I woke up the next morning, my head slightly buzzing, and I noticed that I was still sleeping in between Rude and Reno. I smiled as I snuggled into the warmth that the two provided. Rude was awake and snuggled closer to me, which I found funny since he looks pretty intimidating, and Reno mumbled in his sleep.

"You ok kid?" Rude asked and I nodded as I turned to face him.

"Better. Thanks."

"Yeah." Rude rolled on his back and sighed before he got out, his white T-shirt hugging his broad chest.

"Rude!" Reno whined when Rude dragged the blankets off with him.

"Hm?"

"Cold." Reno mumbled, eyes still closed.

"Get up." Rude kissed Reno's lips and left the room while Reno sighed.

"Guess it's time to rise and shine, right blondie?" Reno stood up and I got up as well. "How'd you sleep?"

"Comfortable. Thanks for taking me."

"No problem. I found your twin too and let him know, so he wouldn't worry."

"Thanks. Sora must have really appreciated it."

"He seemed thankful. Anyway, Axel's probably really hung over. Lord knows I am." Reno sighed as he put a hand to his head. "Rude!" He yelled and Rude came back in black pants and a different white shirt.

"What?" Rude came in the bedroom.

"My head hurts. Give me an aspirin?"

"Sure." Rude left and came back with some pills and water. "Do you want some?" Rude asked me and I nodded.

"Thanks."

"Alright, I'm going to go talk to Axe; stay here alright?" Reno got up and tripped, lucky that Rude caught him.

"I'll drive." Rude rolled his eyes.

"Yea yea, whatever." Reno rolled his eyes

"Maybe you should stay, with me?" I suggested. I hardly remembered the conversation that Reno and Rude had last night in bed, but I feel a connection to Reno that I cant describe.

"That's probably a good idea." Rude said and Reno nodded.

"I'll be back." Rude left as Reno and I sat on the couch and watched TV with nothing better to do.

"How are you feeling?" Reno asked and I scooted over to him.

"Hurt." I said.

"Want to talk about it?" Reno offered to listen and I shrugged.

"I feel so bad for what happened last night, but I know it's not my fault. And I'm hurt. My head hurts, my ass hurts, and my chest hurts." I put my hand over my heart.

"Come here." Reno held out an arm and I moved into it. "You need to know that you didn't do anything wrong last night. What happened to you never should have happened, and you didn't deserve what Axel said or did either." Reno rubbed my arm and I nodded.

"Thanks Reno. You really do help me when no one else can." I smiled.

"Thanks kid. I want Axel to be happy, but I know that he has a tendency to jump to conclusions and assume the worst in people. From the moment I met you, I could tell that you were harmless. You just wanted someone to care for you and notice you." Reno said and it got me thinking.

"I guess I want that. My mom hated me, my dad used me, and all along, I wondered if I was ever worth keeping. Axel didn't deserve what I did to him, but I just needed to find a source to show me that I meant something." I looked away. "I shouldn't have gone to so many different people to find it, but I know that now."

"Better late than never Roxy. Don't worry, Axel cant possibly believe that you cheated on him when we all know that you didn't. Don't let his drunk irrationality ruin your relationship. We all deserve second chances." Reno shrugged and I nodded.

"If he so easily gave them to me, then I should be willing to give them to him."

"That's the spirit Rox." Reno smiled.

"Reno, thanks." I wanted to say more, but couldn't think of how to say it.

"Don't mention it." Reno looked away, content.

"Reno?" I wanted to tell him that he'd make a great dad, but would I sound weird?

"Yea?"

"I think you'd make a great mentor, or dad even." I said shyly.

Reno chuckled. "Thanks little man. To be honest, I almost felt responsible for you last night. It was nice to try to help you. I felt, accomplished." Reno smiled.

"You helped me, and when I needed it most."

"You just looked so scared. I couldn't leave you." Reno admitted.

"Thanks." I kissed Reno's cheek. "I've never had parents that I could look up to…or even tolerate. But I feel like I can look up to you and Rude, and that means a lot to me."

"Glad to hear it." Reno pulled me into a hug and kissed my temple.

"I wish you were my dad." I sniffled, thinking of how much better life would have been if I had someone as caring as Reno to raise me.

"I wish I could have been there for you back then. But if I was your dad, dating Axe would be illegal." Reno laughed and I smiled.

"True. Still, it felt so nice to be held by you and Rude last night." I confessed.

"It felt nice to hold you."

"I wish I had you to raise me." I huddled closer to Reno.

"I'm sorry kid. I wish I could have helped."

"Last night, as I laid between you and Rude, I felt safe." I smiled shyly.

"Oh Roxas." Reno squeezed me and ran his fingers in my hair. "Just remember, Axel loves you." Reno stood up to get something to drink as Rude and Axel came inside.

"Just get inside." That was Rude's voice, and I perked my head up when Axel lazily stumbled in.

"Roxas," Axel sighed with a small smile as he walked into the living room.

"You've got a lot of nerve to come in here smiling." Reno stood up.

"Look, I'm really sorry." Axel apologized to all of us.

"You ran away and left your poor victimized boyfriend all alone!" Reno yelled and I gulped.

"I know." Axel said weakly, his throat hoarse.

"He was raped, beaten, and slapped just because you had a little too much to drink. Do you have any idea what you put him through last night?" Reno continued to interrogate Axel.

"I'm sorry." Axel repeated but Reno ignored him.

"Roxas was crying his eyes out, hurt, upset, and sad all night long. All while you puked up your stupidity. I held him last night as he trembled and shook, crying out for you. But where were you Axe? Huh? Where were you?" Reno yelled and Axel started crying.

"I'm so sorry." Axel put his face in his hands and I stood up, putting a hand on Reno's arm.

"Reno, it's ok." I said and Reno rolled his eyes.

"You owe him the biggest apology of your life, so you better get started on it." Reno huffed as he went into the kitchen.

"You two can go in our room if you want." Rude said and I nodded.

"Ok." I started walking, hoping that Axel would follow; and he did follow, slowly with his hands wiping away his tears. We went inside the bedroom and Axel shut the door.

"I'm sorry I didn't believe you Roxas." Axel looked like he had been up all night puking, but I didn't care.

"It's ok. You do believe me, right?" I asked desperately and Axel nodded.

"I was way too drunk. I'm sorry." He looked so tired and I kissed his cheek.

"It's fine. Happy birthday."

Axel smiled at me. "Thank you for being so understanding. You so wonderful." Axel's eyes were heavy, but he kissed the cheek that he slapped last night, extra soft. "I love you Roxy." He put his arms around me and I put my head on his chest.

"I love you too."

We both sat on the bed, silently sitting next to each other.

"Roxas?" Axel didn't look at me.

"Yeah?"

"You're not mad, are you? I wouldn't blame you if you are, but I don't want you to be mad at me." Axel sniffled and I looked away.

"I'm not mad Axe. I'm hurt, but I'm not mad." I answered quietly.

"Please, forgive me?" Axel scooted as close to me as he could, our thighs touching.

"I forgive you Axel. I just need you to trust me, please? It hurt so bad to know that you didn't trust me."

"I do trust you Rox. I just, last night, I wasn't in the right mind. I know it's no excuse, and I'm so sorry. But I do trust you. You have to know that."

"Thanks." I smiled cheaply.

"He needs sleep. Do you two want to stay in here?" Reno and Rude walked in and I smiled.

"Is that ok?"

"Yea Rude and I have work. Get some rest, but treat each other right, you hear? I don't want to come back to have to separate you two. We'll make dinner when we get back." Reno waved and Rude huffed under his breath.

"You mean I'll make dinner."

"Oh hush." Reno scoffed when they left.

"My poor Roxy." Axel stroked my cheek and I gave a cheap smile.

"I'm fine."

"You were raped baby. And I hit you. I'm so sorry." Axel put his forehead on my shoulder and sniffled. "I'm sorry Roxy. I swear to god, if I see that bastard again, I'm guna kick his sorry ass." Axel looked me in the eye and I smiled.

"I think Rude took care of him."

"I only regret that I was too drunk to do it myself."

"Well it was for your birthday. Next time, we'll just watch how much we drink."

"Next time we'll stay home and snuggle." Axel cuddled up to me. "Hold me baby?" He asked and I smiled as I situated us in Reno's bed.

"Ok Axe." I kissed his temple.

"Mmm, I love my baby. You're so sweet and kind, mmm, so soft." Axel ran his hand up and down my side over Reno's shirt.

"Axe, we're in your brothers bed!" I reminded Axel, who stuck his tongue out.

"When I finish sobering up, we'll go back to my place and fuck ok?"

I hesitated. "I don't mind cuddling." I said quietly and Axel opened his eyes and looked up to me.

"You sure you're ok?"

I bit my lip before I continued. "My ass still hurts. And I don't want anything inside me. Sorry."

Axel sat up. "Don't apologize. If you don't want sex, that's perfectly fine. I don't want to hurt you anymore, ok?" Axel put his arms around me and I melted in his touch.

"I just hate being forced. And I hated feeling like I was cheating on you, but I swear Axe, I didn't want it." I sniffled and Axel nodded.

"I know babe, I know. Just relax. No ones going to touch you, ok? Just me. I'm going to take care of you." Axel fell asleep as I watched over him, and when he was deep asleep and completely out of it, I got up and ran all the way to his house, where I had his birthday present. It wasn't too smart with my still sore ankle, but I wanted to see Axel open his gift to cheer him up and lighten the mood for all of us.

I came back to Reno's house, opening to door to see Axel running around with a phone to his ear.

"Holy fucking shit! He's back! Ok, ok no worries. Thanks. I will. Bye Sora." Axel hung up and shook his head, panting.

"You called Sora?" I asked.

"Where the fuck did you go? Why didn't you leave a note? What were you thinking?" Axel shouted and I shrugged, scared of his angry voice.

"I went to get your birthday present and you were asleep."

"I woke up to see my boyfriend gone and nowhere to be found and the first thing I think is that that dumbass came and somehow got you. I was about to call the police Rox!" Axel put a hand to his head and I looked away.

"I'm sorry. I wanted to surprise you."

"You gave me a heart-attack. I was so scared." I looked up and saw that axel's eyes were watering. "Don't you ever do that again." He sniffled and I nodded as I put my chest against his body.

"I'm sorry."

"I love you Roxas. I don't want to think about you getting kidnapped or raped or hurt. I love you." He squeezed me and I squeezed back.

"I love you too Axe. Do, do you want to open it?"

Axel sighed to relax himself and nodded. "I'd love to."

I handed him his gift and watched as he dug into the red bag with green wrapping paper.

"I swear you're addicted to Christmas colors."

"No, just you." I smiled and Axel smiled back.

"I love you baby." He gently kissed my lips as he pulled out his gift, a black and red checkered scarf for the cold winter ahead.

"Do you like it?"

He smiled so sweetly. "I love it. Thank you." Axel put it around his neck and pulled me into a hug. Then he wrapped it around my neck, using it to bring us closer together.

"You're welcome. Maybe when I'm ready, we can use that for your birthday sex."

Axel raised a curious eyebrow. "Ooh, bondage? I'm in." Axel gave my lips a small peck and I smiled.

"How's your head?"

"Better. Clearer, now that I know that we're back to where we should be. Back to loving each other."

"I never stopped." I said and Axel looked away.

"We're never on the same page Roxas. We need to work on our communication if this is going to last. I know last night was my fault, but really, could you blame me?" He undid the scarf that held us together.

I really wish he hadn't asked that. I shrugged.

"I'm sorry."

"You don't need to apologize. I just, I just want us to have a normal relationship. I don't think that's too much to ask for, is it?"

I shook my head. "It's not."

"Then why cant we? Why cant we have a relationship like Reno's? Or Sora's?"

"I don't know." I shrugged, hurt, feeling absolutely shitty and wondering how Axel felt since it was his birthday.

"I just want to go a month without any major fights, any misunderstandings, any breakups."

"We can. Let's just enjoy your birthday, please?" I wanted so badly to change the subject, and Axel nodded.

"Alright. I'm sorry Rox, cheer up ok? I love your gift, a lot." Axel smiled and I did too.

"I'm glad. There's more, but we should wait till we're at your place alone." I smirked and Axel winked.

"I cant wait baby. Come on, hugs." Axel hugged me and I squeezed back just in time as Reno and Rude came back.

"We're back!" Reno announced as he and Rude came back in. Axel and I were on their couch just watching TV in each other's arms.

"Axe, how's your head?" Reno asked.

"If I take aspirin every four hours, I'll be ok." Axel shrugged.

"Good. I cant believe that you took eleven shots. You could have killed yourself." Reno shook his head.

"Nah, they weren't that strong. Besides, you seemed pretty wasted too."

"It was all an act to enjoy the moment." Reno scoffed. "You know I don't get drunk that easily."

Rude shook his head. "But you have no problem acting like it, even in public."

"Oh you know you like the fake drunk sex!" Reno put his hands on his hips and Rude smirked back.

"Dinner will be ready in a couple hours." Rude said as he made his way to the kitchen.

"You two doing ok?" Reno asked and I nodded. "Worked everything out?" He asked and again I nodded.

"Now we know that we should both stay away from getting hammered." Axel said and I smiled softly, still tired and for some reason, my heart started to feel heavy. Almost as if something was wrong or was going to be wrong, even though I couldn't really pin it down.

"As long as you two are treating each other the way you should, it'll be all good." Reno plopped down on the couch next to Axel as he changed the channel.

"That wont be a problem, will it Roxy?" Axel kissed my cheek and I smiled. Slowly I felt something tickle my bare skin and when I felt Axel's hand creep down my underwear and on my side, I flinched.

"No!" I shouted, pushing Axel away as I stood up.

"Roxas? What's wrong?" Axel stood up too but I backed up into the wall.

"I don't want to be touched." I started to sniffle and for some reason, I felt scared. I started panting and when Axel took another step forward I fell to my knees.

"Don't touch me!" I screamed and Reno stood up as well.

"Roxas, calm down. What's wrong?"

"What did you do to him?" Rude came out of the kitchen but Axel could only guess.

"I didn't do anything. I just put my hand on his side and he flipped out."

"Roxas?" Reno asked again but I was too busy holding myself, crying.

"I don't want to be touched." I whispered and when I looked up Reno was kneeling in front of me.

"I wont touch you. But I want to help you. Axel wants to help you. Tell us what's bothering you so that we can help you."

"I'm scared." I admitted, not even sure what I was saying or why, but my brain seemed to be missing.

"What are you scared of?" Reno asked and Axel stood behind him, looking nervous.

"Being hurt."

"Hurt? How?" Reno kept interrogating me as I cried harder.

"I don't want anything inside me. It hurt so bad. He was so rough with me." My vision started to blur as red stained my sight.

"No one is going to go in you, ok Roxy?" That was Axel and when I finished rubbing my eyes, I saw that he was kneeling too.

"Kay." I whimpered and Axel held his hands out.

"Can I hold you?" I thought for a moment before I nodded.

"Just not my skin. Please." I begged and Axel nodded.

"Come here." Axel held me and I continued my muffled sobs as Reno sighed.

"Axe, give him some space."

"But I," Axel argued, but Reno cut him off.

"Right now Roxas needs space." Reno repeated and Axel let go of me.

"It hurts." I said again. Last night, when I went to the bathroom after Reno drove us to his place, I realized that Luxord ripped my muscles and made me bleed.

"I think I have some pain meds that can help. Axel, get him one of those heating pads so he can sit on it." Reno ordered and they each walked away as I sat in the corner of the room.

"Come on, on your feet." Rude came up to me and offered a hand.

"Kay." I stood weakly, taking his hand as he pulled me up.

"Here, go ahead." Reno motioned to the couch for me to sit on the heating pad that Axel plugged in. "It should help relax your muscles, ok?"

I sat down and Axel watched as I swallowed some Motrin.

"I'm sorry." Axel gulped and I closed my eyes tired.

"Feeling any better?" Reno asked me and I nodded slowly. "Alright, get some rest." Reno said and I leaned against the armrest of the couch.

"Can I sit next to you?" Axel asked and I nodded, thankful that Axel cared enough to ask first.

"Alright, lets just be more careful." Reno said as Axel sat down.

"I love you Axe." I blinked the last of my tears free and Axel sighed, sounding tired.

"I know. I love you too. Just try to relax your body." Axel kept his distance as I adjusted to the emotions of the physical pain.

"Axe?" I asked once I was ready.

"What is it baby?" Axel tried to smile, for me.

"Hold me?"

"Of course." Axel scooted over to me and threw his arms around my hips, careful not to touch my bare skin.

"Don't let me go." I begged and Axel smiled.

"I wouldn't dream of it."

"I needed you Axe. I cried for you but you didn't come." I started to sniffle again.

"When?" Axel asked and I looked away.

"When Luxord was dragging me away." I confessed and I could see tears forming in Axel's eyes.

"I'm so sorry Rox. I shouldn't have left you. I'm so sorry." Axel let a tear fall and I felt so guilty for making him cry.

"I need you." I repeated and he nodded.

"I need you too." He nearly choked as I buried my face in his neck.

"I love you." I said again, just knowing that it had to be said. Axel rocked us back and forth, knowing just how to calm me down.

"I love you Roxas. I love you so much. I'm so proud of you." Axel added that last bit, knowing just how special it was for me to hear, especially since it encouraged me to try harder to be his perfect boyfriend.

"Why don't you two go lay down again and I'll get you when dinner's ready?" Reno suggested and when I nodded that I agreed, Axel carried us to Reno's bed, tucked us in, and held me as I took a much needed nap. All these emotions, memories, and flashbacks were becoming too much.

Author's Note: So I had a horrible sleepless night and am completely tired and drained. Just wanted to say thanks for reading!

To Hikari Tsukiyomi: YAY I'm glad that you liked the chapter! You really are so sweet and you're compliments are such an uplifting part of my day, it makes me try harder not to let you down! I hope this chapter met your standards. And thanks for saying thank you multiple times ^_^

To kindofbadger: I'm glad that you liked the variety of emotions and at the stupidity of Axel and Demyx being drunk. Yes, Reno and Rude seem so much more approachable then most stories make them seem, so I try to show just how sweet I feel them to really be. Arent they adorable together? And wanting a baby….i just HAD to throw that in ;) Thank you so much for being a dedicated and thoughtful fan!

To Vocal-len02: Thanks! I love my Reno lol!

To Shadowridge: Uh….do you want the long answer or the short answer? . I know I tend to include it a lot in many of my stories, and I apologize if its overdone and unnecessary for the storyline, but it helps me adjust with some of the trust issues I have thanks to my ex…..so yea…. I hope that made enough sense lol.

To KidaKama: AH! I'm sorry for making you mad at Luxord! I love Luxord too. He's usually one of my fav Org. 13 members (besides, Axel, Demyx, Roxas, Zexion, and Marly), but I needed a 'bad tough looking guy' and he totally fits the profile. Awww, I'm sorry that you almost cried, but I'm glad that my writing was convincing enough lol. I cant wait to see it, thanks Sunshine.