Dear Journal,
I'm really tired, so I'm not going to go way into detail tonight.
Anyway...in a few days, it's gonna be Koizumi's birthday, and I've really been thinking about things...
Remembering Koizumi's confession...that day when we watched the fireworks...
And feeling so...riled up remembering it.
I guess I can't deny the fact that I like Koizumi anymore...because no matter how much I try and deny it, I know that it's true.
I feel different when I'm with her now.
Back when I was unsure of my feelings, she drove me insane, but I still knew she was a good person and that she was actually a good friend of mine. But I couldn't think of her as more than a friend.
Now, it's changed a bit. When I'm with her, I hide it, but I actually feel a bit more excited when we talk now.
I guess I ended up going into detail anyway, heh.
Oh well. I'll admit...that I get a little bit more lively when I think of her. Just a little.
- Atsushi Otani
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Dear Journal,
For real this time, I'm tired and gonna make this quick.
I guess Koizumi doesn't want anything from me for her birthday, so whatever, I'm not gonna waste my money on something she doesn't want.
'Night.
- Atsushi Otani
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Dear Journal,
I was tempted to get Koizumi something today, but I ended up not doing it.
Because I went to the jewerly store with Suzuki and Nakao and that didn't help our manly images.
I found something perfect for her, but ended up not buying it. Whatever. She didn't want anything.
- Atsushi Otani
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Dear Journal,
I'm...kinda freaking out at the moment.
I got something for Koizumi and she was happy in the end, so it's all good...
But also...
I couldn't help it, and I...
Uhm...
Okay, here's how it went.
At first...my mom wouldn't let me out of the house for a while because I had to do the dishes, so I was kinda late.
Then, I went back to the jewelry store and stood there for a while, wondering if I should get it or not...
Then I just got it and tried to ignore all the girls staring at the sole guy in the whole store, which was me.
Anyway, I was wondering if I was gonna make it to her party...but I ran there as fast as I could anyway, because I had to make it for her. Even though I tripped on my shoelaces and fell on my face a few times, I made pretty good time.
The fireworks were going off again, and all Koizumi's friends were looking at the fireworks. I made it up there as quickly and quietly as I could, because if Koizumi's friends knew that I got her that necklace, they'd tease me to no end for weeks, I figured.
So I made it up there and stood there for a minute, looking at the fireworks...and maybe recalling some memories...
Then I finally decided it was time to text Koizumi so that I could get her attention.
Then I felt really odd as she came up to me. I was so...nervous. I had never been that nervous around Koizumi before.
Whenever she said something, her sentences repeated over and over in my head...and I couldn't stop staring at her...she actually isn't as ugly as I thought.
So I gave her the necklace and she really liked it, as I thought she might.
I thought I would be less nervous then...but I still felt so tense.
Then...I couldn't take it anymore...and I...
Uh...
Kissed her.
I was wondering why I did that all of the sudden, but I couldn't take it anymore. I hid it as much as I could and kept my cool, but on the inside, my stomach was doing flips.
She seemed really shocked, and at first I was afraid that she didn't want me to kiss her...
But then she was a bit more happy about it.
So...as you can imagine, I'm pretty much going insane at the moment.
So it's a really dumb question whether I like Koizumi or not now. That's not even a question.
- Atsushi Otani