the evening. Henry tried to convince Pike to ease his way back, but Pike insisted he needed to just get on with it. He was done being weak and wounded.

And It felt good. Pike liked working hard and he loved his store.

For Henry it was terrifying. He didn't want to let Pike out of sight. What he said was that he just wanted to make sure Pike didn't over-do it. But in the deepest part of his heart, buried beneath so many layers of denial and fear, was the truth - keeping an eye on Pike reassured him that the man was safe and sound and free from danger.

It was all so irrational, which Henry would willingly admit if he actually understood it himself.

Instead, "Maybe if you would have listened to me in the first place I wouldn't have to hover. You come home every night and fall into bed exhausted. You're stiff and sore when you wake up in the morning. You're going to hurt yourself if you don't..."

"Henry." Pike's tone was measured and close to a warning. "We aren't talking about this again. I'm fine."

"No, you're not..."

"Stop it, Henry." Pike was not having the same conversation with his lover for the millionth time. "Please."

"You're working yourself into the ground and I never see you..."

Pike interrupted before Henry could take it into another direction. "I thought we worked that all out a long time ago."

"We did." Henry knew he was being crazy about it. He just couldn't seem to stop himself. "But it's different now."

"No, Henry. I love you so much for caring about me the way that you do...but we can't keep doing this. I can't keep doing this. Please understand."

"I know." Henry tried to calm down. "I do...understand."

"It's time to get back to our normal routine." Pike reasoned.

Henry reached for Pike. He just needed to touch. "But you're always tired and when you wake up..." He hated sounding so whiney.

"It's been two weeks, Henry. It'll get better - it already has. Please be patient and let me do it my way." Pike pulled him closer and felt like they had gotten over the worst of it. Henry looked less anxious.

"I'm patient." Henry pouted.

Pike smiled. "Of course you are."

FLASH BACK

Pike walked into the bathroom he shared with his lover and found himself trying to stifle a laugh. Henry was standing in front of the sink, leaning himself as close to the mirror as possible to inspect his face. After a few minutes Henry noticed that he had an audience and he spoke to Pike while looking at him without turning around through the reflection in the mirror. "I look old."

"Old?" Pike asked after scrunching up his forehead.

"Yeah. Old." Henry reiterated. "Look at me. I have hair growing everywhere except my head, I have bags the size of grapefruits under my eyes, I'm pretty sure I have three chins and my neck looks...weird."

"You're not old, Henry." Pike assured him.

"How do you look like that and I look like this, when we're the same age?" Henry continued as if Pike hadn't said anything.

"How do I look?" Pike tried not to grin.

Henry waived his hands in front of Pike's reflection in the mirror. "Like that. Great hair, great complexion, great body...you smell good, too."

"Smell?"

"Yeah. Smell. You smell good. I think I'm starting to get that old-man-smell." Henry sighed while he sniffed his arm. "I'm old."

"How many times do I have to tell you that you're gorgeous before you believe me?" Pike finally succumb to his boyfriend's adorableness and scooted up behind him to wrap his arms around Henry's shoulders. "You're the brightest star in my sky." He kissed the side of Henry's head before burying his face into his neck and taking a deep, exaggerated breath. "Mmmmmmmmmm."

"I thought you left already." Henry stubbornly stuck to his foul mood.

"Jim opened up this morning so I could get a few invoices paid. Our computer is faster than the one at the store." Pike explained. " And you smell good."

"You could do better." Henry was almost pouting.

Pike turned Henry around so they were face-to-face. He brushed his fingers through Henry's messy bed-head-hair, being careful not to pull and upset his suddenly sensitive lover. "Where is this coming from?"

"I love you," was Henry's answer.

It was a bit confusing. "I love you too."

"Do you?"

"Henry..."

"I never see you. I mean I see you all the time, but I never see you. You're always working and the time we do get to be alone...you would rather have me time." Henry said the last two words with bitter sarcasm while using his fingers to make air-quotes.

Pike backed up enough to look Henry in the eyes. "Wait. We agreed to me time. You said you needed it too. It's one night a week."

"You would rather hang around the back of your star gazing than come home to me. We have stars here too, you know." Henry continued with his convoluted explanation.

"I know. It's not about the stars, Henry. It's about me needing time for myself. I've been alone my whole life - I need time to just be with myself...to...think. It's not about you. I love you. I love spending time with you." Pike explained what he thought they had worked out weeks ago.

It snuck up on them. Between Pike's long days and Henry's new studio, they spent a lot of time together. Almost all their time was spent together. Henry had a couple of hours each morning to himself, and he always got home before Pike in the evenings, so he didn't feel the need for alone time - he just felt the need for alone time with Pike. They didn't really get much of that.

Pike on the other hand never had a moment to himself. The guys were in from the moment he opened the store in the morning. Henry was there by mid-morning and in the rare moments Pike had the store to himself, he had to be on alert in case a customer showed up. Pike felt anxious and grumpy and couldn't really figure out why.

Until it all came to a head one morning when Henry decided to get up early to talk. Henry was not a morning person and Pike was teetering on the edge from feeling crowded in. The combination led to the biggest argument they had had up to that point. One minute Henry was making the coffee - all wrong according to Pike - and the next minute the door was slamming as Pike stormed out of the house.

There was some yelling in between but neither of them actually heard each other.

By the time Henry slunk into the store later, they both felt remorseful and they both had managed to figure out what was going on underneath the surface. They made a deal right then and there. Pike had a night alone once a week and Jim watched the store for half a day on Sunday so they could have some quality time alone together.

It was a great plan until Sunday afternoons shrunk into a couple of hours here and there because there was always something that came up. Apparently neither of them were very good at saying no to invitations and requests for help with various projects.

Which led them to the current situation with an insecure Henry and a baffled Pike standing in a small bathroom while their second biggest argument brewed close to the surface.

"I'm going. We can talk about this later after you calm down." Pike pushed away and left the bathroom.

Henry chased after him. "Calm down? I am calm. You see what I mean, Pike? You don't even care that we never have a moment to ourselves. It's just a matter of time and you'll figure it out."

Pike couldn't leave that one hanging out there. He turned and placed his hands on his hips. "Figure what out, Henry? You're not making sense."

"You're impossible." Henry barked after spending a minute trying to sift through his emotions to figure our what exactly the what was.

"Bye Henry." Pike threw his hands in the air before turning around again and pushing the screen door hard enough to make it bounce back on its spring to smack him in the shoulder before he cleared the doorway.

Every time he heard the bell ring from the front door of the store that day, Pike would hope for Henry to walk through it. But it was never Henry.

Henry hadn't shown up all day.

Pike could feel an ache in his chest that got worse as each minute passed without seeing his other-half. And that's exactly what Henry had become. He completed Pike in a way that he never expected and not seeing him all day after such a bizarre and ugly fight had Pike's anxiety shooting through the roof.

He hated that he had made Henry feel...whatever it was the Henry was feeling. He was still trying to figure that out. But for Pike it didn't really matter because he never wanted to be the reason for Henry to have that look on his face. He looked so...what? What was it that he saw in Henry's eyes? The closest he could come to describing it was that Henry looked hurt and afraid.

By the end of the day Pike was literally crawling out of his skin from the anxiety. He just wanted to lock the doors and get home so he could work it out with Henry and put his two halves back together again. Just as he was turning the sign on the front window to indicate the store was closed, Henry's face appeared on the other side.

To say relief swept through Pike like a Tsunami would be a metaphorical understatement. Pike was beyond relieved. He almost cried.

He quickly unlocked the door so he could grab onto his man and pull him inside. Pike pulled Henry into his arms and held on as if his life depended on it. "I'm sorry."

"No." Henry's arms were tight around Pike's waist. His face was buried into Pike's neck and he was trying hard not to cry. "You didn't do anything to be sorry about."

"Henry..."

"I'm sorry." Henry interrupted before pulling away for only long enough to lean up for a kiss. It was the sweetest kiss they had ever shared. "Can we sit for a minute?"

Pike nodded toward the odd array of chairs and sofas in the middle of the store. Once he locked the door, he followed Henry and sat next to him on the same couch where a year earlier, Henry had settled into one place to let Pike find him. Pike turned enough to reach across the small space between them and wrap his long fingers around Henry's neck. He squeezed reassuringly before brushing Henry's stubbled jaw with his thumb. "Henry?"

"When I was nine my parents were coming home from a housewarming party and they were hit head on my some guy who had just left a bar a mile up the road." Henry started explaining. "They died instantly, but the ambulance still took them to the hospital. I knew what being dead meant. I just never really considered that my parents would ever be dead. I never really considered what dead really meant until I started to miss them. I never saw them again and I missed them and..." Henry took a deep, shaky breath.

Pike scooted closer and continued with his gentle soothing touch of thumb to face. "Sounds scary."

"There was some of that, but mostly there was this...emptiness. It hurt so much. I loved my grandparents and they were so good to me, but I missed the way my mom smelled. I missed the way my dad carried me on his back and threw me into bed so hard I bounced. We would laugh the whole way and I never wanted him to leave and turn off my light because it felt so good to laugh with him." A single tear rolled down Henry's cheek. "I missed them so much."

Pike shifted enough to place his other hand on Henry's thigh. Henry responded by grabbing his hand and pulling it to his chest. He held Pike's hand with both of his own. "I never let myself get that close to anyone again. I loved my grandparents, but I never let myself feel like I needed them. I moved as soon as I could - as far away as I could - just to prove to myself that I didn't need anyone. I saved myself for Dean even though I knew I could never have him. So I never got close to anyone - romantically speaking - because I was in love with Dean. But I wasn't - not really - I just didn't want to need anyone and Dean was a good excuse not to get close enough to anyone to let that happen."

"You didn't want to lose anyone." Pike filled in what was left unspoken.

Henry nodded sadly before speaking again. "And then there's you."

"You're not losing me." Pike scooted even closer and pulled Henry close with the hand that still rested on his neck. Once he had Henry leaning against his shoulder he reiterated. "You're not losing me."

Henry still clung to Pike's hand. "You've been so distracted and busy. I guess I just started to panic. Then today after you left I just wandered around the house thinking about it. I realized that the way it feels to think about losing you is a lot like the way it felt when I missed them. This morning was more about that than about you." Henry still looked like he was trying to work it all out himself. "Do you understand what I'm trying to say?"

Pike nodded. "For me it was trust."

"What was?" Henry wasn't expecting any revelations from Pike.

"The thing that kept me from connecting with anyone. Jim always says I'm shy - and I am - but more than that I just don't believe in love." Pike chuckled softly. "Well...I didn't until you showed up again."

"Your parents. I can understand how hard it would be to trust anyone after that" Henry understood perfectly.

"When you walked in the store that morning with Grace, I felt it. Just like high school all over again. I could barely speak, I was so nervous around you." Pike admitted. He flattened his palm against Henry's chest and brushed his fingers down one side of Henry's face. "I wanted to love you. I wanted you take care of you. I wanted you to be happy."

"So you cooked for me."

"And kept my distance. I didn't trust love. I didn't believe in it. To me, love was just an excuse to get hurt." Pike couldn't believe he was confessing so much. "Then you did something I never expected and you loved me back. I hid from you that night, you know - the night you left Sam's carving on my deck - I was standing behind the door hiding. I never expected you to feel anything for me and suddenly I didn't want it."

"You never told me that."

"Jim had it all figured out before I did. He's always been the one to get me to head toward the right path." Pike could feel warmth radiating from his chest. "And you're definitely the right path for me, Henry Hart."

He finally saw a smile break through the pained expression on Henry's face. "Aren't we a pair?"

"We are."

"You know I'm okay with your me time, right? This morning wasn't really about that." Henry asked a little insecurely. "And I love you, Pike. I never want to hurt you. You can believe in that."

Pike answered with a slow, sensual kiss before whispering into Henry's lips. "Let's go home for some of that quality time together."

PRESENT

For the first time since the store re-opened, Pike had the morning to himself. After the alarm clocked buzzed beside their bed, Pike watched his lover roll over and mumble something before he settled back into sleep. Pike placed a soft kiss to Henry's forehead before he got out of bed, grabbed his robe off the hook on the back of the bedroom door, and sleepily stumbled his way into the kitchen to get coffee started.

Having his morning to himself felt good. It was finally back to the way it used to be before a bunch of scared kids changed his life. He took a little extra time in the shower - just because he could - and got dressed quietly while Henry pretended to sleep. Pike could see his boyfriend watching him between barely opened eyes. Pike couldn't stop the giant grin from forming on his face and kept his back turned to the bed until he could get it under control.

Pike finished his breakfast, put Henry's in the oven to stay warm, and prepared a new batch of coffee so Henry would only need to plug in the percolator when he woke up later. Everything about his morning felt perfect. He looked around the kitchen and smiled to himself. This was exactly the way he loved to start the day. He missed taking care of his drowsy lover each day and loved knowing that Henry would start his day with a lovingly prepared meal.

Pike snuck into the bedroom and sat on the side of the bed he shared with his dreamboat. He thought Henry looked amazing in the dim light filtering through the door from the hallway. His hair was sticking up in all directions, showing way more scalp than Henry was comfortable with. His face was relaxed and shadowed with dark stubble. Every feature on Henry's face - from the lines around his eyes, to his prominent ears, to his regal nose - was perfect and beautiful and Pike had never found the right words to express that. He brushed Henry's mussed hair with his fingers before leaning down to give him a kiss on his forehead. "Thank you for pretending to sleep. I know this is hard for you, but I promise I'll be fine."

"Not pretending." Henry grinned with his eyes closed.

"Of course not." Pike smirked before he placed one more kiss on Henry's lips. "Your new canvases will be in this afternoon."

TBC