Chapter 10: A New Reason

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"I used to stand so tall
I used to be so strong
Your arms around me tight
Everything felt so right
Unbreakable
Like nothing could go wrong
Now I can't breathe
No, I can't sleep
I'm barely hanging on
Here I am once again
I'm torn into pieces
Can't deny it, can't pretend
...

Broken up deep inside
But you won't get to see the tears I cry
Behind these hazel eyes"

-Behind These Hazel Eyes by Kelly Clarkson

Nanda's POV:

"Alright then." I looked to Scorpius. It was odd how fast we had grown to be friends. Only a week ago he had told me about his problem. 'I don't want to be a Malfoy anymore. Do you think you could help me with that? I have no idea what to do.' I took a few days to think about it. He had told me that he had to be disowned, when there was actually another option for getting away. And that is where our new (and might I add, illegal) training came in. "Next, we try the spell on ourselves." We were back to the lake by now, the bright sun slowly lowering itself from the sky, but not quite too low yet, so that it still sent yellow beams of light to shimmer across the waters. I made a mental note to see how my music would work with such a beautiful lake.

"Right then." Scorpius pulled his wand from his robes. He seemed so sure of himself, and so confident in being who he was. But I could only guess how awful his life was if he wanted to get away from his family. His hand rose and pointed his wand at himself. "Razza hominus." He shut his eyes tightly, but nothing happened.

"Nothing is happening" I told him after he didn't open his eyes.

"Oh." He opened his eyes and looked around himself.

I thought to myself. Why wouldn't it work? Maybe it can't be cast on oneself? "Let me try." I pulled my wand out and pointed it at him. "Razza hominus." My magic flowed more easily than my music had earlier. I was still having a hard time believing such a force was inside me. It had once been so docile, but it had almost destroyed the hills I had come to love. My dad had been able to clean them up, but the bare trees would have to be given time to regrow their leaves. Little bits of light shimmered and surrounded Scorpius. He remained completely still watching them as they swirled around him.

They finally floated off him, in a sort of line, like follow-the-leader, settling on the watery shore of the lake. They set miniature ripples across the water's surface, but spelled out distinct words. "Leporidae" I read. "What does that mean?"

"Is that a sort of animal? Whatever it is, it doesn't sound like I would want to transform into it." Scorpius scrunched his nose.

"It sounds like it's Latin. Maybe it's a classification."

"A what?"

I laughed quietly to myself. "Classification. It's how muggles have organized living things. There are six kingdoms, then different Phylums, Classes, Orders, Families, and then a genus and species. Maybe it's the name of one."

"Alright. How do we know for sure?"

I thought to myself. I was sure it would take years to find it in any book in the Hogwarts library. Of course, I had a library where I could find it within an instant. But my dad already told me that I shouldn't leave school. I would definitely get in some trouble. Unless, of course… I smiled.

"What?" Scorpius asked. "What's so funny?"

"I have an idea. But first, write that down and then you can try the spell on me."

Scorpius shrugged and pulled some parchment and a self-inking pen from his pocket to copy down the word. He folded up the parchment and placed it back in his pocket, replacing his wand to his hand. He looked to me, and I tried to prepare myself for being surrounded by little specks of light. "Razza hominus." I inhaled. After a moment, nothing happened, and I released my breath soundlessly. Scorpius scrunched his nose. "Razza hominus."

I bit my lip. Can he not cast it? It made me curious as to how I could. "Uh, are you casting it all right?"

Scorpius huffed. "I think so." He looked at his wand, almost as if it was the one that had done something wrong. It made my mind whirl as to why he would blame his wand.

"If you don't mind me asking," And I really hope you don't mind me asking, I thought. "How long did it take to get your wand?"

He looked down and shrugged. "A really long time. Almost until the store closed. We finally just bought one."

I was almost immediately sorry I asked. He looked so defeated; nothing like his usual confidence. It was disturbing, in a way. I would rather he be confident and rude like a normal Slytherin rather than this. But of course, if things went the way I wanted, I would never have been in this situation (but maybe talking to Marcie instead). He fell silent, and I had the dire urge to break the new silence that had entered.

"Well, what kind of wand is it?"

"Rowen with dragon heartstring. 7 inches."

Nanda looked at Scorpius' wand. It was almost awkward in his hands. It obviously didn't belong there, but I had no idea what sort of wand might; I wasn't a wand maker, nor did I have any knowledge of wandlore. It wouldn't be smart to give him my wand. What to do then? "Well, I'll cast it on myself then. I'll read up on wands later, and we'll get you a new one." I smiled. "One that works better."

He sighed. "Alright."

I pointed my wand at my head. "Razza hominus," and little specks of light swirled around me. They almost tickled, like I was soaring through the air, carried by the slightest breeze. And just as they had started, they stopped swirling and floated to the floor before me.

"Aves" I read. "Write this down, too. We can go to the library later. But right now, I think it's time for lunch."

Scorpius looked over to where I was looking. Other students that were outside were heading back inside.

"Alright" he said as he finished copying it all down. He folded the parchment back up and put it in his pocket, followed by his wand. I grabbed the book and put it away as well.

"Off we go."

3rd person POV:

They made their way to the Great Hall, Scorpius trudging behind Nanda, concerned that he might not want others to see him even remotely close to him. Nanda was busy looking about the school, admiring the lovely architecture, but feeling a bit sad that it was not made for carrying out beautiful notes on forever, to be lost in the air itself, and sending chills down the spine of every last listener (because he had daydreams about such a thing every moment he got. What he would give to have an instrument...). There was nothing more appealing to him, at the moment of course, than lunch. After all that hard training (which would really have been hard had they not been who they were) had left him famished. He smiled and looked back to Scorpius.

"Hurry on. We don't want to be late for lunch."

Scorpius didn't catch the hint at all, but did hurry on to Nanda's side, still worrying about what he would say to him once they reached the doors. Probably something awful. But it was alright. As long as they were friends, he could stand being alone some of the time. They had now joined a crowd of other students, all making their way to lunch. Scorpius could feel other students look at him, their eyes burning holes in him. He wanted to look the floor, hoping they would look away, but his first instinct was to find them, and give them a sneer, to show he wasn't afraid, even if he was. His eyes scanned the crowd, only to find that he met no eyes at all.

The doors came to them faster than they would have thought. Nada stepped through them without any effort or cares, already heading to his table just to his left. He wanted to talk to his friends, enjoy lunch, and let his troubles leave him. As carefree as he seemed, something had been itching at the back of his mind, though he couldn't put his finger on it, and he would have nightmares about something, only to wake up and not remember a thing about it. Grant and Vanan had asked him several times during the night what had happened, only to get the same answer each time.

Feeling alone once more, Scorpius broke off Nanda's path, and made his way to the Slytherin table.

"Scorpius" Nanda called to him. "You're not going to sit with us?"

The looks that burn…all that awful attention…all those hard eyes… Scorpius knew what would happen, and he tried to avoid it at all costs. "I'd rather sit with a fire breathing dragon" and then he turned back to his table.

"Oh," Nanda said, more to himself since Scorpius had left. He was unusually sad, but, of course, he had said he would rather he be a rude Slytherin than not. He sighed and sat down by his friends, his music making the slightest push against palms.

"So, his first year isn't going that great then?" Harry asked Tom. They had been discussing their son for a while now, and his sudden emotional outbreak (not to mention that he left school when he shouldn't have. But their boy wasn't a trouble-maker. There had to be a good reason.) "Did you ask him what was wrong?"

"No. I only told him he should be back at Hogwarts." Tom sighed. He loved his son, just as much as he loved Harry, and it hurt him to see him like that. "But I don't believe it would have to do with school. He would have told us if it had."

"What on earth could do that to him?"

And just like an answer to all their problems, a doe made of light entered the room. "Harry, Tom" it greeted, its familiar voice immediately catching their attention. "You both will meet me in my office after lunch. I have important information that concerns you." And then as quickly as it came, it faded into nothing.

"It must have to do with Bellatrix and her gang." Harry stood up, pulling his wand from his pocket instantly.

"Harry, Severus said after lunch." Tom stood as well, placing a hand on Harry's shoulder. He knew Harry could go without meals, but it pained Tom to see him do so. It brought back memories that would only plague his mind.

"I'm not hungry." He apparated to Snape's office, and sat down in the chair just before the desk, waiting for Snape to return, since he wasn't currently there. Tom sighed and sat in the chair next to him.

Lunch was almost over, but Nanda had barely touched his food. Something still itched in the back of his mind, and the more the thought about it, the more it would fade away, and he would think it was nothing. But the moment it left his mind, it itched again, begging him to figure it out.

"Hey, Nanda, are you sure you're alright?" Grant asked him, and he focused back on his table of friends.

"Yea, I'm fine. Just a bit stressed. Have you ever gotten the feeling your missing something very important, but you can't remember what it is?"

"Sometimes." Grant replied.

"Oh yes!" said Vanan. "I absolutely despise that. I tried finding it out once by reading a book that smelt awfully like a pie my grandmother used to make me. I got so lost in the smell, I completely forgot about the odd feeling."

Lysander and Lorcan smiled, but Lysander actually had expression to his face while his brother held that blank stare. Grant snickered and Nanda couldn't help but let a laugh go. They never really understood his stories, but they were always so odd, they made everyone want to laugh.

"Well, I'm going to go see if I can figure it out before I head to the library. I'll see you guys later, then." Nanda stood and left with a wave.

Once in the hall, Nanda could see Snape off in the distance. He'll know what I should do. He followed after him, hoping he was going to his office (which Nanda figured he was. He was going that direction, anyway). The hallways were empty, but definitely not quiet, since the loudness of the Great Hall rang through and bounced off the walls. Not that Nanda was particularly looking forward to another chat with Snape, especially after what they had talked about earlier, but he had the urge to call to him, and make sure that he wasn't off to do something important. He bit his tongue, though, and kept following.

Snape was now before the door to his office, and the spiraled stairs appeared before him. He didn't usually take the long way, but he wanted to take his time getting to Harry, for he knew how he would feel about what he was about to tell him, and Tom (but mostly Harry). He sighed and started up the stairs. Nanda, closer behind him now, quietly walked behind him up the stairs.

"Hello, Harry, Tom. I'm sure you both are waiting for the news I told you I would relay" Nanda stopped. His dads were up there. What were they doing at Hogwarts? What news was there to tell? "And I have every intension of informing you as quickly as possible, so I will get to my point."

"Thank you, Severus" said his dad. What on earth was going on?

"Hermione was doing as you asked, Harry, and researching Nanda's background. What she found may very well shock you, as well as provide a new threat. She found a friend of his biological father, and asked him for information about it. He kindly donated memories, and so we have an amazing record of what happened.

"His mother was a muggle. His father kept from her that he was a wizard until they had Nanda. Once he broke the news to her, she saw him as inhuman, and left him. His father was so depressed, and only grew more so as time went on. When Nanda was three, he finally committed suicide, and the friend put him in the orphanage where you adopted him two years later.

"That, of course, is disturbing, yes, but not exactly why I called you here. His grandfather was part Erlking. He seduced women, raped them, and then murdered them afterward. Of course, he was a wizard as well, and he was able to escape the law by use of magic, as well as escape the Ministry by using a sort of illegal magic that Hermione and I have yet to understand, but has something to do with a complex sort of wandless magic. We have reason to assume it may be connected with Nanda's magic, since he does not need a wand to make music, but it seems that he does not have the extent his grandfather did. His father showed absolutely no signs of this, at all. This sort of power may skip generations, and Nanda's children may be affected, or it may be completely docile once it is no longer the dominant blood."

Nanda's eyes widened. They had obviously kept a lot of information from him earlier, but now that he wasn't supposed to be listening, it all came out. So, his Aunt Hermione had actually talked with Hirm, and his grandfather was worse than they had explained, and his Erlking blood could be dangerously powerful. Why hadn't they told him? He should have known these things. He should have been the first to know.

"Severus, what do you mean he does not show the extent his grandfather did?"

"Well, from what we know, it is just a little hobby he has. Hermione and I have never seen him do anything destructive with it, or even be able to do much more than create little tunes. We have guessed that the Erlking blood may be thinning ou-"

"It has been destructive" his papa said. "Just earlier today, he came home, and he completely destroyed the trees outside the manor. Tom saw him. He couldn't even walk closer to him until he was finished with it. He created a storm out of nothing, with winds that blew a few of the smaller trees out of the ground, and left all of them without leaves."

He didn't want to hear this anymore. Nanda could feel the random anger rise within him as his music formed a sort of tornado inside him. He didn't want to hear what he had done to his precious hills, or what his blood relatives had done, or what was wrong with him. But he couldn't leave. He had to know why. He had to know why his dads were there, and why his music was dangerous, and why he was a threat. Why…

The room was quiet a moment. The back of Nanda's eyes burned, and he could feel the tears build up.

"Severus" his dad almost whispered. "What threat does this pose?"

Snape was silent a moment more before replying. "Bellatrix has been looking for something new. She wants a sort of weapon against you both. What would be more convenient against an enemy than to take their son and have him be the power behind success?"

Nanda lost his breath, like it had been punched out of his lungs. He was speechless. Someone wanted to take him and use him against his dads? He couldn't think of anything more horrible. He slowly made his way back down the stairs and out into the hallway, in a sort of numbness. School didn't much matter anymore. He obviously had much bigger problems.

"Over my dead body." Harry was shaking with rage. "If that bitch thinks she will even lay a finger on him, I will kill her with my bare hands." His emerald eyes were sharp and fierce.

"What should we do, Severus?" Tom was just as concerned (if not more concerned) about Nanda. Of course, killing people is not enough to stop evil. He never expected Voldemort to reign on, even if Tom had personally killed him.

"For now, we must keep this information a secret. If Bellatrix doesn't know of it, she will have less of a motive to take him. You both will tell no one, not even Hermione, or Ron. No one is to know. Just us in this room."

"What of Nanda?" Tom asked.

"We already told him of his heritage, which may very well be the reason he was so destructive, but I fear what would happen if he learned of Bellatrix. Do not tell him."

Harry ran a clawed hand through his hair in frustration, and Tom stood. "We won't" he said. "Not until it may be better avoided if he knew." He placed a hand on Harry's shoulder and they apparated back to the manor. When they arrived, Harry was in tears. "What's wrong, love? Nanda is in no danger right now. He will be just fine."

Through sobs, Harry managed "But he's just like me. The same fucking villain chasing after him in his first year. I never wanted him to be like me. I…" he lay down on the couch of the sitting room in a ball. "I don't want him to be cursed like me."

Wooh! That took some time out of my day. I tried all week to write this, but I only had about a paragraph before I had to get off again. I had to spend all day today finishing it. Was it okay? Review and tell me! I love reviews! :)