I turned off my cell phone and sat on the edge of the bed, looking at Rose.
"Christian said that he found a new apartment, a safe one, that he and Lissa are moving into tomorrow and that she's fine. Physically I mean," I added.
She nodded, tugging the comforter closer to her.
"I'm glad," was all she said, voice barely above a whisper.
The past three days since she'd woken up, Rose has been in a slump, the full force of everything that happened finally hitting her all at once. The fact that her face had been so scarred didn't help much either.
The first day, when I noticed how quiet and distant she was and would always turn her back to me, I tried reassuring her as I'd done the day before. She just couldn't seem to grasp that I still loved and wanted her and that the scars didn't matter.
The second day, I climbed into bed beside her and put in a few movies that I thought would cheer her up. This was an idea my mother suggested when I'd called and told her what happened.
"Poor Roza," she'd sighed.
I could hear the sincerity and care in her voice. I was glad my family had taken to Rose so well and already welcomed her to the family.
"How is she? She must feel terrible."
"She won't get out of bed," I told her, checking to make sure Rose couldn't overhear. "She just lays there or sleeps…with her head under the pillow."
"Lot's of people sleep with their head under their pillow," my mother said.
"Yes but not inside the pillowcase," I exclaimed.
"Well, she's been through a hard time. Try to understand Dimka, this may sound a bit sexist to you but woman are usually a bit more sensitive about the way they look and how the people around them see them."
I sighed.
"Rose is going to hurt for a while but eventually, one day things won't seem as bad and she'll come around. I hope," she added.
"Me too. I've told her how much she means to me and that the scars don't matter but she thinks I'm just pitying her. What do you think I should do?"
"You can either give her space and hope she comes around on her own or you can just try being there, close to her, acting normal like nothings changed," she suggested.
And when that didn't work and the third day came around, I decided to try distracting Rose from the horrid memories and her worries about her scars.
I got up early, as always, and made her favorite breakfast foods. I made everything from nice crisp bacon to fluffy pancakes, even taking the time draw on smiling faces with whip cream.
I carried the tray of food into the bedroom; almost spilling the glass of freshly squeezed orange juice. Rose was already awake. She did a double take upon seeing me and actually sat up in bed leaning against the headboard.
"What's all of this?" she asked, her voice low and husky.
"This is me bringing you a nice breakfast in bed." I sat the tray at her lap and moved in beside her. "Today is all about me and you."
"Everyday is about me and you. We're almost always together," she smiled, barely, but it was a smile.
"Yes but today I'm going to spoil you. We're going to devour this beautiful breakfast I made and then we're going to go to the medieval fair at the park and then skating and lastly fireworks at the beach followed by a light show and ice cream," I listed.
She stared, her mouth agape, unbelieving the long list of activities I'd planned out.
"Wow," she gasped. "But Dimitri-"
"Maybe we can even go to a movie at the old drive in or dancing even though I don't dance much but-"
"Dimitri," she said interrupting.
"Hmm?" I dipped her fork into the scrambled eggs I'd made and motioned it to her mouth. She chewed and swallowed, contentedly before speaking again.
"I don't need all of those things or this beautiful breakfast."
"You don't? But I thought it might take your mind off of…" I let the sentence carry on its self.
"And I appreciate that…and everything else you've done lately even if it hasn't seemed like it. I woke up and was thinking this morning about…EVERYTHING and I realized- after you'd already told me like a million times- that you were right. I just have to get used to being this way and that it really doesn't matter. I thought I'd have to hide for the rest of my life and that staying hidden was the only thing that matters. All that matters…all that I need is you."
I felt my face lift into a wide smile and leaned in to kiss her cheek, the scarred side.
She returned my smile with a gentle one of her own and pecked a quick kiss to my lips.
"I love you," she said when she'd pulled away, still inches from my face.
"I love you too. Always."
"And forever."
"I'm glad that you've decided that your pure happiness means only being with me but we can still have that fun filled day I'd planned," I suggested.
She thought about it, nibbling on her lip.
"How about we just go to the fair and the beach."
"Sounds like a plan my love."
We finished the entire breakfast and quickly dressed to go outside for the first time.
Pulling on a t-shirt and jeans, I had expected Rose to come out of the bathroom wearing all black and a thick hoodie.
She surprised me yet again, by wearing her favorite violet peasant skirt, a white tank top, exposing her arms, barely marked by any wounds, and a tattered pair of Chuck's.
Her face was completely exposed, the headband she'd put on pushing her thick hair back and away from her face.
She came out trembling but trying to smile.
"I can do this," she whispered.
I went behind her, wrapping my arms securely around her waist and kissed every inch of her neck.
"Yes you can and I'll be with you all of the way."
"I know." She turned, shifting in my arms, and went on her tiptoes to kiss me. It wasn't the quick, short peck she'd normally planted on me before pulling away. It was a long, meaningful, full-of-emotion kiss. There was something different about the feel of her lips on mine, a good kind of different, a change that occurred between us without either of us knowing. If I had to name it, it was like our love only grew stronger after the last week and a half, with every obstacle that had been put in our way and it kept growing.
I tightened my hand at the small of her back wanting her as much and as close to me as possible. I wanted all of Rose.
Her arms, around my neck, tightened briefly with a quick squeeze before we pulled away. Our lips lingered near each other long after.
"Let's go."
RPOV"Is it cheating if I brought a scarf?" I asked, tucking the end of the long white cloth in and making sure it was safe around my head and neck, my hair falling out from the back but a good portion of my face hidden.
We walked through the fair, little games and souvenir tables on either side of us.
Dimitri squeezed my hand and gave me that long, dazed and in love look he had after our kiss this morning.
"No. You'll take it off when you're comfortable and ready," he sounded sounding so philosophical.
I had a crick in my neck from glancing left and right, nervous that people were staring and pointing and laughing and cringing in discuss. No one seemed to even notice. In fact I think my bright scarf drew more attention away from my face.
I wanted to take it off and just not care but it was my first day out and I was taking baby steps.
We played a few games, the fun of it all keeping my mind away from my worries for a little while. Dimitri and I shared a funnel cake, went through a few mazes and even sat and watched a duel show.
Nibbling on a candy apple (and covered head to toe in princess and prince hats) we ended up at a long table covered in bright cloths and a beautiful, aged, fortuneteller behind it.
"I didn't think they had fortune tellers in medieval times," I said to the woman behind the table.
"We come and go in every century. I'm actually selling jewelry but if you want a reading I'll be happy to give you one," she offered, her long fingers extended.
"Oh no, I was just a little curious." I didn't need a fortuneteller to tell me how my life was going to go. I wanted to find out for my self. Things had changed and I wanted to see where those changes took me on my own.
I busied my self with looking at the bracelets and jewelry spread across the table, glittering and gleaming the light.
"Their so beautiful," I breathed, looking at one piece in particular.
It was two silver chains entwined, two charms, also silver, one shaped like the sun and the other like the moon strung up by their ends.
"How much for this one?" Dimitri asked following my gaze.
The fortuneteller woman had been looking at my face as I ran my eyes over the jewelry with knowing eyes.
"You've come from a life of great darkness and tragedy. You are happy now but you will be even happier later when darkness out shines your past and highlights your future," she predict, cryptically.
I felt exposed suddenly, someone I didn't even know, telling me all of this.
It was all true though.
It kind of sounded like something I expected Yeva to say.
She turned her attention to Dimitri and answered his earlier question.
"Normally I'd charge an arm and a leg for an item of this quality but for the both of you, whose love is extraordinary, nothing."
"Oh, I couldn't," I tried to decline.
She picked up the chain and handed it to Dimitri.
"Yes you can. I insist."
We thanked her and when she'd turned her back, Dimitri slid some money onto her table where she was sure to find it. We strolled through the park and sat down on a bench.
Dimitri pulled one of the necklaces, the sun, around my neck and the other around his. Together, the two charms connected like magnets.
"This is beautiful. Thank you."
"I like it. It even looks more amazing now that your scarf is off."
I gasped, not realizing my scarf had slid off of my head and hung around my neck by a simple tie. No wonder I felt a little exposed.
I moved my hands to pull the scarf up again but stopped realizing how silly it would be of me and just hugged Dimitri, smiling.
By the time we drove down and made it to the beach, it was early in the evening, the clouds rolling in and the waves about ten feet high. Our hair was flying in every which direction and people were getting restless waiting for the fireworks to start.
I didn't care though.
I was so wrapped up in Dimitri that everything around us seemed to fade out.
DPOVRose sat in front of me, leaning against my chest, lost in her own thoughts. She mindlessly caressed my hand that was wrapped around her.
She didn't even seem to notice how strong the wind was picking up and how thick and dark the clouds were becoming. Normally during Friday Night Fireworks, the weather was so clear, the skies viewable without a cloud in sight but lately the weather only seemed to worsen.
It didn't stop the boats and ships at see from lighting the fireworks. Simultaneously, one after another, the lights lit up the sky with the waves crashing and reseeding below. I watched Rose's face, the lights casting upon her face, and it brightened with each pop and bang of the fireworks.
She looked back up at me smiling, kissed me on the cheek and turned back to the fireworks. If I had the choice I could have sat here and watched her all day.
A lot had changed.
When I was a kid, a teenager, I'd always been worried that everything would keep changing and only for the worst. All of this time that I've grown up and become a man, it was true, everything kept changing no matter how hard I tried keeping things the same.
Thing's changed when my family expanded, which is a good thing, except for the few times my sisters moved out on there own. Thing's changed when I moved out and came into the city or when my entire family moved out here. There were changes when I lost my best friend Ivan and it was just Christian and I.
Part of the reason I never really made it far in any of the other relationships I tried was because I knew it meant a DEFINATE change.
Rose is the one constant in my life.
She was so different and worth the risk of making a life altering decision.
She still is worth it and I couldn't imagine losing her.
I hugged her a little tighter and kissed her from the top of her head to her temple, down to her neck.
She held her hand in my hair and smiled.
"Enjoying the fireworks?" She asked playfully.
"Mmm…you're much more interesting," I told her against her neck.
I felt the warmth of her skin and her touch and only wanted her that much more, to feel her that much more.
I wanted Rose in every way possible.
She'd told me all of the time how she was mine and that I'd always have her and I'd told her the same. I wanted her physically though, to feel every inch of her skin against my own, just the two of us alone together.
I kept kissing her neck and she shifted so that I could have better access.
I moved my hands up her waist and under her jacket and her t-shirt. Smoothly running my fingers across her skin. I felt her shudder beneath me but not from the cold.
She turned her head and moaned against my chest where my shirt was opened up.
My hands brushed the bottom of her bra and she stiffened but not in an uncomfortable way. It was all pure excitement and lust. Her deep eyes dances and gleamed in the reflect fireworks light.
She was purely beautiful and her scars only made her look exotic and much more unnaturally, amazingly, wonderfully… beautiful.
We were slowly moving to get closer to each other when we heard the ahs and oos around us suddenly realizing we weren't alone but on a public beach.
We sighed, looked around us, and then looked at each other. Rose moved off of my lap, straightening her shirt. She slid down onto the blanket we were sitting on, her hand resting against my chest.
"Let's go home," I suggested. The fireworks weren't as much of a fascination, nothing to me any more compared to Rose and the electric shock that went through my skin each time we touched.
She nodded eagerly, biting the bottom of her lip, tempting me to take her now.
We picked up our belongings and headed back toward the car. We maneuvered around the people, a few couples who we entangled them selves and treaded through the heavy sand.
I pulled Rose behind me, both of us starting to laugh when the rain began to fall. There were shouts of happiness and disappointment from the crowd and people started to scatter although some stayed.
Rose and I kept moving toward the car and finally made it inside, drenched from head to toe.
Our clothes hung and clung to our skin.
Starting the car, I handed Rose a cloth to dry her face with and she leaned over and kissed me still smiling and laughing, the thrill of tonight all around us.
When we pulled apart and she started patting the cloth around her face I stole a glance over at her, the skirt she was wearing clinging to all of the right places, even a little bit see through where it touched her skin and the sleeve of her jacket and her tank top fallen erotically off of her shoulder.
She turned to face me again and I cleared my throat, focusing on starting the car and pulling out.
"I don't think I've ever had this much fun," she giggled, tossing the cloth aside.
"Me either."
" You know, I used to come here ever Friday night to see the fireworks. They made me happy and made everything better," she told me staring out of the window.
She turned to me moments later.
"But I don't need the fireworks to make me feel better any more. I have you and I'm glad I have you," she whispered.
"I love you Roza." It was about the millionth time I'd said it but I knew she couldn't get enough of hearing it and it was the truth.
She grinned and clasped my hand.
"I know," she smiled.
"I know? That's all I get?" I asked laughing.
She moved her hand from my own and laid it on my knee. With her other hand she rested it against my cheek and tugged a strand of my dripping hair behind my ear.
"You'll get a lot more. Soon," she promised still caressing my cheek.
We sat in a comfortable silence the rest of the way home still touching.
RPOVThis was really going to happen.
Tonight.
All of this time Dimitri and I had been together, the thought of us having sex for the first time always lingered in the background and was never a big issue. All of my entire life it was never a worry or a problem of mine.
I was actually content with being a virgin for the rest of my life if it meant I'd never meet someone I loved enough and who loved me in return that I'd want to give my self to.
Lately, tonight, content wasn't enough for me any more.
I kept feeling like I wanted, no, needed Dimitri in every way possible and hopefully he wanted the same. Each time we kissed or just held each other I saw that look in his eyes that he wanted me too, especially tonight.
After everything we'd been through, really being together meant that much more to me.
When we slept in his bed together and he had his arm wrapped protectively around me or I lay across his chest, with my arm around his stomach, it took all of the strength and will power in the world to not act and try sleeping with him right then and there.
Tonight, we'd finally become one.
Was I nervous? Definitely.
Was I scared? Not as much knowing Dimitri would take care of me in every way possible and show the way.
Was I ready? Again, Definitely.
Now it was just about waiting for it to happen.
We walked up stairs into the apartment and suddenly everything became…slow and awkward, like we didn't know what to do or how to go about it and acting normal.
Dimitri closed the door behind us, locking it, and I stood in the middle of the living room, unsure of where to go.
Do I go to the bedroom first or…?
I wasn't even sure if I should go in there with all of the wet clothes I had on.
Dimitri sat his keys down, set our jackets on the floor so that we could dry them later after using them to shield our selves from the rain. I started noticing every detail around and about us so clearly.
The rain suddenly became so loud outside; the thunder sounded like it was rumbling directly above us, the apartment was too chilly without Dimitri close to me.
Dimitri…He moved about the house, putting plates and random objects where they belonged, straightening things that didn't need straightening. He leaned against the hallway wall and at first looked everywhere but at me and then rested his eyes on my own lastly.
His shirt clung to his skin, his arms, his jaw attractively clenched and muscles flexed and his hair curled from the rainfall and framed around his face.
I couldn't understand at first why he should be nervous and then it occurred to me that he didn't want to push me or he thought he'd be pressuring me by making the first move.
I didn't have the slightest clue how to initiate this or play out my sensuality.
Lissa always told me it came easy to me and that I did it without realizing what I was doing.
I hoped that was true because right now I felt very oblivious on how to turn sexual tension into one of the most important nights of my life.
I needed…something.
Something to show Dimitri that he wasn't pressuring and that I wanted him as much as he did me.
As if on cue, an answer from the skies, thunder rolled and lightening flashed scaring me. I jumped with a little awkward squeal and Dimitri moved to hold me. The lights flickered once, twice and then went out.
"It's alright. We're safe inside here," he reassures me.
I glance around, frightened at how dark it I, glad to have Dimitri's warm and secure embrace around me.
…around me.
I looked up at the same time he stared down at me and our eyes met.
I shifted in his arms and ran my hand up his arms and locked them around his neck.
His hands held me at my sides, firmly and warm.
We stood touching at ever point and the look in those eyes that I could practically fall into was just another step closer, another sign that this was the night.
DPOV
I leaned down and I kissed her.
Our earlier awkward moment completely gone and forgotten we kissed the same as we always had. We indulged in small pecks to the lips and took our time, slowly, coming together. Gradually, the kiss deepened, our mouths opening to let one another in.
She held my face on either side of my cheek and then locking her hands in my hair.
Her tongue brushed against my own our mouths moving together.
She nibbled and bit my lip smiling up at me playfully teasing.
And then that smile turned soft and seductive…
She pressed into me, signaling for me to move toward the bedroom.
I was worried I was being pushy and forward and asking too much of her but that smile said everything and told me she was ready.
She wasn't the teenage girl I had first pegged as weak when I first met her but a full young woman who looked and acted well beyond her years.
Our lips together again I stepped backward, Rose attached and coming with me. We stumbled into the hallway and growing impatient I lifted her into my arms and carried her the rest of the way into the bedroom without breaking the kiss. I closed the door behind me and laid her on the bed.
From this moment on, from the wanting and lust rolling off of both of us in waves, there was no going back. This was a change both of us was ready for and that would only make our love stronger.
RPOVI struggled with the buttons at Dimitri's shirt, my fingers trembling and shaky both from being wet and cold and from the nerves.
It was my very first time and I couldn't help worrying that it would be nothing like I imagined it or played it out in my head; the worry of not being enough for Dimitri.
Dimitri helped me push away my worries with each touch to my skin.
He helped undo the last buttons and I forced the shirt off, pulling it away from his shoulders. He tugged his undershirt over his head grunting impatiently and tossed it to the floor leaning over me.
He pressed his lips to mine moving my tank top slowly up to get it off. He pulled it over and sighed running is eyes over me, taking in every inch.
I still wasn't used to the way Dimitri looked at me and saw me as if I were one of the world wonders whenever I was in just my bra and shuddered. He held onto me, mistaking my shudder for warmth and to get closer.
The rest of our clothes fell away Dimitri tearing my skirt off impatiently and we lay together under the sheets, Dimitri on top of me covering my body with his, our hair and skin damp from the rain. Before anything happened, before we were really together, Dimitri pushed my hair away from my face running his finger along may scars and looked me directly in the eyes.
"Are you sure about this?"
I didn't realize how hard I was breathing, like I could get enough air, until then and nodded.
"Yes," I answered gathering my voice.
I slowed my breathing and held Dimitri close to me, pulling his face down to mine. I caressed his rough cheek as I had done earlier and he kissed me wherever my skin was exposed. He worked his way on either side of my cheek, my lips and forehead, down my neck and along my skin.
I felt his muscles tense below me whenever I touched him but he kept going kissing me down to my stomach stopping at my waist.
He leaned up, straddling me and clasped my hands with his.
He was waiting for me to tell him that it was okay and that we should keep going.
I nodded, unsure of my voice and we at last became one.
It wasn't what I expected it to be.
It was even better.
I gave Dimitri all of me and he in turn did the same.
I felt all of him completely and I was more than ecstatic.
In certain moments it hurt in a good way, the soreness similar to when someone works out too much.
I was entirely nervous but Dimitri led me along and worked me through it. He motioned and moved perfectly and timely enough and would let me try the same on him in return and after awhile we moved together, sighing in content, moaning in lust and ecstasy.
Our hands touched and held and gripped in everyway possible.
We rolled and tumbled around the bed, tangling the sheets around us.
"Am I hurting you?" Dimitri whispered, meeting my eyes, panting.
"No. The complete opposite," I told him bringing his lips off of mine.
' DPOVWhen we finished, Rose lay across my chest each of us panting our breathing labored, I couldn't help smiling.
Our skin wore a light glitter layer of sweat even in this cold weather; together we were two embers of a fire igniting as one.
Rose let out when long exhale and rested.
I tugged the sheet tighter around her, the comforter falling off of the bed.
I wasn't able to sleep the rest of the night and instead lay awake, watching and listening to the rain outside. Sometimes I'd turn away from the window and just watches Rose as she slept peacefully, and push her hair away from her beautiful face or run my finger along her full lips or along side her curvy shaped figure.
When morning finally came, I had dosed off a little, I awoke without the lightweight of anyone on top of me. I turned over only to meet Rose's back turned, her body shifted completely away from me.
She was awake though.
I ran my finger along her bareback and she tensed, turning over and facing me with a sigh.
"Hi," she whispered, clutching the sheet to her chest.
"What's wrong?" I asked, immediately sensing a change.
I thought last night was perfect but if I had done something that made her feel weird or uncomfortable or I hurt her…
"Nothing," she mumbled, about to roll over again.
I touched her shoulder and kept her from moving.
"Tell me."
She sighed again and kept her eyes down.
"I'm just…I was just worried that you wouldn't…I don't know," she muttered.
"You thought I wouldn't enjoy it?" I asked, surprised. I couldn't resist laughing.
She looked up at me confused and a little hurt. Immediately I felt guilty but still chuckling.
I tugged her to me.
She nodded and hid against my chest.
"Rose, last night was beautiful. At least I thought so." I added.
"I did too…Just couldn't help waking up and thinking that you'd be…disappointed."
I laughed again and kissed the side of her ear.
"You were and still are more than enough for me."
This made her grin.
She snuggled into my neck and wrapped a hand around my waist, kissing the side of my neck.
"I love you."
"I love you too Roza."