Wow, I got more than 25 reviews! Thank you so much! I still want more so I can have some creative criticism. Please comment with your ideas and maybe i'll incorporate it with my plans.

Please send more reviews or I'll be even later with the updates. Updates give me motivation to write!

Thanks to:

Stesuna the Dragon : Jazz will be in a few future chapters just to give you a heads up!

Elita One : I was thinking the father/daughter would be with Optimus and Bee would be the older brother. Ironhide is the uncle but read the chapter and find out exactly how Ratchet feels.

Thanks to these two people who reviewed! This chapter has been revised!

Chapter 6

The Realization

It has been a few days since Ratchet had to patch up Nexia's shoulder and it is healing teeth marks hit a minor vein so that is why all the blood had been lost. He had wrapped a nice bandage around her shoulder and told her not to do any extensive lifting for a while, though he wasn't sure that she would listen to him. She seemed to be slightly defiant and spending more and more time at the Base. The Lennoxes didn't seem to mind – she stayed there every other weekend so it was like her second home.

He sighed, putting his metallic forehead in his hands, and tried to block out all the sounds that surrounded him. The medic had been slowly slipping away into insanity trying to get the image of the magical winged girl out of his processor; it was impossible since she had made friends with everyone in the base - no mech could imagine life without her bright smile.

He can't help but enjoy her company. The silence was a comfortable one since they were both people who loved silence. Sure, they enjoyed a good conversation, but sometimes a person needs to learn to be quiet in order to fully enjoy the wonders around them. He, however, didn't notice the small subtle sidelong looks that she would send him every so often; a blush would usually form across her pale features when she was caught.

He enjoyed the soft lullaby of her voice, softly caressing his audio receptors and making his spark quiver with longing to hear every word she speaks. She was one of the only humanoid-like people that actually understood his ramblings on random subjects, interjecting her own thoughts about certain subjects. He savored her opinions; they were actually useful and un-childlike.

The weary old medic couldn't help but stare at her enchanting wings, watching the strong muscles stretch and retract whenever she adjusted them. the They created a sort of serenity around her - a calming peacefulness if you would. The gorgeous and vibrant color glistening whenever the light from the Medical Bay hit them just right made him want to stare at her for the rest of eternity.

Ratchet knew he shouldn't but he couldn't help but watch as every strand of her hair blew in the wind or the air from his air conditioner, gently flowing in the small breeze across her face. He continued the staring as she brushed the tiny strands out of her face and behind her ear, making her look like a cute little child.

He stared at the way her molten pools, which she called her eyes, shone in the light and the infectious smiles that always adorned her face. The way her attitude reminded him of someone so long ago that was not around to comfort him the way she did before. He used to think of his old friend every day…but now his processor was overridden with thoughts of Nexia.

Ratchet shook his head sharply, cursing for thinking of the one thing that ached his spark; the memory was sending small shocks of dull pain through his body until he could bear it no longer. He stood, searching for a way to block the happy yet painful memories that were flooding his processors, not wanting to relive the horrifying moments in his previously happy life.

He stood, looking through the extensive medical library and finally took out his set of medical dictionaries on human data, hoping to get his mind off the Phoenix. He got about halfway through his data on molecular biology before his processor wandered back to the winged girl whom made him smile like an idiot. How his spark clenched every time she looked at him and how she always seemed to catch his optics. How he wanted to spend every waking moment with her, just to enjoy the sight of her.

He sighed in disdain. He knew that either way he was in quite a fix; he was unsure of the winged girl's feelings for him and was unconvinced that he deserved to be in a stable relationship.

Was he out of his processor? Why did this one particular girl remind him of his former crush, Moonracer? Her somewhat shy personality with some spunky moments buried underneath was an almost exact replica of the assistant medic. Her small smile barely containing the excitement hidden deep so one would have to wonder: what is she smiling at? Or more importantly: Who is she smiling at?

Ratchet's bright blue optics activated, unaware that he had shut them off, and he admitted that he had grown extremely fond of the little femme. He also had to admit that the loss of his best friend had dulled slightly in his spark when the new object of his affections was in the room. He sighed and stood, replacing the holo-texts on his bookshelf and running a hand down his faceplates in an attempt to knock him to his senses.

Could he have fallen for another so quickly after the loss of the one he cared so deeply for before? Could it be possible that she cared for him as well? Although they were not bonded and she did not know his feelings for her he still would have given his life for her. He supposed over time his feelings have faded, only to be reawakened by the little femme who was with them.

"Who am I kidding? I have a serious crush on her." he murmured quietly to himself, using human terms. He had given up denying the fact and was confused on how to act. He had never had a serious relationship before but his spark cried out for intimacy.

"I'm in deep crap." he said, smacking himself on the forehead. He continued his use of human terms as Optimus had them scan the World Wide Web. It was useful to talk like humans if they were ever in need of their services.

He finally realized that when Ironhide called over his communication system he was terribly worried about her. He was also extremely jealous over Bumblebee when he began comforting his Nexia. Wait a minute…when had he started referring to Nex as 'his'? Oh, he had it bad for her.

"She's so perfect…and I'm not. I don't deserve her. " he stated miserably, cursing himself for even thinking he been stood a chance. Why would someone as pure as Nexia want to be so emotionally attached to a medic who has seen so many horrors in his life?

"You don't deserve who?" a melodious voice questioned from behind him. The medic's optics darkened and he flinched, swirling around. He was ready to draw his saw out of subspace if anyone were to attack. He stood there for a few minutes, form poised, before he sensed there was no actual threat. His stance relaxed once the mech realized it was only Nexia but his faceplates warmed slightly once he gained his composure.

She giggled a little bit once she saw how he was embarrassed, causing him to sheepishly grin. Ratchet was incredibly happy that he changed his structure so that his facial plates couldn't change color. He looked at her and took in every feature that was possible.

Her cheeks gained so much color since they rescued her from her doomed fate. Her lips were curled into a small smile and her eyes were twinkling. Her skin was pale, much like a porcelain doll and her wings had returned to a healthy vermillion color. They were strong enough to hold her in the air for several hours and with a little more training she could last for days at a time.

"Oh, nothing. I was just mumbling to myself." he responded, hoping that she hadn't heard the whole conversation he was having with himself. She looked at him with a skeptical look but decided to drop the subject. The medic's business was his own, after all. She stretched her wings and flew up towards the top of his shelf, noticing how some of the data texts were out of order and his medical tools were out of alignment. That wasn't natural for the Autobot medic was extremely organized.

"Hey, Ratch?" she asked, turning back toward him while floating in mid-air. He turned towards her in his chair, sending a questioning look in her direction. He noticed she had her hair up in a tiny ponytail, her bangs hanging down in front of her eyes. A new look but it still made her extremely beautiful.

"Yes, Nex? What can I do for you?" he asked, using the nickname she gave everyone. She beamed at him, the shine in her eyes making him grin. His grin made her smile wider in return. It was contagious.

"Want me to help you clean up? It's incredibly messy in here." she asked, indicating at the mess surrounding her. He looked around also, lowering his head in embarrassment, and then looked up again, nodding. She smiled again, showing her white teeth, and settled down beside the giant tools. Nexia narrowed her eyes, determined to help the Autobot medic clean his Medical Bay office.

One by one she hefted them up as best she could, setting them down again in a proper order, strait as she could manage. She grabbed a rag from a nearby table and began spit-shining them, shining them up until they looked good as new. All it really took was a little bit of elbow grease.

Ratchet decided that it would be unfair to let her do all the work so he came up behind her, showing her the proper way to shine the tools without getting hurt. When they were done he went about showing her where to store them. Next, they tackled his shelf with the data pads inside his office, on the other side of the bay. His stack of data had to be brought from the desk in the bay itself and needed to be stored in its proper area.

Nexia giggled when Ratchet blew upon the many dusty volumes, the dust scattering around in the air. She sneezed, much to the amusement of the medic, and floated down toward the pile on his desk. More dust caught in her throat, clogging it up as she started to cough. Ratchet strode over quickly, tapping his finger on her back in order to help clear her throat.

"Are you alright?" he asked, feeling a little guilty since it was he who blew on the data pads in the first place. She nodded, changing the subject to one not as awkward.

"Do you miss doing your job?" she asked, indicating toward the open area of the Medical Bay. Since the Decepticon leader had been killed the remaining ones had scattered across the galaxy, much to the relief of the Autobots. Ratchet thought for a moment as he gathered up some of the reports on his desk, filing them away in the proper storage bin.

"I was created to be a medic and it is a job I love above all else. I am suited for it and I still fix Ironhide, Bumblebee, Optimus, Hound, Wheeljack, and myself when need be. Although the need has not arisen for such a while I am somewhat glad for the opportunity to be given a break. Besides, I get to spend some time with you." he said, feeling the heat rise in his cheek plates again. He hoped that she would not notice and was relieved when she turned away.

He didn't notice the fact that she turned away because she was blushing. She was glad that she was facing the opposite direction than he was or he would notice something was wrong with her. All was in vain because he started scanning her figure.

"Nex, are you alright? Your core temperature is now at 113 degrees. That is a dangerous level considering the normal humanoid temperature is around 98 degrees." Ratchet's worried voice cut through her thoughts like a butter knife. She turned, a small sprinkle of blush still on her face as she looked into his worried optics.

"Oh, I'm fine. Since my main element is fire my core body temperature is fairly high. Much higher than the normal core temperature than humans." she explained to an eager medic. Since Nexia was the only Phoenix left from the Golden Age of Cybertron he was ecstatic to learn anything about her. He stored that little bit of information deep within his processor as he smiled, nodding his thanks to her as they continued with their work.

They continued working for a few hours before they got tired, looking around the room to find if anything else was out of order. Once they were satisfied they decided to take a break, going back into the main part of the Medical Bay with the surgical berths. Nexia knew that Ratchet had not forgotten the little conversation he had with himself beforehand and she was determined to get the information she wanted. She just needed to subtly inquire about it.

"Who? Who do you not deserve?" Nexia asked again as she settled down upon his shoulder, smiling impishly. He didn't notice the sparkling twinkle in her eye. She sat down upon the edge of his shoulder, swinging her legs over the side, and looking down at his faceplates expectantly.

He sighed, knowing that she was stubborn, like Moonracer, and was going to drag the answer out of him one way or another. Ratchet decided to get it over with and mentally prepared his answer. He smiled sadly down at her as he sat back down in his overly large chair, and repositioned himself.

"I was just thinking about the past. My best friend, actually. You remind me so much of her." he said while shutting of his optics; he saw Moonracer's face in the darkness of his processor.

He activated his projector, a little disk on the side of his helm, concentrating on the image of his former crush. Nexia smiled wider as the image became apparent and he opened his optics again. Her eyes softened as she saw the miserable, or at least she thought it was miserable, look on the medic's face.

"What was her name?" the winged girl whispered gently, staring at the beautiful image of the femme. Nexia knew this was an extremely hard topic for Ratchet to talk about but she thought that the medic would feel better after he talked about it.

"Her name was…Moonracer." Ratchet replied in an equally quiet voice. The image thickened so that it stood three dimensional and about as tall as the winged girl looking upon it.

Nexia took the time that they were silent to examine the holograph's features. The femme was a beautiful shade of mint green, with metallic silver sparkles, and darker green highlights that ran down her arms and legs, wrapping around her torso as well.

Her optics were the familiar electric blue of the Autobots and a small, loving smile shone upon her faceplates. Her faceplates were a metallic silver and her appendages, like her hands and feet, were a deep blue.

"She's beautiful." Nexia commented, smiling up at the medic. He smiled back but she could tell that it masked some hidden pain. She looked down, biting her lip as Ratchet deactivated the image slowly - as if to keep the image in his processor forever.

They sat like that for a while, the comfortable silence drifting through the air. Soon, Nexia began to get antsy, the same question running through her mind. She finally gave up guessing and decided to ask the medic himself. It pained her so she had to know.

"Did you love her, Ratchet?" she questioned softly, looking like she was ready to start crying. He started in surprise, touched that she would care so much about a problem, let alone one that was his. He thought for a while before shaking his head no, optics softening when they landed on the winged girl.

"I did not love her, but I did for her deeply. If I had known her longer, maybe, but it was nowhere near the extreme of love." he responded, realizing that he, in fact, did not love Moonracer. He only thought he did because he wanted to find someone who would love him for who he was instead of for who he knew.

"How did she die? Or is it too painful for me to ask?" the winged girl asked, biting her lip. She knew that she was striding into unknown territory. She didn't know how to comfort someone who was in this kind of emotional turmoil. Ratchet thought back several thousand years ago, long before the Autobots lost the Allspark in space.

Ratchet clenched his jaw slightly, his spark aching at the inevitable question. He knew that she would ask eventually but it still hurt his spark to think about it. The Autobot medic thought back to the tragic day when his best friend died.

"Ratchet! We have to go deeper. They'll have a better chance at surviving if we get to them before they come to the Medical Tent!" the mint green femme said, sparkling blue optics pleading with the older and more experienced medic.

"No! We can't risk it. If we die then who will fix the injured mechs and femmes?!" the bright yellow mech exclaimed back, clenching his fists in irritation. He knew that the femme was right but he just didn't want to risk her safety.

"You know I'm right, Ratchet! If you won't come with me then I'm going alone!" Moonracer shouted as she shouldered a small blaster, running through the carnage of already deceased Autobots and Decepticons. The older medic didn't have time to say anything so he followed her, activating his saw from subspace.

"Moon! Wait!!" he shouted, eventually catching up with her. She smiled as she saw that he had followed her, turning back to the bloody mass of metallic bodies. They saw the first line of struggling and wounded bodies, racing and dodging energy blasts as they tried to reach the wounded.

They were almost there, Moonracer being just ahead of Ratchet since she was smaller and lighter, but suddenly there was a searing pain in his lower abdomen. It spread down his thigh, finally stopping at his knee. The wounded medic collapsed to the ground, screaming from the pain coursing through his systems. Moonracer skidded to a stop, turning around frantically at the sound of the wounded medic.

"MOONRACER!!" he cried out, trying to scramble to her side. The pain made him dizzy but he knew that she was gone. The blast went straight through her spark chamber and she was dead before she hit the ground. The last thought that he had before he slipped into unconsciousness was that his best friend was dead.

"It was any other day during the war. The Decepticons invaded a city on Cybertron and we were supposed to be field medics, helping out Optimus' crew bring in the wounded. It was like every other battle but deep down inside I knew something was going to go wrong." he started out.

Nexia knew she shouldn't be so interested in a story such as this but it captured her interest. Her heart reached out to him because she knew what it felt like to loose someone she cared about. She knew that he was devastated when his best friend died, just like when she woke on Earth and knew that she was the last Phoenix alive.

"Moonracer insisted that we venture deeper within the battle, knowing that most of the soldiers had very high recovery rates if we got to them before they came to the medical tent. I didn't want her to get injured so, naturally, I agreed to go with her and, against Optimus' orders we went into the middle of the battle. We were almost to the first of the injured soldiers before I heard a blast and felt a white hot pain shoot through my lower torso." he said, indicating toward the very, very, light yellow-sliver scar running across the lower portion of his abdomen, down one of his legs, and stopping at his knee.

Nexia gasped, a twinge of pain searing her own soul knowing that he went through such pain. He must have been through hell recovering from such trauma. He probably didn't have anyone to talk to about it since they were still in the middle of the war.

"I fell, unable to run to Moonracer's aid, and she was hit by an energy blast. She was hit strait through the spark chamber and I knew. I knew that she was dead as soon as she hit the ground. I don't remember much afterwards but when I awoke it was a full week later." he said, using Earth terminology of time as it had become a sort of habit.

Ratchet woke from stasis a week later in one of the many Autobot hospitals. His optics activated slowly as he remembered that his best friend was dead.

"So you're awake." Optimus' deep voice echoed throughout the room. Ratchet looked over to his Commanding Officer, optics dimming in depression. The great blue and red mech sighed, walking over to the bright yellow mech's side. Ratchet's paint was scratched and smeared with Energon, causing him to gag when he looked down at himself.

"I'm sorry." Optimus said, sadly shaking his head. He sat down in a chair next to the medic's resting berth, placing a hand on his friend's shoulder.

"No. I'm the one who should be sorry." Ratchet said, optics flickering. It should be him who was dead. He should have protected Moonracer better. If only he hadn't gotten hit… he could've pushed her out of the way.

"You did what you had to do. It wasn't your fault and Moonracer would have wanted you to know that." Optimus softly said.

"I know…can I see her body?" Ratchet brokenly asked, raising his head to meet Optimus' optics.

"I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this…but the Decepticons took her body." that single sentence echoed throughout Ratchet's mind for the rest of the day, staying in the crevices of his mind until exhaustion overtook him.

Nexia grimaced, picturing the extremely sad image in her mind. She stood, spreading her wings, and floating down in front of Ratchet's head. On a spur of the moment idea she bent down and kissed his cheek, feeling the heat already rush to her cheeks. They were probably turning an interesting shade of red right about now.

She squeaked as the medic looked at her, stunned, before she flew off at top speed. As he stared at her retreating back, with the vibrant view of her wings, a small smile formed on his faceplates. Maybe there was hope for him after all?

Nexia shook her head as she exited the medical bay as fast as she could. Why in the world did she do that? He just looked so sad that she wanted to express her feelings and tell him that everything was alright.

She could admit that she was fond of the medic and the way he scolded everyone made her laugh. She wanted to spend every waking moment with the mech and she could tell that he was fond of her as well. Did that mean he liked her? No, that would be impossible.

"I don't deserve him." she said, shaking her head as if ridding herself of a bad idea. She wanted to know what these feelings she had were. Every time she saw him her life brightened and she wanted to talk to him about anything and everything under the sun. Whenever he asked her a question she eagerly replied, wanting to supply him with as much information as she could think of.

Was she starting to love him?