AN: Hey everyone! Like I promised, here is the next and final chapter of my first story ever!!!! This chapter actually took me only one day to write and I'm really happy about this chapter and I hope you all are too. Well, enough chatter, here it is. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I'm not Japanese, so please forgive any misuse on the honorifics and I do not own Sailor Moon, which this story is very loosely based.
Chapter 8
Settling the Confusion
Everyone slept in the next morning. They had gotten back late last night and went straight to their rooms, not to emerge till lunchtime. Yuuichirou, however, was wide awake at the crack of dawn. He got very little sleep that night and the sleep he did get was too restless to be called sleep. This was mostly because he kept thinking about a certain girl and what had happened between them during the ball. He turned to his side, still lying on his bed, and looked at his closet where his tux hung. For about the hundredth time, he got up, walked into his closet, picked up his jacket and buried his face in it. It still smelled like her lavender perfume.
Lavender suited her the most. Its color matched perfectly with her eyes and the purplish-black color her hair. If heaven was a garden, it would be filled with lavender flowers.
Yuuichirou was lost in the sea of smells. He stood in his closet for what seemed like forever. Finally, he put the jacket back in its rightful place, afraid he would smell all the perfume out of it, and flopped back on his bed. He lay on his back staring at the ceiling. He thought about the intimate dance they had and smiled to himself. And to think, I almost kissed her, he thought. But then he thought about her pulling away from him when he tried to kiss her. He felt like someone stabbed him in the heart every time he thought about her pulling away. That was the worst kind of rejection he had ever experienced: being rejected by the girl he loved. He knew that she would have probably said no, but he never imagined it would hurt this much. God just kill me now, he thought. He threw his arms over his face, crossing them so they would cover his eyes. And why was she so upset when I told her about my dad giving me the company? His thoughts continued to roam. I should have been upset with her for not kissing me! Why was she so mad? Was it something I said?
"UGH!" Yuuichirou cried, pounding his bed with his fists. "Girls! The only thing they're good for is an ulcer!" He sat up in his bed trying to rid his mind of the questions that haunted him all night. He sad cross-legged, putting his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands, but no matter what he did, he couldn't rid is mind of the girl who had trampled on his heart.
When everyone finally got up, lunch was already set up on the table. Everyone took their seats and began to eat the amazing aromatic feast before them. Hana continued to pester the girls about the ball, asking them what they did and how they like it. They all responded, quite enthusiastically, about the fun they had and how they wished they could go to another, except Rei. She sat quietly next to Usagi, playing with her food, nodding and smiling at the appropriate places.
Usagi noticed Rei's silence and looked up from her food. She looked at her then at Yuuichirou. Across the table, Yuuichirou sat in the same repose. He sat next to Grandpa, who continued to stuff his face as the conversation progressed. He looked exhausted. He sat hunched in his seat, circles clearly visible under his eyes. As Akira and Ami talked about the books in the library, Yuuichirou took just about the biggest yaw she'd ever seen, including her own.
Usagi looked back at her friend and noticed she looked tired as well, though not as tired as Yuuichirou. At first, she thought it had to do with getting back so late and sleeping in, but now the story seemed a little more interesting. She elbowed Rei in the ribs. Rei flinched quite noticeably.
"Ow! What was that for?" Rei cried.
"Rei, is everything alright between you and Yuuichirou?" Usagi whispered so only Rei could hear.
Rei looked over at Yuuichirou then back at her friend.
"Is it my fault Yuuichirou's a slob and an idiot for not getting enough sleep?" Rei retorted, and then began to stuff her face with her uneaten food. Usagi raised her eyebrows at her. She'd heard Rei say some pretty mean things, but she'd never really meant them, and that one was harsh. She looked at the others who also looked at Rei with shock. Thank goodness no one other than the four girls heard her remark.
After lunch, the girls dragged Rei to Usagi's room and sat her down on the bed. The girls all circled her, arms crossed and demanded to know what was wrong.
"Nothing's wrong! I'm fine," She said, standing up to meet everyone at eye level. Makoto grabbed her shoulders and pushed her back down on the bed.
"You're lying," Makoto said.
"You've been this way since your walk with Yuuichirou, and so has Yuuichirou, so obviously something's wrong and it involves both of you," Ami said. Why did she have to be so observant?
"Rei-chan, if you're not gonna tell your best friends, who are you gonna tell?" Minako said.
Usagi sat down next to Rei and put her arm over her shoulder. "Please tell us. We hate seeing you like this," she said. "And we'll try to make it better."
Rei looked at her lap and sighed. She couldn't blame her friends for worrying about her, but she didn't want to talk about her problems. She'd never liked to burden her friends with her worries, but she couldn't help but feel better just from them being concerned about her. She had such good friends and it was moments like this that made her realize it.
"Yuuichirou's father is giving him the company when he retires," Rei said to her lap.
"That's great, Rei-chan!" Minako said smiling. "He'll be just as successful as his father!"
"What's wrong with that?" Makoto asked as Rei slumped even more.
"If he's gonna take over the company, he's gonna leave the shrine and move back here to work. He's not gonna want to be a priest and a businessman at the same time," Rei said almost inaudibly. She still hadn't looked up from her lap.
"Oh Rei, we're so sorry," Minako said sitting on the other side of Rei.
"Is he really leaving?" Minako asked quietly.
Rei looked at her friends, defiance on her face.
"Let that baka leave if he wants to. It's his life. He just wasted a bunch of time trying to be something he's never gonna be." With that Rei stood up and crossed her arms. "I feel bad for Grandpa. Yuuichirou will really let him down if he leaves."
"Rei, you know, this isn't the first time he's tried to leave," Usagi pointed out.
"If you chase after him again he might change his mind like last time," Makoto suggested.
"But last time, Yuuichirou was attacked by a train-like youma and was knocked unconscious and Rei had to nurse him back to health," Minako said.
"That's true. And this time is different," Ami said. "He's being offered a chance to run the company, just like his father. It's his chance to make it in the world as a successful person." She got mean glares form everyone in the room, except Rei, who looked more hurt.
"Ami-chan, way to kill romance," Minako said. "Don't listen to her, Rei-chan. Yuuichirou wouldn't leave you, to the way you fell about him."
"I don't like him!" Rei fumed. She put her hand over her eyes. "Ami is right. He should go. It's a good opportunity for him and he should take it. Why should I stop him from getting everything like this." She indicted the house.
"Because you lo…" Usagi started but was cut off by a hand thrust at her.
"Usagi, don't you dare finish that sentence," Rei said. Usagi looked cast fallen. Rei didn't tell her friends about how she almost kissed Yuuichirou. She didn't want to tell them that was the reason she thought he was leaving. "Look, I'm gonna take a walk. I need some fresh air."
"We'll go with you," Minako offered.
"No, I'd better go alone. I'll see you guys later." She waver her hand and walked to the door.
"Rei-chan, take this." Makoto stopped Rei at the door and handed her an mp3 player. "The songs on there will cheer you up." She smiled reassuringly.
"Thanks, Mako-chan." She stuffed it in her jeans and left.
Rei walked aimlessly around the gardens for an hour. She thought the clear skies and fresh air would clear her head, but it didn't. If anything, it made it worse. The flowers that normally held her interests lost their appeal, the usual wildlife gone for the winter. The lack of distractions left her mind free to wonder. And it did wonder; to the subject she did not want to think about.
I can't believe I almost kissed that idiot, Rei thought. She replayed what happened in her mind and shook her head to shake the image out. She asked herself for about the billionth time since then if her rejection was the reason he was leaving, which was then followed by her telling herself that she didn't like Yuuichirou. But still, the shrine would be so empty without him. She got accustomed to his awful singing during chores, his normal goofiness, the way he'd be the last person to see her off to school and be the first person to welcome her back. And the shrine had been doing so well since he came. He was able to fix things Rei was unable to do, like retiling the roof and cutting firewood. And he was such a good charms seller. Girls flocked the shrine to buy charms form him and he'd be more than happy to help them. She shook her head again. Who in their right mind would choose selling charms to teenage girls and living in a shrine over selling computers all over the world and living in a mansion? Rei asked herself. He's not that stupid.
Rei now wandered into Yuuichirou's secret garden. She didn't realize she'd been there till she nearly ran into the swing. She sat down on it and looked up at the branch that supported her weight. She still marveled at how Yuuichirou had made this at such a young age as well as the gazebo. He'd always been a handy-man at the shrine, but he'd never built anything as creative as a gazebo in the shrine. He mostly just fixed things, like the sink or bells. He'd make a good husband, Rei thought absently. Whoa, where did that come from? She was shocked with herself. She pretended like she didn't just think that and started to swing herself. Maybe when he's all successful, he'll marry a super successful girl. She began to swing higher. Maybe he'll marry that girl from the ball who was studying to be a doctor. What was her name again? She thought of the elegant blonde girl in the teal dress dancing so happily with Yuuichirou. She dug her heels into the ground, skidding to an abrupt halt. Ugh, what a ho. She knew she didn't have a right to say something so mean, but the thought of them getting married left her a little bitter. Then again, why did she care if that baka married the blonde girl? He could marry the queen of England for all she cared.
I need something to cheer me up, Rei thought. She remembered Makoto giving lending her mp3 to her and she fished it out of her jeans. She put the headphones in her ears and pushed the play button. She was soon lost in loud, but not deafening, sounds of the popular songs that flooded the radio. Some of the sons were outright crazy, songs only Makoto would find interesting, but others had the catchiest beats that she couldn't help dance along. All worries and concerns evaporated as she listened to Makoto's songs.
The next song that came up was a song Minako had introduced to them. It was by an American country singer that everyone instantly fell in love with. It soon became one of Rei's favorite songs. She started to sing along.
Meanwhile, Yuuichirou was walking to his garden, wanting some alone time and to see his garden one last time before he left. They were leaving early tomorrow morning and this was the last chance he got to see it. He wasn't sure when he'd be back. As he walked, he heard the sound of an angel in the distance. He snuck up behind a tree and saw Rei standing in the middle of the garden, headphones in, singing along to a song he'd heard once before. She was completely absorbed in the song; putting all emotion into the words that Yuuichirou was instantly captivated. He'd heard her sing in the shrine every now and then, but he would always end up getting yelled at for just standing there or being hit by a broom. But here, in his hiding spot behind a tree, he watched her sing.
See the lights, see the party, the ball gowns
I see you make your way through the crowd
And say hello
Little did I know
That you were Romeo, you were throwing pebbles
And my daddy said, "Stay away from Juliet"
And I was crying on the staircase
Begging you, please don't go
And I said
Romeo, take me somewhere we can be alone
I'll be waiting, all there's left to do is run
You'll be the prince and I'll be the princess
It's a love story
Baby, just say yes
If only I could be her Romeo, Yuuichirou thought with a sigh. He laughed as she continued to sing, increasing her energy and passion in the song. She began to dance around, spinning in circles and brushing the flowers with her hand. The song picked up, talking about how much she was in love and that they needed to be together and Yuuichirou secretly wished she was singing to him. She had traveled to the gazebo and now stood looking out over the side, resting her weight on the rail. She continued to sing.
I got tired of waiting
Wondering if you were ever coming around
My faith in you was fading
When I met you on the outskirts of town
And I said
Romeo, save me
I've been feeling so alone
I keep waiting for you, but you never come
Is this in my head
I don't know what to think
He knelt to the ground and pulled out a ring
And said
Marry me, Juliet, you'll never have to be alone
I love you and that's all I really know
I talked to your dad
Go pick out a white dress
It's a love story
Baby, just say yes
Now Yuuichirou really wished she was singing to him. She laughed at herself at the end of the song. She took the headphones out of her ears and turned off the player. The sound of her laugh made his heart melt. He took a deep breath and left the security of the tree.
Makoto was right. The playlist she made really helped cheer her up. She loved singing but she hadn't sung in such a long time. Singing during chores or while taking a shower were different. That was something others did to pass the time. Rei loved singing itself.
She leaned over the rail and picked one of the flowers in the nearby bush. It was a small white flower with a sweet smell. She held it by the stem between her thumb and index finger. She rubbed her fingers, making the flower spin.
"Hey Rei-chan."
Yuuichirou now stood at the entrance of the gazebo, hands in his pockets. Rei screamed and nearly jumped out of her skin. She hadn't heard anyone coming over because she was still humming to herself. She had dropped the flower she held out of freight and it blew away in the wind. She turned around, hand on her chest trying to keep her heart from ripping out.
"You scared the crap out of me!" she screamed, voice shaking form the sudden increase in adrenaline.
"Sorry about that. I didn't know you were so jumpy." Yuuichirou smiled and shrugged his shoulders.
"I'm not jumpy!" She took a deep breath to try to calm herself down. She was still recovering from the mild heart attack Yuuichirou had given her. "How long have you been here?" She started to get nervous. God, did he hear me singing?
"Not long," Yuuichirou said with another shrug. Then he looked at her with a grin that made Rei scared. "But I was here long enough to see your little performance. I loved it by the way."
Rei's face turned the deepest shade of red Yuuichirou had ever seen. He could almost feel the heat coming from her. She covered her face with her hands and groaned. Yuuichirou chuckled.
"It was great, Rei-chan! Really!" Yuuichirou put his hands on her shoulders. "You have an amazing voice." She looked up at Yuuichirou smiling down at her.
"Thank you, but you shouldn't just sneak up on a people and watch them. That's creepy." She shrugged his hands off her shoulder and took a step back. She started to feel her face turn form red with embarrassment to red from anger.
"I didn't sneak up on you," Yuuichirou said defensively. He knew that tone of voice and knew where this conversation was headed. "I came out here to clear my head and I just so happen to see you singing and dancing in the flowers."
Rei turned around in embarrassment. Great, she thought. I finally stopped thinking about Yuuichirou and here he is, making fun of me for doing something stupid. She thought about what she had just done and she could barely believe she did it. She didn't want to stay here with him. She knew if she did, she would get angry at him again.
"I'm gonna go pack my stuff," Rei mumbled, turning towards the exit, which Yuuichirou was blocking.
"Don't go." Yuuichirou held out his hand to stop her. This was perfect actually. He'd been meaning to ask her all day what was bothering her. His constant worries were eating away at his brain, but he'd never been able to find her until now. He needed an answer from her if he wanted to keep his sanity. She stepped in front of him, her face turning back to its normal color. "I wanted to apologize for trying to kiss you last night," he said looking at the ground. "I shouldn't have done it and I'm sorry if I embarrassed you.
Rei hesitated for a moment. "Apology accepted," she said. Don't get mad, don't get mad, don't get mad, she told herself.
"Really?" Yuuichirou's head snapped back up to look at her.
"Yeah." She wasn't even looking at him. Yuuichirou furrowed his eyebrows. Don't get mad!
"Well if you accept my apology, why are you still mad?" Yuuichirou was thoroughly confused. He was almost positive that this was the reason she was so angry and he thought for sure that if he apologized, things would go back to normal.
"I'm not mad." She still didn't look at him.
"Yes you are. I've known you for years and I know when you're lying."
Don't get mad, don't get…. Dammit!
"Are you seriously asking me why I'm mad?" Rei started. She tried so hard to control her temper, but she couldn't beat it. "As if you don't already know! But why does it matter anyway? It's not like you're going to be around in the near future so why do you care?" She tried to get around Yuuichirou without looking at him because she knew she'd punch him right in the face.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" He grabbed her arm and stopped her. "What are you talking about? What do you mean I'm not going to be around anymore?" He let her go. " Are… are you telling me to leave?" She must be madder than I thought about the kiss, he thought. He was really starting to worry.
"If you want to leave, then by all means!" She threw her hands up in the air. "Do whatever you want, it's your life! Go be the president and run your dad's big fancy company and marry Akiko for all I care!" Once Rei started yelling, there was no stopping her.
"What? Run what? Marry who?" Yuuichirou stuttered. He ran his hand through his short hair. "Rei-chan, could you please tell me what the hell you are talking about. I don't think I'm on the same page as you. In fact, I think I'm reading a completely different book." Yuuichirou was so confused. Of all the people in the world, he had to go and fall in love with the craziest one of them all. What I'd give to have an instruction book for her, he thought.
"You going off and running the company after your father. I'm glad that you've reconciled your differences with him and all, I really am, but if you were just going to end up taking it over, why even bother trying to be a priest all these years? I mean, it was all a waste of time! You strung us all along this lie and then you just bail! Think about what you're doing to Grandpa! You're the first apprentice he's had in years and you're just going to leave him. You owe him better than that after all this time." Rei looked at him right in the eyes now and held firm. "I didn't think you were capable of doing this to us, but I was wrong." Rei tried again to get past Yuuichirou, but he stepping in front of her again, grabbing her by her arms and standing her in front of him.
"Who says I'm leaving?" He let her go. "I never said I was leaving." He looked down at the ground. "Rei-chan, if this is some elaborate attempt to try to get me to leave, you can stop right now. Just tell me outright that you want me to leave and I will." He was still a bit confused about what Rei was talking about. He still thought she was mad about the kiss and that this was her way of telling him to get lost.
"Like I said, do whatever you want. It's your life," she said in the most serious tone.
"Ugh!" Yuuichirou yelled. He put his hands on his head and nearly pulled his hair out. Thank goodness it was so short, otherwise he probably would have. "Just tell me how you feel! Sometimes you can be so cold! If you want me to leave, I will, if it will make you happy. And I am not running the business! Where the hell did you get that?"
"You told me that last night!" she yelled defensively.
"I never said I was gonna run the entire circus! I'm just gonna own it! And I'm sure as hell not leaving!"
"That doesn't make ANY sense!" The two were still screaming at each other.
Yuuichirou took a deep breath to calm down. "My dad gave me a choice: own it and get a piece of the revenue or control it and get an even bigger cut. I chose to own it. I didn't want either, I wanted things to stay the way they already were, but I had to choose to make my dad happy. The earnings I'll get will be enough to take care of the shrine when I become a priest. It will be enough to take care of you, so I was happy to take it. But now, it looks like you don't want me there anymore."
Rei stared open-mouthed at Yuuichirou. So he's not leaving after all? She thought about their conversion and realized how insane she must have sounded. She felt like such a jerk. She shouldn't have jumped to such crazy conclusions. It wasn't like her to lose her head like that.
"I'm sorry I yelled at you," Rei said with a softer tone.
"Does that mean you want me to stay?" Yuuichirou asked, hope dripping from every word.
She didn't answer. She wouldn't even look at him. She was scared to answer truthfully.
"Just to let you know," Yuuichirou said, "if you were to tell me you wanted me to stay, I would never leave. I'd stay forever and never abandon you."
That statement stabbed her in the heart. Tears filled her eyes, but she refused to let them spill over. She'd been abandoned before by her own father. He dumped her with Grandpa as soon as she was old enough and she hadn't seen or talked to him much since then. She'd never really forgiven him, even though she knew her life was a thousand times better than it would be with if she was still with him. She'd stayed distant from boys because if she was abandoned a second time, she knew she wouldn't be able to take it. And here Yuuichirou was, giving her false hope.
He sensed her distress and moved closer to her, putting his hands on her arms. "You know, it's usually the guys who don't talk about their feelings," Yuuichirou teased. "But I don't have a problem talking about mine. I want to stay with you. I want to be with you. I'd give up everything to be with you. I already have." He looked at her with every ounce of his love pouring out of his eyes.
She looked back at him at an utter loss of words. Her mind went completely blank. He took another step and closed the gap between them, his hands still on her arms. He searched her eyes for any kind of answer, but only found himself mesmerized by them. He noticed her slightly pink cheeks and wondered for a spit second if it was from the cold or from something else. For the second time, he felt the urge to kiss her, even though she rejected him the first time. He leaned in slowly, getting closer to her lips. Rei's heart beat increased dramatically. He was now inches from her lips when he paused for a moment. This was exactly the position they were in last time before she pulled away. After a moment of hesitation, mainly because he was afraid she'd pull away again; Yuuichirou closed the gap between them and brushed her lips with his in the gentlest kiss.
He pulled back and looked at her. When she didn't say anything, he dropped his hands from her arms and looked down, completely dejected. She didn't have to say anything for him to know she didn't want him. He started to turn around and leave forever when a hand grabbed his arm.
"I want you to stay," Rei whispered. She was still scared about getting hurt and talking about her feelings, but she realized when Yuuichirou kissed her that it would hurt more to have never tried falling in love at all. She stepped closer to him and put her hands on his broad shoulders. She got on her tip toes and returned his kiss.
Yuuichirou couldn't describe the happiness that coursed though his veins. He wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her with so much passion that he had to tighten his grip around her so she wouldn't fall backwards. Rei wrapped her arms around his neck and welcomed the sweet intrusion in her mouth. She let herself be washed away in the most passionate kiss she'd ever had. Yuuichirou was in heaven and was afraid that if he let her go, it would all vanish.
After a moment that seemed like forever, they finally broke their kiss, breathing deeply, but didn't let each other go. Yuuichirou rested his forehead on hers, noses touching, and eyes closed.
"I guess that means you want to be with me too," Yuuichirou said huskily, smiling at the girl who held his heart.
"Good guess," she smiled back.
AN: Thank you all for reading!!! Please review!!!! I want to know what you all thought. Any comments welcome, even some mean ones, although not as welcome. I want to know what you guys liked so that I know what to write about in my other stories. (In case anyone was wondering, the song Rei sings is Love Story by Taylor Swift.) I just wanted to thank kaleidoscope moon for reading and editing all my chapters. I'll be co-writing a story with her in the future, so that will be exciting! I'm off to work on another story!