Author's Note: For Volixia667, who wanted to see more pranks by teachers.
Take Five
Severus Snape was not a happy man.
That – that thing had the sheer utter audacity to question him on his whereabouts when he did not turn up at the Great Hall promptly for lunch!
"I was unaware that staff members have to be present at all mealtimes," he had informed her, a customary sneer curling his lips.
"But of course," simpered Umbridge, voice dripping with sugary sweetness. "Those poor little misguided children need to have a semblance of normalcy and family in their lives!"
Between her and Potter, he was actually hard-pressed to choose which one he hated more. Potter may be an insolent brat, but at least Severus was the authority figure. Umbridge, on the other hand… High Inquisitor appointed by the Minister of Magic himself. More like Fudge Fanatic appointed by the Panicking Politician. It even alliterated.
He stirred his cauldron just a little more viciously – Merlin knows he would never ruin one of his precious potions – as his knuckles turned white around the stirrer at the reminder. Almost done.
Corking the vial of potion, he swept off to the kitchens.
"Tippy, I would appreciate it if you can put this in Professor Umbridge's juice during dinner tonight."
Tippy bobbed his head up and down frantically, staring worshipfully up at him. "I is doing it, Master Snape."
"It is a concoction to sooth her cough problems. However, do not tell anyone of this. Professor Umbridge is highly sensitive about her – condition – and would not appreciate my help," Severus warned the little House Elf.
After another round of heartfelt promises, Severus felt safe to leave the kitchens.
That night, he turned up promptly for dinner, ignoring Umbridge's smile of satisfaction. Ah, how he would prove her wrong.
He watched in satisfaction as she took a long draught of her pumpkin juice – and instantly disappeared from view.
"Who did this? Who did this!" her shrill shrieks, however, still emanated from the chair she had formerly occupied.
Severus leant closer to get a better look at the tiny fairy-sized Umbridge waving her pea-sized fist. Ah, the wonders of Shrinking Solution. Pity a Voice Suppressor would have partially neutralised its effect, else he certainly would have given her both.
To his surprise, he noticed that she was sprouting an additional set of gossamer wings. Severus transferred his gaze to the person on the other side of Umbridge. Filius twirled his wand, whistling innocently.