8
Many Changes
They didn't love her.
It came as more of a shock than he might have imagined. She had told him she was adopted, just as he had been adopted, but Kenshin's sister had cherished him. She had played with him when he was a child, educated him, made sure he had all he wanted to eat, always gave him gifts to celebrate the day of his birth. Never a day went by when he didn't get at least one hug and kiss from her. Never a day went by that she didn't say she loved him. Even times when they might have a siblingly quarrel, she never let the day end without those, the most important of all words.
"We're not linked by blood, my brother," she once said to him, "but by love, which is stronger, and unlike blood, everlasting."
A few days passed with Kenshin hiding in the loft of the barn, and he had come to reflect perhaps it was a very good thing indeed that Kaoru's aunt was barren. If this was how she treated such beautiful soul as Kaoru, there was absolutely no need for her to pass her traits on to an offspring.
From the barn, he could hear the old woman's sharp voice when she was outside. She berated Kaoru for being slow, for being clumsy, for forgetting, and piled more chores on what seemed to already be too much work for one person. Never once was Kaoru praised for anything. If she did well, life simply went on without reprimand.
In some ways, her life here seemed to be worse than his lengthy ordeal on the road gang. At least he carried the memory of his sister's warmth and that one special smile she gave only to him. At least he had known that one way or another, it would end. Kaoru had no such comfort.
Yet she was still so lovely, had such an energetic disposition and kind nature, radiating a sweetness and light that her overbearing aunt and indifferent uncle had not been able to tarnish.
This didn't mean they couldn't hurt, her, though. Sometimes he saw the strain in her smile when she snuck in a few minutes in between chores to feed him. If he smiled back, the hurt seemed to fade away, especially the grateful smile he had given her when she brought him a shirt to wear.
But it wasn't until she came to him in tears one late night that the desire to give her comfort became unbearable, and in a moment, he found himself holding her in his arms, his hand stroking her hair and back, and a string of words pouring from him, promises that someday she would have all of the love and happiness she deserved, that a heart such a hers wasn't meant to live forever in this misery and servitude.
And somehow, a custom began between them from this. When she would come to visit him at night, depending on how difficult the day had been for her, she would snuggle into his embrace.
Perhaps it was because she was so starved for affection, perhaps because she had never known the wonderful feeling of being cuddled in another's arms that she didn't find this as indecent as another girl might have. Kenshin never refused her, letting her stay for as long as she wanted. He was deeply in her debt, and he could at least let her find solace from her unhappiness in whatever way he could offer it.
He was surprised and saddened to hear that she had no friends, so seldom was she allowed to visit the town, and busy with work besides. She told him how much she had enjoyed school, which he learned was a place where young people learned to read and write, before her aunt had made her quit.
"Why did she make you stop going?"
"It took too many hours out of the day that I could be spending here, working."
Several foul names for Kaoru's aunt floated into Kenshin's mind before he could quite stop them. Did the insufferable outlander woman have to crush every ounce of her precious niece's happiness wherever she found it?
She asked him what dragons were like, and she was surprised to hear that most of the time they weren't great, lumbering lizards or huge, fanged beasts like the tales most of her people told.
"Most of the time, they look like us," he said. "The forms your people fear so much are the way their bodies can change."
"Change?"
"Yes, they can become bigger, stronger, with greater abilities. These forms are for battle and ceremony, but they aren't used in day-to-day life. I only ever saw my own sister's dragon form a few times."
"Your sister's…?" Kaoru pulled back from him a little, her eyes wide. "K-Kenshin, are you a--?"
"No," he said quickly, grinning. "I am no dragon. I'm just a man. My sister, she--" He hesitated. "She found me in the forest one day, when I was very small. Too small to walk or feed myself, she told me. She wasn't much more than a child herself at the time, but she was all alone. So she took me to her home and cared for me. I've never known anyone as strong and as kind as she was…" Except, perhaps, you, Kaoru-dono.
"Was?" Kaoru said. Her eyes saddened. "Is she gone, then?"
"Yes. New People killed her. They cut her and took her blood because they thought she was a fur drake." His voice was harsh in his own ears.
Kaoru lowered her head with shame. "I'm so sorry," she said.
There was quiet for a moment before she said, "Your sister was another kind of dragon than a beastial one?"
Kenshin shook his head. "She was a hybrid. Half fur drake and half armor drake. There was a time when half-breeds weren't approved of, but now our dragons are so few in numbers than any child is a blessing. But…but because she was a child of two different kinds of drakes, most of the powers of each half were killed by each other. Her body didn't have restorative or lethal properties like full-blooded drakes do. She couldn't even fly. They…hurt her for nothing. Her blood was nothing but her life."
She jumped out of his arms and hugged him in her own instead. Rocking lightly, she cried for him.
Kenshin's eyes were a little wide with the surprise of it. He had been steady when he'd spoken of his sister's death, and yet she cried for him.
How strange she was.
How beautiful.
In a later conversation, Kaoru wanted to know what it was like living in the higher lands. Kenshin told her a little of the village he had lived in when he was young, some of what it was like to live underground, fighting to keep their land, and to protect their dragons from the greed of the Enemies.
"Is that where you want to go when you leave here?" she asked him.
"Yes. I want to fight again."
Kaoru nodded, but her eyes became very sad.
"What about you, Kaoru-dono?" he asked softly, to distract her, shifting a little where she leaned against him. Her weight was putting his leg to sleep, but he would never complain. "What do you want out of life?"
"I want a home of my own," she said with conviction. "I want my own house, my own land. A place like this one, but my own." She smiled wistfully. "My aunt hates it here. She misses the bustle of the city where she grew up before she met my uncle. But I love it here. I think it's beautiful."
You are beautiful, he thought, but could not say.
"Do many of the young men from here court you?" he asked instead.
"No."
"No?" Kenshin exclaimed in disbelief. Were they all blind?
"There are only a few young men here near my age," Kaoru said, "and I can't say I care for any of them. They're all very loud and close-minded. I…want someone who's strong but gentle at the same time. Someone who wants to care for me and let me care for him."
"I hope you find him. You deserve all the good things life has to offer."
She blushed a little, turning shy where she leaned on him. But she didn't move away.
Kaoru's thoughts were full of her Wild Boy as she helped her aunt prepare the evening meal the following night. Already she was thinking ahead to time when she could sneak out to the barn and be with him again. Ham was baking in the oven, and she couldn't wait to take him some.
But in the midst of her enjoyment of his company was a bit of sorrow. His wounds were healing rapidly. Soon he would leave to return to his people, to his fight. She'd never see him again, and her life would be all the more empty without him.
Dinner was silent for Kaoru's family. Aunt Urei wasn't speaking to Uncle Shiji. Whatever his slight was that earned her thunderous silence, Kaoru had no idea. And of course, neither of them spoke to her.
Kaoru preferred the silence anyway, more pleasant than their constant bickering. It was days like these that made her wonder why they had gotten married in the first place. They didn't seem happy together, didn't enjoy any mutual interests, rarely had a kind word for each other.
It was while Kaoru was clearing up after dinner that it happened. Somehow the delicate foreign-painted teapot that Uncle Shiji had given to Aunt Urei for an anniversary gift tumbled from her hands and hit the hardwood floor, shattering into a million sparkling pieces.
Kaoru looked up, stricken, to meet her aunt's blazing, merciless gaze.
"Get the strap," was all Urei said.
"Please, Aunt Urei, it was an accident."
"There are no such things as accidents!"
Desperate, Kaoru looked in her uncle's direction, hoping, just this once, he might intercede.
But it wasn't to be. He turned away as if none of it was his concern, and she was shaking with dread as she mechanically walked into the kitchen and took down the heavy piece of leather that Uncle Shiji used to hone his razor. Her mouth was dry as she went through the motions she knew better than to alter or change in any way. Walking to her room, she lay face down across her bed, her back bared to the waist.
Aunt Urei's voice was cold and implacable. It was only meaningless things she said. "Ungrateful child", "willful", "clumsy" were her favorites.
The strap came down on Kaoru's tender flesh.
"I have done everything I can to give you a good home, and how do you repay me? By breaking an object I treasured with your clumsiness."
The strap came down again, harder this time. Kaoru closed her eyes and bit down on her lower lip, her body writhing in pain as her aunt struck her again and again. Urei's words became a jumble in her ears, any meaning that was left was lost in her tears, in the welts raising on her flesh, in the fire that burned her back.
A cry finally erupted from her throat. Kenshin, he had been brave. He had endured his whipping without making a sound.
She was sobbing when her aunt left the room, locking the door behind her. She wouldn't be able to see Kenshin tonight. That hurt more than anything else.
Kenshin stirred restlessly. Where was she?
He was a little hungry, but much more than he wanted food, he wanted to see Kaoru. There wasn't exactly much for entertainment hiding away in a loft, and he missed her laughter and smile.
He walked across the loft to peer out the window. The house was dark and quiet. Where was Kaoru?
Another hour passed, and still she didn't come.
Impulsively, he climbed down the ladder and padded through the barn. He was about to open one of the big double doors when Shiji entered the barn.
For a moment, the two men stared at each other. Not for the first time, Kenshin cursed his lack of a sword as the other man jerked a rifle from his saddle boot and eased back the hammer.
"Don't move," he warned, his eyes narrowing. "You're that red-headed dragoner boy that escaped from the road gang, the one who killed Kamishi." He chuckled humorlessly. "Wonder if there's a reward posted for you yet?"
Kenshin didn't move or take his eyes from the barrel of the rifle that was leveled squarely at his midsection. Shiji's finger was steady on the trigger, and the slightest pressure would send a bullet into his belly.
"Turn around," Shiji said brusquely, "and don't try anything funny. There's no law against killing Wild People."
Kenshin's eyes wandered past him, to the darkness beyond the barn door.
"Don't try it," Shiji said. "Now turn around or I'll put a slug in your gut. That's a bad way to die, Wild Boy. Could take days."
Kenshin gritted his teeth. If he was just a little further away, he could track the bullet's path and be out of harm's way, but he was too close to try to dodge it without being seriously hurt. As he turned around slowly, he could only hope that Kaoru wouldn't be connected with his being in the barn.
"I'll feed the stock this morning," Uncle Shiji said to Kaoru as she served him his breakfast.
Kaoru looked at her uncle askance, her eyes mirroring her anxiety. "Have I done something wrong?"
"No." Shiji glanced at his wife as Urei took her place at the table. Kaoru felt her insides grow taut as she waited for him to continue.
"I caught a Wild Boy right out in the barn," Shiji said, looking pleased with himself.
"A Wild Boy!" Aunt Urei exclaimed.
"Yes." Uncle Shiji smiled smugly. "That one that escaped from the road gang."
"Where is he now?"
"Still in the barn, tied up. There's nothing for you to be concerned about. I'll ride down and notify the road boss he's here after I feed the stock."
"Good. I won't have a moment's peace until I know he's gone."
No! No, no, no… Kaoru could barely control her breathing. Kenshin was a prisoner again. She didn't think he would be sent back to the same road gang again. He would probably have to face an entirely different punishment for killing Kamishi. They could kill him. They would take him away soon, and she would never know what happened to him.
She fought down all emotions as she cleared up and washed the dishes. Her aunt could never know the Wild Boy meant anything to her.
But she could only think of the barn. He was there, hungry, perhaps hurting. She watched her uncle ride away, trying to think of an excuse that she could invent to go to the barn.
But Aunt Urei kept her busy in the house all morning. Then she heard Uncle Shiji return and knew that any chance of helping Kenshin was gone.
Shiji's face was red and angry when he came into the house.
"What's wrong with you?" Aunt Urei asked.
"The road gang's gone. Neighbors say some kind of sickness overtook the prisoners, and they've all been taken back to their prisons."
"What about the Wild Boy? What are we going to do with him now?"
"I stopped off in town. The police chief's out of town and won't be back until tomorrow. I left word for him to get out here first thing in the morning to collect him."
"He's going to stay here overnight?"
"Well, I'm not hauling him all the way to town. Those Wild People are dangerous." He fixed Kaoru with a stern look. "You stay away from the barn, Missy. I don't want the little savage looking at you. Understand?"
"Yes, Sir," Kaoru answered quickly.
Shiji nodded, satisfied.
It seemed to Kaoru the day would never end. Every time she thought her work was finished, her aunt found a new task for her. On her knees she polished the floor with a block of wax, then was set to work on a large basket of mending, and then the house needed to be cleaned from top to bottom for the company that would be coming over for dinner the following night.
Kaoru hurt. Her back burned and ached, and Urei had no sympathy nor mercy for her. Slowly the hours passed until, at last, the sun began to descended and twilight covered the land. Soon, Kaoru could go to him.
Kenshin cursed whatever laughing fate had brought Shiji into the barn just as he was about to go in search of Kaoru.
Her uncle had struck him across the back of the head with the butt of the rifle, and then, to make certain his prisoner couldn't escape, he'd bound his hands together, secured the end of the rope to one of the cross-beams, and left him hanging there like a side of beef.
He had had just about enough of this undignified treatment at the hands of his Enemies, and had he been one of his sister's people, he would have set fire to this barn and then moved on to blaze the entire town by now if that didn't satisfy him.
His body grew tense as the barn door opened, admitting a draft of cold air. They were coming for him and there was no way to escape.
"Kenshin?"
"Kaoru-dono?" he whispered, surprised and relieved.
He heard her moving in the darkness. "Where are you?" she called softly.
"Here."
Kaoru lifted her lantern higher, her eyes growing wide when she saw him hanging by his wrists from the cross-beam overhead. She placed the lantern on an upended barrel and reached into the basket of food she had brought for him, withdrew a knife.
Placing it between her teeth, she dragged a ladder across the floor, climbed nimbly to the top, and sawed through the heavy rope that bound his hands. He dropped stiffly to his feet, finally free again.
"Thank you, Kaoru-dono," he said, massaging his wrists.
"Yes. I brought food for you."
"Thank you again, but I don't have time to eat. I must go."
"Go?" she said bleakly. But of course he had to go. They were coming for him in the morning.
"I will not forget you, Kaoru-dono," he said, reaching out to touch her cheek. "You have been a true friend to me."
And I have been your only friend, he thought sadly, watching as two fat tears welled in her eyes and rolled down her cheeks. When he left, he would be taking all the kindness and affection he had tried to show her with him, and she would be alone again.
But this was the way it had to be.
"I'll miss you," she said, voice tight with unshed tears. "Be careful."
With a nod, he stepped closer and pulled her into one last hug. It would have to last them both for a long time. He didn't want to leave her, here, in this unhappy life, but there was no other choice. A last look, a lingering caress as his hand brushed her cheek again, and then he started for the door.
"Kenshin, wait." Kaoru ran after him. "Please wait."
Kenshin turned, his heart aching as he read the abject misery on her face, the sadness in her eyes. The night called to him, urging him to get out while there was still time, but he couldn't leave her like this. She had cared for his wounds, provided him with food and shelter and comfort, and had asked for nothing in return.
"Please don't cry, Kaoru-dono," he murmured, enfolding her in his arms yet again. "I can't bear your tears."
Kaoru's arms went tightly around his waist, and the little snuffling sound she made pained him. But, when he drew her closer, she groaned in pain.
"What is it?" he asked, holding her away from him, concerned.
"My back," Kaoru murmured, not meeting his eyes.
"What is wrong with it?"
"My aunt…" Kaoru still wouldn't meet his gaze. "She…she whipped me."
Rage filled Kenshin's soul at the thought of that Enemy woman daring to harm this precious girl. "Shall I kill her for you?" He would do it gladly. She had only to ask.
Kaoru laughed shakily, evidently thinking he was joking until she saw the fierce glint in his eyes.
"No, Kenshin," she said quickly. "No, no. But there is something you can do for me."
"Anything," Kenshin promised.
"Take me with you."
"Kaoru-dono." He whispered her name as he gently drew her toward him once more, pressing his lips to her hair. For one brief moment, he considered doing as she asked. The long journey back to the mountains, or maybe to the hills instead wouldn't maybe seem so long if she were at his side. He would delight in showing her the vast, rolling plains, the beauty of the hills or the snow-capped mountains, the wild flowers that bloomed along the way.
But…
"I would take you with me if I could," he said, "but it would not be wise."
"Please. My uncle will know I helped you escape. They will beat me again."
He was already weakening when she turned away from him and unfastened her yukata, letting the garment slide down her shoulders so he could see her back. "Please, Kenshin?"
He felt sick to his stomach as he gazed at her slender back, now covered with ridges and swollen marks. What kind of woman was her aunt, to treat Kaoru like this? None of his people would ever do such a thing to a child. His sister had never done anything more harsh than smack him on his bottom with a wooden spoon when he had behaved badly as a pup.
Gently, Kenshin drew Kaoru's nightclothes up around her shoulders, his hands lingering on her arms for just a moment before he let her go. Surely she would be better off with him than with a woman who beat her so cruelly.
Kaoru's heart was singing when she turned to face Kenshin, knowing before he even spoke that she had won.
"You need clothes," he said. "You can't travel in just your night garments."
"You'll wait for me?"
"Yes."
Kaoru flew over the ground as she ran back to the house. In her room, she quickly dressed. She had very little in the way of belongings, except an extra kimono and a comb, which she took with her into the kitchen. She took what food she could find, her uncle's skinning knife, and a fresh cake of soap from the pantry.
She was about to leave the house for the last time when she saw her uncle's sword. It was thrust irreverently into a little rack, surrounded by umbrellas.
Her uncle was not much of a swordsman, but he took care of the steel because it had been his father's. She picked it up carefully, amazed that it was so heavy to be so slender. Maybe it would be useful to Kenshin.
When she returned to the barn, Kenshin was waiting with two horses.
"Can you ride?" he asked.
Kaoru nodded. "Here," she said, handing him the sword.
Kenshin's hand caressed the hilt, eyes lighting up in a way that she had never seen before. When he slid the scabbard through his belt, she thought he seemed…completed somehow, like there had been a piece missing from him all along, and she had only just now noticed.
He took her bundle from her and tied the open end closed with a piece of twine before trussing it onto one of the horses. Then he turned to face her, his hands lightly resting on her shoulders.
"Are you sure you want to do this? It's not too late to change your mind."
Kaoru smiled into Kenshin's eyes. She was sure. She wanted to go with him. She wanted to be with him, always. "I will go with you."
With a nod, he placed his hands around her waist, and once again proving he was a great deal stronger than he looked, he lifted her onto the back of the roan. Then he swung atop the other horse, a buckskin, and rode bareback out of the barn. Kaoru followed him, her eyes fixed on his back.
Kenshin held his horse to a walk as they made their way out of the yard. The moon was bright overhead, lighting their path as they rode by he lake and angled their horses down the hill.
Kenshin grinned ruefully as they reached the road he had helped to clear. All his hard work hadn't been in vain, after all, he mused, and urged the buskin into a lope. He looked behind him to check on Kaoru, and felt his heart swell with affection when she smiled at him.
They rode all that night, each mile taking them further from civilization and deeper into the unsettled wilderness that stretched for two hundred miles between Kaoru's hometown of Iyo and Kenshin's mountains.
It was the dark hour before sunrise when Kenshin reined his lathered mount to a halt near the top of a slope. He lifted a trail-weary Kaoru from her horse and gently placed her on the ground, his arm curving around her waist to steady her as she swayed against him.
"We'll rest now, Kaoru-dono," he told her. "Only stay awake long enough for me to spread a blanket for you."
She nodded, and he moved quickly for her, removing the saddle blanket from the roan and spreading it on the ground. He lifted her off her feet, and he was certain she was already asleep before he eased her down on the heavy-woven cloth. He watched her a moment longer, his own body weary from the long ride and the abuse he had received from her uncle, but he wouldn't sleep yet.
Tethering the horses to a nearby tree, he went back over their trail from several hundred yards, erasing all signs of their passing.
The sun was climbing above the distant mountains when he returned to Kaoru. She was sleeping just as he'd left her. Carefully, he stretched out beside her. His shoulder was still sore from Kamishi's bullet, the back of his head ached where Kaoru's uncle had stuck him, yet as he closed his eyes, somehow he had never been more content, or felt more at peace.
Kaoru opened her eyes, stared for a moment in confusion at the sky. Then, in a rush, she remembered where she was and whom she was with. Turning her head, she saw Kenshin lying beside her.
Again, she thought him incredibly handsome. There were no harsh lines around his eyes and mouth when he slept. His hair was so red, falling over one side of his face, and his ponytail hanging over one shoulder.
Timidly, she reached out and let her fingertips touch on the locks at the end of the tail. Her touch was very light, but he woke up instantly, his hand gabbing hers in a grip of iron, the other closing on the hilt of his sword. Kaoru froze, startled by the look in his eyes and swiftness of his reaction.
"Kenshin…I-I'm sorry. I didn't mean to wake you, I just--" She broke off in an agony of embarrassment. What was she going to say, that she wanted to touch his hair? That…just sounded silly.
Kenshin blinked twice, quickly letting go of her hand. "Did I hurt you?"
"No."
His eyes held hers another moment, a little flicker of emotion, something between remorse and amusement, danced across his face. Before she could wonder about it, he said, "What did you bring to eat?"
"Oh! You must be starving," Kaoru said, jumping to her feet, the tension not only broken, but completely forgotten as she rummaged around in her bag.
After a very simple meal, they were riding toward the distant mountains again. They rode all that day across gently rolling land. Once, far in the distance, Kaoru saw a couple of white-tailed deer. Riding on, she saw great hunting birds take wing, soaring with ultimate freedom.
She looked at Kenshin, saw him staring up a little bleakly at those hunting birds. Her own expression saddened. What was he thinking of now? Was he remembering how this land had once belonged to his people? Or maybe how once, the dragons could soar in the sky like that without care, without fear? She almost asked him, but changed her mind at the last moment. Somehow these were thoughts on which she should be intruding…yet.
They paused now and then to rest the horses, and Kaoru found herself awed again and again by the vastness that surrounded them. As far as the eye could see, there was nothing but earth and sky and mountains that never seemed to get any closer. Occasionally she saw a clump of wildflowers, perhaps a stand of cottonwoods near a winding stream, but those were rare. The vastness, the silence, the lack of humanity, made her feel small and insignificant and a little bit lonely even with Kenshin beside her.
Late in the afternoon they came to a small box canyon. They rode single file through the sheer walls, and Kaoru couldn't help a little sigh of pleasure as they came into the canyon itself. It was certainly one of the most beautiful places she had ever seen. Trees grew in abundance, leafy arms reaching toward the sky in silent, never-ending supplication. A small waterfall emptied into a mirrorlike pool that was surrounded by wildflowers and gray-green shrubbery and graceful trees. The grass was ankle-deep, thick and soft beneath her feet. She looked at Kenshin, her eyes alight with the beauty of the place. The air was clear, fragrant with the scent of grass and earth and trees.
Kenshin's eyes were smiling at her, and suddenly she knew he had brought her here on purpose, to show her the breathtaking beauty of his world. She felt her cheeks grow warm as he continued to look at her. Her pulse quickened as he walked toward her, but he only took the reins from her hand and began to unbridle her horse. She watched him, mesmerized by the ebb and flow of his movements, by the way the setting sun fed the fire of his bright red hair.
Turning, he removed the bridle from his own horse, then he took her hand in his. "Come, Kaoru-dono. Let's go exploring."
They walked hand in hand down the canyon, the only two people in the world. Kaoru saw the flowers and trees and rocks and the stream that got its start from the crystal pool, the high canyon walls, the darkening sky, but she was only really aware of the man beside her.
He was so near, her hand trustingly resting in his. Her fingers tingled at his touch, and the heat from his hand seem to travel up her arm and right into her heart. She heard him talk, telling her about the different herbs and plants that grew in the canyon, but the words made no sense. She heard only the sound of his voice, soft and rich, as beautiful to the ear as his form was to her eye.
He handed her a delicate pink flower and she smelled of it, but it wasn't really the flower's perfume that filled her…it was more of his own scent that she smelled. It was most disconcerting. And satisfying.
She was hardly aware of returning to the place where they left the horses. In short time, their camp was set up. Kenshin gathered an armload of firewood, dug a shallow pit, and lit a fire while Kaoru sorted through their supplies to find something for dinner. They ate in companionable silence. A shiver of pleasure skittered along Kaoru's arm when Kenshin's hand brushed hers to take his cup, and she felt again that peculiar singing sensation in the pit of her stomach, a tremor of breathless excitement that washed over her whenever the Wild Boy touched her.
She was aware of his eyes on her face as she washed their few dishes and utensils and put them away.
"It's colder here," she said, suddenly feeling the need for conversation.
He nodded and added more fuel to the fire. His skin glowed like burnished copper in the glow of the flames.
That night he slept sitting up beside her on the blanket, his new sword resting on his shoulder. She was acutely aware of his masculinity, and of her own femininity. She had never been overly curious about the difference between men and women. On her uncle's farm, she had seen the livestock mate, and knew very well such couplings produced young. It would be much the same with people.
Until now, Kaoru had never thought much about marriage or children. She had never met a boy she liked, and she had especially never met a boy she would have considered doing that with. But now…
She put such thoughts from her mind. Kenshin was her friend, and he thought of her as a child, nothing more.
In the morning, Kenshin told her they would spend a few days in the canyon. He had seen deer tracks near the pool, and it would be a good idea to stay long enough to rest and hunt. Warm coats could be made from deer hide, and they could jerk venison for their journey.
Her heart was light. She was free of her aunt's shrewish tongue, free of her uncle's domination. And he was here, her handsome, red-haired Wild Boy. He would protect her and provide for her, and she would likewise take care of him.
She watched as he honed the skinning knife she had thought to bring from her uncle's house, mesmerized by the play of slender muscles in his bare back. The wounds were almost all gone, but as she had guessed had left him with scars. He never complained, not about the pain of the brutal whipping or the wound in his shoulder, and she wondered if any of it still caused him pain. The area around the bullet wound was turning greenish-purple, the scab thick and ugly.
Kenshin ran his thumb along the edge of the blade. The metal was whetted to a fine edge, sharp enough to slice through meat and muscle, strong enough to cut through small branches to make a shelter of sorts.
He spent the day building a three-sided shelter out of long, slender branches from the canyon. Kaoru helped to make a thatched roof out of leaves, and they smiled at each other often as they worked, pleased with their creation, and with the way they worked together, with never a cross word or an angry frown.
It was dusk when Kaoru made her way to the small pool to bathe. Kenshin had gone hunting. She wondered if he would have any luck in finding a deer. Her mouth watered at the thought of fresh venison, a nice change from the bread they had been eating the rest of the time.
Stripping out of her kimono, she waded into the shallow water. Huddling there, she untied her hair and shook it loose, letting the mass of it fall about her shoulders. Glancing around to make sure she was alone, she floated into the pool and began her bath.
She was shivering when she stepped from the water. Drying herself quickly with her kimono, for lack of anything else, she then knelt beside the pool and began to wash the garment, wishing she had something a little better, a little less shapeless and worn-out, to change into.
Kenshin felt his heart slam against his chest when she saw Kaoru kneeling beside the water. His breath caught in his throat as his eyes moved over her in slow fascination. The setting sun cast red-gold shadows over her smooth flesh. Her loose hair cascaded down her slender back.
He wasn't aware of making any noise, but somehow Kaoru sensed that she was no longer alone. Startled, she jumped nimbly to her feet and whirled around, her cheeks flushing scarlet when she saw Kenshin there.
His own face was burning red, but he was paralyzed, murky feelings of admiration mixed with despair traveling from his heart to his stomach and back again. This was no child. No child at all. She was beautifully formed and wonderfully grown. How had he ever thought otherwise?
She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came forth. Kenshin felt the barest ghost of amusement as she belatedly crossed her arms over her chest, her face growing a shade redder.
For an eternity they stood this way, neither able to form a coherent thought. Kenshin's blood was hammering in his ears, burning in his veins. She was more beautiful, more desirable, than he had ever imagined, and he was suddenly filled with many male urges that he had to struggle to rein in.
He wasn't even certain whether he should be ashamed on not as his instincts begged him to take her in his arms. He was sure he was going to die, right here and right now as his gaze lifted to her face. Her eyes were filled with apprehension. Her mouth was slightly parted. A muscle worked in his jaw as he fought to regain control of his emotions. And then, summoning every ounce of willpower he possessed, he turned on his heel and walked away.
It was among the hardest things he had ever done.
Kaoru went suddenly limp, as thought she had been released from some magical spell when Kenshin's eyes left hers. Her heart was hammering wildly, knees weak, mouth dry as dust.
Quickly, clumsily, she pulled on her other kimono, draped the one she had been washing over a rock to dry.
Kenshin…was he all right? He almost looked like he was in pain.
He was sitting cross-legged before the fire when she finally found the courage to return to their campsite. She saw that he had snared a rabbit and had the meat roasting on a spit over the fire, juice sizzling as they splattered into the flames. He didn't look up, eyes shadowed in his long bangs.
It was a silent meal. For the first time, Kaoru was ill at ease with the Wild Boy, not knowing what to say, not certain what had happened between them at the pool, but knowing things would not be quite the same between them again. Her feelings were jumbled and confused, her emotions chaotic. One minute she was light-hearted and happy, and the next she was worried and afraid.
As soon as dinner was over, Kenshin rose to his feet and left the fire. Kaoru watched him walk down the canyon until he was out of sight. Was he angry with her?
She heated the water for the dishes, washed them automatically, her thoughts on Kenshin, always Kenshin. She blushed again, remembering the way he had looked at her at the pool. What had he been thinking?
You know what he was thinking, an inner voice chided her testily. Her cheeks grew hotter still. She had known what he was thinking. Her heart fluttered wildly with the knowledge that he wanted her.
The thought was both frightening and exhilarating. She had felt the surge of disappointment when he turned and walked away. She'd been certain, just for a moment that he might kiss her, and while she knew it was probably very wicked to wish for such a thing, her whole body still ached for him in a way she didn't quite understand.
The sound of his footsteps made her heart beat fast. A sudden shyness washed over her, and she hurried into the shelter and crawled under the covers, unable to face him, afraid to let him see something in her eyes, hear something in her voice.
He didn't sit on the side of her blanket that night, didn't even sleep in the shelter they built together. Instead, he stayed near the fire, staring into the flames. What was he thinking now? What had happened to the easy camaraderie they had shared?
Kenshin looked at the fire, but it wasn't the fire he was seeing. It was Kaoru standing near the pool…
He groaned low in his throat. He had never had time for a woman of his own. He had always been too busy making war against the New People, his only purpose to fight off the horde of Enemies. He had thought of nothing else, wanted nothing else, only vengeance against those who captured and slaughtered his people without mercy, justice for the senseless death of his older sister.
His eyes moved toward the shelter, where Kaoru lay sleeping. In a fluid movement, he stood up and moved noiselessly toward her. He paused in the doorway. His heart beat fast.
Other than Sis, he had never known of such love or affection that Kaoru gave so freely. He remembered the way she nursed his wounds, the way she had cried for his pain. Her tears had been unexpected and surprising, touching him deeply.
A New Person, but not an Enemy.
She stirred, and he saw that she was awake and staring up at him. "Is anything wrong?" she asked, a faint note of alarm in her voice.
"No, Kaoru-dono," he answered thickly. "Go…go back to sleep."
She nodded drowsily, trustingly, her eyelids flickering down again.
Kenshin turned and walked quickly in the direction of a pool. A cold swim had never sounded like a better idea.