A/N: So here is the next installment. It is a very short story compared to my other ones, but I do hope it is just as entertaining.
Haruhi sucked in a deep breath before entering the club room. I can do this, she told herself. She opened the doors and walked in.
"Haru-uhi-i," a familiar voice squealed. Tamaki started to run towards her when he suddenly ran into a wall. Tamaki crashed to the floor with a bruised nose. "What was that?" Tamaki looked up to see Mori standing in front of him. "Why did you step in my way?"
"Because I asked him to," Haruhi said. The host club members looked at her for an explanation. Haruhi sighed, "I asked Mori-senpai to protect me from you, Tamaki, because I am sick and cannot be hugged tightly or spun around in my condition."
"Mother, our Haruhi is ill. Make her feel better," Tamaki demanded.
Haruhi just ignored him, along with the rest of the host club. "I have an announcement to make. I am pregnant."
It became quiet, like the silence of a receded ocean before the tsunami hits.
"WHAT," Tamaki shouted. "HOW ARE YOU PREGNANT!"
"Well you see there is this guy I really like and we…." Haruhi was cut off by Tamaki's wailing.
"NOOOOOOOOOOOO! I don't want to hear THAT! I know how babies are made thank you."
"Oh, didn't think you knew. Sorry."
"I demand to know who the father is," Tamaki continued.
"Haruhi," Hunny called.
"Yes Hunny-senpai," Haruhi answered.
"Who is the father?"
"That information will not be revealed until after the finals. My graduation is only a few months away and I don't want any distractions."
"You could have just told us about your pregnancy after your graduation," Kyouya said.
Haruhi just stared at him, "So are you telling me that none of you would have figured it out if I didn't tell you?"
"The only person who would not have known would be Tamaki, because he is an idiot. At least that way you would not be bothered by him."
"True, but then the rest of you would just be watching me, waiting for me to tell you," Haruhi was starting to get a headache.
"It's okay Haruhi, we will keep the idiot away from you," Hikaru said.
"Yeah, no one will bother you with us around," Kaoru said.
"I'm still not telling you two the father's name," Haruhi glared at them. She turned towards the changing room to get dressed for the new theme, United States 50's theme, when she was blocked by Hunny, who seemed to be a little taller than her. That's not right, Haruhi looked down to see that Mori was on his knees and Hunny was sitting on top of his shoulders.
"Haruhi," Hunny said seriously, "If you need any help, do not be afraid to ask me or Mori-chan. We will always be there to help you"
"Ah," Mori said in confirmation.
"Thanks you two, now may I pleased get changed?"
Mori stood up and carried Hunny back to his table of sweets.
"Is no one else curious as to who the father is," Tamaki asked when Haruhi left.
"We will know at the graduation," Kyouya replied.
"Why must we wait till the graduation? I want to know now," Tamaki cried.
"All right me lord," Kaoru said.
"We will tell you who the father is," Hikaru finished.
"For a price of course," the twins snickered in unison as they both stood on either side of Tamaki.
"Name it," Tamaki said with determination in his eyes.
"First you have to…" Kaoru leaned into Tamaki's ear to whisper instructions.
"Then you have to…" Hikaru leaned into Tamaki's other ear and whispered more instructions.
When the twins were both done talking in Tamaki's ear, Tamaki rushed out of the room to gather the things needed to complete the tasks given him.
After club activities have ended
Hikaru stood up to address the club members, "please stay and take a seat in front of this mini stage that Tamaki has prepared."
"He is going to put on a small show for everyone's entertainment," Kaoru explained.
What now? Haruhi thought as she took a seat that said 'RESERVED FOR HARUHI'.
Everyone else took their respectful seats, Hikaru sitting next to Haruhi. Kaoru pressed play on some CD player and took the seat on the other side of Haruhi. The red curtain rose from the mini stage to reveal Tamaki sitting on a chair center stage wearing netted thigh highs held up by a garter belt, ruby red 4-inch stilettos, a black leather mini skirt, and a ruby red leather bra. He also wore red lipstick that was all smeared, dark black eye shadow, and pink blush. He looked like he stepped out of the 'Rocky Horror Picture Show'. Next to him was a dancing pole. The song started to play and Tamaki started to dance to the music as seductively as possible, but in 4-inch heals he was just stumbling around. Then he tried to pull dance, he didn't really know what to do, so he just kept spinning around on it.
Haruhi just stared with her mouth open while Kaoru and Hikaru were giving catcalls and throwing money on the stage. Kyouya had a camera in his hands and taking as many pictures as possible. Mori had put a blindfold on Hunny and placed a plate of cookies in front of him to keep him distracted.
All the while Tamaki kept prancing around the stage. Sometimes the skirt would hike up enough that they could see Tamaki was wearing a thong. I am scarred for life. This image will never leave my mind even if I want to forget it.
"He is not a very good dancer in heels is he," Kaoru spoke.
"I suppose he could take them off, but then it won't be as entertaining," Hikaru replied.
"That is true, I guess they stay on," both Kaoru and Hikaru started to laugh uncontrollably.
Haruhi couldn't take her eyes off Tamaki. As horrible as it was to watch she just could not look away, like a car crash. She would forever hate the Hitachiin twins for this.
After the show
Tamaki walked up to the twins, "I think I figured out who the father is."
"Really," the twins questioned together.
"Yes. The father is me," Tamaki said confidently.
"If you were the father," Kaoru started.
"We would have to kill you on principle," Hikaru ended.
Kyouya wacked Tamaki on the head with a book he was holding. "Where did you come up with that conclusion?"
"At the private host club party a few weeks ago I drank much more that I was used to, so I must have ravished poor Haruhi in my intoxicated state. The poor sweetheart, I must go comfort her for my blunder." Before Tamaki could go and comfort Haruhi, he was knocked down by Kaoru and Hikaru's fists.
"You foolish King," Kaoru said.
"Do you really think we would have let you touch Haruhi," Hikaru asked.
"You were all over Kyouya telling him how much he means to you and how he is your only true friend."
"You even tried to kiss him a couple times."
"We had to call your driver to take you home before Kyouya murdered you."
"Well Haruhi must have snuck into the car to see me off because she was worried, that was when I ravished her," Tamaki concluded, earning him another smack from Kyouya's book.
"You are not the father," Kyouya told him.
"How do you know," Tamaki asked.
Kyouya ignored him and walked out of the club room.
Gears started to work in Tamaki's head, "It's you isn't it?"
A/N: I guess I shall end it here. I laugh just thinking about Tamaki dressed in drag. Anyway, have you figured out who the father is yet? REVIEW PLEASE