A/N: Once again, you guys amaze me. Thanks so much for all your wonderful reviews!!! I love each and every one of them. A few administrative notes: 1) I have a contest entry in the MissAlex's and Larin20's Stache Riders OneShot Challenge, which celebrates all things Chief Charlie Swan. Mine is called "For Now," and there are other great ones entered, so head on over and cast your vote!! fanfiction (dot) net/~stacherider 2) I have a new fic up, my first Jalice one, called "Little Sister No More." I only have the prologue up so far, but it's going to be a lot of fun, so check that out if you love Jasper and Alice as much as I do!!! 3) Thanks so much to all of my BFFF'ers for being fuckawesome!!! I love you ladies!!!!

Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight. Aww shucks.

Crashing Head On

Chapter Fifteen

BPOV

The Mothers left when the weekend was over, and Emmett and I fell back into our previous routine over the next month. Emmett was getting better and stronger each and every day, and we were getting closer each day, both emotionally and physically, as cheesy as that sounds.

But it wasn't enough anymore. Physically, my body was aching for his, and no matter how desperately we kissed, we were both left unsatisfied and unhappy with the final results… which were, well, nothing.

I wanted to get my hands on him. I was dying for that moment. There were times when I thought it might happen, when I thought that he might let me, but then he was tired from his waning medications, and we had to stop. I hated those moments. I just wanted to make him feel good! And, of course, it was totally selfish, too. The man was simply too sexy for words.

The other thing that was eating away at me was the love I felt for him. I wanted to tell him so badly. Sometimes it was all I could do to not breathe out the words between kisses, or when I fell asleep by his side each night. Now that I realized how I felt, it was torture not telling him. The Mothers had squealed and were half-planning the wedding before I even got the sentence out. Renee still called me every day to see if I had broken and told him how I felt.

But I wasn't sure if we were ready for that step. Despite his reassurances that he was a one woman man, and the fact that I trusted him whole heartedly, I was still terrified that once he healed completely, he'd realize that I was just the warm space in his bed and he'd forget all about me.

It hurt to think that way. I knew Emmett wasn't like that, deep down, but Edward's parting words with me haunted me. I hated that he had that power over me still. I wanted to be strong enough to forget all the things he'd said to me.

I was laying next to Emmett, reading an article on my laptop for class in the morning, when he muted The Colbert Report suddenly.

"Do you want more?"

I looked up from my computer. "Huh?"

"Is this enough for you? Am I enough?"

I snapped my laptop shut, and sat it aside. I turned completely towards Emmett, concern stretching across my face. "What do you mean?"

"I'm… me. I'm broken, literally. And well, I can't exactly please you the way I want to… the way you deserve."

My eyes were wide with surprise. "Emmett! That doesn't matter! I don't need a sex maniac. I need you." I stroked his cheek, trying to reassure him. "I want all of you, no matter how you come."

He traced my lips with his fingers. "I want to be everything for you," he said simply, and my heart skipped a beat.

"You are," I whispered. "I…" The words threatened to spill out. I was going to put a damper on them, but then I saw the hope in his eyes. The adoration, the affection, the… dare I hope it?, the love reflecting in his gorgeous eyes. "I love you," I breathed.

My heart raced as I waited for his response. I felt like I was going to explode with the anticipation of his next words. I prayed I hadn't misread the look in his eyes. The mere thought of his rejection was paralyzing. I licked my lips nervously, anxious for his reaction.

"I love you, too," he finally declared, and I sighed in relief and joy and amazement. "I love you so much, Bella."

I held back an errant sob that had worked its way up my throat. I couldn't believe he loved me back. It was unreal. I felt like the luckiest girl in the world.

And before I knew it, my hands were in his hair, and our lips were smashed together in a reckless and passionate kiss. Considering we had just declared our love for each other, it probably should have been tender and sweet, but this kiss was just like us in this moment; needy, desperate, and eager. Somehow, the anger and hate we'd felt for each other before translated to passion, and when hate was turned to love, we still had that incendiary reaction.

I had no idea how long we'd kissed, but it felt like an eternity. I wasn't complaining, and neither was he. It was taking everything I had in me to not straddle his lap and have my wicked way with him. But that was simply impossible. I couldn't hurt him like that.

I whimpered in displeasure when he wrenched his mouth away from mine.

"Bella, I need you," he groaned. He was panting for air, and I found that I was, too.

"I need you, too," I sighed, rubbing my legs together for friction.

His hand cupped my left breast, running his thumb over my nipple. My back arched against him, needing to be closer. "Em," I moaned, "so good. I wanna make you feel good." I ran my hand down his abs and just along the edge of his pants so he got the hint.

He groaned, which was a masculine, deep sound that made my stomach flip and my legs to rub together even harder. I raised up his shirt so I could feel the texture and contours of his muscles. It was a given that they weren't as defined thanks to his time in bed rest, but the man was still built, and he felt simply marvelous against my palm. I kissed down his chest, brushing my fingers lightly around his nipples and hearing him hiss, down his stomach until I reached the V of his hips. I wanted to run my tongue along the grooves, but Emmett had other plans, tugging me back up to his face. He kissed me again, and my fingers played with the strings of his pajama pants, toying with them, teasing him.

"What are you up to?" he asked after he pulled away again.

"I was going to ask you the same question," I said, cupping him through his pants and feeling him harden beneath my palm.

He let out a choked bark and raised his hips so they were closer to my hand without lifting off the bed. I untied his pants and pulled them down his hips.

Holy FUCK! He was… I mean it was… Well, let's just say, everything about Emmett is massive. I bit my lip with concern, wondering briefly how he would fit inside me when the time came for that. I shook my head, bringing myself to my present concern, which was making him feel good.

Emmett caught me staring, and gave me one of his famous shit-eating grins that I loved so much. I licked my lips exaggeratedly, and he burst into laughter. I may have joked about it, but really, I just wanted a taste.

"It's all for you, baby," he said, and I let a pathetic little whimper escape at that thought. I felt greedy, and I couldn't help it.

"Can I…?" I started to ask, feeling suddenly shy. I wanted to devour him, almost literally, but suddenly it felt real like it never had before. I mean, his cock was right there, erect and ready for my hands, my mouth… wherever else…

"Only if you want to," he said quickly. "I'm not gonna ask you do anything you don't want to, if you don't want it's OK, I'll be fine…"

"Oh, I want to," I said huskily, and took him into my hand for the first time.

"Oh, shit," he moaned as I stroked him from base to head, and back down again. I tightened my grip, and he whimpered again.

I had never felt more powerful, more feminine before in my life. Emmett kept moaning my name, over and over, his eyes tightly shut. "More," he kept begging. And I would give him more. I kissed him as I increased my pace, and he gripped my hair tight in his hand, but not painfully. I could feel him tensing, but I wasn't quite finished with him yet.

I pulled away from his lips, kissing his jaw, down his neck and chest, all the way down to his hips. I ran my tongue across that glorious and damned V I'd been fantasizing about since that first sponge bath, and then, once I was sure his eyes were rolled up into the back of his head, closed my mouth around him, darting my tongue out to swirl around the ridge of his cock.

The reaction was almost immediate. I looked up at him as I watched his eyes pop open with surprise, staring down at me with amazed, wide eyes. I ran my tongue up and down his length, running my fingers along the places I missed or didn't fit. It wasn't long before his hands were tugging on my hair, trying to lift me off of him.

"Bella, oh God, I'm gonna… You don't have to…"

I ignored him and sucked around him hard, wrapping my hands around his length as I concentrated on the head. I felt him tighten, and with a curse, Emmett spilled into my mouth. I swallowed around him, neither loving nor hating his taste. When he finally stilled, I pulled away, giving the tip of his head a tiny kiss and pulled myself up.

He was staring at me utterly gob smacked. He looked sated and a little bit like the cat who ate the canary, but I could tell that I shocked him.

"You didn't have to do that, baby," he said quietly. He reached out for my hand, and I gave it to him.

"I wanted to," I said simply. And it was true. It had been a decision made in the heat of the moment, but I wanted to do it. I wanted to be close, intimate, with him.

"I love you so much," Emmett said, kissing my palm. "And not just because you did that… although, shit, that was fuckhot!"

I winked at him. "Any time, my love."

"C'mere," he said, and pulled me so that I was hugging his good side. I snuggled into him, placing kisses along his jaw. He shivered when I used my teeth. "How are you?"

"Fine," I said absentmindedly, working on a love bite on his chest.

"No, I mean, how are you? If you're anything like me, you need a little help, too."

"I- what?" I honestly didn't know what he meant.

"Jesus, Bella! Are you horny? Do you need release?" He stared at me as if it should be obvious.

"Well, yeah, but that's not really a possibility right now…"

He silenced me with his fingers against my lips.

"Can I help?"

"I don't really see how…"

He smirked. "Do I need to draw you a picture?"

"What?"

He gestured towards his mouth. "If you come on up here I can lend you a hand… or my tongue…"

To say that I was soaking wet from his suggestion was an understatement. My jaw dropped in surprise, but my body quivered with the mere idea of his mouth anywhere near me.

"I… I…" I stuttered, unsure how to respond. My body was screaming Hell yes! but my brain was just a little freaked out. "No one's ever done that for me before," I said honestly.

"Are you kidding me?!" he exclaimed. "How could you not… I mean, how could they have not… Not that I want to think about other guys… but I mean, seriously, you're you and so sexy and I just can't…"

I held my hand up to his lips, quieting him. I laughed.

"Emmett, you're mumbling."

"I'm sorry, I just can't fathom it. I've been dying to since I met you."

I know I blushed then. He grinned at me, confirming my suspicions. "Maybe another time," I said softly. I wanted to… I wanted him to… but not yet. I wasn't ready.

"Alright, my love," he said, and my heart thrilled at hearing him call me 'love.' I would never grow tired of hearing it. I kissed him, forgetting that he would be able to taste himself on my tongue. Apparently, so did he, because he kissed me tenderly, deepening the kiss infinitely.

"I love you," I moaned as he kissed my neck.

EmPOV

Bella fell asleep not too long later. My girl could fall asleep any time and any place, and I wanted to join her, but my head was swimming with thoughts of her.

I couldn't stop thinking about how she pleasured me. I felt embarrassed, cumming so quickly after she put her mouth on me, but I couldn't help it. She made me feel like a 15 year old virgin. As it was, it was all I could do not to explode the second she even touched me. I know it was partially because I'd been sex starved, even from my own hand, for quite a long time now, but it also had something to do with her.

I couldn't believe she'd never been pleasured that way before. The very idea that I could be her first at something had me hardening in my pants.

Bella set me on fire and it killed me to know I couldn't help her the same way she could me. I wanted to, but I could sense her hesitancy. I didn't want to push her, no matter what I wanted. She deserved the best. I knew I wasn't the best, but I had to try. I loved her too much not to.

I sighed, and watched her sleep. She mumbled my name, and curled into me further. My heart skipped a beat like I was a fucking teenaged girl. But damn it, Bella made me react that way, I couldn't help it. She was so beautiful… and she was mine. I couldn't believe she loved me back. I hadn't even try to hold out hope that she could or would.

But she did. My Bella, the miracle I held in my arms, loved me back. I wanted to gloat, shout out to the entire world, or, at the very least, Jasper, that I loved Bella and she loved me back and we had finally advanced our relationship some, though only by inches. It was better than nothing, I told myself, and later, when I was healed, we'd finally be equals and I could show her just how much I loved her. Instead, sleep found me, and I feel asleep in her arms, and she in mine.

The next morning, I awoke to find Bella gone. She was in class, I knew, but I was sad that I never woke up with her next to me. Even on the weekends, Bella was an early riser and she was usually cooking breakfast or reading a textbook when I awoke. The sheets besides me were cold, as she'd been gone for a few hours now, but her pillow still smelled like her coconut shampoo.

She had left a note on said pillow this morning.

Good morning, baby. You looked so cute sleeping, I really wish I could wake up next to you. One of these days… Maybe you'll exhaust me with your lovin' so much I won't have a choice but to sleep in. *wink* Remember, you have a doctor's appointment this afternoon. I'll be home early, and Jasper's coming by to help out, too. I love you, baby. I'll be home soon. Bella.

Damn it. She knew exactly how to arouse me… and then kill it. The doctor. Great.