Chapter 16: But You Can Always Find Me Here (It's really been a treat) -
Thursday September 17, 1998; Sunnydale High School Biology Classroom 132, 4:10 P.M.
Rupert Giles finished disentangling himself from Jonathan, rising carefully to his feet and putting down a hand to help lift the small teen to his own. Both of them looked around at the carnage, blinking.
Xander knelt down next to the unconscious Faith, reaching out to brush the hair back from her face. His finger tips gently tracked the swelling purple mark along her jaw. Absently, he noticed his hand was shaking. It hadn't stopped, really - not since the feral rush from Hideyoshi's mystical pulse had left him spent in its wake.
Nearby, Heidi sunk down onto her heels, shaking her head as she glanced from Xander, to Faith, to the groaning Tor, and back again. Still cradling her hand against her chest, she raised an eyebrow to Xander.
"You know, I really, really hate you, Boss," she remarked.
A sour breath of laughter escaped Xander's lips as he looked back at her. "It's mutual," he said, his mouth curling up at the corners.
"Was lots of fun though," Heidi laughed. "Have to do it again - some time around half past never."
"Promise I won't throw an end of the world party without forgetting your invitations," Xander stated. Tor barked out a laugh that was half gasp, half groan, rolling over onto an elbow facing them.
"Gonna hold you to that," Tor remarked.
Nodding, Xander looked around, wondering where Cordelia had gotten off to. He started to rise up from his kneeling position, and gave that idea up with a groan as his hip protested vigorously.
Near the front, Harmony stood stock still for several long moments as the others gathered themselves back together, a myriad of expressions chasing themselves across her face. Finally, she swept a molten looking glare over everyone, stuck her nose in the air, and exclaimed "You... FREAKS!" before bursting into tears and rushing out. A dazed looking Aura shook herself all over, blinked several times, and then carefully walked from the back of the room to the front, following Harmony out more slowly. Rubbing gingerly at the back of her head, she exited, waving off a concerned question from Giles.
A muffled "Euuughh!' came from under the table where Cordelia had disappeared, followed shortly after by a wild eyed, wild haired, and infuriated looking Cordelia scrambling out from under and up to her feet. "That... " she trailed off spluttering, apparently failing to find an expletive or expression foul enough. She settled for an icy glare around the room before grimacing and heading for the downed Xander and unconscious Faith.
Kneeling down by Xander, Cordelia looked down at Faith, briskly checking the shorter girl's pulse and peeling back an eyelid before letting out a pent up breath. She looked up at Xander, blinking, and blew a wild strand of hair out of her eyes. "Hey, doofus," she remarked.
"Hey yourself," Xander reached out to brush more hair away from her face, cupping her cheek as Cordelia turned her face into his palm.
A brilliant, radiant, full blown version of the thousand watt grin broke across her lips and she locked eyes with him. "You came in after me."
"Did you ever doubt it?" Xander asked, frowning.
"Six months ago I wouldn't have been sure," she admitted.
"It's not six months ago anymore," Xander said.
"No. It's not, is it?" Breaking the too intense eye contact, Cordelia looked down at Faith. "She going to be all right?"
"Tranked," Xander said. "Tamara nailed her. Then Heidi cold-cocked her." Cordelia nodded, her eyes flickering to the black Cordette and back to him.. "She should come out of it in a bit," he added. "'All right' may take awhile."
Cordelia nodded again. "Yeah. Know the feeling." Biting at her lower lip, she reached down and unbuckled Hideyoshi's collar from around Faith's throat, pulling it away and flinging it across the room with a convulsive gesture.
Straightening up on top of one of the lab tables, Willow looked around in bewilderment, turned bright red, and then burst into tears. A no longer hirsute Oz caught her as she jumped down, sweeping her into his arms to bury her face in his shoulder. He held her quietly as her shoulders heaved.
Catching herself on a table as her knees buckled, then levering herself up a bit unsteadily to her feet, Tamara went over to the small cluster around Faith. Offering a hand to the bruised looking and disheveled Heidi she pulled as the blonde girl worked herself up to to her feet. Tor managed to work himself to his feet on his own, rubbing his jaw and shaking his head.
"Ok, so is it always like this?" Tamara asked, the empty tranq gun dangling from her right hand.
"No idea," Heidi said, leaning against her shoulder and blinking lazily.
"We're first timers too," Tor admitted. "Mostly."
Tamara nodded with a serious expression. "'k. Just asking."
Reaching down and pulling a dart out of his upper thigh, Tor gave her an amused look. "They're breeding cheerleaders tough these days. Something in the water?"
"It's the acrobatic routines and the short skirts," Cordelia remarked. "They build character."
All three of them stared at her, and then Tamara spluttered laughter. Tor and Heidi shook their heads, then howled in response, reaction fueling the near hysterical laughs. "That they do," Tamara nodded, wiping at her eyes. "That they do."
She glanced over as Jonathan and Giles wandered over to join them, Giles stooping to retrieve the other tranquilizer rifle from the floor. She gave a nod to the dazed looking Jonathan, sending a smile his direction. Hesitantly, he smiled back, flushing slightly under her scrutiny.
"They're making tougher geeks these days, too," Tamara remarked, causing Jonathan's flush to deepen until the tips of his ears reddened and he looked away.
"I've noticed that," Cordelia said in a serious voice. She punched Xander in the biceps, smirking at him. They watched as a quiet and very grim looking Oz led Willow toward the room exit with an arm around her shoulders. Meeting the groups eyes in passing, he gave a fractional nod and headed the two of them out.
"They going to be ok?" Jonathan asked.
Xander nodded. "Oz is pretty tough. And Willow's tougher than she seems." His voice became a bit more uncertain on that last note.
Across the room, near to the back corner, Amy made a pouncing motion by one of the tables, coming out grasping a wriggling and infuriated looking Hideyoshi-rat by the nape of the neck. "Got him!" Looking triumphant, her face fell when she noticed everyone's disarray. "Well, crap."
"Quite." Giles reached up to adjust his glasses. "Well put."
Looking around for something to do with the furiously struggling rodent, Amy's gaze landed on several empty display cages on the back shelves under the windows. Taking her prize over there, she opened one with her free hand, stuffing the Hideyoshi-rat inside and shutting the cage door firmly. Picking it up with both hands, she carried it over to join them.
"Somehow, I'm finding that rather poetic," Giles remarked, looking down into the cage. "It looks rather better on him than it did on Buffy, I must say."
"I'm thinking he needs an exercise wheel," Amy said, grinning down at the rodent.
"Hmm." Cordelia gave the caged rat a distinctly unsympathetic look. "And one of those little feeders with warfarin in the seed mix," she suggested.
"Ouch," Tor and Heidi exchanged faintly alarmed looks. Taking Heidi from Tamara to support her on his own shoulder, Tor looked askance at Cordelia. "I'm making a note here: do not piss off the cheerleaders. It's bad for your health."
"Damn straight," Cordelia flashed a sincerely venomous grin at him. Sighing heavily, she looked at Xander and lifted one of Faith's arms. "Let's get her up. I-we need to get out of here."
Xander nodded, then winced and gave out a slight groan as he shifted his weight. Tor put down a hand as Tamara took Xander's other and they hauled him unsteadily to his feet as Cordelia half stood with the unconscious slayer supported across one shoulder. Taking Faith's other arm across his shoulder, Xander slipped an arm around her waist, helping to support her weight between them. "Always amazes me how she's really such a tiny girl, all in all," he said.
"Are you quite certain the two of you can manage?" Giles asked, eying the somewhat battered looking trio with an uncertain expression.
"Yeah. We got it, Giles." Cordelia regarded the two pack members evenly, cocking her head slightly. "Twice in a week or so. I really do need to thank you two."
"No, you really don't," Heidi said. Tor shook his head.
"Can't let the Boss's mate get taken down," he said. "It's not right."
"Mate, huh." Cordelia met Xander's eyes over Faith's head with a bemused look. Xander's eyes widened a bit, and he shook his head with a rueful sounding laugh, shrugging with his off shoulder.
"Oooh. As I live and breathe," an unpleasantly familiar voice cut across the quiet discussion from near the lab's doorway. Everyone looked up, startled, to see Principal Snyder standing just inside the entrance, arms folded and a distinctly unpleasant gleam lighting his eyes. Fixing the cluster of teens - and one librarian - with an avuncular gaze, he nodded slowly as a shark's grin spread over his lips. "I always knew that if I were to bide my time well, I'd catch all of you assorted miscreants red handed."
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After a brief frozen moment, everyone's paralysis broke. Tucking the tranquilizer rifle under his arm like a swagger stick, Giles cleared his throat, stepping forward to peer down at the diminutive administrator with a distinctly unpleasant expression.
"Ah. Mr. Snyder - just the fellow I was ah-about to go about looking for," Giles said.
"Really." Snyder cocked his head, an expression of deep, or at least deeply fake, interest crossing his features. "By all means, Mr. Giles, please do enlighten and entertain me with whatever improvised explanation you've just conjured up for why I have a distraught cheerleader fleeing the school in tears, another fleeing in a state of, shall I say, marked disrepair, a shattered doorway here, and a trashed Biology lab?" He paused briefly, looking over the assembled group with interest, no doubt tallying additional oddities, and adding, "And violations of California 'weapons on campus' Federal ordinances? You cannot possibly imagine the depths of the anticipation with which I await your version of events."
"Oh, I am quite certain I can," Giles said, smoothly. Snyder's raised eyebrow taking in the swagger-stick dart rifle under his arm and the matching one that Tamara was - unsuccessfully - trying to conceal behind her caused him to falter momentarily, a nonplussed expression crossing Giles face.
"Oh! What should I do with our specimen, Mr. Giles?" Amy asked brightly, stepping forward with the caged Hideyoshi-rat. Jonathan nodded energetically, stepping up next to her and fixing Giles with an expectant look.
"Specimen?" Snyder peered at the cage. Amy gave him a vigorous nod, thrusting the cage out at him. Chittering viciously, the Hideyoshi-rat stood at the bars, baring an impressive looking dentition. Jumping back slightly, Snyder aimed a finger at the cage. "Tha-that's a rat! A big rat!"
"Why yes, actually," Giles remarked. "A rather impressive and unusual specimen of Rattus Argentiventus, I believe."
"Rattus Argentiventer," Jonathan corrected.
"Err, Quite," Giles adjusted his glasses, peering down at the cage with a clinical expression. "Argentiventer. Miss Kendall and Ms. err, Breckenridge were rather startled upon encountering it near here, necessitating our attempts to subdue and capture it and its cohorts." He rather negligently waved the tranquilizer rifle about the biology lab, causing Synder to violently flinch away as the muzzle crossed over him in passing.
"R-ra-rattus Argentiver?" Snyder stammered, backpedaling from the suddenly fey looking Brit - and the rat cage.
"Argentiventer," Jonathan supplied in a helpful tone, nodding vigorously. "Oriental Rice-field Rat." Tamara covertly shot him an impressed look and he reddened slightly.
"Yes. Precisely," Giles said. "We were on our way just now to the library to dial up the err, Board of Health before looking you up to inform you of our find."
"B-bo-board of Health?" Snyder shrank back a few inches more, eying the cage with even stronger distaste.
"And the California Fish and Game Service," Jonathan supplied, nodding decisively. Snyder fixed him with decidedly jaundiced expression as he added, "And the Department of Agriculture."
"Department of Agriculture?!?" Snyder's eyebrows shot up and he looked worriedly between the two males. A number of people behind Giles, Amy, and Jonathan quietly smothered grins and stifled snickers.
Jonathan shrugged. "Non-indigenous species. Someone had to have introduced them here." He grinned, adding, "Illegally."
"Quite so, Mr. Levinson," Giles remarked. "All in all, a remarkable find. Unprecedented to locate an infestation in such a locale."
"Ahem." Snyder drew himself up, clasping his hands behind his back. He regarded the small group distastefully and with a rather skeptical air. "Infestation?"
Amy'd head bobbed enthusiastically, her grin widening. "Infestation. You never find just one rat - where you see one, there's a nest."
"Nest?!?" Snyder squeaked, his eyes darting about nervously. Xander quietly bit down on his forearm behind Giles back, his eyes widening alarmingly. Wrenching his gaze around, Snyder eyed Giles' and Tamara's dart rifles with an appraising glance. "Air rifles?"
"Air rifles," Giles agreed.
Gazing at the still woozy looking Tor and the slumped Faith, Snyder waved aimlessly in their direction, "And... "
"Tranquilizer mishap," Giles intoned, pushing up his glasses on his nose. "Quite tragic, actually." Cordelia's eyes widened and she hastily stuffed the edge of her hand between her teeth and bit down, stifling hysterical giggles.
"Well," Synder nodded decisively. "You people certainly seem to have matters in hand, then. I'm seeing no reason to be involving the Board of Health - or Agriculture - in this."
"Uh, I dunno," Jonathan said, slowly. "Non-indigenous invasive species. California is pretty adamant about being informed about threats to agriculture..."
"Nonsense!" Synder made a scoffing noise. Waving dismissively at Giles and Tamara, he shook a finger at Jonathan. "Absolutely no need to involve authorities in what's no doubt a minor problem that's easily taken care of by the err, specialists at hand. Am I right?"
"No need whatsoever," Giles said, his expression bland.
"Exactly! Do carry on," Snyder bounced once on his toes, turning towards the doorway. "I'll expect a full report on this Monday, Mr. Giles. A full report." Head up, he strutted out arrogantly, his footsteps rapidly echoing down the hall and away.
"Very full. A veritable blivet." Giles removed his glasses with a sigh, "You bloody tosser."
Unable to contain themselves any more, Cordelia burst out snickering helplessly along with Xander. "Oh, that was priceless," she said.
"Could have just paid him off with some gold-pressed Latinum," Xander remarked.
"Huh. Geeks rule," Tor remarked. "Whoda thunk it?"
"I'm seeing that," Tamara said. "Nice job."
"Indeed," Giles favored a grinning Amy and a furiously blushing Jonathan with a distinctly approving look. "Excellent job of thinking on one's feet, you two."
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Outside, Xander slumped in near exhaustion against the building front, supporting Faith against him with an arm around her waist as Cordelia sighed tiredly. Giles, the two pack members, and the others had stayed behind briefly to gather up any remaining gear and books, Mr. Hideyoshi's clothing, the remnants of his cuff links, and whatever other evidences were left from the struggle.
Cordelia eased her shoulder from under Faith's, glancing worriedly at her. Shaking her head slightly, she gave Xander a speculative look, and then slowly, deliberately, placed her hands on his shoulders and gave him a deep and emphatic kiss.
"Wow," he said when she broke away finally. "What was that for?"
"For coming in after us," she said, her eyes serious. "For not giving us up. I'll let you pass that to Oz, 'cause Willow would probably freak if I thanked him like that." A grin tugging at her lips, she smacked him solidly on the chest with her open palm. Her grin broadened, "And that was in case you get to thinking you liked the new demure Cordelia. She is so not coming back. Ever."
"Ow." Xander laughed, shaking his head. "Nope. Not me. I like the One True Original Cordy." Capturing her hand, he entwined his fingers between hers. "Accept no substitutes."
With a groan, Faith stirred under Xander's arm, her head coming up. Her eyes shot open, blinking, and she pushed off from the wall abruptly.
"Hey," Cordelia gave her a concerned look. "Welcome back."
"Yeah." Faith pushed her hair back from her face with an abrupt gesture, letting her hands fall to her side. She fixed Xander with a peculiar expression, her eyes darkening. "Did I hurt anyone bad?"
"No." Xander shook his head slightly. "Not so much."
Nodding slowly, she looked to Cordelia. "You ok?"
"Yes. No. Not so much," Cordelia gave a slight shrug, looking uncomfortable. "Will be."
"Yeah." Faith nodded again, looking away. As Xander slowly raised a hand and reached out to touch her cheek, she leaned back, not quite lifting her own to block his. "No. Don't." She took a step back, not meeting his eyes. "Just... don't."
Letting his hand fall, Xander let a slow breath out, and nodded. He gave Cordelia a helpless look.
"Whatever it was... " Cordelia started, then trailed off. She shook her head, locking eyes with Faith. "It wasn't you. Not really."
"Right." Faith nodded. Shoving her hands in her back pockets, she looked away. "Look, I can't do this. Not right now," she took a deep breath and met Xander's eyes evenly. "I just... can't."
Turning on her heel, she strode down the school steps and away, head down. Xander frowned, straightening from the side of the entranceway a bit.
"No." Putting her palm to his chest, over his heart, Cordelia pushed back lightly and shook her head. "I think she needs some alone time," she said, biting at her lower lip. "I can relate." Turning to look after the disappearing Slayer, she asked, "Was it bad?"
"You... " Xander broke off, biting back a giggle with a helpless expression. He spread his hands, "Started to say you have no idea, but you do, don't you?"
"Yeah." Nodding seriously, she added, "Not specifics maybe, but... yeah." Looking up at him, she frowned slightly, "We are going to be in therapy for life, you so know this, don't you?"
"Hah!" A harsh bark of laughter startled itself out of him and he leaned back, guffawing helplessly. "Yeah. But we're never gonna find a therapist that'll believe us."
"Oh, we are so screwed," Cordelia agreed, snickering. The snicker took on a slightly hysterical edge and her voice broke. Xander squeezed her should comfortingly, looking miserable.
They broke off conversation as the others straggled out of the building in an equally exhausted looking state. Giles nodded to the two of them, his hands in his front pockets. He gave Cordelia a curious and rather abstractedly concerned appraisal.
"I must say," he remarked, "You are looking much closer to your usual self, Miss Chase."
"Cordelia," she waved it off tiredly. "It's been the equivalent of a formal introduction."
Startled laughter burst out of Giles, and his eyes crinkled at her. "Why yes, so it has."
"And yeah," Cordelia nodded, her eyes bright. "All dispossessed and everything."
"Excellent," Giles said. He looked about, his expression curious, but guarded, "Err, Faith?"
Xander hunched into his jacket a bit. "She... " he made a vague gesture, "Wanted some alone time."
"Ah." Giles nodded, pushing his glasses up a bit farther on his nose and sighing tiredly. "I see." Tamara, Amy, Jonathan and the others gathered up around, blinking at the outside world, Amy still carrying the rat cage.
"All right, Boss," Tor said, smirking at Xander. "We're gone." Xander gave him and Heidi a tired wave and a nod.
"Hrmm." Giles' gaze on them caused the two former Pack members to glance at him curiously. Removing his glasses, Giles regarded them while absently beginning to polish his lenses. "It occurs to me that we quite need to have a talk at some point."
Raising an eyebrow, Tor glanced at Heidi who cocked her head and fixed Giles with a flat, calculating gaze. "No, we really don't."
Giles gave her a nonplussed look, opening his mouth to begin a remark or statement. Tor met his eyes evenly and directly, cutting across him, "No offense, Mr. Giles, but we spent the last year and a half coming to terms with everything that happened," he said. His lips curled in something that might or might not have been a smile. "Without your help, inquiries, assistance, or even casual fucking interest."
"Kyle and Rhonda never did come to terms with it, not really." Heidi's grin was a mirthless scimitar curve of her lips as Giles' mouth closed into a hard line. "Time for you to offer 'a little chat' done came and gone long ago," she finished.
"Yup." Tor nodded lazily. "Xan ever needs to, he knows where to find us. We take care of our own," he added, his eyes sweeping with equal laziness across Xander and Cordelia inclusively, then back over Giles. "And you're not one of them."
"Wow." Tamara's gaze followed the two of them as they ambled down the front steps of the school, Tor's arm across Heidi's shoulders. "Those two are intense."
"Uh," Jonathan shivered. "Those two are freaking scary."
"Yeah. Seriously," Cordelia agreed, tucking into Xander's side. She glanced sidelong with some amusement at Giles, who's glasses polishing had taken on a furious intensity as he looked away.
"Ahem." Giles gaze fixed upon Xander, who put his hands up, palm out.
"Don't look at me," he said. "I didn't do it."
"Uh.... need us to help put away books or anything, Mr. Giles?" Jonathan asked, looking distinctly uncomfortable. An ominous rumbling sound came from the vicinity of his midsection and he looked around, wide eyed.
"No, that's quite all right," Giles said absently, still examining Xander with an intent gaze. "I'll get them sorted." He paused, finally looking away from Xander and Cordelia to the remaining three, "However, I would like to speak with the three of you."
"Ah." Cordelia blew wisps of hair from her eyes. "Why don't we table the post-Slay discussion until morning and have a meeting?" She grinned, "Let Amy and Tam drag the geek off and feed him before he implodes or something."
"I never did eat lunch," Jonathan admitted, reddening.
"Hah. Quite," Giles gave her a rueful look and a small smile. "Very well, shoo then. We can do the postmortem sometime tomorrow, as it were."
"Sounds good," Cordelia nodded, hooking Xander's arm with her own. "C'mon, hero - you can see me home." Meeting Giles' eyes with a disconcertingly steady look, she added, "Thank you as well, Giles."
Replacing his glasses on his nose, Giles glanced after the other teens. "Quite all right, Cordelia. You should really save that for your friends - I fear I contributed very little to the resolution of this affair."
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