Kendall knew that he shouldn't have gone to the picnic that day; he should have taken Logan and ran away with him and never looked back like was the plan. But he just couldn't pass up the chance to give his Coco an experience on their first night together. As he got to know Logan, he found out that he missed out a lot on life and when he found out that the brunette had never been to a concert, Kendall almost fainted. Who hasn't been to a concert? Or maybe it was because he just wanted to relish every experience with him. And though it seemed like it was worth it at the time, he was starting to regret it now. He was regretting it as he maneuvered his boyfriend through the church event. And maybe, maybe he stayed for it just to say good-bye. Good-bye to this town and these people and Jo and his Father. Little did he know that it wouldn't be that simple? In their relationship, what was?

Kendall didn't want to take Logan with him to the picnic, but they didn't exactly have a place to stay and the brunette was glued to the blonde. And he loved when Logan was so clingy, but he couldn't tell if it was out of fear or love. And if it was fear, it broke his heart.

"If I could escape," Logan sang under his breath while clinging to Kendall's side to the horror of the church, "I would but first of all let me say. I must apologize for act-,"

"Whatcha singin Logie," Kendall said smiling back at the petrified teen next to him, "It was really pretty. You're really pretty."

"Kendall, what does that have to do with anything," Logan said with a puzzled look on his face at the blonde.

"Wow, snappy now are we," Kendall responded with a smirk; Logan just being by his side could make his day one-hundred percent better, even if he was here, "I was just saying you should sing more, plus, you look really hot today."

"Kendall, I'm a mess."

"A hot-mess."

"Ha, very funny, but I'm not sure if this is the time for the flirtyness."

"Why not."

"Aren't we in the house of god or something like that?"

"Yeah, that's why it's perfect; we're in the house of god and you're my little angel," he started to kiss the brunettes neck lightly, tickling his hips in the first place to get him to lean into it and laugh.

"Ka, Kendall, ssssstopp, not nnnnnowww," Logan pleaded laughing, but the blonde didn't care; he wanted everyone there to know. Because they'd never see them again.

"Um, Kendall," Jo said with a scowl, her arms crossed tightly around her chest, "who's this with you; a very sick patient."

"Oh hey Jo," Kendall said lightly, in a very good mood, "I just wanted everyone to meet my boyfriend."

"Ha, very funny," the blonde girl retorted with eyes on fire, "But, you shouldn't bring sluts to church, it's quite rude."

"Shut up Jo," Kendall said with his teeth barred, making sure that everyone sitting around eating could hear each word decisively. He wasn't up for faking anymore. For the first time in a long time, he was ready to bare all and be real. "You know this is my boyfriend. Logan, remember."

"Still with that absolutely. Hilarious. Sense. Of Humor," Jo responded, doing her best to fake an unconvincing smile.

"Cut the Shit Jo," Kendall was getting frustrated with the fact that whenever she decided something wasn't real, she'd act that way, "Does it make you feel better for me to say that I like dick. Huh. Better."

"Kendall, there are people here," she replied, obviously furious.

"I'm not to fucking worried one of these ninety-two year olds is gonna do anything anyway; worst case, I give one a heart attack."

"This isn't the time nor place for this and you know that better than any."

"Yeah, I do know that, and that's why I decided to do this now; no more denying it Josephine, your boyfriends gay. Gay. Gay. Gay. Fucking Gay."

"Fine, you want me to acknowledge the fact that you'd flaunt your stupid little whore in front of my face," Kendall didn't realize what he'd unleashed exactly, but Jo was no longer capable of being stopped. "That you could somehow one day ruin my life for this little piece of shit boy; you can't even pick someone that I could be jealous of for a good reason. No, no, you can't pick someone tall, or beautiful or rich, so at least I feel bad with purpose. No, you fucking pick a psychotic, sickly little fairy boy. What; I wasn't feminine enough for you so you pick him. I don't even fuckin know. What does he do for you? What, he gives a great blowjob. Can take it real deep up the ass. Why him. Why would you pick someone in this world like him? Over me!"

"Do you hear yourself right now," Kendall shouted back into her face, "How selfish are you Jo. How-,"

"It's your turn to cut the selfish bull crap," she screamed back, "I gave everything, everything, up for you. I missed summers and opportunities to have real friends and a real life so that you'd be happy for once. I've been giving up a promising life to stand by your side as the perfect girl friend. I became a mother-fucking nun just to please you and it was never enough. You know how many scholar-ships I gave up to be with you. Oh right, you never even listened when I wanted to talk about that."

"Oh," was all Kendall could manage in response to all of that because it was all very true; every time he asked her, she'd give him one-hundred and ten percent. It was part of what he thought made their relationship work for so long.

"Yeah, 'oh,' because you have the nerve to let me do all of that crap while you have something on the side. And of all things, a boy. After all the rhetoric you'd make me listen to from your dad about the poison of the homosexual choice. I took every ounce of it while you were apparently off with one of your tarts. So I have the right to be absolutely pissed. I have the right to own you. Because for so long, I let you own me."

But what no one expected was what came out of Logan, "I'm so sorry Jo," he said, throwing himself onto the ground in front of her, "I'm so sa- sorry *sob*, I'll leave, I'll go away, I'm just so sorry." He grabbed her knees to balance himself while tears rolled down his cheeks, but Jo showed no apathy. She was upset and in a swift move, she kicked the brunette off of her, hard onto the ground.

"Get your whore off of me," she said with barred teeth, "He doesn't know me and I sure as hell, don't know him." He cried harder when he hit the ground, the dust around him quickly rising into the air. Kendall seemed to be able to feel every blow.

"Look, it's not enough for you to embarrass him in public," Kendall yelled, "but he apologizes and you have the nerve to hurt him back."

"I'm fucking sorry faggot," she hollered at the sobbing boy on the ground, "maybe grow a spine and that kind of shit couldn't happen to you."

"Shut the fuck up," Kendall yelled back and the scream off they were getting in was getting very intense, "Don't ever even address him again. Got that. You don't know him. You know me, so if you're gonna take your shit out; pick the right person. Fucking take it out on me, not him."

"Oh I'm sorry, did I offend your fudge-packing boy-toy," she responded, "or are you the cock-sucker. Doubt it after seeing this little shit, but you seem to have a lot of surprises for us right now. So why don't you tell me, I'm sure you could explain it all to us."

Kendall was quickly losing his calm when he realized that Logan was gone, and when he stopped to follow were the soft trail of footsteps went too, he saw that they led into the forest. And at the edge of the forest were the rapids.

Logan didn't exactly know how to react when Jo was freaking out on him and Kendall, but when he heard what Kendall had done to her, all he could do was feel sorry. He never wanted to be the home wrecker and that was exactly what he was. So when he apologized, he was only hoping for just a little bit of forgiveness; of recognition that he was sorry. He knew it was selfish, but he needed it to live with himself. To live with the fact that he was destroying her and Kendall's lives, so when he felt the cold black boot kick him off of her, he realized what she was saying. There would be no forgiveness and sure as hell, there would be no acknowledgement. And so he just couldn't stay there any longer. His whole life, he'd merely run away from problems until they crippled him and he had every intention of escaping before he could no longer try. And then he noticed the nearby woods.

So while they were fighting, he ran as fast as he could. He ran like he was being chased by every monster out of his nightmares that was threatening to come to life and destroy him. Logan had never been fast; he never was even considered a good athlete, but at the moment, he felt like he was floating on air. To him, the trees seemed simply like green wind and the airlessness of the moment finally made him feel free. And for so very long, he'd simply wanted freedom. And that feeling could have lasted forever if it wasn't for the fact that he was absolutely paying no attention to where he was going. And that's when he felt everything tumble down on him. When the limbs hit his legs and tore his jeans, he didn't notice at first, but for some reason he did on this particular one. And lying on that forest floor was no good feeling for him. But no, he couldn't turn around now, he was just too far, so he got up, nursing his wounded leg while limping forward as fast as he could to continue into the great unknown. But he started to feel the fear of what the unknown particularly was crash in on him.

What was he doing? Where was he going in particular? With no survival skills and already an injury, how did he plan to survive out here? Did he plan to survive? Was this a big suicide attempt? When were the voices coming to work their magic and guide him finally? By thinking that, did he want them to return? How could Kendall ever love him when he had a perfect Jo right in front of him? Had Kendall ever truly said he loved him? Did Kendall even care for him other than as a play thing? Was he simply his try-on? A toy that he would return as soon as he decided it had officially broke?

In a particularly painful moment, Logan broke down and fell on his knees while the blood from the wound started to double and cried out into the general unknown, "I'm Not Your Toy" and just then, he heard the ring of church bells. The distinctive chime to signal that the hour had turned and god was still here. Hah, what god Logan wondered. What god would create something as pathetic and weak as him? If there ever was a god, Logan was obviously one of his hideous mistakes. Doomed to wonder the earth lonely and mindless. And the brunette never wanted to be that.

When he was at the home, he had friends. He had good friends like Fender and Jennifer and apparently Stephanie and medicine and food and happiness. Why the hell had he ever left? Logan was silently contemplating this while his weak legs guided him forward, past the wringing church bells and down just a little further to a ledge with a tiny, white lake next to it. Well, it was more like a stream because it wasn't exactly a river, but it ran and it ran fast. If someone were to fall in and say 'they couldn't swim,' Logan was sure they'd die. They might even die on impact just because of the crushing speed and rocks and so on.

And what do you know; Logan had never learned to swim. But he'd never learned a lot of things, like how to be social, or make friends, or like the right things, or impress the right people. No, instead Logan Mitchell was the loser who no one liked; who was helpless and needy. And that's when it all suddenly fell into place for him. He could get rid of everyone else's pain through one simple move. Who could it really hurt? Kendall never really said he loved him and if he was gone, Jo could be happy. Everything would fall back in its natural order and he wouldn't have to worry about trying to stay healthy anymore. How could the voices ever get him if he was gone? It would lighten Mrs. Halls load and it would make life so much easier for the doctor that had helped him so much.

But something inside of him screamed for him to be rational. It told him that he would be missed; that lots of people truly loved him and that he wasn't worthless. That he had a great future and one day, long ahead, maybe he'd be married to Kendall and live happily ever after. All he had to do was get away from the water's edge and go back to safety. And he could do that, couldn't he. He had learned to save himself. But then, a booming voice appeared from behind him, almost startling him into the water.

"He doesn't love you," the tall man behind him said, dressed in a pastor's usual uniform, "How could anyone ever love something like you. Look at you, standing on the edge like someone with more issues than they can count. Then again, I remember you clearly, so I guess I should know how many issues you have exactly."

And then an all too familiar voice spat back, "Finally, someone has decided to tell this homo the truth," and Logan knew it was over. The jig was up. Now, the only way to silence his head would be an ending dive into the freezing cold water below. And the instant thrill of death crossed his mind again.

Author's Note: Kendall just has this ability to make everything perfect before completely fucking it up. And with this, he's about to seriously screw it all up when he's so frickin close. Maybe a Big Time Death? Who knows, well, I do, but that's not the point, the point is there is another update tomorrow and you'll find out just what's gonna happen. So review and tell me how upset you are that I'm teasing you with Logan on the cliff's edge. Who knows? *possible spoiler* Kendall could get shot (Jo is pissed) or *possible spoiler* the Pastor could have a heart attack. Comment and do all that wonderful stuff. Ahhhhh! Don't hate me, tragedy hasn't struck, YET! Luv ya. XoXo