The next week went by pretty fast, since I spent a lot of time with Sora while Axel was at work. I found a lot of simple things I used to easily do now difficult since I couldn't use my right hand to do anything. I could barely dress myself on my own because my thick cast made it difficult to take off or put on shirts. I also couldn't get my cast wet, so showering was a pain. And it's not like I could ask Axel to help with any of that because…well…that would end my attempt to remain abstinent like he wants. I spent a couple nights at Riku's with Sora since Axel had to pick up some extra shifts, and Sora gave me more tips to try to be the ideal boyfriend for Axel. It was during my second week that I had my first breakdown. Honestly, I'm just happy that I survived a week just fine, but when Axel suggested therapy, I couldn't control myself.

"I've tried it before but it doesn't work."

"But you're trying to change; I think you should give it another shot."

"I don't need another reason to hate myself." I couldn't look him in the eye.

"Roxas, there's no need to hate yourself."

"All therapy is going to do is make me feel guilty about hurting you and it's going to make me hate my dad."

"Don't you already hate him?"

I thought before I shrugged, "I try not to think about my past."

"Roxas, suppressing true emotions isn't healthy."

"Well bringing them out is only going to piss me off."

"Roxas, I think you need the help. Please, for me?"

"How the hell is this going to help you?" I retorted.

"Cause you're the one who admitted that your anger problems is what makes us fight so much!"

"Well I'm sorry I'm not perfect like you!"

"It's not about being perfect Rox, it's about trying to change to be your best!"

"I am trying, I don't know why that's not enough for you."

"When someone is willing to change, they're willing to do whatever it takes to do so."

"Well therapy is my exception."

"No exceptions Roxas!"

"Who do you think you are? My father?"

"Don't compare me to that sick disgusting pig!"

"Well you raped me too!"

Axel turned his hands into fists. "Dammit Roxas I'm just trying to help you!"

"Then stop telling me what to do!" I yelled and Axel sighed.

"Ok," He stood up from the couch and I could hear the bedroom door slamming. I felt bad. My snapping ruined what we had, and I knew I needed to fix it.

"Sorry," I stood in the doorway, watching Axel hold his head.

"Can't you see it Roxas? If we don't do everything to change now, we never will."

I nodded. "Kay."

Axel was quiet; I could tell that between work and me, he was fed up.

"I got to go to work." He stood up and left, and I felt so shitty for ruining his day.

I called Sora. I had no choice. I needed to keep Axel at any cost.

When Axel came home late that night, I was in bed, ready to fall asleep in his arms.

He showered, changed, and got in bed without a word, not even kissing me or acknowledging me.

"Axe?" I turned to see his back towards me as he tried to drift off to sleep.

"M?" he didn't move.

"Can you hold me?" I inched closer to him.

"I'm not in the mood," He sighed. I felt like I ran into a wall.

"Can I hold you?" I figured as long as I could feel him, it'd be enough.

"Do whatever you want."

I was so hurt and felt so rejected, but I wrapped my good arm around his waist and positioned my body to form right against him.

"I love you," I said into his shoulder.

He exhaled loudly through his nose, rolled over, and put his arms around me. "I love you too. I just, I just want to help you, and it'd help ME if you tried listening without getting so defensive and jumping to conclusions."

"I'm sorry."

"Just, try and think about it and at least consider therapy? Please?" Axel sounded so drained.

"Thursday."

"What about it?"

"My first therapy session is on Thursday."

"You...you signed up?"

"Yeah, right after you left. I have it twice a week, starting Thursday. I scheduled them for when you have work and it's close enough so I can walk, which can give me some alone time to calm down if I need it." I finished and Axel went silent for a while.

"I'm really proud of you Roxas. Really proud."

"Thanks," I didn't know what else to say.

"Let's get some sleep," Axel rubbed my back as I fell asleep in his grasp.

A few weeks later, my cast was off, therapy was going better than I expected, and day by day, Axel seemed to be getting happier because we hardly ever fought, and never as badly as we used to.

"Good morning," he came up behind me as I was washing dishes and held me. I leaned my head back against his chest, so completely satisfied. "Good morning." I smiled.

"How are you feeling?" He asked and I shrugged.

"Yesterday's session was rough but I feel better that I got it off my chest."

"Good. What smells so delicious?" Axel sniffed by my neck, tickling me and making me giggle.

"That's the pie," I wriggled as he held onto my hips.

"Oooh, you're making pie?"

"Yea, for the party today."

"Oh good, Demyx and Xigbar should be here soon. Sora and Riku are coming, right?"

"Yeah, Sora said they already left Riku's."

"Ok. Damn that smells yummy, just like my Roxy." Axel constricted me with his arms and I laughed as I failed to break free.

He spun us around, pinned me against the fridge, and pinned my shoulders. He smashed his soft warm lips roughly against mine. He slid one leg between mine, pressing forward with his hips. As he pressed with his hips, he shoved his tongue in my mouth. I moaned into the kiss, thrusting my hips, slightly up into his, till he pushed us apart.

"Fuck me," I whispered.

"What?" He caught his breath.

"Fuck me Axel. Please? Fuck me good and hard," I begged, putting my hand on his chest but he shoved it aside.

"No sex, remember?"

I got angry. "Then why the fuck did you make out with me like that?"

"I wanted to reward you for going so long and doing so well."

"All you did was tease me!"

"I'm sorry, I was just trying to encourage you."

"By making me hard and then refusing me?" I smudged my lips free of his taste.

"I said I'm sorry. Next time I just wont kiss you then." He crossed his arms.

"Why cant we just make love? I've gone so long without sex and I've done my very best to be as good as I can," A month without sex or cheating on Axel was a personal record. A month without making out or groping was also a record. I didn't know what more he could ask of me.

"I know you are, and you're doing great."

"Then how much longer do I have to wait for you to trust me?"

"It's not a matter of time, but proof."

"What does that even mean?" I was getting impatient.

"I don't know when the time will be right, but when it is, I'll know."

"I'm tired of waiting Axe!" I whined.

"You're doing great, don't give up."

"Axe, I'm already so hard it hurts, please!" I put my arms around his neck, started nipping at his collarbone, even started swaying my hips into him, tapping my boner into his growing one.

"Roxas," He moaned, trying to push me away despite the pleasure I was clearly giving him.

I put one hand over a hard nipple, and one over the base of his stomach. "Rox, stop!" He pushed me and I fell back against the fridge, my head throbbing a little.

"No more Roxas. No more," He walked away to the backyard and I went to the bathroom to get Tylenol and to get rid of my erection all alone. When I finished and went outside, everyone was already there. I knew I had to work hard to win over Demyx and fucking Xigbar, but if it would prove to Axel that I had changed, I'd do it. I said hi to everyone and then went back in to get some water, when Axel came up behind me.

"I'm sorry I pushed you." He held me and I remained still. I was angry. I wanted to yell. Wanted to cry and hit him for being so cruel to me as to turn me on and reject me. The old me would have thrown a fit and ran off. But now, I needed to make this work.

"I'm sorry I pressured you." I said, putting my arms around him, but not firmly.

"I love you Roxas. I just want to believe that you aren't addicted to sex."

"I know." I said, breaking the hug to go back outside with Sora and to leave Axel alone.

"Long time no see," Demyx waved and I nodded with a smile.

"Axel said you've changed; you already look less like a bitch." Xigbar said and I could see Sora boiling up.

"Um, thanks," I rubbed the back of my neck nervously, trying with all that's inside me to not explode.

"He's absolutely amazing. He's come a long way and I'm really proud of him." Axel held me from behind and I smiled up at him, unable to be mad at him when he says he's proud of me.

"You two seem really and sincerely happy. Good for you." Demyx flashed an adorable smile of his and Axel squeezed me.

"I love you." I looked up to tell him.

"I love you too," he kissed my temple and Demyx let out an "aww how cute!"

"They're so happy together now, you can see a complete turn around." Riku said as he pulled Sora in his lap.

"Thanks guys." I sat on the armrest of the chair that Axel was in as we all sat in the backyard, talking and hanging out for a while when my timer for my Lemon Meringue pie went off.

"Woops, excuse me," I got up and went into the kitchen. I was about to plate the pie when I noticed that Demyx was there too.

"Oh, hey," I said, he totally caught me off guard.

"Look Roxas, I'm really happy for you and Axel, but if this all turns out to be a lie, I'll never let you near him again. Got it?" His deep blue eyes intimidated me as I nodded.

"I'm glad that Axel has a friend like you to care about him." I said, trying not to piss him off.

"Thanks. Again, I want to believe this is all real and will last, but for your sake, it better." He turned around and went outside when Sora came in.

"Need help?"

"No, I'm fine," I don't know why Demyx's threat bothered me as much as it did, but I was a little shaky.

"Ok," Sora shrugged and I carried the desert outside.

"Wow, that looks good." Riku rubbed his hands together.

"Good job baby," Axel stood behind me and put his hands on my hips.

"Thank you." I cut through the pie and served everyone.

"This is amazing," Demyx smiled and I smiled back nervously.

"It's really good." Xigbar nodded.

"Better than mine," Sora said with his mouth full.

"It's perfect babe," Axel scooped some up on a fork and extended it to my mouth. I let him feed me, before I fed him mine, and when we finished, we noticed that everyone was staring at us.

"This is like, too good to be true." Xigbar announced.

"Like a miracle," Demyx agreed.

"People can change for those they love." Riku stood up for me.

"And do I love you," I looked at Axel, who cupped my face, kissed my lips softly, gently kissed my nose, and brought our foreheads close enough to touch.

"Oh My God! Why don't you do cute stuff like that with me?" Demyx complained to Xigbar.

"Yeah!" Sora chimed in and Riku shook his head.

"Never did I think I'd ever try to role model my relationship after Roxas' and Axel's."

I couldn't help but laugh. He had a point.

"We're just amazing like that." Axel smiled and I did too. After about another hour, the party began to die down.

"I really am happy for you two." Demyx said as he and Xigbar went out the door. As he got in the car, the blonde faced me and winked, and I gulped, remembering his threat.

I hugged my twin and Riku goodbye and once Axel and I were all alone, I started to pick up the mess.

"Let me do it." Axel stopped me from cleaning.

"I got it," I continued, but he put his hands firmly on my shoulders.

"Roxas, let me do it."

"Why?" I couldn't help but wonder why he pressed the matter so much.

"Because you were amazing today and handled everything so wonderfully, you deserve to rest."

"I don't mind cleaning. It makes me feel like I have a purpose here."

"What do you mean?" Axel tilted his head to the side.

"You work and I don't do anything. I like cleaning because it makes me feel like I can help you."

"You are helping me. The Roxas you've been for the past month is wonderful, and you deserve to know how much I appreciate that." Axel put his hands on the small curve at the bottom of my back.

"All I need is to see you smile, and I know it's worth the work." It sounded so cheesy, but it was true.

Axel chuckled with a smile. "I love you so much."

"I love you too Axe."

He exhaled, trying to relax. "Tell me this is real, Rox. Promise me that this will last."

I nodded. "It's real Axe, I promise. We can make this last." I hugged him and he let his chin fall on my blonde spikey hair.

"Do we have any Lemon Merengue pie left?"

"Yes, want me to get you some?"

"No I can get it. Can you do me a favor though?" He breathed heavily on my ear.

"Anything." I said, shaking.

"Wait for me; in bed." He said with a husky voice, as if he were trying to seduce me. Trying, and succeeding.

"In bed? It's only 8 pm; what do you mean?" I stood unsure of what he meant.

"Use your imagination." Axel slid his palms under my pants, under my boxers, and down my ass, squeezing extremely hard, jolting my hold body in his touch.

I twitched mercilessly. "Please don't tease," I wanted to cry.

"It's not a tease." Axel removed his hands, freeing them in order to remove my shirt. He licked my nipple, and I shook with pleasure that I'd been having with-drawl's of.

"Go wait for me, in bed," he unbuckled my pants, turned me around to face the direction of the bedroom, and gave me a spanking.

I obeyed without hesitation, entering the bedroom, stripping completely, picking out a pair of his boxer briefs, and putting them on. He always found it sexy when I would wear his underwear, and I liked knowing where it had been. I laid on the bed, on my side, one leg bent up, the other stretched out. Then, he walked in. He was naked, but covered in Lemon Meringue from his nipples to his cock. Fuck was I hard. He posed against the door after he shut it behind himself, leaning on one leg, hands on hips.

"Like what you see?" Axel teased me by rubbing his hands down his pecs and abs, covered in yellow pie goo that smelled irresistible.

"Yeah," I moaned, mouth hung open, tongue subconsciously hanging out.

"Want to taste it?" he ran his tongue over his palms and I sat up, spreading my legs out wide to show him my erection.

"Yeah," I moaned again, clawing the bedding as I tried to pace myself.

Axel grinned, threw his body off of the door, and strode up to me confidently.

"And you love me?"

I nodded.

"You wont ever cheat on me again?"

"Never again," I pleaded, wanting to taste Lemon-flavored axel.

"How far are you willing to go to prove it?" Axel bent over the bed. His hands planted on the bed right by my hips, his eyes leveled with mine, his cock hard and dangling so dangerously close to mine.

"What?" I felt like my mind had already been taken over by excitement.

"How much do you love me Roxas? How far are you willing to go to prove that you aren't addicted to sex?" I finally heard Axel's words for what they were, and I wanted to cry. I knew the answer he was looking for. I knew what he was trying to prove. He wanted me to resist him. To show that I wasn't a sex addict. To show that I could control my body.

"You said this wasn't a tease!" I pounded my fists on the bed.

"It's not. I'll fuck you if you want, but I want you to think about how much you want this to work, and how hard you're willing to work to make us work."

I snarled, angry, frustrated, horny, impatient, trying with all that I am to not yell, hit, cry, cuss, and go wild.

"You, you want me to say no." I said, hanging my head down, closing my eyes, unable to look at his gorgeous body, knowing I had to refuse it.

"I want you to say what you want." Axel didn't move a muscle.

"I want, I want," I wanted to cry. Fuck. "I want to have sex with you. I'm so hard and I've gone so long without any kind of pleasure."

I could hear Axel breathing like he was disappointed, heavy and unsure.

"But, I want us to last more than I want to be fucked," I said, looking up, crying.

Axel's eyes lit up and I kept sniffling. "You really mean that?" Axel kept his gaze in my eyes.

I nodded. "Yeah." I started crying, not just because I had just turned down sex, but because I felt so stupid for being so horny and for being so desperate.

"I'm so proud of you Rox," Axel put his hand on my cheek but I brushed it off. I didn't want to talk to him and I couldn't look at him without wishing he'd shut up and fuck me, so I ran to the bathroom and locked the door behind me. I cried as I pumped myself, sobbing as I tried to come into the toilet, screaming in emotional pain as I did.

"Roxas, Roxas, open the door." Axel pounded, but I just kept crying as I sat on the cold tile floor.

"I cant," I sobbed.

"Why not?"

"Cause," I rubbed my eyes.

"Cause why Roxas?"

"Cause I cant look at you naked without getting hard. Please Axe, this is so hard for me. Please," I begged, not knowing what I was begging for; maybe for some slack, some break from all the temptation.

"Roxas, I want to make love to you. Please, open the door."

"What?" I asked.

"I told you I wasn't teasing. I want to make love to you, but I cant if you don't open the door."

I threw open the door and started shaking as I cried. "Why did you ask me those fucking questions then?"

"I wanted to know that you really love me Roxas. More than you love sex. More than the adrenaline rushes you look for in such unhealthy ways. More than cheating on me." Axel put his hand back on my face, and I put my hand over his.

"I do love you Axe. If I didn't I wouldn't be trying so hard to make you happy." I wanted to press my body against his, but after all that was done and said today, I couldn't afford to get excited to end up coming in the fucking toilet again.

"You do make me happy. But cheating on me, as much as you did, as often as you did, as carelessly as you did, that hurts Roxas. That leaves scars that may never fully heal." Axel pressed his forehead against mine and I sniffled.

"I'm sorry Axe. I'm really sorry." I griped his neck tightly with my arms, thankful that he was bending over a bit so I didn't have to go on my tip-toes.

"I know you are. But being sorry doesn't necessarily heal those wounds." Axel squished our bodies together, and I could feel the Lemon Meringue mixing between our skins.

"I'm sorry," was all I could say.

"My heart is so broken over what you did to me, I keep trying to tell myself that I've moved on, but honestly, I don't know if I can." Axel broke the hug and stepped back, hand on head.

"Please Axe, I'm begging you." I reached out my hand for his, but he shook his head.

"This just doesn't feel right anymore." Axel stepped back several more times, not even looking at me.

"Axel, Axel please!" I took a shaky step towards him but he turned his back to me.

"I'm sorry Roxas. I just can't do this anymore. I can't keep lying to myself, telling myself that I'm happy, when deep down inside, my heart is just too broken." He stood with his back towards me, turning his neck slightly.

"No, no Axe please." I shook my head, weeping uncontrollably.

"Maybe we just aren't meant to be?" Axel looked down at the ground.

"No! Axel don't say that! We worked so hard to make it here, we can keep working. Please Axe, give me another chance!"

"I've given you plenty of chances Roxas! I've given you so many "second chances" that I lost count. I don't even know how many times you cheated on me, or with how many guys! I can't keep risking my heart like this. I'm sick of it!"

"I can change! I've already changed! Please, I'll keep working, I'll do anything!" I sobbed, my eyes so full of tears all I could see was his white skin and red hair.

"It's too late Roxas. You should have changed a long ass time ago." Axel brushed past me so he could be alone in the bathroom.

"No! Axel! Axel!" I screamed, my voice cracking as I screeched his name, my fists pounding on the locked door as I heard the shower running. I collapsed against the door, crying with all the anger, frustration, sorrow, and regret I'd ever had.

When Axel finally opened the door, all that was left were the silent tears as I looked up from the floor.

"You can have the bed tonight. I'll call Sora tomorrow, and he can come get you and your things." Axel stepped over my body in his boxers and a T-shirt as I crawled after him, still naked.

"Please Axel! I swear, I'll change. I'll do anything. I'm begging you!" I held onto his leg, on all fours, never so desperate in my life.

"I've had enough of this Roxas."

"Don't say that. Please, don't say that."

"I've…" Axel sighed heavily, as if he were debating his next words. "I've had enough of you." He shook me off his leg and shut the bedroom door after he left. I curled up on the floor, and cried the entire night.

Author's Note: SO this chapter, as you probably noticed, is a lot longer than most of my chapters, and its because I will not be able to post tomorrow since I will be at Disneyland all day! So yea, sorry that I cant post tomorrow, hopefully this long chapter suffices, and remember, I have plenty else for you to read in the meantime ^_^

About this chapter, man, talk about drama and tension! If you've read any of my stories, or hopefully at least a few of them, then you know that i LOVE drama and intense situations. So yeah, there is a lot more coming up ahead in this story, so PLEASE track it and me so you can get your fix of Akuroku yaoi!

Thank you for reading!

Heart, Sarabellum