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I'm So Lost, I'm So Cold
Chapter 2
Tears were streaming down my face when Feliciano came in. "Fratello, I eh brought you some pizza…" Oh no. I hid underneath the fluffy covers of our bed before he came closer. "Fratello, please come out. I've seen you cry before and its nothing to be ashamed of!" What? Crying in front of another person is beyond shameful- its degrading!
"Lovino, come out," Feliciano said with a slightly more serious tone. I froze. I crawled out from underneath the covers to see that the raindrops were still racing down my window and made the room darker than usual. Feliciano looked at me with a glint in his eyes.
"What happened?"
"Nothing."
"Okay then, I'll just eat all the pizza by myself downstairs."
"Wait, no!
"Ah, yes?"
I dragged myself closer to him so I didn't have to speak so loudly. "I…" He waited patiently for me to continue my sentence, but I couldn't. Arthur and Antonio in the bed… the more I thought about it, the louder I sobbed. Feliciano scooted close and hugged me. He patted my back in a comforting way which just made the tears worse.
Did Antonio cheat on me because I always pushed him away? I wasn't pushing him away because I didn't love him! I—I just don't know how to be as affectionate and passionate as him. For heaven's sake, he knows all about passion.
"Lovi, please just tell me when you're ready. I don't want you to keep it to yourself. Go to sleep, yeah?" He laid me down and tucked me in and kissed both of my cheeks. "Just like how Grandpa Rome used to tuck us in~" I grinned. The dumbass knows how to make me feel better.
I laid in bed and couldn't fall asleep. My mind kept on drifting off and thinking about Antonio. I didn't even want to think about him. I stared at the raindrops sliding down the window to distract myself. I glanced at the clock and it read 11:27 P.M. Ugh, I just want to sleep already.
The door suddenly opened, snapping me out of my thinking. "Fratello, look at what I made you!" I propped myself up and he sat down next to me. He placed a tray with wafers and a cup of hot chocolate. Not just anyhot chocolate, but Italianhot chocolate. I scarfed down the wafers and ate the hot chocolate. Feliciano started chatting away about how him and Kiku went to Heracles house and played with cats or something. I drifted into a deep sleep, lulled by his voice.
Falling asleep was the worse fucking idea I've ever had.