Chris tried to not let the previous night and the morning's earlier events get to him.
Something straightforward and undemanding would probably be enough to distract the new thoughts and unusual feelings. Marking seemed to be compatible enough for such problems.
Of course, it wasn't a long-term solution and he knew that after work, he had to go back to his flat and fire all manner of questions at the young girl who happened to be staying there – and not forgetting that he had to be subjected to the ones that she was so desperate to ask him.
And she had every right to interrogate him – if in fact he did happen to be whom she came to see.
He found himself running on autopilot again, and he couldn't help but start to find it frustrating.
It certainly didn't help when he vaguely heard his room's door open and not hear the footsteps approach him, as he remained perched over his desk.
He almost jumped a foot out of his chair as he inadvertently glanced up and found that Karen was standing not too far from him.
"Y-you scared me."
She smiled a little in amusement at his little jump.
"On edge for once, I see." She teased, watching him stop what he was writing and put his pen down. "I thought you're meant to be the one telling me to chill out, not the other way round."
"Sorry," he quickly apologised, "just haven't slept all that well."
She seemed more concerned. She knew Chris always came in, in a sunny disposition. Unless…it was because it was a Tuesday. But that was silly; he came in quite cheerfully whatever day of the week it was.
"You seem as though you've slept ok."
He knew she was going to catch him out if he wasn't quick enough. "Oh, I got to sleep ok, but I kept waking up at really stupid times."
"It didn't exactly help as it was so cold." She admitted. "You should throw some thick blankets on top of your bed so you stay warm. That's what I tend to do when the temperature drops like that."
"I can't relax when I have lots of blankets on top of me like that." He dimly protested, feeling her hand on his shoulder. He froze at the action, and he didn't know why he didn't like it.
They were close enough to embrace such contact, but if things were on his mind, then it was probably better if he completely froze anything and everything out – to focus on something else. Something he considered therapeutic.
Karen frowned at his agitation, and squeezed him there to try and relax him.
"I'd get yourself home after work and get some sleep." She suggested.
Chris knew that wouldn't help anything. He knew that too much sleep wasn't good and he also knew that there was absolutely no way he was going to be able to even rest when he got home.
He was going to be interrogated by someone claiming to be his daughter and he was going to have to find the energy to do the same with her. He shrugged her hand off him, in order to reject it.
"Chris, I…" She was shocked at his response. "I didn't mean to annoy you."
"I'll be fine," he felt a headache start, "I think I need to be by myself."
"I want to help you." She stated, her voice coming over soft yet faint. "If you want to go on lighter duties…"
"I said 'I'll be fine'." His answer came out quite harsh, and it was a tone he wasn't used to expressing. "I said I'd be fine, so just drop it. I don't want people making a fuss over me."
She pulled away from him, watching him sharply pick up his pen and automatically go back to where he'd missed off. "I was only trying to help you. Next time I don't think I'll bother."
And with that, she briskly left the room, closing the door behind her.
Chris stopped what he was writing, pressing the nib against the box he was going to tick. He felt unbelievably guilty, and he had every right to feel that way.
He almost felt like chasing after Karen down the corridor, stopping her and apologising to her profusely for talking to her in such a way. But they were friends, and how would anyone else perceive his behaviour?
For all they knew, students and other staff alike could see it as courting behaviour, and that was something he was trying to steer well clear of.
He did not fancy her – and he would not give anyone else the satisfaction of holding such thoughts.
Two-thirds through Chris's first set, Tom knocked on the door and signalled for him to come out.
Frowning, he did as he was asked and carefully shut the door behind him as the two males stood out in the corridor together.
He'd hoped Karen hadn't told Tom everything and had sent for him to take him to her.
"Karen asked me to ask you to cover for her." He explained. "She just left to go up to the hospital to see Jess."
So she decided to use him as a mediator for them both. Things really were that bad between them.
"She only had to come and see me," he replied loosely, "I've been here all morning, Tom."
He shook his head. "She knew you had a few more sets than yesterday, so she decided to send me down to see you instead of asking you to come up to see her. After this set's over, she said for you to cancel your other ones."
"Well, that was very thoughtful of her, I guess…" He felt glad that his answer didn't come out particularly sarcastic.
Tom frowned at his unreceptive answer. "Everything ok, mate?"
He snapped to. "I'm fine." He made to go back in. "I'm fine…just got things on my mind, that's all."
"Don't let it get to you," he smiled softly, "we need you with us."
Chris went back into his set, hearing a small disturbance at the back of the room. He peered up from what he was doing.
On top of not really knowing what to do when he got home, he did not want to have to deal with fighting kids.
Choosing to remain as composed as he could, he emerged from behind his desk and went over to the commotion. He stood there quite patiently, his arms crossed over his broad chest. "Something you wanna tell me, boys?"
"It's Harry," one of them pointed out, "he's being stupid."
He didn't realise it came to the end of the set.
By the time Tom had finished talking to him, that was pretty much a sixth of the remainder of it.
The kids made a move to leave, and as Harry went to do so, Chris quickly placed a hand on his shoulder to make him stay.
"Not you," he noted firmly, "not till you explain to me why you were disrupting the set."
"I wasn't disrupting anything."
"Harry, I…" He perched himself on a chair next to him. "Are you sure you should be back in? You still don't look too good and you know that if you feel poorly, you should be at home and in bed."
He grew worried at what could be making him so ill. If the doctor had given him medication for an infection he didn't have, then what was going on with him?
"Have you been having trouble eating at all?"
"What's that got to do with you?"
Now he knew he felt particularly bad as he had problems of his own to contend with when he got home, but what was happening in front of him was something he could not ignore.
He did, however, ignore Harry's belligerent response. He was being defensive, and that was something he couldn't blame him for. "You don't have to push me away, I'm here to help you. And if you're worried at me telling your mum, don't worry 'cause I won't say anything. Just tell me, Harry."
The younger male looked away, feeling tears build up behind his eyes. What he was feeling and how he was coping was something he didn't want to own up to. But Chris offered him complete privacy, and he wasn't someone who was going to break a promise like that. He closed his eyes and nodded slowly.
"What sort of problems have you had?" He wanted to know, concern clearly there in his voice. "Eating in general or…something more specific?"
"You'll take me to a shrink." He stated dimly.
"No, I won't. I can suggest you something that'd help but I can't do anything till you tell me." His grip on him became more supportive than restrictive and he wished he would give him some form of eye contact – something that told him that he trusted him enough. "I've given you my word I won't tell your mum, so the least you can do for me is to be honest with me."
Harry drew in a small sigh. "I haven't eaten for a few days. I feel so bad about it and I don't know why."
"You're just working out your feelings right now, that's all." He explained, realising he was starting to sound like a shrink. "It's almost a coping mechanism, if you like. You feel bad about it 'cause you're stopping something that you know you shouldn't."
"It's not like I don't wanna eat, but…"
"…You just do it anyway." Chris came over more thoughtful. "'Cause you don't have anyone else to talk to about this, and that only you and I know about it, I think you should start writing your feelings down from now on. Whenever you feel bad or upset or annoyed, just write it down. You'll find that doing something like that makes it better."
He nodded in acknowledgement.
"If it doesn't work or you wanna talk to me some more about it, then just come back and see me. It'll take some time, but it'll go away. It might even go away when the baby comes."
Once Harry had gone, the older male transferred to Karen's room so he could cover for her.
A few minutes since he got there, his mobile went off and he quickly answered it. He was surprised to find who had called him.
What they happened to call him for was something that would forever resound in his thoughts.