Chapter 15:

Nicole POV

"It's not that bad…."

"Liar. I can see that smile on your faceplates." I grumbled, still looking in the mirror at my now hot pink hair. "Too bad Prowl said I couldn't kill the twins."

I glared at Barricade's hologram in the mirror. He was still smiling. "You better wipe that grin off your faceplates or you're going to find yourself missing a bond mate."

He just laughed softly before wrapping his arms around my waist and kissing my ear. "You wouldn't do that."

"How can you be so sure?"

"You love me too much."

I frowned at his reflection as he pulled my pink hair back from my face. "Confident mech, aren't you? I hate it when you're right."

Barricade just kept smiling. "You already washed the make up off, I see."

"God, yes. It felt weird."

"It…wasn't that bad."

I snorted. "Barricade, they used the mascara like a paintbrush and wrote 'Idiot' across my forehead. And I looked like a clown with all that blue and pink eye shadow. Why Taylor has so much in so many different colors is beyond me."

Barricade shook his head and held his hand out. "Do you have a hair band or something?"

I pulled a rubber band off my wrist. "Will this do?"

"Yeah." He pulled my hair back and started to brush through it with a brush that Taylor had given me. The white streak that had been in my hair was now hidden by the bright pink dye.

Once he was done I turned around and wrapped my arms around his waist. "So, lover, you want to sneak out?"

"Sneak out?"

"Yeah. Like, the car wash and then an auto repair shop. Then we can go to Home Depot and Wal-Mart. After that we can do anything you want."

"Why the auto repair shop? Ratchet said I was fine."

I snorted again. "Barricade, babe, have you not looked in a mirror? You need a new paintjob."

He smiled. "I guess you're right."

"I am right. I'm always right."

"Now who's confident?" Before I could reply, he bent down and scooped me up, his arms under my legs and back.

Surprised, I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Whoa. That was unexpected."

My sparkmate didn't say anything as he carried me out of the bathroom bridal style and I watched as the mech form of him transformed back into a Mustang. The driver's door opened and he set me in gently.

His hologram disappeared and we rolled towards the open hangar door. It was night outside now, and only a few people and bots were still in the hangar. As we passed the checkpoint, Barricade asked me, "Are you sure we can leave?"

I waved away his concern. "We're too far gone now. And if we do get in trouble, I'll take the blame. What's the worst they can do? Send me to my room?" I said, thinking back to Ratchet's punishment.

"Our room."

"Our room." I agreed.

"What do you need at Wal-Mart and Home Depot anyway?"

"Hmm, can't tell you yet, 'Cade."

Barricade's engine revved as he sped faster on the open desert. "I may be your spark mate, but I do not want to be involved in the prank war, got it?"

"Meow. But fine, I wont ask for your help."

"Good."

Three hours later….

"Can you open the trunk already? These bags are freakin' heavy."

Barricade did as I said and opened the trunk. I had twenty something Wal-Mart bags on my arms. Each filled with things to use to prank the twins.

Call me paranoid, but I kept looking over my shoulder because I was expecting a 'Con to jump out and start shooting us down. Barricade must've seen this, because he turned his hologram on and helped me put the Wal-Mart bags in beside the Home Depot ones, which were filled with hand tools and other hardware that were also going to aid me in the prank war.

No doubt the twins were gathering all of their things, too.

After I had finally shut the trunk, I studied Barricade's new paint job. While I had been in Wal-Mart and Home Depot, he had gone to a 24/7 Auto Shop. They had done a spectacular job, I must say. Barricade now sported two pristine white stripes that contrast with the shiny black. I was amazed at how fast they had done it.

"Like it?" Barricade asked, pulling out of the parking spot while I observed from the street. "Definitely. You look hot, babe. How'd it dry so fast?"

"I used my heating panels to make it dry faster. You should've seen the looks on the mechanics faces when I told them it was dry."

Smirking, I got in the driver's seat. "Too bad you didn't take a picture."

An hour later…..

"Ohh, ya got in trouble, Nicki."

"Shut up, Jazz."

The saboteur continued to tease me as I walked to my quarters I shared with Barricade. After getting back to base, I had met an angry Ratchet and an annoyingly cheerful Jazz(sure, I knew he had finally bonded to Prowl, it was about time, but did he have to be so….happy about everything? Like me getting chewed out?).

Anyway, the medic sent Barricade to our quarters, deciding that the whole thing was my fault. Of course, I didn't say anything, but my sparkmate looked very smug as he walked out the Med Bay's doors. Ratchet had once again lectured me about being responsible and mature and all that crap. I only half-listened, talking to Barricade over the bond(when the Hatchet realized what I was doing, he turned on his hologram and smacked me on the back of my head). In the end, the irate medic sent me back to my room.

This, like last time, really peeved me, but I kept my mouth shut and walked out with Jazz following.

As we turned a corner, Jazz started playing the Cops theme song, Bad Boys. I glared at him. "You have to be the most immature mech I have ever met, Jazz. I seriously don't see how you got the position of TIC."

" 'Cause I'm charmin' and got a cute aft."

"Jazz, I'm pretty sure that only Prowl thinks you have a cute aft."

"So? I still do."

"I'm not going to even comment on that."

Jazz snorted, visor glowing brightly. "Ya got chewed out by the Hatchet."

I rolled my eyes. "I am very aware of that, thank you."

"Yer very welcome, Nicki."

"Why are you even walking around at this hour, Jazzy?" I asked, throwing his own nickname at him.

I might as well have been talking to damn wall. Jazz seemed to be off in another world now, his visor dim but somehow he still managed to not walk into walls as we turned corners. After a minute, I stopped walking, my hands on my hips and glaring a hole in the back of Jazz's helm as he kept walking. The mech was oblivious to the fact that I had stopped.

I sighed and ran to catch up with him. When I was closer, I took off my shoe, aimed, and threw the tennis shoe, hitting him smack in the back of the helm.

Jazz jumped like I had shot him and whirled around, weapon system already engaging. I shook my head and waved at him. "Yo, earth to Jazz. What planet were you on while I was talking?"

If I could've seen Jazz's optics, I would've bet he blinked. Staring at my shoe on the ground now, he said, "I was talkin' ta Prowler. He's in his office right now, doin' some reports."

I rolled my eyes as I picked up my shoe. "Of course." I muttered.

Jazz was still staring at me. "How the frag did you hit my helm?"

"You're not the tallest Autobot, Jazz."

"I wouldn't be talkin', human."

I froze in tying my shoe. Shoelaces forgotten, I stood up and pointed at the silver Solstice, glaring again. "Oh no. You so did not just pull the species card."

He crossed his arms, looking smug. "I think I jus' did."

My eyes narrowed at him. "Well, Jazz, you just found your way to second place on my prank list, right after the twins. And I bought plenty of things to use."

The saboteur shrugged, grinning. "Ohhh, I supposed to be 'fraid?"

I started walking backwards down the hall, still facing him. "Yes, be very afraid-" I yelped as suddenly I fell backwards, having stepped on my shoelaces.

I groaned at Jazz's laughing faceplates as he leaned over me. "Don'cha know how ta tie yer shoelaces, Nicki?"

He took off down the hall as I sat up, trying to decide whether or not to shock him into stasis and deal with Prowl's wrath.

"Damn saboteur." I muttered, getting up.

Barricade, the bastard, was laughing on the other end of the bond.

Prank 1:

Jazz was unnerved. Nicole was acting too happy, especially for as little sleep as she should've gotten last night.

When he had walked into the Rec. room that morning(after dragging Prowl back to their quarters the night before), he had been surprised to see Taylor and Willow standing around a smirking Nicole, who ignored their questions and continued to flip through the channels on TV. He had gotten an Energon cube and sat at a table where he could observe.

After a few more minutes of trying, the two human femmes had given up and stomped out of the Rec. room. It was then that Nicole had transwarped right next to him on the table. "What's up, Jazz?"

"Nothin'…" He said, giving the girl a wary look.

She grinned wickedly. "What's wrong, Jazz? You act….disturbed."

"The look on yer face is disturbin' me."

Nicole put her hand over her heart, feigning mock hurt. "So hurtful, Jazz."

Jazz finished the cube in one gulp and stood up, trying to look imposing to the human. "Okay, Nicole, what'd ya do this time?" Then he looked around, surprised, just noticing that her sparkmate wasn't in the room with the other Autobots and few humans. "Where's 'Cade?"

"He's sleeping late." She said, sitting down on the table. "And what makes you think I did anything?"

By now, bystanders in the room began to notice what was going on and were watching in interest. Jazz ignored them, and held his servos up. "One, ya look happy. Two, last night ya were makin' threats 'bout pranks, but now ya act as if nothin' happened. Three, my instincts tell me something's 'bout ta happen, and I don't want to be anywhere close when it happens."

Nicole scowled up at him. "Well then. I didn't know it was a crime to be happy." She shrugged, scowl dropping and the I-don't-really-care look came back. "Just wait, Jazz. You'll see."

Jazz glared at the human femme, but the look was lost on the human femme as she continued to watch TV from her perch on the table. The saboteur sighed and started to make his way to Prowl's office. Since being resurrected, he had started doing his work in Prowl's office.

An hour later, Jazz had his pedes on Prowl's desk and the chair he was sitting tilted back, reading the latest report from Mirage. His bond mate sat across from him, typing away on his computer.

That's when he heard the first explosion.

Prowl shot straight out of his chair while Jazz toppled backwards with a yelp. But as soon as he got over his shock he scrambled back up. He and his sparkmate shared a look before both of them started scanning for 'Cons.

Neither of them detected anything, but they could hear several thundering footsteps and shouts outside the door.

~Prowl to Ironhide. What was that?~ The tactician the Weapons Specialist as he and Jazz began to follow the stream of Autobots and humans towards the explosion.

~…..You better come to the training room and see for yourself, Prowl.~

Prowl swore he heard a grin in the connection.

Jazz and Prowl stared at the scene before them.

And stared.

Then Jazz burst out laughing and even Prowl grinned.

When they had gotten to the training room, they had found the twins, strung up from the ceiling by a cable. Sideswipe's pede was caught in a loop of thick cable along with both of Sunstreaker's pedes. Both of them had pink glittery paste splattered all over their frames in random splotches.

Neither of them were laughing like the crowd surrounding them.

Below them, Nicole was standing with two thing: a camera and what looked like a Nerf water gun filled with pink glitter paste.

The human femme was snapping pictures from all angles, occasionally stopping to shoot a few squirts of paste at the two mechs. Said mechs were cursing her to Pit and back.

Prowl and Jazz shouldered their way to the front. Nicole looked up grinning. "Hey, Prowl, Jazz."

Jazz waved absently, still gawking at the twins. Prowl, instead, tried vainly to restrain the grin on his faceplates. He failed. "Um, Nicole? Why would the twins be…" At loss for words, he gestured to their predicament.

They scowled at him.

She continued to snap pictures. "Well, last night, after everyone fell asleep, I came in here and set up this little trap. There were sensor panels under the area of the loop. It was supposed to activate whenever only the twins stepped on it. And, as you can see, it did."

Sideswipe glared at the girl while Sunstreaker tried to spit glitter out of his mouth. "How the frag did you rig it to go off for our exact weight?"

"I hacked the Hatchet's files-"

There was a colorful curse from the medic but it was lost to the voices of the bystanders.

"-and set it. Then I rigged up that pulley system over there to yank the cable up automatically," She finished, pointing towards the system. "After that, I just put a sign in the middle of the loop that said, 'Step if you dare'. Being the idiots they are, they of course stepped in it."

Sunstreaker started to cuss at the girl again until she picked the gun up and shot him in the mouth with it. "You'd be surprised how many times I've had to do that." She muttered.

Jazz finally overcame his shock and stared down at Nicole with new respect. "I don't think I'll ever doubt ya 'gain, Nicki."

Nicole grinned at him. "Thank you, Jazz. Oh, and one more thing-" She aimed the Nerf gun at him and started to squirt. "Payback!"

Jazz, in turn, ducked behind a shocked Prowl after two squirts. Which led to Prowl being squirted. Which made the amusement leave Prowl's faceplates.

With a firm frown, Prowl pointed towards the door. "Office. Now."

She groaned, but turned to leave... After trying to squirt Jazz again.

Prank 2:

"Did you find it?"

"Yeah, but not before the thing scratched my paint."

"Deal with it, sunshine. Now, give it here."

"Surely you're not going to drop it in the bucket, Sides? I thought you were smarter than that."

"No, I'm going to dump the bucket on it."

"Oh. Well, just hurry."

Prowl was enjoying his bookfile. Until he heard an enraged screech echo across the base.

Three days before Prowl had sentenced Nicole to what Jazz called 'Detention'. It was where the human girl would sit in a cell specially designed for transwarping Decepticons with absolutely nothing but a dictionary. He had also forced Barricade into blocking the bond with her, after much arguing with the Mustang. In the end, there had been one fragged-off-at-her-bondmate and bored Nicole.

About halfway through the five hour punishment she had started reading the dictionary.

Back to reading his bookfile.

Prowl sighed, put his bookfile down, and got up, ready to deal with whatever had happened now. Before he could leave his desk though, there was a flash of blue light and Nicole appeared on his desk.

She had tried to wash out the pink dye, and only half succeeded, leaving her hair a weird pink and black mixture. Now she had her hair pinned up and looked like a smaller version of a fragged off Ratchet. And what was she holding….?

Nicole glared up a Prowl. "Prowl, those idiots touched my cat!"

"What?" Prowl asked, feeling his processor start to grind to halt.

"Look!" She held out her arms. What she had been holding was the cat named Spice, only now she was…..green.

Prowl bent down to examine the cat. Spice glared back sullenly. "Why is your cat green, Nicole?"

"What do you think, Prowl? The twins, that's what! They dyed Spice, my baby!"

"Your….baby?"

"Yes!"

"And…you want me to punish them?""Well, I certainly didn't come here to ask you to give them a Goddamn medal!"

Prowl continued to stare at the strange scene before straightening up and looking away. Just staring at the feline made him want to glitch…..

"I'll...see what I can do..." He said slowly, still trying not to let his processor lock up.

Nicole grunted, brushing her fingers through Spice's now green hair. "Good." Turning her attention back to her cat, she said in a sickly sweet voice, "Oh, baby, I'm so sorry..." Then she transwarped.

Prowl continued to stare at the spot where she had been before walking out in the hall with a dazed look on his face. As the door closed behind him, he muttered, "I think I need to go for a drive..."

Prank 3:

Both Sunstreaker and Sideswipe walked through the halls of the base, looking over their shoulders every so often and jumping at the slightest noises. Sunny nearly went into battle mode when Bluestreak said hi.

The Twin Terrors were suspecting Nicole to pull a prank, at anytime. Neither of them had been able to wash off all of the pink glitter, so for the past week and a half they had been glittery. Sunny had nearly used up all of his best soap trying to wash the glue-like substance off.

Everyone in the base was immensely enjoying it too. The fact that the twins were on the receiving end of pranks now was hilarious. The twins didn't really think it was funny. Not. One. Bit.

Finally, finally, they made it to their quarters. While Sideswipe checked the door for tampering, Sunstreaker kept watch. After making sure it wasn't tampered with, Sides opened the door, then moved to the side really quick to avoid anything that came out.

Sure enough, neon green paint splattered the wall where the twins had been standing. Sunny snorted. "That was so amateur."

Sides nodded, grinning. "A shame, really. I though we taught her better."

"A shame." His twin agreed as they walked into their quarters.

They both froze when they saw what was in front of them. And aimed at them.

Hanging from the ceiling was a large bucket that was dripping green paint on the floor. On the floor there were four paint ball guns set on tripods, each loaded and pointed at them.

And in the middle of the row of paint ball guns, with her own loaded guns, was Nicole, wearing goggles and a slag-eating grin.

Pointing the gun at them, she said, "Surprise, surprise. You honestly didn't think that was my best shot, did you?"

Then she fired, and the paint ball guns fired.

Jazz was on monitor duty when he first saw the twins.

On camera fifteen, he saw them scramble out of their quarters, covered in something. Too bad the cameras were black and white.

He leaned forward for a better view, optics squinting behind his visor. Then on camera sixteen, they were running down the halls, towards Optimus' and Prowls' offices. He quickly his sparkmate and commander to open their office doors but stay out of the hall. They had to see this.

Prowl stepped out in his office, confused. The hall was empty save for Optimus, who had just stepped out of his office. He sent his commander a questioning look. "Did Jazz tell you exactly what was so important for us to abandon our-". The tactician was cut off as they both heard pounding footsteps from down the hall. They simultaneously leaned out of their doorways to see what it was.

Two silver, gold, and….neon pink…blurs whipped past them.

Prowl looked at the Prime again. His faceplates echoed exactly what he was thinking. 'What the frag was that?'

Just as Optimus opened his mouth, there was a flash of blue light and Nicole appeared, yelled, "Gotcha!", and fired what looked like a paint ball gun at Optimus.

After firing off a few shots, she realized exactly who it was and stopped firing. Nicole's hazel eyes were wide behind her goggles. "Oops. Well, shit. Sorry, Optimus, I though you were one of the twins."

Then she transwarped again.

After a moment of stunned silence, Prowl asked, "How the frag did she mistake you for one of the twins?"

Optimus wasn't looking at Prowl. He was looking down at his now neon pink splattered chest plates. After another moment of staring, he sighed and started walking down the hall, towards the wash racks. "Elita is going to be amused when she hears about this…."

That night, after Nicole finally gave up the chase because she ran out of paint balls, the twins tried vainly to wash off the paint. Except it had dried. And all of the paint remover in the base had either disappeared or everyone was with holding their own stock from the twins. Even the extra silver and gold paint had disappeared.

So, after three hours of scrubbing and cursing, the twins had walked shamefully back to their quarters. They were covered in neon pink paint. And everyone had laughed at their faceplates the whole time.

When Jazz saw them, he said, "Wow. She's was really hung up on the pink hair thing, wasn't she?"

That had gotten him two glares.

Both twins eyed the wall across from their quarters. The green paint had been scrubbed free. Just as they walked in their quarters, Sides spotted a large box that had been planted just inside the door.

"Hey, Sunny, come here."

"What?" The mostly pink warrior said irritably.

Sideswipe held up two Transformer-sized paint bottles. One was red, the other was a bright yellow. Attached to the red bottle was a small note. It read:

'You can either stay neon pink or be ketchup and mustard. I'll let you pick who gets which color.

; ) It was fun, mechs!

Your favorite human,

Nicole'

Both of twins stared at the note. Then Sideswipe said, "She. Is. Evil."

Sunny glared at the two bottles. "That was some whole elaborate scheme just to get us change our paint?"

"Apparently so."

"Well, I'm not going to fall for it."

Sunny stood up clutching the red bottle and stalked to the door. "I'm going to go tell her just what I think about this-"

As he threw the door open, a series of flashes went off, and then blurs looked suspiciously like Beachcomber and the Chevy twins took off down the hall, cackling.

Sides watched to see Sunny's reaction. For a moment, he just stood there. Then he took a step back into the room, slammed the door, and turned around glowering.

"I call yellow."

Prank 4:

Nicole POV

"Hey, Jazz." I said cheerfully as I walked in the Rec room.

Jazz waved absently, focusing on his poker game with Smokescreen, Cliffjumper, Mirage, and Hound.

Barricade walked in behind me and went towards the Energon dispenser. The Autobots and humans in the room barely glanced at him. It seemed that over the past two weeks and a half, ever since I had announced my bond to Barricade, the residents of the base had grown used to his presence. As you can guess, this made me one happy Nicole.

While I waited for Barricade to come back, I transwarped to one of the Transformer-sized with a human sized chair. I sat down to wait for my sparkmate. Once he returned, we started talking about random things.

In the middle of his sentence, Barricade cut off as his optics flashed. I shivered. His optics. I was ashamed to admit it, but…..Barricade's optics sort of unnerved me. Okay, scared me. They reminded me too much of Megatron's optics. Barricade had noticed, too, which made it all worse. I hoped I was able to keep my thoughts out of the bond, but Barricade wasn't stupid. He knew something was bothering me.

He looked back down at me. I forced myself to meet his gaze. "What was it?"

"Ratchet. He said to get my aft down to the Med Bay for a check up."

"Check up?"

"A three week check up since Megatron nearly shot my spark out. This should be my last one if everything goes well, which it will."

I gave him a weak smile. "That's great, babe." Then I looked away from his optics.

I felt concern from his end of the bond. He gently lifted my face to look at his faceplates. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, Barricade."

He frowned at my response. I winced mentally. I hated lying to him.

Instead of questioning me further, Barricade stood up. "I'll be back in a little while."

" 'Kay."

"See you later."

I watched as my sparkmate left the room, my heart twisting. Why oh why was I so afraid of my sparkmate?

You are not afraid of him. You are afraid of what his optics remind of.

I jumped at the sudden voice. That voice was familiar…..

Suddenly it dawned on me. The AllSpark was speaking to me.

I resisted the urge to roll my eyes. Great, now I have a psychiatrist in my head.

I sighed, then tried to shift in my chair. Only my butt wouldn't move.

Frowning, I looked at the chair. It seemed normal….

Wait. What was that on the seat….? I touched it and tried to pull my finger back. It stuck to the chair.

My eyes widened. I tried to get out of the chair. The chair lifted off the table.

Oh shit.

I was either going crazy, or the twins had glued the chair. If they had, it was very fast drying glue.

I looked over the edge of the table at the other human chairs surrounding the human tables. Taylor, Willow, and Simmons were sitting in three of four chairs surrounding the tables. And all of the chairs had a glistening shine to them. Surely the twins weren't that dumb as to put glue in all of the chairs….

Shit, shit, shit…..

I tried to turn the chair around to face Jazz, but do you know how hard that is when both of your hands are glued to the sides of the seat? (I had accidentally put both hands on the sides in an attempt to turn around; yes, that means I qualify for an idiot)

"Jazz! Psst! Jazz!" I tried to whisper, since I knew his sensitive audios would pick it up.

At first he just glanced at me. "Wha', Nicki? I'm kinda in the middle of somethin' here."

"Yeah, well, I'm kinda stuck to the chair here!"

That made him look up. "What?"

"I'm stuck to this damn fragging chair!"

"Stuck ta it? How?"

"The twins put glue in all of the chairs."

At this point Jazz stood up, after putting his cards face down. As he walked over me, I watched Smokescreen try to peek under the deck. Mirage slapped his servo away.

Jazz bent down to look me in the eye. "So ya can't get up?"

"No, and my hands are stuck, too."The silver mech stared at me for a few seconds before laughing. I glared at him. "Shut up! Before someone notices!"

Too late. The mechs who had been playing poker were now interested, and so were Taylor, Willow, and Simmons.

I groaned as Taylor tried to get up. And failed. I had been correct. The twins were idiots. They had put glue in every chair.

Well, this certainly didn't help either of their chances with Taylor or Willow.

"They did WHAT?"

Prowl, Optimus, and Wheeljack stared at us with wide optics. I groaned again, still glued to the fragging chair that Jazz currently holding. Mirage was holding Willow while Hound held Taylor. Simmons had flat out refused to be carried in what he called 'such a demeaning fashion'. Smokescreen had just come along for the show.

Willow was still cursing up a storm under her breath as they stared at us. Taylor just stared at her lap, hands still glued to the side like mine, looking like she was in shock.

Once again, I tried to shift in the chair, but no such luck. I was really starting to get a rash in some places better not mentioned.

The twins were going to pay for this.

"They dumped glue in every human chair in the Rec room. And, as you can see, it worked."

They stared at us for another few seconds before Optimus' optics went dim. I assumed he was going to call the twins. Prowl seemed to make a decision as his door wings straightened up. "That's it. I'm putting an end to this…..prank war."

Off to the side, I heard Smokescreen groan. "But it was just getting good…."

Note to self: glare at him whenever Jazz turns around, seeing as I can't turn myself.

Jazz, who I just knew was grinning, asked, "Well, 'Jack, anyway we can get'em off the chairs with out acid or bombs or any other harmful devices?"

Wheeljack continued to stare at Willow, who had a scowl on her face and her arms crossed. "Do scissors count as harmful devices?"

Once the meaning of the question dawned on us three girls, Taylor made a strangled noise in her throat and Willow started cursing again.

"No damn fragging way are you cutting my pants off! These are some of my favorites! Look how old they are!" She started pointing to several Sharpie markings. "Look! That was three years ago!"

Smokescreen actually looked while the other mechs in the room smiled, except Prowl, who remained serious. "I'm sorry, Willow, but it appears that that is the only option."

Willow started to squirm, cursing Prowl, the twins, and the dude who invented glue.

I looked at Taylor, knowing how much she valued her clothes. My eyes went wide. "Taylor, are you crying?"

She looked at me pitifully and nodded. "Yeah…"

I shook my head, amazed. "How do you love your clothes so much?"

"Jus' the way Sunstreaker an' Tracks love their paint." Jazz said, and though I couldn't see him, I knew he was smiling.

I tried to turn around and glare at him, and failed. "Oh, sure, Jazz! Laugh all you slagging want to! If our roles were reversed, you'd be pretty fragged off too!"

"Nicki, if our roles were reversed like ya said, ya wouldn't be able to hold me like I am ya."

"Again! With the species card! What is wrong with you!"

"Lotsa things."

"Dammit, Jazz-"

I was cut off as the door opened, and in walked a red Sideswipe and a yellow Sunstreaker. So, they had actually repainted themselves.

The smug looks on their faceplates disappeared when both Willow and Taylor started saying things that I had never heard come from their mouths. Taylor, sweet, little, kind, blonde, Taylor, was cussing! Amazing(somewhere in the back of my mind I shouted 'Hallelujah!', too)!

And Willow. The girl had dyed her hair a bright red color a few days before, and now I swear it was turning a dark red as her face got red from anger.

A look of horror came onto the twins faces. If I could've, I would've crossed my arms. Instead I just smirked. "You two are so fragged."

Both of them shot me glare. "Snitch." said Sideswipe over the dirty words coming from my two female compadres.

That made me even madder. "You little fragger-" I started to shout, but Optimus put his servos up and shouted, "Silence!"

Everyone in the room got quiet.

He glared at me, Sideswipe, and Sunstreaker. "You three. Brig now." Then he looked at Willow and Taylor. "I'm sorry, but I'm afraid….you'll have to cut yourself out. I can get someone to help you-"

Willow cut him off. "Oh no way in hell are you getting someone to help me cut my pants off!" I started cracking up at that, but Prowl shot me a glare. I (wisely) shut up. Willow continued. "If anyone's going to do it, it's going to be me. Once I'm out, I'm going to kill them." She gave the twins pointed glares. Sides winced. Sunny scowled.

Taylor sniffed. "What about me?"

"I'll help you, then kill them." Then, almost as if it was after though, she turned and glared at me. "I might get you too for starting this whole thing."

If I could've thrown my hands up, I would be doing it now. "I didn't start it! They dyed my hair!"

"You shocked us!" The twins shouted simultaneously.

"Brig. Now." Prowl ordered in a stern voice.

I sagged in my seat. "Well, damn."

Barricade POV

"Are you done yet?"

"Barricade, ask me again and I'll give you a reason to stay here overnight." Ratchet snapped.

I shut my mouth, because I knew the medic would act on the threat, and Nicole would be less than pleased that I wouldn't be able to return to quarters.

I sighed. Nicole. She…was afraid of me. Or not me, but my optics. They reminded her too much of a Decepticon, specifically Megatron. She had tried to hide it through the bond, but I could tell the way she acted that she had been bothered by something. When she started looking away from my optics it fell into place. What kind of sparkmate was I, scaring the love of my life?

I watched as Ratchet began to study the scans on my systems. Now was as good as time as any….

"Ratchet?"

"What?" He snapped irritably.

"I want you to change my optics to blue."

Me: Dun, dun, DUN!

Abusive Me: Ow.

Me: What?

Abusive Me: You just yelled in my ear, bitch.

Me: Deal with it. Now, where was I? Oh yeah, return of the Me's….yay…I guess….

Nice Me: Why don't you sound happier? Aren't you glad we're back?

Me: No, not really.

Nice Me: *Starts to cry* Why not?

Random Me: OH, OH, TEACHER! PICK ME! *jumps up and down, waving hand*

Abusive Me: *grabs her hair and pulls her back down*

Random Me: Ow, ow, ow…

Liar Me: Of course she's glad we're back!

Me: Dammit, Liar, I don't feel like dealing with you right now. Anyway, back to the story. Well, we have a cliffhanger! Sort of… I tried to aim for a humorous chap. I'm not really sure I succeeded, seeing as I've had this in my head the past two months. In my opinion, I don't really like this chapter, because the plot moved, like, three millimeters. Not much. Review if this is a good chap!