Camp Revenge Season 2

Camp Revenge Season 2

Chapter 8: "People Don't Change"

People. Don't. Change. We stay our usual messed up, dark and twisty selves. But in some cases, people stay bright and shiny. No one changes. Change scares me. I like to stick to what I know.

"Mitchie?" I asked. Mitchie was standing in the kitchen.

She looked up at me. "I ate everything,"

"What?" I asked, approaching her.

Mitchie pointed to the fridge. "I ate EVERYTHING in this kitchen – even the tub of butter. Last night. I ate it all,"

I stared at her, a shocked expression played across my face.

"It's a good thing calories don't count when no one sees you eat them,"

I slowly nodded and came closer to her. "You ate everything," I said. "Are you ever gonna do it again?"

She pondered and then shook her head. "Never,"

I raised my eyebrows. "Never ever?"

"Never ever ever,"

"Never ever ever ever?"

"Ok, I'm done with this," she said.

I crossed my arms. "So am I,"

She crossed her arms, too. "Well good then,"

"Good," I said.

"So are you still my prince?" she asked.

I shrugged and put my hands in my pockets. "I don't know. Are you still my princess?" I smiled.

Mitchie smiled and hugged me. "I'll go get my princess costume on!" she exclaimed and then ran.

"Wha – wait!" I called out after her. When she had already run off, I sighed and went back to my cabin. She'd make me put on my tux anyways, so might as well just put it on now.

We met up in the dining hall for breakfast. Jason and Nate were sitting at our table, eating pancakes. Me and my tux and Mitchie and her "princess costume" sat down next to them.

Jason looked at us and then narrowed his eyes. "Since when did you become royale? Is there someone I should know about? Is your mum a queen?"

"Idiots are fun… no wonder every village wants one," I said and grabbed one of Jason's pancakes.

He looked at me and said, "What did you just do?"

"I stole your pancake," I said and shoved it in my mouth.

Jason gave me a confused look. "What?"

"I. Stole. Your. Pancake. I took it off you plate and now I'm eating it," I said.

"Are you kidding?" He asked. "Yanking my chain? Jk-ing me?"

I shrugged. "If I were kidding, I'd dress like you,"

Jason gave me another confused look.

"That top makes you look like an Afghani prostitute," I said, pointing to his shirt.

He looked down at his shirt. "How so?"

"You know, when you think about it, the more I mock you, the more it proves my respect for you," I told him.

Mitchie turned to me. "Why are you suddenly being so mean?"

"Sorry," I apologized. "I get angry when I go without sleep,"

She shook her head. "It's not that. I watched you sleep,"

"Stalker," I muttered.

"Point is – you slept. That's not the reason why you're being so mean – it's because you've changed. You went from mean to nice to mean again… Are you PMSing?"

I scoffed. "People don't change. For example, I'm gonna keep on repeating 'people don't change,'"

She half-smiled. "You changed,"

"Well I could say the same thing about you,"

"Oh really?"

"Yeah. You used to be bright and shiny. Now you're so dark and twisty… People don't learn; people don't change. But you did. You're a freak," I said.

"I'm a freak?" she asked.

I nodded. "Oh yeah,"

"That's sweet," Mitchie smiled.

"Shut up," I muttered.

"No, really. It's all warm and fuzzy," she laughed.

I looked over at Nate who was staring at someone across the dining hall, his head rested on his hand. I looked over to where he was staring and saw that girl – what's her face? – Mitchie's friend… Caitlyn?

I snapped my fingers to get Nate's attention. He quickly sat back up. "Huh? What?" he asked.

I let out a huff of laughter. "You were checking that girl out," I said.

He rolled his eyes. "Was not," Then, he hushed his voice to a whisper, "Why? Does she like me or something? Do you know?"

I shrugged. "She's one of Mitchie's friends,"

With the mention of her name, Mitchie turned around. "What? What about my friends?"

I pointed to Caitlyn. "Her. Friend. Yes?"

Mitchie looked over and nodded. "Yes, that's Caitlyn. Why?"

I chuckled. "Well, well, my friend is in love with one of my girl friend's friends… Hey, maybe we can double date!"

Nate scoffed. "I'm not in love with her!"

"Not yet at least," I said, slightly tilting my head to the side and smiling.

"You shut up," he muttered.

"You go die," I retorted.

"What? That was hostile and uncalled for!" he scoffed.

I put on a fake pouting face. "Aww. Little Nate is upset… Just remember, if you sometimes feel a little useless, offended, or depressed, just remember that YOU were once the fastest and most victorious sperm out of millions,"

Nate started laughing. "That is so wrong on so many levels,"

"What can I say?" I asked. "We live in perverted times, my friend… so about your little girlfriend…" I started.

Nate leaned in close. "What about her? Does she like me? Did she tell you?"

I put on a fake shocked expression. "Slow down there, Mario!" I shook my head and put my hands on the table. "Listen, Nate, if you really want to go out with her, just tell her how you feel,"

"Tell her how I feel?!" Nate exclaimed. "I don't speak girl! Girls are complicated!"

Mitchie scoffed. "Girls are not complicated. Seriously. How hard is it to say, 'Your pretty,' and give us a box of chocolates?"

"Chocolate, eh?" I asked.

She nodded. "Yeah. We love chocolate,"

"Who's we?"

"We whose sex organs are aesthetically pleasing," she said.

I narrowed my eyes. "Did you just insult me in pig Latin?"

Mitchie laughed. "No,"

"So you like chocolate?" I asked.

"Duh," she said.

I smiled. "Want to meet me tonight at nine by the lake and we can make some s'mores – extra chocolate?"

She laughed. "I'd love to – it's a date,"

"Definitely," I said, and looked over at Nate who was walking over to Caitlyn.

Nate walked past Caitlyn and smiled. She smiled back. Nate went back over to her. "So do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?"

I laughed at Nate's expense, but surprisingly, Caitlyn got up and they walked out of the dining hall together. Mitchie and I looked at each other and then burst out laughing.

We stood up. "So let's go back to the castle and we can rule over our kingdom," Mitchie said.

"Oh really? What's our kingdom's name?"

She shrugged. "Haven't decided yet,"

Mitchie and I walked out of the dining hall and back to my cabin. I was just walking along when I noticed that Mitchie wasn't next to me. I looked back and saw her gawking at my uncle's cabin, a shocked look played across her face.

I went back over to her. "What the hell's your problem?" I asked.

She pointed to the cabin. "My mommy's a filthy, filthy, whore!"

I looked in the window only to see Mitchie's mum on top of my uncle, wearing nothing but lacy red underwear. My jaw dropped and I looked at Mitchie.

"EWWW!!" We screamed at the same time.

"Oh, God. Oh, God!" I exclaimed, practically hyperventilating. "That's so sick and wrong and twisted and.. NASTY! And oh my God! My uncle and your mum…"

"EWWW!" We screamed again.

I'm going to need liquor… lots and lots of liquor.