Alec grips my hand strongly. That the Scot's name, Alec. It's a nice name. I try to snatch my arm away but I'm too weak. Used up the remaining strength I had to mourn over Marlene.
Really, what was I thinking? While I was building up my system I was also building up my ego and taking down my patience. Marlene stayed true the whole time while I became the biggest jerk in the world. I smiled while I hurt people and laughed when they cried. Marlene knew I was horrible yet she was still my friend. I should've supported her and the pissed off Italian, Romano. Whenever I looked at him he looked at me as if I were dead to him. Maybe if I had been a bit more observant I would have seen that he felt the same way about her. I had heard she was getting out in a few months, and had planned to elope with him. Now all of that was gone. I destroyed a happy ending just because I lost my temper.
Kirkland acted different towards me, as expected. Told me that I could either choose solitary confinement for two months and get an extended sentence or be hung. I was about to choose the death penalty when Alec shot me a warning glance. He didn't want me gone, not yet. I automatically chose confinement and Kirkland nodded at me with narrowed eyes. It would've looked better on his rep is I had chosen death penalty, because then he would seem colder and cooler to his superiors, but he didn't say anything all the same. We both already knew that that one-night stand we had never really happened. It was all a dream, an illusion.
The Scot's hand was finally released from mine as I was lead back into the room filled with darkness. The Chinese guard stood with us and waited for Alec to close the door. He ignored him and gave me a hug instead.
"Don't worry about things, Amelia. It'll be alright, I promise."
I looked out the window in front of me, seeing the seagulls fly high and free. The religious debate scandal wouldn't work now. All I could really do was wait. Wait for something, anything.
The door is shut and I'm greeted by the darkness. It swamps around me and tells me of all the wrongs that I've done. I try to imagine the starry night but the stars turn into evil red eyes that glare with malice. I close my eyes instead and sleep on the floor. No tears escape my eye ducts; they were dry from sobbing for a whole hour. I pressed my head to the cold ground and shivered. Things were different now, and I had to adapt. Until then I had to figure out my own self, to what I had become. Try and change it. I had enough time after all.
"I'm getting out of here, Alec."
I say this with certainty, and the Scot looks at me with wide eyes. Not doe ones, but ones of pure shock.
"What?"
"The more I stay here, the more evil I become. That simple. You can join me if you want, but I just wanted you to know."
He frowns at me. At the moment we're sitting together with my wrists handcuffed. True to policy I had to wear them when outside my new cell, even if it was only a few feet away. We sat on a pale, faded out bench with large and dirty window behind us. One and a half months had passed. If it hadn't been for Alec I would've gone crazy. And yes, I was in love with him. Not a big deal when you thought about it.
"And what if I try to stop you, lass?"
He smiles, the metal ring in his ear shining from the dimming sunlight. I can feel a light blush on my cheeks. I didn't notice how handsome he was until we had become lovers. I shake off the flighty feelings and answer him seriously.
"Then I kill you or knock you out."
"That's a bit extreme for a wee girl like yourself."
"Stop using the Scottish cliches, I know you don't talk like that."
"Suit yourself. When do you plan to break out?"
I stop from responding and narrow my eyes. Trust is something I don't give away easily. Kirkland had exploited me and used me as an example. I couldn't forgive him for that. It turned out the two closest to me were right all along. He was a jerk.
"I won't tell a soul, I promise."
"I'm sure you won't but someone might try to stop me. That someone being you, of course."
"Just say it already."
"Tomorrow night, when the lights are being replaced and all the strict guards leave early to drink."
"I see…"
The melancholy in his face is obvious. Whenever he started liking me I never knew, but it was obvious he liked me a lot now. Enough to settle things with Romano. Now the Italian didn't spit at me as much. I smile at him, feeling the pang in my heart. He doesn't smile back but kisses me on the cheek.
"Well, I guess you have to do what you have to do. I wish nothing but the best for you too."
Being soft wasn't my thing. It was when I was a girl, crying my heart out over spilled milk, but not when I was older. Feelings made you do stupid things though. I let a tear slide out and I laid my head on his shoulder. He didn't push it away, just laid his on top of mine. I breathed in the scent of whiskey and smokes.
"You got any cigarettes for me?"
"You're still using the system, aren't you?"
He hands me one anyway and lights it for me. I mutter a thanks and tell him that I'm not. The system collapsed when I strangled Marlene. There, I said it. I killed her. Now I had to leave that behind me.
The glow of the sunset is disturbed by sudden rain. Alec tells me he has to leave for the night. I walk with him to my cell and wait by the door. Rather then kissing me, he embraces me. I feel his warmth transfer to mine and I sigh contently. He lets go but keeps his hands on my shoulders.
"Good luck, lass. You'll need it."
I smile with genuine emotions. Happiness, depression, and love.
"Thanks. Good night."
The door closes loudly as it locks and I stare at where it's supposed to be. Tomorrow night would be hell but it would be worth it. It was always worth it in the end.
Sneaking out was easy when it was done right. I had already bribed someone to get me out of the cell and not talk. Their accent was clear as they led me out.
"I wish you'd stop-a this thing here before you-a make yourself get in trouble!"
Romano scolded me with irritation. I simply ignored him and handed him the hair pins Marlene had worn on hot days. They were a light pink and looked beautiful on her. She had gotten them through the system and given them to me so no one would find out about them. I had forgotten about it, however, and kept it with me in my pocket. Romano held them in his hands, a distant look in his face. I gave him another moment then cleared my throat.
"Alright-a already, I'll leave!"
He sounded angry but gave me a thankful smile before leaving. Nervousness and tension stopped me from smiling back. Now came the hard part. The window in front of me shivered and I gripped the metal bars. The guards were always talking about how weak and withered they were. The jail had been made in the early nineteenth century and had been remodeled in the fifties. This part of it, the secluded convict area, had been dismissed. After applying some elbow grease I managed to pry the bars off. I looked down and the height from where I was to the ground heightened. I shook away the paranoia, prepared myself, and then jumped. I rolled once I hit the ground and took a second to steady myself. Search lights shone near me and I skirted around them. The exit was already in my sights. I dodged the lights and crept past the security guard who was sleeping soundly in their security box. The night guard was none other then the Greek.
When I made it past the signs and out of the walls, I took a moment to breathe. Breathe in the real world, the world I would soon be living in. Get over my past and start a new future. The possibilities were endless. I felt a lump from not being able to see Alec again or find out what had happened with Fiona and Amy's armies but suppressed it. This wasn't the time to regret. Now was the time for action.
I jogged through the woods. Trees loomed over me ominously. The forest itself was quiet. Too quiet. Something was wrong.
And then I felt someone pin me against a tree. I looked up to see the Warden. He glared at me with hatred. I looked at him with scared eyes.
"W-what are you doing here?"
Suddenly his serious look broke and he laughed.
"What's this? The big and bad Amelia is now stuttering? How comical!"
"I asked what you're doing here!"
"I'm here to stop you, of course."
He sneered at my stunned expression. I felt my blood run cold when I saw he wasn't without weapons. A gun lay in his holster and a dagger was strapped to it.
"I heard from a friend who heard it from a friend who heard it from a friend."
Kirkland twirled his fingers around. He was playing with me. I was now the mouse, him the cat. I was ripe to be stripped of every ounce of honor I had. He knew this. The question was what he wanted.
"What do I want, you think?"
I jump at his remark and he laughs deviously, eyes glinting. He leans forward, breathing near my ear. Past memories make me shiver.
"I want you, inmate."
I try to push him back but his real strength shows. He brings his body closer to mine. I feel his hand rest on my flaming cheek. The other brushes a stray hair behind my ear.
"I want you to become mine, to stay with me. I've had it with overly lovesick girls. I want someone like you, who doesn't care if I cheat on them. Stay here with me."
He starts to kiss me but I wrench my head away. He slams his head, forcing me to look at him. The good-nature in his eyes has turned into lust.
"Don't deny me. You don't have a choice."
I feel like hyperventilating. I feel like punching him in the face. I feel like telling him I'd rather sleep with a pig than with him. I feel like grabbing his gun and shooting him between the eyes, a kill shot. But I'm a doe caught in the headlights. I can't do anything. He has control over me.
Kirkland moves his lips lightly against my mouth, twining his fingers with mine. He kisses me on the lips. Then he forces his tongue through. He breathes rapidly as he brings himself closer to me. I can feel hot tears run down my face. I have to stand up for myself, stop what's going to happen. But I don't have the strength, don't know how…
Then, Kirkland is thrown off of me. A lone figure holds him and he spits at him. He looks like he's about to say something when the figure speaks first.
"Stay away from my woman, ya perverted dog."
The accent is instantly recognizable. I make out the outline of Alec and cry out his name. He smirks at me, and Arthur takes that moment to push him away. He pulls out a gun and points it towards me. Alec regains his composure and Arthur points it towards him. Left, right, left, right, he threatens us with the metal object. His eyes are wide but determined, but so are Alec's.
"Drop the gun, brother."
"I'll only drop it when I shoot one of your heads off!"
He shouts this. He's gone past his breaking point. I can see the insanity hidden in his eyes, his movements. Broken and ready to burst.
"You don't want to do this."
Alec is saying this slowly, putting his hands up for added effect. Arthur hesitates before pointing it at me. I decide it's my turn to say something.
"Whatever has happened won't change, even if you kill us."
"You don't understand, do you?"
He smiles broadly, a fake smile on his face.
"Because of you killing that girl they're calling our prison racially partial! You know what that means? It means we'll be shut down because you killed a black girl. In my prison. Under my watch. They're shutting us down and making sure I never work again!"
"And how will this change if you shoot me?"
As if I helped him choose, he directed the gun towards me. His hands stopped shaking. I gulped.
"If I kill you, I can say that it couldn't be stopped. You have no records except your criminal ones. Not even a hometown. I could fill it with enough information to make you seem mentally insane. They couldn't say it was done for racial reasons then."
My eyes widened and his smirk somehow got bigger. A flash of movement caught him off guard and his gun was grabbed by Alec. Out of the corner of my eye I had seen him creeping over, but I didn't take note of it. Too dangerous. Arthur tried to grab it from him but Alec drew the gun up to where he was.
"Step away, brother. Step away right now."
"You don't have the guts to shoot me."
"You're right, I don't. But she does."
He threw the gun to me and I caught it easily. I automatically readied it to him and closed my left eye. Arthur changed his attitude to a joking one.
"H-hey now, we don't need to do this! You don't have to shoot me!"
I kept the gun pointed at him. Arthur's adam's apple bobbed as he gulped and he played with his tie nervously.
"L-look, I'll just leave and forget this ever happened, alright? No one will know about what happens tonight."
"You're right, they won't."
I dropped my level of the gun. Alec and Arthur stared at me in wonder. Waiting for what I would say next. I held my hand out to the Warden.
"Come with us, Arthur."
"Are you bloody insane?"
"According to you I am, but that won't stop me from offering. Come with us and you can stop this whole downward spiral thing before it gets out of control. Get rid of the schizophrenia."
Arthur stopped his protesting.
"How do you know about that?"
"I've been to five prisons, I know what the crazy people are like. Staying there isn't healthy for you, especially when you can't keep a serious relationship."
Alec didn't say anything. He knew I could handle the situation now. Arthur's face of rage turned into one of consideration, and I knew that he would come along.
"I'm sorry, but I…I can't just leave the place. Maybe you and my brother can, but I can't. I've worked there as long as I can remember. I don't know whether what you say is true or not, but I know that my place is there, not with you."
To describe the shock on my face would be impossible. Just when I thought that the Warden could leave it all behind him and save himself, he turned his back. I looked at Alec and he lip mouthed to me to leave it alone. I didn't want to. The feeling of being imprisoned was not me. I couldn't let someone else suffer the way I did.
Drops of water hit my head. I glanced up to see the sky falling. I looked ahead of me and felt Arthur kiss me. He held my face in his hands, smiling sadly. He then looked at Alec.
"Take good care of her. And if you don't I'll kick your arse. Got it?"
Alec smiled lightheartedly at his kin.
"I will."
Arthur nodded and let go of me, stepping back. His eyes traced down me, head to toe. Taking in a mental picture. After another minute he picked up the gun and put it back in its holster. I watched with interest. He was just going to leave us. Just like that. I glanced over at Alec and saw the sorrow in his eyes. He had protected his brother so sharply, he must've hated to separate from him.
But then he grabbed my hand, intertwining our fingers. He gave a small smile to Arthur and Arthur smiled back. Seeing brothers permanently part ways always made a gloomy scene. Arthur turned his heel and started walking away in the rain. To me the moment was picturesque. To Alec it was heartbreaking.
The rain started to beat down lighter and then stopped altogether. Alec glanced at me with a hopeful gleam in his eyes. I gave him the same look back. Finally, freedom. I might've not gotten to it the way I expected it but I got it all the same. In some ways I wish I could've gone with a blow out, like the stir up of the religious debate. I always thought about it but I never really got the plan going. I was too involved with Arthur. I was too involved with myself.
The sun still hadn't come up. I still had a chance to go back and complete what life I had back there, back in Nitella Fields Penitentiary. I chose not to. My real future was already calling me. The future where I would travel the world, and maybe settle down with Alec. Maybe. But for now I had to take the first step into freedom.
I did.
~Fin~