CHAPTER 13: LAW OF PERSONIFICATION
"Any concept, force, object, or phenomena may be considered to be alive, to have a personality, to be an entity."
(Whitcomb 15)
Past—Carl's POV
Catholic Mass—liturgy—means a lot of different things for different people.
Carl, being raised in a traditional Italian Catholic family, had been going to Mass for as long as he could remember but nothing had ever truly resonated with him there.
He doubted today would be any different.
He went through the motions of dipping two fingers into the holy water and crossing himself for purification. And then, upon entering, inspiration struck and he wanted to do something more.
Carl separates from his family and walks towards the back of the church. He fumbles in his pockets for some coins and then, after dropping them in the box, he lights a small white candle for Tom Swale—whoever he is.
Was.
When he's done lighting he kneels, fingers entwined, and tries to picture the young man—only without knowing where to start.
He does the best he can do though, and then he stands, dusts his pants off, and glances up at the light streaming in through an angel caught in a stained glass window.
Finished, he goes to find his family waiting for him in the pews.
"Who was that for?" Cecelia whispers at him when he joins them.
He shakes his head and doesn't answer her, pressing a finger to his lips.
The organ starts to play.
The procession began with altar boys leading the way, swinging bells and incense, followed by the priest, Father Paulo.
When they reach the head of the church, Father Paulo turns to the congregation. "Peace be with you." He intones solemnly.
"And also with you." Carl and the congregation reply by rote, then take their seats.
"Let us pray." Father Paulo declares, clearing his throat, "In the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit." He makes the sign of the cross.
Carl surprises himself by repeating that sign, though he doesn't know why. Usually he simply tolerates going to Mass—letting his mind wander for the hour—but today...
Today he's riveted.
He watches carefully as Father Paulo begins reciting the Gloria.
"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to people of good will..."
"Amen." Carl says with the rest when he has finished.
"This is the Word of the Lord." Father Paolo proclaims.
"Thanks be to God." The congregation agrees.
The priest holds a Bible high in the air, then lowers it.
"Today's Psalm is Chapter 19." He begins reading.
"'...Day to day pours forth Speech,
And night to night declares Knowledge.
There is no Speech, nor are there Words;
Their Voice is not heard;
Yet their Voice goes out through all the earth,
And their Words to the end of the world..."
As Father Paulo finishes and steps away from the platform, Carl feels a chill run all the way up and down his spine. He can't explain why.
"The Lord be with you," Father Paulo continues gravely.
"And also with you," the gathered congregation, including Carl, responds.
The priest's assistant stands up and walks to the pulpit to read.
"Our scripture today is from Daniel 10:10-13:
But then a hand touched my knee and roused me to my hands and knees. He said to me 'Daniel, greatly beloved, pay attention to the Words I am going to speak to you. Stand on your feet, for I have now been sent to you.' So while he was speaking this Word to me, I stood up trembling. He said to me, 'Do not fear, Daniel, for from the first day that you set your mind to gain understanding and to humble yourself before your God, your Words have been heard, and I have come because of your Words."
The priest returns from where he had stepped aside.
"Today we will talk about journeys—and about the signs that show we are ready for them. Daniel, called by the Archangel Michael, did not shy away from his holy Summons to serve God in His works. Neither can we."
Is it his imagination or did Father Paulo look Carl square in the eye on that last note?
"And to Abraham the Lord said 'I will bless you...so that you will be a blessing.'
And to Moses God said, 'I will be with you.'
And to Joshua God said, 'For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.'
And to Gideon God said, 'The Lord is with you.'
There is not a one of us that the Lord has forsaken. Our sins are many but our gifts are tenfold. If you give yourself over willingly to Jesus Christ, He will come to you.
Then it is written that the Lord almighty said, 'But get up and stand on your feet; for I have appeared to you for this purpose, to appoint you to Serve.'
Our summons to God's Service was given in our first breath! Even before you left the womb!
In your Lifetime you will have to make choices. And in that time, it is best to remember that the Lord our God is with you always. With Him you will make the correct decision and journey down the path that was set out for you."
Carl is stunned by the sermon. Surely, surely, his talk with Jacob couldn't have been a Divine calling...
..could it?
It's just coincidence... right?
Carl had never believed in coincidences.
"All rise!"
With the sermon over, everyone rose to sing "Alleluia."
Afterwards, with the congregation still standing, Father Paulo leads them through the Apostle's Creed:
"I believe in God, the Father almighty, creator of heaven and earth..."
The organ sounds again, this time with a choir to accompany it. Something is sung in Latin. The ushers make their way down the rows and Carl reaches for his wallet, counting out ten dollars as a tithe.
During this time the altar boys started preparations for Communion.
Carl isn't sure he's ready for this.
The priest's assistant appears from the back of the church. He brings with him a white linen towel, a crystal bowl, and a carafe of holy water to the front of the altar. He proceeds to wash the priest's hands.
Once that ceremony was performed, the items were set aside so the Communion could begin.
"In observing Communion we are remembering Christ and all that He has done for us in his Life, Death, and Resurrection."
Father Paulo holds up a wafer.
The priest's assistant passes to him a silver goblet which the priest also proceeds to hold high in his other hand.
"When we observe Communion we show our participation in the body of Christ. His Life becomes our Life and we become members of each other. We are One!"
"The Body of Christ!" Father Paulo proclaims, placing the wafer in his mouth.
"The Blood of Christ!" He drinks from the goblet of wine.
"Let us pray with the words our Savior gave us:
Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed by thy Name..."
"Amen." The congregation says at the end.
Soon after the prayer a line starts to form as people leave the pews to receive Communion. And again Carl finds himself following the crowd.
When it is his turn to kneel at the altar, Carl does so, falling to his knees.
The priest approaches him.
"Take this bread which represents my body broken for you. Do this in remembrance of me."
The wafer tastes bland.
"This is my blood I've shed for you. Drink this in remembrance of me."
The wine is dry.
Both stir up many memories for him.
Carl sighs.
Dully he makes his way back to the pews and his family, feeling every labored step.
He half-listens to the announcements of what's happening in the community, but later can't recall anything Father Paulo had said.
"Go in peace."
Carl starts from his reverie. Mass is over.
The Procession walks out first, with Father Paulo remaining at the door to say goodbye to each member of his congregation.
Carl's family stands with the rest of the assembly to make their way out of the church but Carl stays behind, kneeling on the padded kneeler, fingers entwined, and forehead resting against them.
His eyes are shut tight but he can feel Cecelia's gaze on him.
"Carl..."
"I'll be fine," he reassures her, still not opening his eyes. "Just give me a minute."
He pictures her nodding and then leaving him to join the rest of his family.
When the church sounds empty, Carl looks up...
And his eyes catch the crucifix.
Closing his eyes again, he does something unheard of for him...
He prays.
What do you want from me?