Edward will make his appearance in this chapter. Fear not! He is not a misogynistic ass or a liar... :D

Stephanie obviously likes her men controlling and I'm not into that at ALL.

This chapter has less Alice, so for all you "fluff" people out there, relax. More will come. I'd like to actually have a plot... Let me know how it's coming along. :)

Also, I barely proof-read this chapter. I hope there aren't too many mistakes. I've been pretty lucky just to find the time to write.

Chapter Three

I woke up before my alarm, sweating and shaking from the nightmare I had just escaped. I closed my eyes tightly, my eyelids twitching. I clenched and unclenched my fists a few times, a tick I had developed since these started five years ago. The repetitive motion seemed to help push the unwanted thoughts away for a while, but the feeling of fear stayed, tainting the good mood I had gone to bed with. I kept my eyes shut, trying desperately to flee from the dream but it wouldn't let go of me.

A flash of red eyes. Blood on the ground, glistening in the small sliver of sun that escaped the clouds above. The smell of iron. The menacing laughter in the air. It all came crashing down on me and I felt myself curl into a ball on my bed, the clenching exercise not cutting it anymore. I struggled to breathe and tears streamed down my face as I choked on my sobs, unable to hold them back. The feeling of panic seized my body and suddenly I couldn't move. I cried out and sobbed, hoping the pain would leave. I couldn't handle it. It was making me sick inside and I felt the food I had eaten the night before curdle in my gut. My body was set free from it's restraints and I quickly made my way to the bathroom, the contents of my stomach heaving into the toilet.

After a few minutes, I sat down on the tub sobbing like a baby, wiping my mouth with the back of my hand while trying to catch my breath. I kept my eyes closed for a moment, then opened them to keep my dizzy spell under control. I quickly turned around and turned the water on, pulling the plug up for the shower head. I stripped quickly and stepped into the freezing water, my skin pebbled in goosebumps.

I let my head soak in the cool water as it warmed. That was the worst one so far... I never had a dream that felt as real as that, as if I was there all over again, every detail just as alive as it was the first time. The smell of blood, the screams, the laughter...the dead, lifeless bodies of my family. It was a perfect replay. It was overwhelming and I felt my lungs close again.

The water finally warmed completely, the steam rising from the shower head. I tried to compose myself, breathing deeply in and out. As my muscles finally warmed up, I stretched a little, letting my body relax. It was over.

Panic attacks were something I had grown accustomed to. I kept a small stash of anti-anxiety medication in the medicine cabinet that I used for emergencies only. They made me drowsy, so I considered whether or not I should take one before going to work. I got out of the shower and pulled a towel around me before opening the cupboard and glancing at the pills. Calling in wasn't an option... I closed the cupboard, instead dressing myself quickly and going out to the porch for a cig while my hair was still wet.

I had to ignore the cold. My scalp felt like it was burning it was so chilled, but I shrugged it off and lit up an American Spirit before laying on the bench. I noticed for the first time that it was still dark outside and glanced at my watch. 4:30 AM. Jesus...

It was rare for me to ever smoke a cigarette before around 11 or so. For some reason it always made me feel sick to my stomach before then but I had been smoking more often as of late. I'd moved from a pack a week to a pack and a half. That's really not too bad considering some people smoke that in a day, but I was hoping it wouldn't come to that for me.

I went inside and started a pot of coffee before slipping upstairs to finish getting ready. After putting on a little makeup and fixing my hair I poured black sludge into a thermos and left the house, intent on getting as much work done as I could to distract myself.

I arrived at work at 6, two hours earlier than usual. Unfortunately it wasn't so early that my boss wasn't there yet. The second I went to unlock my office door I felt a slight tap on the shoulder and turned to Edward Mason adorning his usual cocky smile and an overpriced, dark blue three-piece suit. "Good morning, Bella." His velvety voice trickled through thin lips as his eyes glanced down to the briefcase danging over my shoulder. "You are here far too early. Didn't finish those reports?"

I lead him inside and began rummaging for them as I sat down behind my desk. Finally finding them, I handed them over, taking a long swig of coffee before replying. "I finished these last night. Angela's photos will go nicely on the front page this time, I think. She got a really nice pic at the HorrorPop's show."

Edward sat down across from me in one of the guest chairs in front of my desk, thumbing through the papers to find a copy of the photograph. "Nice, nice. That girl and her music... I didn't think anyone still listened to psychobilly." He looked up and grinned at me. "However, I do enjoy The Cramps from time to time." He whispered, a mischievous glint in his eye as if it were wrong to listen to something so "barbaric." His word, not mine.

Edward was a good guy, but he was a little full of himself. He was always overdressed to perfection and it wasn't uncommon for him to brag about his aristocratic tastes in Opera, expensive red wines and the classical music he sweared by. Not that there was anything wrong with those things, but the way he addressed them was condescending. He had grown up in a rich family and it showed. He was aware of how intelligent he was and he often showed off with unimportant but none-the-less impressive facts. It annoyed most of the people I worked with, but once you got to know him you realized that it was all an act to cover up a deep seeded insecurity he refused to address.

Edward placed the photo back in his stack before turning his eyes to me again. "Listen, I dropped Jessica from the fashion section and moved her to entertainment news." He looked down at his shoes, a serious expression souring his face. "Her tastes were... unsatisfactory, shall we say. I know I've loaded you down with work, so I'm not asking you to take her assignment but I'd like to you to keep an eye out for somebody to replace the spot." He looked at me, a smirk replacing his frown. "I know you don't like fashion very much, but a strong recommendation from you would help me a great deal." His eyes were hopeful.

"I'll keep an eye out, but..." A name did cross my mind, but it was too early to say. "I can't promise anything. I'll see what I can do."

"Thanks." He stood to leave. "By the way, that serial killer was at it again last night as I'm sure you heard. I think they are finally holding a press conference for the situation this afternoon." I nodded, already planning on attending, despite the lack of desire. "I know. I'll be there."

"Alright. Have a good one, Bella. I owe you lunch sometime." He stepped out, finally leaving me to myself. I laid my head back in the chair and sighed. Today was going to be a long day and I could feel a headache coming on. I popped a few Advil I kept in one of the drawers and turned on my computer to destroy my inbox. Thank God-or-whatever for coffee.

Jacob eagerly invited himself to the press conference, taking my extra badge and throwing it around his neck before ushering me inside of his car. I didn't mind the company, but I really just wanted to get this over with. "Why so glum, Bella?" He buckled in and started the car, pulling out fast and racing down the road before I had time to settle myself. After a few seconds of gripping the car door for dear life, I buckled in, too and looked at him sternly.

"For one, I knew you would drive like an ass," I said wryly. "And two, I wish Edward hadn't dropped this assignment on my lap. I'm not much for writing on murder cases."

Jacob kept his eyes on the road. "Well this one is getting good. Five people killed already and they all were sucked DRY. No blood in the bodies at all. Wicked, right?" He glanced over at me, a boyish grin on his face. "It's like that 'Ice Truck Killer' on Dexter."

I tried to breathe in before responding but I couldn't help it when I snapped. "It's not funny, Jacob. These are people's lives, not some actors and fake dead bodies." I got out my notepad, pen and audio recorder as we approached the conference. Jacob looked like a puppy who had been kicked, mumbling out an apology before getting out of the car and circling around. Before he could open my door, I hopped out myself and walked by. I tried to reason with myself to calm down. Jacob didn't know about my family and he didn't need to know.

We came upon the crowd of reporters after checking in our badges. Jacob was helpful in these situations because he was so big. All I had to do was follow behind him as he moved through the crowd like a brick wall and we could get up in front no problem, people glaring at us from behind. I never liked doing it but he always insisted.

The chief of police stood at a podium, a few local representatives standing behind him. I kept quiet for the most part, letting reporter after reporter ask questions and recording everything, taking small notes here and there.

"How were they killed?"

"How were the bodies disposed?"

"How were they found?"

"What was the murder weapon?"

"What are the steps you're taking to find the killer?"

"Have higher authorities been contacted?"

Too many questions without any solid answers, and it was all... too familiar. Bloodless victims, wounds found on the thigh, the neck, the shoulder, no traceable murder weapon, strange and unidentifiable acidic liquid near the wounds...

I started to feel light-headed suddenly and my vision grew dark, fuzzy black static closing in and blocking my sight. I grabbed Jacob's shoulder to steady myself. "Woah!" He held me up by my arms and looked at me, worry all over his face. "You're pale, are you okay?"

I closed my eyes tightly trying not to faint. "Yeah, but I think I need to leave. Can you finish recording here? I'll take notes on it later."

"Sure, but do you need help to the car?" I could barely hear him as I stepped away, pushing through the crowd with him following carefully behind. My vision returned to me as I went with the more oxygen I was able to take in.

"No," I stopped him, gently urging him back. "I'll be okay," I smiled weakly and kept walking.

When I got to the car I sat in the passenger seat, pushing it back to lay down. You need to get over this some day, Bella...

I knew what I had to do. This was too much for me, and I knew it would be unprofessional but I hoped Edward would understand. I couldn't work on this. It was too much like before... Maybe it was the professional thing. I couldn't look at this objectively. I'd offer to let Jacob take care of it. He was smart and he seemed very interested, so he would certainly keep careful attention on what was going on.

When Jacob got in the car he immediately put the back of his hand to my forehead. "You're not running a fever... You've been working too hard." He pointed a finger, reprimanding me in a gentle tone. "Sorry, Mom." I swatted his hands away and watched as he drove us back.

I later spoke with Edward about my work load, using the excuse that I simply had too much on my plate and that Jacob was more than willing to take the assignment from me. He let it slide and gave me a figurative pat on the head on my way out of the office.

Getting home, I decided to opt out of my usual smoking routine and sat on the couch instead, soaking up my surroundings. The old TV that once was always tuned to ESPN. The photographs of my elementary school graduation, my little league soccer team, one of my mother hugging me in my uniform. The tackle box still sitting in the corner by the front door. Why hadn't I gotten rid of all of this?

I placed a sofa pillow on my head, lying back and making a mental note to go apartment hunting for real tomorrow. As I sunk into the couch, my phone buzzed in my pocket, making me jump. I took it out and peered at the screen. 1 Text Message from Alice Cullen. I sat upright a little quick, the blood rushing in my body making me dizzy. Shit. I opened the phone and read quickly.

You free tomorrow? I have the night off. :)

A small smile fell on my lips and keyed in a reply. Yes, I am. What did you have in mind? It was amazing how fast my mood changed. I waited eagerly for her response, my phone still in hand. Instead of vibrating to tell me I had a text, the phone rang loudly and I nearly fell off of the couch as I answered. Klutz.

"Hey."

"You." Alice's voice traveled through, sounding grainy from the earpiece.

I had no idea what..."What?"

I heard her giggle. "You asked what I had in mind? Oh, never mind. You ruined my fun." I could picture her winking at me with a smirk on her face, that look that always made me shiver from head to toe.

"Oh...ha ha, sorry." I ran a nervous hand through my hair, laying back on the couch with my eyes closed.

"Well, I was hoping I could take you shopping. Or a movie. Or both?" The same uncertain voice carried through the phone and I smiled. Like I could refuse her. I blushed at the thought.

I squirmed in my seat. "I'm not a big shopper, but... Sure, I'd love to."

I heard a dramatized sigh before Alice spoke again. "Oh Bella, you are just silly. I'll make a shopper out of you, just wait and see." Her voice dropped to just above a whisper. "I'd also like to buy you dinner, if you are interested."

Her voice was...husky. I felt a fire roaring in my chest that traveled down my torso and... Oh. "I would really like that." I had to whisper just to get it out, my throat feeling like that of a prepubescent boy. I briefly considered my sanity.

A sigh, this time sounding more like relief, breezed into my ear and sent a tickle down my spine. "Great. When should I pick you up?" The phone beeped to alert me of a text message, nearly muting Alice's voice. Annoyed at the interruption I hit the ignore button, thinking of how I should answer...

"Well," I don't know how, but I managed to keep myself from squeaking into the phone. My voice sounded raw, if anything. I'd settle for that any day over squeaking. "I'm free all day, so whenever is best for you. I was going to do some apartment hunting in the morning."

I took a quick glance around the room again, my eyes catching all of the memories that surrounded me. On second thought... "But I might skip out on that." My voice had turned quiet, and in return there was a curious pause from Alice's end before she responded.

"Hmm, well maybe we can start our date early?"

"Date?" This time my voice did crack a little. Only a little, which is not too bad considering my heart flew up into the middle of my throat and started beating a mile a minute.

Alice laughed softly, her voice dripping with charm. "Well, if you don't want it to be, I'll understand."

I took a deep breath, trying to build up my nerve. I let it out and breathed into the phone, "I didn't say I didn't want it to be." I tried to return the tease but it didn't come out naturally like it came from Alice. If she was just joking with me, I was sure she knew I took it more seriously. God, I'm fool.

I expected an awkward silence and was relieved to instead hear the familiar wind chime that was Alice's soft laughter. "Sorry if I'm coming on too strong, Bella, but I'm sure I'm not the first to have a crush on you." She paused and this time her giggle sounded almost nervous. "Well, can I pick you up at around 4?"

I smiled in relief, blushing like a mad woman. I could feel the heat consuming my face and it burned through me like it never had before. Damn my shyness. "Sure. I'll be ready."

I tried to push back any worries I had about this. I didn't have the slightest clue what these feelings really meant. I hardly knew Alice, but I felt pulled to her. She made me forget everything else around me; she made me forget my anxieties and all of the stress that had settled onto my shoulders.

"Alice," I spoke quietly, a little afraid I might say something silly to scare her off.

"Yes?"

"Thank you."

She was silent for a moment before she responded, just as quiet, "You're welcome, Bella Swan. I'll see you tomorrow." The smile in her voice was evident and my own small smile grew with hope. Hope for what? I don't know.

I said goodbye shyly and checked the text message I had gotten during the call. It was Jacob, obviously excited about the new assignment. I ignored the "Are you okay?" at the end and wrestled the phone into my pocket.. I looked around the house again and stood up and walked toward the photos, trying not to trip over the coffee table. Maybe I would stay here... No point in spending money on an apartment when I could save and eventually get a good place to call my own in Seattle. The drive was beginning to get exhausting. I knew I couldn't stay here forever, but I could at least make this place more comfortable while I was here.

I grabbed a few cardboard boxes and got to work. I packed up all of the photos, the fishing gear, the sports illustrated magazines and then threw the TV in the closet. I'd take that to Goodwill and replace it tomorrow morning... Before my date. I put the boxes with the TV and shut the closet door tightly. I wouldn't throw out the photos. They would just have to hide for a while longer. For now, it was time to move on.