Thanks to the following for their lovely reviews, it means alot! Wolverette, dancinqt21, Bluedaze, Dragonflamecrystal, chellerbelle, Mcloving's Grey, Soon2Bme, Fluffy, 3togetready, Cherish and Lilly :)

Can anyone remember the song that this chapter is named after? I used to be a huge fan of this band when I was a little kid. I worshipped the ground that they walked on... Kinda like I am with Hugh Jackman now, LOL!

The Lady Is A Vamp

Cause the lady is a vamp, she's a vixen not a tramp
She's a da da da da da da
Come on fellas, place your bets, 'cause you ain't seen nothing yet
She's the talk of the town, she's the best, yes

Jean had been trying to lend a helping hand, Rogue's thoughts had to have been heard by every mutant with a telepathic ability, within a thirty mile radius. No wonder the Professor took an aspirin the size of a cheeseburger almost every night.

The southern belle was screaming her heartfelt feelings she felt for Logan and he was oblivious. A typical hard headed male, just like Scott. They both would have baulked at the comparison, but they had more in common then they knew.

Scott had told her... No, ordered her not to get involved, but he wasn't here, was he.

Cyclops hadn't returned and she wasn't worried in the slightest. This was a repeat of the events in the summer of Nineteen ninety seven when they had argued over the Spice Girls.

Yes, you read that right, the Spice Girls. It had been a rather pathetic disagreement, even by their standards. They had been discussing Girl Power and Scott had casually mentioned in the course of the conversation that he was taken with Ginger Spice. Jean had always thought that she was the only red headed beauty in Scott's life and the green eyed monster had reared its ugly head.

Red heads supposedly were fiery by nature, Jean Grey was not a stereotype. She was caring, nurturing and an all round girl next door.

Matchmaking was also a hidden talent of hers and Wolverine and Rogue were the newest in a long line of victims... Much to Scott's dismay. But, if her fiancé was going to run away and hide every time they exchanged heated words, then he had no right to even comment on her actions.

It was a disaster, from the comfort of her own bed she had given Rogue's mind a mental nudge. Okay, it was a little more then that. What Jean had actually done would possibly anger the Professor and her errant beau. She had thought that if Logan had caught a glimpse of Rogue in a compromising position then he would see her for what Marie really was, a beautifully young woman that was no longer a child.

It wasn't a nudge, she had released a full scale war on Rogue's mind and she had her best interests at heart, of course. Jean had prodded and cajoled the girl into removing her underwear and tripping over in front of the Wolverines door and now he was at a loss for words.

This really wasn't what she had had in mind, her matchmaking empire was crashing before her very eyes.

Logan wasn't a man of many words and he was not about to change now. Staring straight ahead at the heavenly sight, he licked his lips and blinked. "What the hell?"

Yeah, that sounded okay. He hadn't allowed the heat to creep into his voice, because he was talking to Rogue, she was only a kid. Even if she was currently making an exhibition of herself in the fucking hallway of all places.

Rogue could only blink and blush. Oh yes, two very unique responses that she had down to a tee. Gazing around her surroundings her thoughts were boomeranging across her mind and the evidence was amounting to only one possibility... She was having a nervous break down.

Its amazing when one word registers in your mind and Marie could only think of one.

Vagina

Vagina

Vagina

She was proudly displaying her sex to the man of her dreams, holy shit. The next eight weeks were going to be spent lying on a couch, glaring at the ceiling and describing the most embarrassing moment of her life.

Logan had uttered three words and she was at a loss as to what to say. "This is a dream." Rogue belted out, with the expertise of a nursery school teacher singing a lullaby. "Its only a dream."

Covering her modesty, the Southern spitfire prayed that it would work. She didn't ask for much but this was taking everything a step too far. Wanting Logan was one thing, flashing her most sacred of places hadn't been on the cards. What had gotten into her? She couldn't even blame the liquor, she had never touched a drop of alcohol in her whole life. Well apart from last night but that was only one shot.

A dream? Logan was sure that he wasn't dreaming and these were not the kinds of dreams he had anyway. What did she take him for, a fucking idiot? He hadn't come down in the last shower and his brain was working overtime trying to fit all of the pieces of the puzzle together.

He didn't smell the tell tale scent of booze on her, and he was ninety nine point nine percent that he was still awake. Unless that's what he was supposed to think.

Stepping back into his room, Logan slammed the door shut and counted to ten. Resting his forehead against the wooden door, he took a deep breath. Calming himself and trying to bury the photographic memory of Marie and her...Well, her... Jesus Christ, he couldn't bring himself to say it.

Opening the door, he took a peek out and growled angrily at himself. He was acting like a pansy ass, he wasn't scared of the girl and he sure as hell wasn't scared of seeing her like that again.

Crap, this was no dream, the scent of watermelon and strawberry shampoo was still tickling his nostrils. The kid was nowhere to be seen, she could be quick on her feet when she wanted to be. It made him wonder why she would complain when he made her do laps in his class, Rogue had been holding out on him.

Marie was pacing her room fully clothed and infuriated with herself. Was she having a mental breakdown? No, she was of sound mind and body. Oh yes, the way Logan had been drooling over her sound body was boosting her confidence levels to new found heights.

But, that was beside the point, she didn't recall taking her pants off or even walking to Logan's door. Is this what they call an out of body experience? No, of course not... She would have remembered that. Yet, this wasn't freaking her out, it actually gave her hope.

Hope that he would see her as his equal and not as a child he had sworn to protect.

A girl could dream, couldn't she? Fantasizing about your teenage crush hadn't been outlawed just yet and Marie was going to make the most of her imagination.

"Chica, are you up?" Jubilee's high pitched voice snapped Rogue out of her thoughts and she rushed to open her bedroom door.

Why couldn't her best friend have arrived ten minutes ago and stopped her from making one of the worst mistakes of her life? Jubilation Lee always did have the worst timing.

She almost separated the door from its hinges, and Jubilee's hand from the rest of her body in her unbridled eagerness to gain another perspective.

"Where have you been?" Marie demanded, shutting the door and crowding her Asian friend.

"Do you think its easy to look this good?"

"No one cares, Jubes. Now I need your advice..."

"What do you mean, no one cares?" The firecracker scoffed, taking the comments to heart. "I'll have you know that I'm going to make the cover of Vogue one day. The first mutant to pose in leather. Yellow leather, of course."

"Yeah, of course and that's great," Marie replied sarcastically. "But I need to ask you a hypothetical question. There's this girl and she likes this guy. The guy though, he doesn't notice the girl. The girl wants him to notice her and now she's done something that's so over the top, she doesn't think that the guy will ever talk to her again without feeling uncomfortable."

Jubilee rolled her eyes and placed her hand on Rogue's shoulder. "Go get your Wolvie, girl."

Logan was lying in bed, again. His brain wasn't going to let him sleep, it had been stimulated... Sexually stimulated by his next door neighbour and boy, was he in deep shit. A view of Rogue's... Rogue's... Crap, he still couldn't say it and he couldn't force the colour pictures in high definition from his brain either.

He wasn't in hell, this wasn't heaven, he was floating in limbo. The Wolverine was unsure and that didn't sit right with him, he was in unfamiliar territory and he was tempted to run.

Fleeing to Canada with his tail placed firmly between his legs didn't appeal to the fighter in him, he was made of tougher stuff then that. Fuck it, Logan wasn't going anywhere, he was going to stay right here and deal with this shit.

Marie wasn't going to take no for an answer, and didn't even knock before barging into Logan room. Without a word to the feral mutant, she found his duffel bag and began to collect his clothes.

"At least you're wearin' pants this time." Logan snorted, sitting up and reaching for a cigar.

Rogue snatched the cigar from his hand and tucked it behind her ear. "Get out of bed, get dressed, get your ass to the garage and I might show you it again."

She knew that she couldn't deny that Vaginagate had ever happened or that it was all in his mind. However much it embarrassed her to admit to ripping her pants off in the hallway, she knew that his memories meant a great deal to him.

He was at a loss for words and it was disturbing. Where was his Rogue? This confident, sassy girl couldn't be the kid that had wolfed down the beef jerky. The same girl that had cried on the train, the one he had comforted. He was right back in limbo again and if he wasn't careful he was going to have company.

"Logan, Hurry up!"

"What the hell for?" That was his only defence, growling and snarling in the hope that she would high-tail it out of here and leave him alone.

Marie knew his game, he was playing the snarly growl card and she had the knowledge to beat him at his own game. "You're our chaperone, remember?"

"Hey, I didn't agree to anythin' and I ain't chaperone material."

"You are chaperone material, you just don't know it yet."

"Let's stick to what I do know, huh?" Logan replied, cocking an eyebrow and catching hold of her arm. "I'm smoking this cigar." He announced gruffly, plucking his cigar from her ear. "Then I'm gonna go to sleep. My ass is stayin' put."

She smirked at him and imitated his signature arched eyebrow. "If you only wanted to sleep, you only had to ask."

Lighting his beloved cigar, he glared at her. "What are you...?"

Rogue ripped her satin glove off of her hand and caressed his face, watching him inhale sharply and his eyes roll back in his head. This was possibly the worst idea she had ever had the courage to put into practice and it could result in a death too... Mainly her death when her victim eventually woke up from his coma.

Removing her hand and ignoring the giddiness she felt at touching his skin, she watched him fall back and luckily for her he was out like a light. Heck, she felt ever so slightly remorseful at rendering him unconscious but he could be so difficult to deal with at times.

Now, how was she going to move his body from here to the car?

"Jubilee, lift with your knees."

"Oh my god, when Wolvie wakes up I'm going to tell him to lay off the beer. He must weigh more then an elephant!"

"Its not the beer." Rogue giggled, fighting to keep her composure, they were still on dangerous grounds. They were both dragging Logan through the hallway and were almost at the stairs. So close to safety and yet so far. "Its the adamantium."

"No wonder he's so buff." Jubilee replied. "Imagine carrying all that weight around with you."

"Yeah and I'm sure the working out doesn't help him at all."

"We're at the stairs. Now what are we going to do?"

Marie glanced over Jubilee's shoulder and nodded at their destination. "Just drag him down, do I have to think of everything? Jesus Christ, I'm gonna be stuck with the damn spark plug for the next three days."

"Roguey, quit doing that, its creepy." She hissed, balancing on the top step and carefully stepping down. "One Logan is enough."

"I can't help it..."

"Rogue?"

Rogue released her hold on the comatose Logan's arms and raced around the corner, only to come face to face with Storm.

"Storm, um, hi."

"I thought you would have left already." The weather witch replied serenely. "Have you seen Scott? I need a word with him."

Scott was currently on the high seas, far away from Westchester and the mansion. He certainly wasn't going to be in the mood for a quick chat anytime soon. "Uh, no." She uttered hastily, gulping nervously and praying that Jubilee could stay quiet for a couple of minutes.

"Oh, I thought he was your chaperone for the trip?"

"No, we found somebody else."

Ororo opened her plump lips and Rogue was sure the game was up. Then something amazing happened, forget about Jubilee having awful timing, the girl was a God send.

A loud thud and a number of nondescript crashes came from the direction of the stairs. "What on earth?" Storm muttered, fighting to get passed Rogue.

Marie stood her ground and attempted to calm the panicking beauty. "Calm your ass down 'Ro." Shit, that wasn't what she had in mind. This trip was a disaster even before it had started. Damn Logan and his familiar dialect.

"Rogue, someone might be hurt."

Thankfully Ororo had failed to pick up on the loss of Rogue's southern accent.

"No, I'm fine! Wolvie broke my fall!" Jubilee called from the bottom of the stairs, making Marie cringe.

"Wolverine?" Storm gasped, gently pushing passed Rogue.

"Look, there's Scott!"

"Where?"

"He went that way." Marie responded lying through her teeth and pointing down a random corridor. "He looked like he was in a hurry, too"

"Have a good time, okay?" Storm smiled and rushed off following the invisible Scott's trail.

Rogue waited until she was no longer in sight and ran down the stairs two at a time. "Are you crazy? You could have hurt Logan!"

"Hurt him?" Jubilee shrieked, rolling off his chest. "I've broken a nail! You see what I do for you, Chica?"

"We're almost there, Jubes. Please just concentrate on getting him to the garage and I'll pay for a manicure." Marie pleaded, gazing at Wolverine's face. He looked so sweet when he was asleep... Um, unconscious. There was no sign of fury or distress. Maybe she had done the right thing?

"Fine."

"Help me again, will you? I can't drag him to the garage on my own."

This was going to be worth the hassle, that's what she had to keep telling herself as she caught the scent of her friends hesitation. Logan would probably thank her for acting like a true pal. Everybody wanted to have their life sucked out of their sculptured, handsomely gorgeous body, dropped head first down the stairs and then packed away in the car like a piece of luggage... Didn't they?