T'Pring, 12 Years ago
Vulcan children are most illogic, when the Plak flows, their minds stop.
T'Pring does find love. She hides it so well even she does not realize it till that dark day when Vulcan becomes Vulcan-That-Was. She loves most illogically, a place. The place where her father is not. She wants to be there forever.
The tension between her and father could explode into a reaction. She does not like to think about her ingratitude. Soren is a master of meditation and has given her great gifts. But there is a tension between them. Being the only daughter, being the one that resembles her dead mother, maybe even masked by something Spock could call jealousy. Who knows about such things which have no name or shape. They are as the wind, insubstantial, forceful and quick to pass. But the mothers are there as they are for all Vulcan, to coddle and protect the heir of their hopes from rough usage by a cold father.
The mothers are always there: The priestess that pulls thee from the womb. The teacher who trains your mind arts and body arts, the politicians and scientists that control the meritocracy, until that last day, the Priestess places your katra in the arc. A man's influence can only be for one lifetime.
When she is ready for woman's rites T'Lar was supposed take her in and introduce her to the ways of the Gods. T'Lar is the Eldest Mother and wisest of the Family. She rules Vulcan in some ways. She holds more power in the spirituality than even T'Pau. T'Lar is exact in her expectation and the family must follow. Her foremother's words are clear, She has telepathic mind training but her education in worldly affairs is insufficient and will not serve her. It will be corrected.
T'Pring learned nothing of the ologies before then. These Elegant sciences. In place as remote and austere as this monastery, there is no place for a child who acts like a child. Everyone in Dhikune had left the world to be free of it. They did not concern themselves with study of Science only meditation and freedom from Emotions. Adults learned the mind arts and suus mahna forms to clear their minds. Her elder brother taught her geometry from a paper book a few times a week. Her fore-aunt taught her of Surak and of the gods who were long dead, the things you must know as illogical and false, and will not help achieve Aiemansu, passion's mastery. She learned a little algebra and drawing when she was not meditating or in a trance or in a fast. She does not know of biology which holds her mind together or populates Vulcan with fascinating animals (Though she can strangle a tresh-kah with a rope and avoid le-mataya.) She does not know of geology and hydrology (Though she can find water at the root of a Love Tree) She does not know the names of the continents on Andoria. Or when the Romulan war ended. She named the wrong United Federation President (he was a human so she did not know, but T'Pau was head of the Vulcans who ruled T'Pring.) She does not know the difference between Kythara and ryll*. She once wished to play a pretty instrument but it was not logical to one seeking Kohlinar. She has a fine hand, but cannot type a simple data string into a console. She can't even use a keyboard, only learning calligraphy. She also knows a sleeper hold that will detach a man's spinal chord from his brain and knows five presure points to kill a man.
T'Pau and T'Lar said T'Pring must go from her home to learn other ways. They called them "advanced deportment lessons" at the T'pileh Ladies Conservatory in the city. It is a boarding school. Priestess T'Zaia does not protest, but her honored Foremother has never been one to care about anything. What could you expect of a Kohlinaru priestess? T'Zaia is T'Pring's hero, her marvelous Kohlinar mind clear and without pretension or worry. One day this T'Pring may be T'sai and she will be an Aduna in Surak's clan. Maybe even a Matriarch. She must educate herself. The Conservatory is where she learns the graces of city life. She has lived in austerity since age 16. She is allowed to keep her long marriage braid, though it is not in keeping with the dress code.
There are many things about The Ladies Conservatory that are different that are preferable. T'Lar wishes her to know that such places exist. Unlike home there are the greatest scholars in the known galaxy. There are scholars who study the stars and the bugs and the dirt and anything that there is, no study is forbidden. There is no book that is deemed illogical, no need to censure. There were so many data files that she will never be able to read them all anyway. There are computers where you could find out what happened yesterday on Earth or what happened a week ago on Deep Space 2.
She has her own room without her brothers, and a blanket and mattress and a chair that were hers, a room that keeps the sand out in a storm, which piles against the clear plastic window. She has four clean uniforms. There is an indoor refresher for windy days and the sand pit is huge and closed in. Her water quota is more then she can drink, and she foolishly embarrassed herself nearly a drinking a whole days water in ten minutes just because she could and was incredulous. There is more food then she can eat, and her belly is not something she has to ignore in pain control meditation. In fact there is a regularity and schedule for eating. At school, there is regularity in socializing and talking and reading and even for music, because they even learn the things that do not have any practical value, merely logic of stimulating the mind.
And there are glittering cool halls, with blackboards and white boards, where mathematics covers the walls. There has never been a Vulcan no mater how small or poor or diminished that cannot see the beauty of an equation, and how a powerful astrologer, or arithmancer or Master of Elegance can pare it down into purest simplicity. They let her go to the great black board and untangle some problem till her mind tingles with energy and comprehension, unfettered by confusion or low frustrations.
Mathematics is a respite of all Vulcans, to relieve the stress of co-existing with other grim animals, and stupid aliens, and above all Vulcans who are stupid and cruel and must be silent or reveal it. The numbers are perfect units of reality. The click of chalk. The scrape of the soft eraser. There is a goodness in the world that is a part of its logic, not to be avoided.
Her schoolmate, T'van was her constant companion. T'van is from the city and a fine student who helps her with ologies. T'van is a very different person. She is only competent at telepathic arts, and is terrible at Suus Mahna. There are those who would call the girl shallow and unconcerned of the inner world. She is just over-stimulated, with so many things to discover and master she forgets to slow down and think about the nature of the mind. T'van does not really have much to say of importance but talks a lot. T'Pring lets her. T'van likes to have a friend who lets her talk as much as she wants.
They are walking through the town on some errand. Somehow T'van with her confident, even boisterous ways, convinced her to go shopping even if they had nothing of importance to do there. This day they were going to buy a new hair clip because it snapped in her calisthenics (Suus Mann). This was not a necessity but T'van made it seem vital. She emphatically indicated the new clip must be graj ash wood because it provided thirty seven benefits over that of a plain plastic clip, which she enumerated to anyone who would listen. They called many of the girls to come along as well, though T'van would be the only one who needed anything. The whole crowd of them going to buy one hairclip, was a foolish idea, though it seemed logically sound at the time. They were thinking of their long soft braids walking down the city streets as the time sounded for 1500 hours, T'van returned to the topic of their intended bondmates. She spent many of her free hours discussing him.
"This is my Sojick." T'van showed off the Cameo with his visage etched in glass. "We are waiting until I get my appointment at the Academy to have children. He and my mother are growing quite close. But Mother is insistent that every pon farr a proper lady should have a child. Proper heirs. T'Same."
She says "This is Shoras. He is working for the terraforming project on Drouchit 6, he will be returning to Vulcan after that. With a Doctorate, maybe then he can get into the Institute of Technology. That will surely be in his favor should he apply for the Science Academy this year." T'Same shows the image of her intended.
"Show your's Tiola," T'van said.
"If you insist T'van-love." Tiola was shy. She was short, with short hair under her modest little hair cover looking terribly androgyne and urbane. On average, Tiola says less then T'Pring, but out of timidity. She has a picture of a man etched in glass. "This is Stonn. He is from Shikar originally. His lands are extensive up north. He is studying to be an Agricultural Engineer. He has a capability to make unusual fruits and vegetables thrive in harsh conditions. This excess of pride in his abilities as a gardener is his only vice. I see why he married a woman with less land then himself as he is only a passable scholar. His brothers are great scholars whose theoretical breakthroughs in Replicator Technology bring pride to the house of Sapaun. Maybe our children will take after them. But he will have his father's lands when the old man dies."
The girls are protective of their bondmates, interested in the boys' affairs, even fascinated by them. They are curious about their future lives together. No one really worries. The lower households and wights usually married among themselves and, as long as the DNA profile is clean, don't mind little things like fraternization and mind touch, and even mind meld. Vulcans are not known to fornicate so young.
Tiola will marry well above her station. She was a progressive in nature and had contrasting political opinions with many of the teachers and politicians of the day. She needs a wealthy husband to take her to a more metropolitan area then Tpileh City, of more varying opinions. Stonn was the son of Sapaun, was the son of T'Pau as good as family.
"His family has status. Will you take pride in being a famous wife?" T'Same asked.
"I do not believe so," Tiola said. "Auntie said I should break the bond. When 11, he got into a violent fight and told a lie, but I don't believe that. Stonn is very shy. He lives in Tpileh now. He goes to the Boy's Academy. My uncle chaperones us, but he is not vigilant at his task. His mind is very nice. I would know if he were really a violent boy or if he was a liar."
Such secrets are not kept totally silent among the Vulcan mothers. It was true. Stonn and Spock fought violently when they both attended Shikar Academy. Many of the boys fought violently with Spock. Many of the boys were expelled, for lying and violent conduct. The Proctor said he would only let Spock back into the school, for he did not lie though his misdeed was great.
The Proctor was a very logical man, explaining his decision well. One did not provoke unusual creatures because they might become violent. You can't expect a Qomi to do anything correctly as a Vulcan would and they would have to accommodate him. This caused Spock to feel an upset that he never told her about. Possibly one of the worst he ever had even when he was out of school for several days with the Argosian pox. T'Pring thought he was injured because he experienced a pain so intensely powerful, through their betrothal link. Spock left that school after a year though he was not expelled.
Males could be quite violent and aggressive before their first pon farr. She had seen her brothers wrestle and do what was not brotherly.
"My Sojick is an astrogator. He is compelled to travel and will settle no where for even a moment." T'van blinked "I will probably just let him move to Earth or Argeelius or wherever Astrogators get work and I remain on T'khasi, in Vulcan." T'van looked to T'Pring, "And your's T'Pring? Show us the image your intended gave to you."
T'Pring straightens her shopping bag "No."
"T'Pring it is not equitable for you to keep a secret when we your sisters are here sharing." T'Same said.
"My intended gave me no remembrance." T'Pring said. "He gave me this."
She held the comm unit. It is light and she can walk around with it and believe he gave it to her. He had the deportment of a wild animal. Is that what humans did? Talk? Gabble about irrelevant things. She tries not to let it perturb her study group.
"Why does he not call you on the Computer at School?"
Tiola nodded "If he gabbles or is spontaneous I can deal with."
"Oh my. I think he wishes you to speak with him. And lull him with your voice like the Demon Maiden Hu'a." T'van said "That is most… strange."
"He says it is illogical we should not gabble at each other a few hours a night." T'Pring shook her head. "He does not have permission of my father. My Father accused him of immodest intimacy. He must ask my father before he calls me."
"Oh. Well." The girls were Vulcan and did not say what their imaginations conjured.
"He always wants to talk." T'Pring said "Well his father is to blame for that. Sarek is the most garrulous of all the Vulcan's who ever lived. A public servant. An Advocate for criminals. And now he spends all his time on other planets losing his manners."
"Your intended is T'sai Amanda's only son. The Young Spock? All the way in Shikar?" T'Same says with something that mimicks disbelief.
Tiola knew more about Shikar society "He has the Qomi mother." Tiola said. "He is known. I heard he saved a Klingon boy from throwing himself off the top of Ry-myr Tash Skyscraper."
"I heard he is friends with the new Kai of Bajor."
"I heard he assisted his father when those Betazed women came to Vulcan."
T'Same looked around "According to the rankings he is the first of 27 fields of study. A record that is officially unmatched." "You have such …clever intended. I would speak of him constantly. I did not know his parents had arranged him a Vulcan marriage." She had interest coloring her voice. "I heard that he will be appointed to The Science Academy. The board is relaxing the admissions standards and said he did not have to submit his DNA profile."
"That is hard to believe. How did he get away with that?" T'van said "All applicants must submit a DNA profile before admission."
"They couldn't. Nearly a margin of thirty percent to 35.8 of his DNA is human. They would have to throw his application out," Tiola said.
"He could not get a job as a food server in the academy commissary if he was forced to reveal himself." T'van said with too much humor. She had tirelessly endeavored to get an appointment to the VSA. She had hoped to raise her family's honor doing thus, and have her clan gain influence in Vulcan Society. "I would honor his superlative achievement but I still do not understand how he got away with a breach of protocol."
"It is logical that they make a decision on the application, based on all the information they can." T'Pring said "On the health and background of the applicant."
"They just wanted a way to cheat the Federation, and look at a scholars parentage and the purity of their blood lines. DNA is euphemism for Family Pedigree," Tiola said. "Not to mention they ask for things like political affiliation, religion, marital status on the application as well. What do these personal things matter to the scientist or his work? It is prejudicial. I think it a social injustice"
"That cannot be proven or disproven." T'Pring said. "As we are not privy to the application process."
"How is it logical when we respond to only their tests and only their questions? Such practices were used in the Science Directorate, holding back our technological progress for years even a centuries if we can remember modern history. Look how corrupt they became. Is it a coincidence that those of the highest families and purest bloodlines always receive appointments, sometimes regardless of educational status or experience in the field?"
"By it's definition yes. It is a coincidence As we cannot prove your theories." T'Pring said. The other girls knew her logic was correct.
"Maybe they will forgo the DNA profile all together now, if they have Half-Qomi's as professors. And Betazed as students. Maybe they will join our modern times. Where the mind is the only judge of a person. The quality of his observations and the things he discovers. Or She or it. Judge by the mind alone." Tiola gestured.
"It will be hard to attain an appointment with Schann Spock T'gai as competition." T'van said.
"What is this Spock that everyone talks about him?" Her friends were curious. "Who is this creature that will marry our T'Pring?"
"He is an interesting being. He is not deformed with an extra eye or arm or no ears. Or tentacles or excreting mandibles…" T'Pring commented.
"Is Spock handsome?"
"Handsome is a subjective term and has variable meaning." T'Pring said. "I see him less frequently since my father caught our go-between. He supplants that need with talking."
T'Same thinks deeply. Her plots are deep, she would be a good Cardassian whose long lived revenge plots last generations. She holds up her heavy plotting head which is tired from proper ladylike posture. "Perhaps Spock likes to speak with you so much because he means to cohabitate before his Time. His father would have to be liberal, Marrying Qomi. Many of the Shikari cohabitate now. You and he might live together and become accustomed to each other before His Time."
T'Pring protests "Father would not agree. It is not the custom of Dhikune to cohabitate before marriage. It has been so from before the time of the Awakening. Some only meet twice before marriage. My father assailed Spock's pimp. He does not know I have Spock's communication device. He would become angry."
Tiola said "You had best become accustomed to their values as well, T'Pring. You are going to be Shikari too. And you will have to live there if you and Spock live in the same house."
"Explain."
Tiola was a quiet girl even for a Vulcan whose ears heard more then others. So when she spoke T'Pring always listened. "The Prime Minister of Tpileh says Hybrids are illogical abominations, who are prohibited legal residence or immigration cards. There was a protesting honaya last week on campus. The rival sides were all but shouting at each other. Spock will not wish to break the law and come to Tpileh illegally."
T'Pring had not thought about where they would live. She had not thought that the political unrest fomented by the new elections in the conservative party would effect her, being a conservative Vulcan of no note. But even if there were no problems in Tpileh there could be difficulties.
"When you will have offspring, they will be half Shikari half Tpileh." T'van looked scandalized "They will be like bastards of no home. Not knowing what is the right way."
"I doubt she is worried about something so inane. That is a small matter as their children will be only three quarters Vulcan. They will not be allowed to live here if the conservatives are re-elected. There is a chance they will not be allowed to even get a travel card to go on a visit, if political matters come to a head."
T'Pring should have felt cold meat in her belly, but she was a student of Kohlinar.
"If there is any decision, there will be many Tpileh that will wish to make honaya and protest and state the illogic of a decision. To leave the Hybrids alone. Then you and Spock will be free to do anything, as is Logical and Right."
T'Pring never really thought about such matters. She would not break the trend.
"I have become accustomed to life at the Conservatory. I do not think it is logical I should go. My place should be here. Perhaps if I tell Spock that it would make me unhappy, he will not press me to do so. He is a very accommodating man. As is fit a true gentleman."
"What about your Foremothers?"
"They are not gentlemen." T'Pring said.
When she arrived back at her room, she heard a noise in her room. She worried an annoying pest flew in her door. It was a different pest then she expected. It was Tsiao'ge was sitting on her computer desk and her equally rude little friend K'sel was flicking her monitor on and off. The two little ones never left her in peace with their silly questions.
"T'Pring why did you not invite us to go shopping?" Tsiao'ge asked "What did you buy?"
"Nothing it was T'van who bought things. Leave my room. I wish to be alone with my companions" T'Pring said.
"We wished to come with you T'Pring," Tsiao'ge said. "Aren't we companions too?"
"No. You cannot go unescorted in the city. You are children and we are juveniles. And not my companions."
"That is why we wanted to go with you T'Pring." Tsiao'ge said. K'sel was not saying anything flicking around T'Pring's private desktop.
"K'sel you will break it." T'Pring was not amused. These little girls were exasperating. The other girls in T'Pring's class were hiding amusement as Tsiao'ge kept asking curious questions. Tsiao'ge had adopted T'Pring for her idol and role model, though T'Pring did not wish it.
It was only then when her room was full of strangers that fate decided Spock should make a call over the computer. She has not seen his face for 2.9 years.
The screen revealed the appearance of Spock's stern face. Handsome with encroaching manhood, his cheeks hollowed with strength instead of plump and gentle. He looked into the camera.
"I will speak to my intended alone. Everyone go."
The girls all crowd around slowly to get a look at the screen. They rubber neck and twisted their heads to see who this young man is. To get a good look at his face without interrupting T'Pring.
They are surprised to see this spokc, his thin brows and his long eye lashes. His face so Vulcan and elegantly symmetrical.
"You are an attractive male." K'sel tells Spock.
There was a silence and an audible gasp. The girls look at K'sel.
His speech breaking and squeaking. "Excuse me? I have misheard you." Spock was disoriented by her complement. His face changing to an embarrassed green as he notes all the girls staring at him.
"You are very beautiful. You don't look like an alien."
She races away before he can chastise her lack of manners. The girls stare for a minute. No one expected the little girl to say that. They stood quietly. As Quickly as the Qomi turned red, he turned a smoky green. He could not control the small capillaries in his cheeks. It was unusually ill-mannered.
Shikari are notorious for their body hating and austere comportment. They might have even caused less offence if she had used some insult instead of calling him attractive. Spock did not believe she said such a rude thing out loud. Such a thing to arouse a reaction out of him. For a people known for their blunt honesty even that was over the line.
Spock looked away from the camera panicking and fumbling for the screen. "I will call her later. I cannot talk right now with all these strangers." She did not know he blushed so quickly.
The second Spock disconnected, the other little girls pounced on T'Pring and gave their irrelevant commentary. They acted like Qomi and surrounded her shouting.
"He is most handsome. If I had a image of Spock I would stare at it for dazed and be too amazed and emotional for my studies," K'sel said
"I have seen Spock's likeness on the feeds, and traveling with his father on that mission to Bajor. But never up close. He has Northman's looks." T'Same said.
"He is most aesthetically suitable. Exotic. His eyes are red-brown, not hazel." Tiola contributed "An unusual skin tone as well."
"He has pink lips not brown. His lips are so wet. He makes water in his mouth too?" T'van asked eyes danced with young to understand what she was saying.
"How do you not stare at his unnatural eyes when you talk to him? They seem hypnotic. Does he try to mesmerize you?" Tsiao'ge squeezed her hands around her headscarf in nervous suppression.
"All of you will be silent." T'Pring said forcefully "You have no right to say things which induce such an intense emotional reaction in him. So what if he is handsome? So what if he is an alien. You should not say such things. You will all leave my room. You have shamed him and yourselves. You will not shame me."
"We just wanted to see what an alien looks like." Tsiao'ge said. But it was true for all of then "It is true, he is good looking. I admire him for it."
"T'Pring they are girls. You must not have a reaction of your own." T'Same said. "You seem angry." T'Same grabbed K'sel her sister by the hood of her school robe, "Come you two. Do not bother T'Pring or Spock. They will scream at you like a mental defective."
T'Pring grumbled wishing that she could bodily discourage them to ever enter her rooms without permission. She wished the headmaster would allow her a lock on her chambers. Or she could kick Tsiao'ge in the posterior. But T'Pring's rating in suus mahna, kareel-ifla was too high to be allowed to fight anyone. She had been studying martial art much longer then the city girls, who were all very thin and soft. So they would have to arrest her even for striking a classmate.
T'Same got the little girls to leave, pushing shoving in very un-lady like means. The Proctors would be angered that a small matter had blossomed into a fit of emotionalism, perhaps they would not allow Spock to call ever again. He was embarrassed and even she could not believe the lack of comportment the little ones showed. She should have every right to scream at them and tell them of her negative emotions. They had intruded in a very private matter of hers and Spock's, as well.
T'Pring dismissed everyone from her room for their atrocious behavior.
She returned to her blue meditation rug and began to meditate her stress away. She did not know something so irrelevant as a handsome boy could cause such a torrent of emotions. Her lack of control was shameful and weak. She must not let her anxieties effect her meditation. Hours later she was not calmed, but had only had her meditation ruined by thoughts.
Unless Spock's academic career took him abroad to other planets (which was unthinkable), he would want to stay in the capital with his mother (humans were very needy of their children). He might need to visit Earth from time to time. Would he expect her to leave her home to visit such a place too?
She might have to move to Gol when she was an adept, but not before having a child. No Kohlinar adept could apply if she had a small child. T'Zaia made this "no mothers allowed" rule and had not made one exception in 138.8 years, since she had been Grand Master and High Priestess of Gol. T'Zaia lived nearby Soren. T'Pring had seen T'Saia several times a year. Soren knew his mother was a good influence and exemplar of Vulcan virtures.
It was T'Lar, her dead mother's mother who would make the decision where she lived. Not Spock and not herself. T'lar made it clear that she wished T'Pring to take her womanhood rites at Seleya to begin her training for the Priesthood. T'Pring, as she got older, wondered if this would be something like a good thing. Or if she like her father would not wish to live by T'Lar's decisions either. He never listened to her
But would she like Shikari life? Would she have to endure the chaotic presence of Spock's mother? Would she be a central figure in these reports of note? Would she be saving people off sky scrapers and going to all kinds of strange places she never heard of before? Would she be risking her life illogically? Maybe Seleya would be as agreeable as Tpileh. Maybe she would even like the excitement of Shikar.
T'Pring would not give up Tpileh. Or would she be forced to leave when her schooling was complete. She had found this place the most suitable for her. Dhikune was bereft, and Gol somehow made her feel as small and weak as a nursling. Everything with T'Lar and her father and Spock was most complicated and confusing. A difficulty that could not be picked apart with careful thoughts. They were not numbers. Lady T'Zaia was so wise and careful to overcome such things, could she?
T'van and Tiola arrived at her door. "Are you talking to Spock?"
"No he has not called back. I think he fears embarrassment if he should call again." T'Pring said, "It would have been agreeable to speak with him with my father's permission."
She could forgive these two. It was not their fault those little girls had treated Spock like that.
"We wish to apologize to Spock for making him have a feeling." Tiola said.
"We should have told K'sel of her misspeaking and chastised her behavior.
"You did not make him have a feeling. He should be stronger. K'sel was foolish. He was weak. Come in and sit and I will share fresh water."
T'van and Tiola took their places on the soft cushions on T'Pring's floor. T'van let her comportment ooze into the cushion and laid down on her elbow. They lounged like wives in some Pre-Surakki harem, discussing many interpersonal relationships and philosophical matters of the day. T'Pring never had female associates, and had a brief un-Vulcan-like hope they would be friends.
"I do not know why you do not wish to converse about your bondmate, T'Pring." Tiola shook her head. "You are fortunate your parents have found you a mate like him. He is such a man. Do not be timid."
"He is more then a sufficient mate. I thought Shikari gentleman abhorred excess of beauty. Satisfactory is the highest compliment." T'van almost spoke heretically, purposefully misquoting Surak's words. "Must be human excess." she said.
"Humans are an excessive child race." T'Pring said.
"He barely looks like an alien." T'van said.
"He is no alien. He is Vulcan." Tiola said
"In part, he is a Vulcan. His genetic makeup makes him solely unique, for the time being." T'van said.
"In part, he is a human. He lives on Vulcan. follow Vulcan ways…"
T'Pring does not wish to hear such a circular pointless debate, "Would you please desist? I have heard enough about what others think of Spock tonight."
Tiola looked to her. "He could be half Tellarian. Who not only have poor manners but no attractive looks. He is a most intelligent creature as creatures go. The priests do not possess the answers to what he is. Nor the scientists. One day we will know what he is with further ontological and philosophical study, until then, he is your mate."
T'Pring sighed and crossed her legs.
T'van went on and on. "I don't care what he is. It is unequitable match T'Pring. He is aesthetically attractive but T'Pring not his caliber of scholar. Perhaps she will gain attributes that will make her his equal, but now it seems an unsuitable match. We all love T'Pring sure, but this is Spock. He looks like he has all the finest qualities of the Perfect Male. Prudence, Equanimity, Efficiency, Rationality," She put on her new shiny clip "Restraint and the Ability to Mask distasteful emotional states in the presence of Ladies. He would even be Predictable. " She said. "Men are distastefully Spontaneous." Her inexperience created the image of her perfect man. Not that Spock didn't have most of these qualities, except those last three.
"All things logical qualities in a life mate." T'Pring says. T'van is both right and foolish at the same time, which is maddening.
Tiola thought "My perfect husband will have flaws. I do not care how much he talks or if he does not talk at all. He will be morally upright and he will nurse our offspring while I go back to the Musical Conservatory. He and I willwork in furtherance of the house of Sapaun. I will see to his needs even when we are parted. If he loves you and is reliable, What else does a girl need?"
It was notlike Tiola to use such crude terms. As love. Tiola was a strange girl, who said very strange things. At least T'van prevented herself from using such language. But Tiola had simple needs, in both tangible desires and intangible desires. And there was sometimes no other word.
"You have too low expectations Tiola-love. To merely have some flighty thing as love to base your union. You are to be in the Clan of Surak. You can have whatever you want with the immense resources you are accorded. If I were to marry into Surak's clan I would have no need of mine unmet." T'van said. "No one needs emotions."
"I'll bet you would be happy to be affianced to a son of Surak." T'Pring said bitterly.
"If I were an alien yes." T'van said. "I would be very happy to have a wonderful husband."
T'van continued her sermonizing and imaginative discourse, "Men these days are inferior. Why are men so ungentlemanly, spontaneous, irregular, not punctual, with no order? Or they are incomplete of gender, or they are intended to others. The one with brains are manipulative. The other half of them don't even have any brains. Only girls like T'Pring, of high households and famous relatives, get the smartest ones. Her foremother is a Kohlinar Master."
"My paternal, my maternal is at Seleya."
"See. You are as close to the royal lines as they come, since Tsai T'par died of cancer and her son is not spoken of." T'van could have sounded jealous. "You could marry any man you want."
Tiola said "T'Pring has a good bloodline. And bloodlines are vital to the safety of Vulcan. Men cannot carry on the bloodline and are but vessels of the genetic material. If not for T'Pring, Surak's bloodline could be lost."
"Compared to Spock, my Sojik is bold, exciting, cowardly and plain of face. It is an unfavorable comparison," T'van said.
"You sound illogical T'van-love. I am what I am." T'Pring said. "The man who my parents picked for me cannot transform my life."
"I can't help feeling that you are indeed the most fortunate girl in school. I agree with Tiola. Spock is rich, intelligent, a fine student and a exemplar of virtues. What more could you want of a mate then Spock. Four penises?"
"T'van!" Tiola scolds for such crudity.
T'van said "He is a scholar of note at a young age. So he does not take after his human blood at all. He's barely a human at all. He might as well be all Vulcan. I heard his IQ is…"
"You can't tell T'Pring everything. Save something for the marriage intercourse." Tiola said. Her eyes coyily blinking. Even quiet Tiola was mocking her. "Is it not said Humans like surprises which aggravate their passion and stimulate their enjoyment…"
"I am not Human." T'Pring is surprised at the volume in the voice, but her schoolmates are illogical and gabble like birds. And such low terms. Were women she thought worthy to be friends using double entendres?
"Do you have nothing of note to discuss then but my intended?" T'Pring asked in a tight voice.
"Not especially." Tiola shook her head
"Not tonight anyway." T'van lay on the ground.
"It is wrong for a lady to speak of another's mate or intended with lust." T'Pring said.
"I do not-" Tiola protests
"I do." T'van admits and stares right at T'Pring.
They might not be giggling or grooming each other, but young girls have a sort of common vocabulary. Did human girls and Klingons maids have nothing to talk about but their mates as well? Did any female have anything serious to say in the galaxy?
"I know his intelligence. We have had rare intercourse but I have seen his mind." T'Pring said. "At Koon-at-katr-la."
"How much could have changed? People rarely change fromtheir true natures."
T'Pring sat "No one will say anything bad about Spock. Everyone said he is the greatest Vulcan in the world. While in reality he is not all Vulcan. Such superlatives cannot be a reliable accounting of him. What is Spock truly like?"
"Do you think they lie about him, my love?" T'van said. "That they exaggerate his intelligence and exploits."
"No. But they do not say why. Why he does such things? What are his motivations? They must not say everything." T'Pring said "They must be hiding something. I wish I knew him. Not just glimpse at his mind… but know him." T'Pring said "I wish I was able to understand Spock before we are wed."
"I'm sorry. But that is just how men are. Even handsome ones." Tiola said.
"And he will probably rise to Pon Farr every year if unchecked." T'Pring purses her lips.
"T'Pring! First T'van and now you. You do know better. It is not like you to speak crudely." Tiola was shocked. "Are you in PlakTow? To abuse your friends ears with crude language. And to speak ill of thy intended."
"I have read the books. His mother comes to my house." T'Pring had the look of a woman who was driven to surprise finding a moth in her closet.
"Has his mother has given you her families Love texts? My cousin gave me mine."
"Like a vulcan." T'van nodded. "She has adapted many customs of Vulcans. She has been studying or ways." Tiola added.
"Aye. Human love texts. As if they have not the largest collection of digital pornography of any race in the federation. This was not like ours. Dry and Scientific. Sex must not be as much fun as the pornography indicates. I wonder if human women have any pleasure. There must be a reason they are always on heat. To raise a daughter ready to mate at 13 and continually on heat like a sha'ami goat. What sort of world is it? Or have a son who will go after a woman who is not picked by their mother." T'Pring could not bear to think of possible children yet, it induced fear and confusion.
"She's trying to change me to something foul and un-Vulcan. She smiles at me with every tooth and tells of her happiness. And that she wished me happiness and she wished her son happiness. And every word a lie." T'Pring lowered her head "She always hated me. The first time I met her she screamed. She said she did not wish her son to be married."
"She truly screamed?" Tiola clutched her headscarf.
"Outloud a scream." T'van repated. The two girls looked at her transfixed with vicarious excitement. "I have never heard a scream." A human scream was something alien and eldritch, like a ghost or demon.
"Did it hurt your ears?"
"Yes." T'Pring said "I never…" She remembered her Koon-at-katr-la clearly, with eidetic precision. No one had ever been so cruel and angry in her life before that point. Anger disgust and shame was held in check by perfectly serene faces. To see hate on Amanda's face was offensive. "Spock said it was directed at T'pau. That she was not angry at me."
"You should listen to him. He knows his mother. Maybe she does not have hate for you, but for T'pau, as Spock said. Since then she has given you the love text and wished to gain your alliance. And garnering your attention by kindness. Qomi do things such as this."
"What do you know of the Qomi? T'van." T'Pring snorted "I am the only one who ever even met one. If she does not hate me, why does she not apologize for screaming at me? Am I to believe that she, a lady, said things that she did NOT mean?" She snorted. A lady not speaking her mind and being untrue was too foreign for T'Pring to understand. "Amanda is an offensive being to me. No one speaks poorly of her, either." She said "What if such things are true about him?" What if Spock could be like Amanda? And Treat her as Amanda had treated her, and put fear in her. To make her feel such things.
T'Pring was feeling and it was such a burden. She balled her fist. "Happy Happy Happy. I never wish to hear this word. Happiness is for the beast and the Qomi."
"How can being happy make one so miserable?"
After that T'Pring hadn't much to say to her friends about Spock. They sat besides her on her bed and tried to keep her from her strong emotions.
T'pau Now
Stohlen and Sor were strong Vulcans, especially Stohlen, who lifted T'pau to the top of the litter as if she was a small wrinkled purse. She did not prefer this tradition of the attendant riding on a litter of majesty. She would have liked to ride in like a man would, on one of those spirited "hor-ses" or one of those Three eyed elks who inhabited the colony planet. A lesser Vulcan or small child might feel helpless up there. It was not in her nature to let others direct where she went. Especially if it wobbled.
No, T'pau was a logical woman. People of logic try to direct their own fate. When she felt Vulcan had lost it's way in the modern era, she became the student of Syrrian and his closest confidante. When she felt the rule of law of the High Command was unjust, she became a freedom fighter even though she was called a terrorist and framed for Murder. When her intended left her at 16, she did not die, she merely found a new mate. A fine mate, one superior to her first in thirty-seven different ways. Her chosen mate, Koss was handsome, wealthy, of good family and of good blood lines, and no one was using him. There was something very logical about using an untapped resource. He was intended to T'pol the ambassador, but she did not want him and would not challenge. No one ever found out why, but she would not. The results were unpleasant but not irrational.
T'pau could still remember he discourse with T'pol on the matter in a boardroom of the Conclave of Priestess. Both of them in the plaktow, fine ladies of high political office influence swearing like Naussicans and circling each other like angry beasts. Koss was there, bidding them hold onto logic. He might have done it if that whorish Ambassador T'pol called her an adulterer. Obviously the logical solution was to punch T'pol in her stupid stupid face. T'pau, a lifelong practitioner of the killing arts, had never actually hurt someone before. Apparently she was prodigy.
T'pol clutched her bleeding face and grunted in pain. After that the only suitable response was for T'pol a larger woman to try to throttle and shake T'pau by the neck until her head popped off. Women did not often fight on the marriage grounds. Since it was no marriage grounds, no one died. But there was lots of blood, and broken teeth and Ear pulling. The federation officers had to fire their phasers in the air, not realizing it was Pon Farr, thinking it merely anger. The last thing T'pau remembers about that day was T'pol getting stunned by a phase pistol and laughing at her fall. T'Lar put her down with a neck pinch. (Who knew T'Lar could fight as well as she could heal?)
T'pol lost her mate that day and skittered away limping and bleeding missing an incisor. Apparently almost content to take another mate… (in fact knowing her a few other mates.) T'pau had no idea that she harbored such intense feeling of the woman. Only Plaktow could reveal it. They had practiced their fighting several times since but never with that power. Only death could allow T'pau to admit she missed that friend of hers. That impossibly brave and stubborn woman. T'pol should be here too on the new colony. She could teach these children how to get things done.
100 years later, Romulans attacked, the world was sucked into a wormhole and the last time she saw Kos, he tripped while escaping the Katric Arc, probably tripping on his robe or on a errant bootlace. T'pau never saw as Sor threw her over his shoulder and ran. She was angered and so overcome with the force of evil emotions. T'pau even tried to stop Sor from saving her life. Such evil things emotions were. She knew she preferred to be in control. She would have found a way on her own. She would have… She shook her head.
The sight of T'Pring's ceremony takes her away from Uzu-Ahrak and the dark days of the High Command. She remembers the insanity of her own Pon Farr. She was 42. Rapacious mind-eating pon farr, that rattles the life so young. Particularly the violence lust, she was unusual and had it in the earliest stages of Pon Farr. But it was not uncommon for fights, violent and angry to occur at the weddings. The masked ax-man stood there curbing their insane emotions, ready to contain the violence, symbol of their own need for the rituals.
She missed stern T'pol. She missed the gentle T'lar and her unfaling wisdom and goodness. She missed the twice used Kos both brilliant and clueless and her partner in life. They were all gone, T'pol killed her self before the onset of Bendaii at 147, too proud for her own good. T'lar lived in austerity and never… never would have know there was the Battle of Vulcan had ended. She was sucked into the black hole. Kos tripped on his robe and T'pau couldn't do anything.
In such savage days even she, an old woman like her has duties to live on and on despite the risk of sorrow. She even has suitors, who if she rise again would try to impregnate her. Sarek's cousin/uncle, Selek is the worst. Normally he is quiet and lives in Sarek's house, in almost a state of austerity. He will fix hardware, and Sarek informs him of the Newsfeeds, because Selek's eyes are bad even for an old man. When in the colony he does chores in Sarek's house between scribbling on some project, she cannot define . She has not been engaged in the elegant Sciences of Vulcan since she was a girl in her learning bowl. Selek is an expert on Human relations, Klingon technology, is fluent in Legarian and a variety of bizarre knowledge areas. He makes exquisite cloths and made her a most elegant silk shawl which is where they made acquaintance. That and being the FEDERATION AMBASSADOR. For Some reason he was appointed Federation Ambassador alongside Sarek who had been doing it for years. T'pau realized that maybe it was best not to know, and it had never come up in conversation. T'pau was sure that the answer might test her tenuous control over her feelings of anger and frustration with it. There is that old saying "Ignorance is Bliss." Though she was head of the Vulcan High Council, she let younger more flexible minds on her council battle. The Federation had an entire bureau for such matters. Time Travel gave her an earache.
He has not made koon-at-sol-ik to her or courted her, but he acts so odd. He lives in a time all his own. He does every undignified thing, grunting, using strange language and sarcasm, crinkling up the corners of his dark eyes behind wrinkles. He is always squinting at her as if she is interesting.
Lately the old man has hounded her like a naughty Klingon, trying to argue with her. He leaves her quotes from human poets as book marks in her sacred books with the most decadent and emotional sentiment in them. It should be offensive. She knows it was he that snuck into her quarters and hacked into her computer terminal to crash her hard drive with Erotic Pornography. He said that Computers were one of his great "passions" and he would be happy to assist her "in her quarters." As if T'pau was a 40 year-old ninny who was in awe of a man who could push buttons on a screen. She ignores him and gets the young noviate to purge the hard drive. T'pau wonders if Selek has ever successfully courted anyone this way. Normally only the youngest boys would act this silly when others went into Pon Farr. Unlike women, all men in the area could be…so effected. The Time Traveler was "hitting on" her. The Fires of T'pel burned in her poor ears. If T'pau was not mistaken she would think Selek was on HIS pon farr.
T'pau might have pitied the old man and been with him to quench his fire, but door remained shut this year and may remain so till the end of her life, though the need was great. Even with a winsome lad like Spock prowling around the Caverns like a earthen tiger (all claws and shoulders and hips) Nature would not pity her and allow her the flush of Plak to give her more children to replace Sapaun and T'kossa, Lost in Vulcan Before. Pity is not logical.
Pon Farr was gentler with those of long hair and short years. There was no order or fairness in such events, at least one she could percieve yet. It seemed like the whole universe in a violent Pon Farr of its own. An out of control dissolution into nothingness. But Pon Farr to a Vulcan was only a part of life a cycle in the rhythm of C'thia. T'pau said nothing, for she is Vulcan, and it the only Vulcan illogic left to hope.
Her liter arrives and is planted on the ground.
Spock kneels before her and gives her the Ta'al in respect, she returned.
The Humans stand near Spock and they behold the spectacle.
Humans are clever, not wise. They have a profound resourcefulness and flexibility and can mimic everything. They can look at the truth and see a thousand truths and still never completely lie. But they are like frightened little animals in the arena.
They are not attuned to notice or communicate in the way of Vulcans. They do not hear the Vulcans chatter with each other through the bonds of telepathy. Vulcans sent images to each other when their blood is pounding heavy. The humans feel the place though, still in their skins and minds and imaginations which tower over Vulcans, who only live in Kaadith, and follow C'thia.
They walk around odd memories of Duels and marriages and love confessions and double deaths. (When both lover and beloved die in sympathy). They cannot communicate so it seems even more terrifying. They hear a scream of violence. A union of two star crossed lovers whose parents were blind to the logic of their union. They hear a virgin couple in the throws of heat, taking each other under the skies of Vulcan in view of the assembly and a man having his head ripped off his neck. They do not see the T'sai T'phia slice through her consort's bowels with a blood soaked lyrpa. Or the grand musician S'klaris hanging from an ahnwoon off a cliff, by the neck till green and dead.
They are used to this so the glamour of such a place is lost to them. Things like murder, robbery and sexual lasciviousness happened still in every human city, but it might be unfair to call all of them murderous and lusty.
Jim Kirk stands attendant like a pe'le'ut'la (chaperon) to the young glorious Spock. They stand near him like a pair of butterflies guarding a great dragon.
She whispers to Spock "Are our ceremonies for outworlders?"
Spock is a little in the plaktow already, his voice rougher then it needs to be "They are not outworlders they are my friends. I am permitted this."
Thee names these outworlders friends, how does thee pledge their behavior?
With my life T'pau.
This is Kirk.
Ma'am.
Kirk, youngest of the trio, all the Vulcans do know. Kirk of the Enterprise. His recklessness is only matched by his sense of honor. His hair is warm bronze. His eyes are blue. He is not smiling today, but when he does the door to every maidens' heart must be rattled open a bit. His was the great beauty suitable only for maidens. An example of his race and their skill charm and its flaws. Sure he may be beautiful to bed and winsome… but he could use his skill on other women. Who knows how many human maids and women he has bedded… Maybe even four.
If Pon farr escalates past the doors of the Caverns, he will be sexually assaulted. What's worst is the human walks through the haze of lust and pheromones, ignoring every woman there, disinterested except to hold Spock's hand and tell him it would be alright.
That is a poor decision as Spock snarls for him to let go.
And thee are called?
Leonard McCoy, ma'am.
The healer, Dr. McCoy is slightly older and somehow just as biddable. His hair is woodlike brown few Vulcan men posess. His emotional shields look as a Kohlinar Adept, but he projects memories, not knowing the Vulcans can overhear them. He thinks of his previous mate, constantly. She was an unfaithful mate and took another male. T'pau was surprised to find out this was unsuitable behavior for most Qomi, just as it was with Vulcans. Worst of all she would not show him their child, for humans are needful of their children. They must see their children as surely as they need to eat or sleep, even before the children are grown up and their minds are trained. He wanted to see the child and the cruel woman would not relent. Even though he begged and cried and did everything honorable to see her. Maybe Qomi were not so different. He will never bow to another again. He found a home in the stars. His spirit is gentle and pained. T'pau thinks were she younger she would bed him. She speculates what it would be to have a child of unusual virtue as was the fashion of these days. Now that the Elegant Sciences caused such bastards to live among them, now as necessary to the safety of Vulcan's genetic diversity. If humans were not so bright with such a foul smell it might be a challenge for her strong spirit. And if she could open her own door, heavy with age and stress…
Spock stands expectant and hopeful. His katra at it's zenith flanked by human auras. It is a sight of great beauty and power and that thing that is painful, hope.
"What we are about to see comes down from the time of the beginning. Without change. This is the Vulcan Heart. This is the Vulcan soul. This is Our Way."