Chapter 10

I awake to the sound of Demitri's voice. "She'll wake up when I tell her to wake up." I open my eyes to find myself still perched on the window ledge. Demitri is talking to my dear Cathy. Had I refused to wake up earlier? My head is less fuzzy and I can tell that the medication isn't as strong in my system. I shift my legs and stretch them farther onto the ledge, I am stove up. The movement catches their attention. Demitri heads towards me. Involuntarily I shrink away from him as he grabs me by the front straps of my straightjacket. My head reels momentarily. He sets me firmly onto my feet. "Walk." He orders. I look over at Cathy whom seems to be displeased by Demitri's lack of geniality, yet she says nothing. 'Probably wouldn't do me any good anyway.' She shoots be an apologetic as well as accusatory look, as if I'm partially to blame for my rough treatment.

"Dr. Crane wants to see you." Demitri informs me as we head approach the door. Immediately my feet plant upon hearing those words. Demitri nearly topples over me as he hits solidly into my back. I grunt a little as I'm rocked forward but I remain still. I can hear Demitri take in an infuriated breath. He is holding back in front of Cathy's watchful gaze.

"It'll be alright dear; he just wants to check up on you." Cathy's accent fills my ears. I find it less than reassuring.

'Sure.'

Demitri places a strong hand on my shoulder and leans in close. "If you don't move right now I'm gunna visit you later." He whispers then pats my shoulder, looking as though he had just exchanged some encouraging words. I shudder. Which option is worse? Then it dawns on me that I'd rather see Crane with half of my coherence as opposed to seeing him on a later date, when I could perhaps be completely inebriated with drugs. I continue forward on my own accord as Demitri slides his card into the lock. The automatic click chirps then beeps as the door opens. Cathy follows our heels. "Smart girl," Demitri whispers as we descend down the hall.

Moments later we are standing in front of the office door labeled, 'Dr. Jonathan Crane: Head Psychiatrist.' I find the title completely humorous. He is the head of his field and is indeed a doctor of the head. I audibly take in a deep breath. What would today's session have in store for me? I know Demitri can feel my muscles twitch as he places his hand closer to the back of my neck lest I should bolt. Demitri reaches over me with his free hand to place a few knocks upon the door. Shortly it is opened by Dr. Crane, whom steps to the side to allow Demitri and I passage. "Do you need me to wait nearby?" He asks the doctor as he sits me down in the chair opposite Crane's desk.

"That won't be necessary, I'm quite sure she's aware of the consequences…" Crane trails off as he watches me. Demitri nods as he crosses over the doorway.

"Be back in one hour." Crane orders and shuts the door.

I sit motionless in the chair, eyes downcast, too drowsy to pay the doctor any real attention. I am sure I'll catch hell for it. Crane sits down in his chair; I note how fluid and soundless his movements are.

'Graceful.'

"How are we feeling today?" His voice is soft but his expression hard.

'Well, I know how I'm feeling, not sure how you feel …'

"I'm fine." I have only brought my gaze upward for a fleeting moment.

"Look at me when you speak." Crane suddenly commands and for the life of me, I could not look up. He terrifies me too much now. Yet if I don't obey, what would he do next? Or have done?

Reluctantly I turn in his direction yet I shift my eyes away and to that file cabinet which rests behind his desk. I wonder what I might find in those slick folders. What other names might I find next to mine? What indeed is he hiding?

"What are you thinking?" Crane inquires upon my intense gaze behind him.

"Surprisingly, lots of things…" I leave it open.

"Such as…?"

"You've a lot of file cabinets…"

"I've a lot of patients…"

I smile. "Yes, I'm sure you do."

He tilts his head ever so slightly.

"What are you getting at Kyra?"

I turn my head in a dismissive response.

"Kyra," He warns.

I lick my lips. "My brother…he's here in Arkham, isn't he? That would explain why you've doped me up on so many drugs…you didn't want me to find out. But your orderlies…they slipped up by walking him past me, didn't they?" It is more than I've spoken in a great time and took good concentration to form the words coherently. The drugs are indeed starting to wear off a great deal. He probably knows this yet I try to act as though they are still having an effect. I need all the advantage I can get.

"What if I was to say you're incorrect?" He sounds indignant.

"Then I'd say you are lying."

"He is here in Arkham. You are right about that but as far as his mentality is concerned, he is as far from here as possible." Crane is now standing up.

"So if you're thinking I might allow some sort of family reunion between the two of you, then I seriously need to consider upping your medication." His places his hands on the edges of his desk, knuckles white and angry.

"I understand. That won't be necessary…" I am meek again yet I want to know more about my brother.

"Why is he here?"

"No more questions Kyra. I'm not here to answer your inquiries. Now, let's begin our session, we've wasted enough time." He sits back down and opens a clean slate of paper and pen.

I lean back and exhale a frustrated sigh.

"How are the drugs making you feel? Any concerns as to their effect?" He is professional. I actually gawk at his questions.

"Are you serious? You prescribed them doctor; how the in fuck do you think they're having effect?" I regret my brashness instantly; he would more than likely up my medication now. I start backtracking.

"I'm sorry Dr. Crane. I'm tired, sore, hungry, and irritable, I didn't mean you disrespect."

'Oh yes I did.'

I look down and suck in my top lip, ashamed at my weakness, disgusted by my compliance.

Crane examines me for a good minute, deciding what to do with my sudden passivity. "You just saved yourself a good deal of trouble. I wonder how sincere you actually are." His voice feels closer although he remains in his expensive chair.

"What is your greatest fear?" His expression is grave.

"It's you."

'You polished, bent little bastard…'

"Why is that Kyra?"

"Because I know what you're capable of…I know to what extent you'll go to…"

Crane seems more than pleased with my response. I hear him mark that clean sheet of paper.

"What would you do to achieve my favor?" I look up at this question.

'What?'

I stare through the veil of my side bangs, utterly astounded by the audacity as well as vagueness of his question.

I shrug, truly baffled. "I'd…obey…"

"Come here then." Crane almost gently commands his voice incredulously soft. I quiver with uncertainty. Slowly, carefully I stand up from the chair, straightjacket whistling against the smooth leather. Tentatively I step toward his desk. Fear obvious on my face and feeling like a walking cocoon.

"No, come here." He motions me around the desk. I obey. I stand beside his chair, eyes averted elsewhere. His strong hands tug at the front straps of my jacket, urging me into a sitting position. Crane then lifts my chin upward with his hand. He is gentle as if regretful for making me so fearful of him. I know otherwise.

"Do you know why I stopped to observe you in the recreational room, when you were dozing on the window ledge?" He asks in a low voice, his inescapable eyes devouring me.

I shake my head.

"Because the sunlight made your hair look as if it were fire." He says a little breathlessly. Shocked I start to get up but he holds onto my chin.

"What would you do?" He reaches out with his free hand and play with a strand of my hair making me gasp at the sudden suggestive touch. I am completely taken aback by his behavior, this isn't my doctor, and this isn't the cruel man that I've known.

"Dr. Crane?" I ask in an unsure tone if the same man sitting before me.

"Tell me that you fear me." His voice becomes harsh, demanding.

"I do fear you."

"What?" He asks, voice heightens and eyes glowering.

"I fear you." I repeat as his immobilizing grip bores into my skin.

"Why?"

"Because you're stronger…I have no control, I'm completely under your authority…I'm helpless…so completely helpless…" At the last two words I begin to weep. Crane places both hands on the sides of my face, wiping my tears with his thumbs.

"You won't regret this session." He gently lets go of me.

"Return to your seat."

I am so confused; I get up slowly and return to my chair. What had just happened?

Dr. Crane presses a button on his phone.

"Demitri please come to my office to relieve me of Miss. Rhys, we are finished for today." He glances up at me and I look away.

"You did well today Kyra."