A/N: So...I know I should be working on my Expect The Unexpected series, but I couldn't help coming back to this. I love Harry Potter discussions too much. Hope you like it :) Also, since I had to choose a last name for Blaine before 'Anderson' was announced as canon, his name remains the same as in previous chapters.

Rachel Berry cannot BELIEVE that Professor Flitwick rejected our appeal to change the Glee Club name! Does he not realize that having a dumb-sounding name increases our chances of being bullied in the hallways? Not to mention it sounds like an innuendo!

— (Finn Hudson, Artie Abrams, and 13 others like this)

— Noah Puckerman: I was on the verge of kicking him in the nads.

— Artie Abrams: I know. Flitwick has some serious communication issues. He never listens to us.

— Tina Cohen-Chang: Well, this time it might have something to do with the fact that Puck actually called him Professor Flitwick to his face.

— Noah Puckerman: It just slipped out.

Finn Hudson had a weird dream last night that the entire Glee club, plus Blaine Morgan, was at Hogwarts.

— (Blaine Morgan likes this)

— Noah Puckerman: Dude! What House was I in?

— Artie Abrams: Isn't it obvious? You'd be Slytherin.

— Rachel Berry: Don't be so quick to judge, Artie. The four Hogwarts Houses are defined as follows: Gryffindors help to save the world when there is a demand for strength and courage; Ravenclaws help to manage it when there is need of cleverness; Hufflepuffs help to keep the peace by being loyal and accepting; and Slytherins help to lead the world when there is call to be charismatic and cunning.

— Artie Abrams: …So Puck's from Durmstrang?

— (Finn Hudson, Mercedes Jones, and 12 others like this)

— Noah Puckerman: Dude, that's OFFENSIVE.

— Rachel Berry: Don't worry, Noah. According to the definitions listed above, you'd be sorted into Gryffindor.

— Kurt Hummel: WHAT.

— Rachel Berry: So would you, Kurt.

— Kurt Hummel: Ohhh, no. No way. I am not being sorted into the same House as Puckerman.

— Rachel Berry: So you'd rather be in Slytherin with me?

— Kurt Hummel: NO! No offense, Rachel. But I'd fit best in Ravenclaw.

— Rachel Berry: But while you are, in fact, very smart, intelligence is not your strongest trait, Kurt. It's either charisma or courage. Pick one.

— Blaine Morgan: Oh my God, Kurt, you have your very own Harry Potter situation! You HAVE to ask the Sorting Hat to put you in Gryffindor. You are Ginny, after all. And you need to be in the same house as me.

— Rachel Berry: Blaine, you'd be sorted into Hufflepuff with Brittany.

— Brittany Pierce: Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders.

— Mike Chang: What? Britt, where did you hear that?

— Brittany Pierce: I dunno, Artie just told me to say it.

— Blaine Morgan: I can't be Hufflepuff! I'm Harry Potter!

— Rachel Berry: Despite the fact that you're the Boy Who Lived, the Sorting Hat would place us in our Houses depending on our own personality, not the House belonging to the character to whom we most relate.

— Blaine Morgan: This is so unfair.

— Rachel Berry: It was also unfair for Harry to be born the Chosen One and live with the Dursleys during his childhood. Compared to him, I'd say that you being sorted into Hufflepuff is a very minor problem.

— Rachel Berry: In short, deal with it.

— Blaine Morgan: Hmph.

Kurt Hummel: *sigh* I can't believe I'm saying this, but I guess I'd ask the Sorting Hat to put me into Gryffindor. At least Rachel's singing won't be constantly echoing off the stone walls in the common room.

— Finn Hudson: That and you probably wouldn't be caught dead living in a dungeon.

— Kurt Hummel: Also true. Moldy underground spaces are so not my style.

— Noah Puckerman: Wait, I thought you lived in a basement?

Lauren Zizes fails to understand why her fellow Glee clubbers didn't give her an HP character. You bitches gonna pay.

— Santana Lopez: I know who you are… :)

— Lauren Zizes: If you say that I am the Fat Lady, Neville Longbottom, Moaning Myrtle, Arabella Figg, or Mrs. Norris, you will spend tomorrow in the nurses office with a dislocated shoulder.

— Noah Puckerman: Back off, Santana.

— Santana Lopez: I'm keeping it real.

— Tina Cohen-Chang: There's only a limited number of times you can use that excuse, Santana. Besides, I think it's kind of obvious who Lauren is.

— Santana Lopez: The Fat Lady? :)

— Lauren Zizes: Bad move, Lopez. Bad move.

— Tina Cohen-Chang: Uh, no. I was going to say that she's Rita Skeeter. Which, admittedly, is a little weird considering the fact that she's dating Puck (aka Fred/George), but I still think it fits.

— Kurt Hummel: The mental picture of Rita Skeeter dating either of the Weasley twins just ripped my brain open.

— Finn Hudson: Oh God. Mine too.

— Lauren Zizes: Whatever. Rita Skeeter's awesome. I'm gonna turn into a beetle to help my spying business. And considering the dirt I dug up on Quinn, I'd say that Santana has a fair amount of reason to be worried.

— Santana Lopez: Bring it.

Blaine Morgan – Kurt Hummel: Hey, Brittany texted me that you were at the hospital. What happened? Is it your dad again?

— Kurt Hummel: No, no, nothing like that. Santana's arm got broken during her fight with Lauren.

— Blaine Morgan: Whoa! Is she okay?

— Kurt Hummel: Yeah, of course. Lauren keeps saying that she did the Wizarding World a favor by ripping off Santana's Dark Mark.

— Blaine Morgan: I like her. She's a Gryffindor to the bone.

— Lauren Zizes: Damn straight.

Rachel Berry is planning out a new number for the Marauders tomorrow!

— Mercedes Jones: What song is it?

— Rachel Berry: "Double, Double, Toil and Trouble". I only wish we had trained giant toads like they did in Prisoner of Azkaban.

— Kurt Hummel: Okay, I say that we arrange and rehearse this on our own time so that we can suddenly perform it during Glee without letting Flitwick know what we're about to do. You know, just to freak him out.

— Noah Puckerman: I am so down with that.

— Blaine Morgan: Someone please tape this so I can see it.

— Lauren Zizes: I'll work on setting up candid cameras in the choir room tomorrow during lunch. If Flitwick happens to find them, he'll just think it was Coach Umbridge and won't suspect us.

Brittany Pierce is on the hunt for giant toads!

— Kurt Hummel: …Do I even want to know?

— Brittany Pierce: It's for our Harry Potter number, silly.

— Kurt Hummel: Someone needs to stop this before it hurts you, boo. Where are you right now?

— Brittany Pierce: I'm not really sure. I'm in the woods sitting on a rock under a tree.

— Kurt Hummel: Santana?

— Santana Lopez: On it. Leaving right now.

Santana Lopez: Brittany's fine, everyone.

— Artie Abrams: Thank the Wizard God. Where was she?

— Brittany Pierce: I was in my backyard. We have a lot of trees.

— Blaine Morgan: I love this girl.

Brittany Pierce couldn't find any giant toads. I just found one frog that could fit in my palm, but it hopped away.

— Kurt Hummel: Aw, that's okay, boo. You'll find some others. After all, Hufflepuffs are particularly good finders :)

— Noah Puckerman: Okay, even I have to admit that that was a bad joke.

— Kurt Hummel: It was right there. I couldn't resist.

A/N: It's a bit short, but that felt like a good place to end it. Not sure when the next chapter will be up, but you can be sure that another one (or two... or three...) are coming. Leave a review!