Camp Rock
Chapter 14
My own version of Camp Rock told in Shane's point of viewWell apparently, everyone in camp is going hiking. I, of course, want to do anything but hiking, but apparently I have no choice. Right now I'm packing my backpack. Oh and you know what's even better? We're spending five whole nights in a tent. A fucking tent! Shoot me now…
Jason, Nate, and I will be sharing a tent. Uncle Brown gave me a tent all nicely and neatly tucked away into a little bag. Jason's carrying it. I shoved the tent at Jason and he gave me a confused look. Nate was carrying his own backpack and so was I.
Wait a second… Is this really such a bad thing? We could get back at Tess… Hmm. This could get very interesting… I grabbed my walkie-talkie. "Sexy Beast to Lemon Cookie. You there? Over,"
A few moments later I heard, "Lemon Cookie here. Over,"
"Come to the MoFo cabin. Over,"
"Be right there. Over,"
I went over to the planning table and started thinking of ideas. Jason and Nate sat down next to me. Nate wrote down two really good ideas and then Mitchie came. "Hey," I said. "Sit,"
She sat down at the table and looked at the journal. "Planning something for the hiking trip?"
I nodded. "Any ideas?"
"Yeah," she said and grabbed the journal from Nate. She started scribbling in it… she was… drawing?
"What the hell are you drawing?" I asked.
"A cartoon," she replied, like it was nothing out of the ordinary.
I looked over at it, but she covered it up with her hands. "Wait 'till I'm finished! Gees Louise!" I rolled my eyes and sat back down.
After a couple minutes, she showed it to me. I laughed. She drew some stick figures, supposedly Mitchie, Tess, and me. One of the pictures was us pushing her off a cliff. Another one was a bear attacking her tent, and the last one was me telling a scary ghost story and then a ghost attacking her. Hey, that last one could actually be do-able!
I pointed to the last picture. "Let's do that," I said.
She nodded. "Yeah. But how?"
I pondered (whoa that's a big word!) this for a moment. "We could get Brownie to tell a scary ghost story or something and then when Tess is sleeping, pretend to be that ghost!"
"Or! Or! Or!" Jason screeched.
"What are you? A seal?" I asked.
"Or we could record some scary message and play it all night long in her tent. Like record 'they are coming for you' and play it really low at night," Jason suggested.
I gave Jason a weird look. "I didn't know you were smart. That's brilliant!"
"I'm not an idiot…" he muttered.
"Yes you are,"
He sighed. "Fine,"
Uncle Brown knocked on the door to my cabin. "We're leaving soon," he informed us. I let out a loud groan, telling my uncle that I really didn't want to do this. I grabbed my backpack and slung it over my shoulder. "Yeah, yeah. Piss and moan all you want but you're still going," Uncle Brown told me.
We went out of the cabin and gathered around by the other campers at the dining hall. I kicked the dirt a couple of times and threw some rocks. I didn't attempt to hit anyone, but I think I might have gotten a couple of stupid kids.
When everyone was ready, we all began walking. After a couple minutes I groaned. "Are we there yet, Brownie?" I asked.
My uncle shook his head. "We haven't even gotten out of camp yet,"
Ugh. This is going to be a long day.
We kept on walking. Finally, we made it to the mountain and then actually started hiking. And boy it was NOT easy. I kept on tripping a couple of times. "Fucking rocks…" I mumbled.
Then, I tripped over a tree stump and fell flat on my face. Everyone stopped and looked at me. I screamed a couple of swear words and then got back up, only to see that my leg was bleeding. "Great," I mumbled. "Now I'm gonna die,"
"You're not going to die," Uncle Brown retorted.
"You don't know that, Brownie! RABIES! RABIES! RABIES!" I yelled. I think everyone thinks I'm crazy.
Uncle Brown grabbed my arm. "Shh! You're being really embarrassing!" he whispered.
I rolled my eyes and continued hiking. I saw a squirrel. I pointed to it. "I bet that squirrel has rabies. Rabies, Brownie, rabies! You know people can die from rabies, right? So, we could die out here. I think we should turn back,"
My uncle ignored me and we kept on hiking. I started fake coughing. "Oh no, I think I have the flu or rabies. Well, I better go back to camp; no point in getting everyone sick," I said and turned around.
Uncle Brown grabbed my arm. "Stop being retarded and suck it up!"
I sighed and turned back around, continuing to go on the death march up the mountain. I kept on groaning and letting out over-dramatic sighs. If I were my uncle Brown, I'd be pretty mad at myself right now.
Around dinnertime, we finally made it to the top of Mount Kill Yourself and we set up all of our tents. Jason was having a hard time trying to get the damn tent out of the bag and Uncle Brown came over to us. "Helpless pieces of shit…" he muttered and set up our tent.
I waited until Nate set up the sleeping bags in the tent to get in it. "Hello tent," I said as I went in it. "My name's Shane… and I hate your fucking guts,"
Nate and Jason gave me confused looks as I crawled in my sleeping bag. "What?" I asked. "I'm tired. Leave me alone and got get me a hot dog or something," I ordered them and laid my head on the pillow.
They shrugged and set off. About fifteen minutes later, they returned with a plate of food. I ate it and then shoved the plate back at Nate. "Throw it away for me," I commanded.
Nate rolled his eyes and left the tent. Jason fell asleep in the sleeping bag to the far right and I was on the far left. Nate slept in the middle.
Right before I drifted off to dream land, I began to think about this whole situation. I'm in a tent. In the wilderness. There are bugs. And bears. And rabid squirrels. And I just ate a hot dog. I hate hot dogs. Oh, and I need to plot revenge on Tess. Hopefully a rabid squirrel will bite her.