On- Route to Lawrence, Kansas

It seemed the bus ride was endless, no matter how many times Castiel looked at his watch the hands barely changed. Seconds felt like minutes, and minutes felt like hours. He has sat silently watching the cars and passing scenery in an attempt to distract him from what his mind was still trying to process. All the emotions buzzing through his mind made his stomach clench and body squirm. Fear, panic, anxiety, worry and pain he could list them all but it did not help him feeling any better. At times he would lean his head against the cold window, closing his eyes only briefly in attempt to rid the itching tiredness but at a single movement from another passenger, his body and mind automatically sprang to attention, a single great rush of adrenaline made his heart pound and blood rush to his ears. It was like his body was getting ready to run just in case his Father had tracked him down, the paranoia never once budged. When the bus had pulled aside for a quick break, he would keep his head down in the hopes no one recognise him, stay in the crowd enough for cover but no physical contact.

He had tried his best to think positively to what he could achieve and do in Lawrence. Freedom, the sweet taste of freedom he had craved for so long and normality. What he would have done just to feel what normal felt like, but having his Father's promise that one day he would track him down weighed on his mind.

Would it even be possible to start over and to live a normal life with Gabriel?

He half smiled sardonically at the thought that was one of the questions that seemed to always come back. He could barely remember what it felt like to be normal, after his Mother had passed things seemed to change with attitudes and beliefs. And a normal life had just evaporated much like his Father's sanity. He had yearned to be like his Neighbours children going to the park with their siblings, sleeping through the night without a worry about what could happen. Feelings the love and affection from his Family but it was all alien to him. Of course Gabriel had tried his best to make Castiel feel some love and affection but Saint Michael who was constantly reporting to their Father seemed to take great pleasure in dashing that. Their Father soon took to drink and it was like the slightest sign of happiness or love, it was automatically counted as a sin of possession.

One night their Father had returned to find Gabriel comforting Castiel, the anger in their Father's eyes could not even be described. It was almost like he disgusted at the thought of comfort. Words were yelled, some of which indicated that Castiel was an abomination and it was his fault their Mother had died. Castiel's existence had caused the cancer due mainly to Castiel being the youngest and so different. Gabriel had protecting Castiel, telling the old man to settle down and sleep it off.

His Father had never once lifted a hand at Michael, Raphael or Gabriel but once Gabriel had left the Family Home the repressed anger his Father held came out like the fires of Hell. Michael was brain washed and Raphael had never cared much for Castiel, doors closed and memories were forgotten and if someone was to ask why Castiel had bruises on his body. Both would say almost casually that Castiel had a tendency to be prone to accidents at home. Once Raphael had joked that Castiel had the balance of a person with two left feet and had fallen down the stairs or the eyesight of a near-blind person and had walked into a door or table.

"We will be arriving in Lawrence, Kansas within the hour…"

Lawrence, Kansas

Once the bus had arrived Castiel pulled out envelope that held a single piece of information. Gabriel had gotten in contact with a close-friend and had asked that the envelope be passed on to Castiel as soon as possible. It held the address of Gabriel's current location.

66 Swan Song Lane
Lawrence
Kansas

Years of bible reading and lectures had made Castiel a little worried at the numbers '66' which to him were a bad omen it had basically been drilled into him at a young age of the significant importance of the numbers. Whether Gabriel was aware of this he would have to ask him when he finally found him.

He walked around Lawrence with morbid interest and curiosity it was so peaceful and calm, like nothing could disturb the peace. He heard the loud dongs of the local Church announcing the time, he stood still as 12 loud dongs were sounded and his stomach soon connected. Due to the amount of anxiety with traveling and getting caught, Castiel could not recall the last time he ate. He walked towards a small Bakery. A pretty blonde girl greeted him at the counter, she seemed first unaware of his current appearance but than seemed transfixed. "Hello there, my gosh are you okay?" he knew instantly she was talking about his bruised face. "Yes, I am fine. Umm, I was wondering if you could help me?" she continued to stare in shock until she shook herself. "Yes of course, I'm sorry. How can I help?" his thoughts of food soon disappeared as well as the hunger when he withdrew the envelope. "Could you direct me to Swan Song Lane?" her lips almost twitched in humour like there was some inside joke. "Are you looking for the Winchesters or something?" he stared at her blankly. "I am sorry, who?" her face turned red, Castiel continued to stare at her in confusion. "I apologise if I was not clear, but I am hoping to find Gabriel Novak there." She laughed awkwardly. "No I'm sorry I shouldn't have presumed. I just thought you were another of the Winchester bunch I've lost count how many people have come in here looking for the Winchester. Pretty popular lot really." She spoke quickly as if trying to brush aside the awkwardness. "But I do know Gabriel, he's one of our best customers."

The girl eventually introduced herself as Jo Harvelle and wrote down very detailed directions to the Swan Song Lane. He followed them precisely and eventually found himself walking down the lane counting the houses till he finally stopped in front of the house which he hoped still housed Gabriel.

Cautiously he walked up the path and rang the doorbell. The sound echoed but no one opened the door, nothing moved within the house and Castiel stood there considering his next move. He turned to leave just as the front door opened. "Castiel?"

His body filled with relief as a voice he hadn't heard in a long time reached his ears; he turned to see Gabriel standing at the door.

A/N: Nice long chapter
Review and more to come soon