Thank you for the reviews. I will have the next chapter up as soon as I can, but no guarantees for a speedy update, because that bloody anniversary is just way too soon for my liking.

Thank you, Jess. I couldn't do this without you – and I wouldn't want to.

Chapter Four

Fighting

Sara had driven out to the desert after having left Veronica's house. How dare she? How dare she talk to her like that? Who did she think she was - the goddamn oracle of Delphi? She had no right talking to her like that!

She got out of the car and walked around it, trying to get her anger in check. Veronica had always been able to push her buttons. 'That is if pushing buttons means the same as hitting the nail right on the head.' A little voice in the back of her head said. She sighed sitting down on the ground, her head leaning back against the side of the car. It would really help if the little voice wasn't sounding exactly like Veronica.

She took several deep breaths, calming herself down. Veronica had been right, she had never been good at letting people get close to her and she had always run away when people got too close. She hadn't run from Grissom when he'd called her for help, but that was easily explained. He never really took a personal interest in her, he liked her because of her forensics skills and that was it. Or at least that had been it until he asked her out. She shook her head, that was just never going to happen.

She closed her eyes in defeat as she realized that she had just run away from Veronica for the second time.

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"Linds! Dinner is ready!" Catherine yelled up the stairs. She sighed as she went to sit down at the table. The girl was still mad at her and she had no idea how she could fix it.

Lindsey sat down without a word and they started eating. After a while the silence was getting to Catherine.

"Lindsey, we have to talk about this."

"I don't want to talk about it." Lindsey mumbled into her meatloaf.

"Well, I do!" Catherine put down her fork. "I don't know how you got the impression that Sara is not interested in a relationship with me, but you're wrong. She's not just…" She stopped.

"Sleeping with you?" Lindsey asked. "How do you know? It's not like any of the others were interested in anything else!"

"Lindsey!" Catherine couldn't help her voice from rising. "Sara has been through a lot lately and she just needs a little time and that's what I'm giving her."

"And when you're not gonna give her anymore time, she's gonna leave!" Lindsey stood up suddenly, knocking her chair over.

"Lindsey, stop it right now!" Catherine stood up as well.

"Was that why you were a stripper? Just to get people to sleep with you? Are you even sure Dad's my dad?" Lindsey ran up to her room slamming the door, leaving Catherine looking like someone slapped her in the face.

She sat heavily back down looking blankly into space. Was that was Lindsey though of her? She saw her as a common… slut? She thought that she was sleeping around with just anyone? And of course Eddie was a saint! She felt numb and barely registered the tears falling down her cheeks. She had chosen to be open about parts of her past with Lindsey in the hopes that she would never consider stepping in her footsteps, but she had never thought that it would backfire like this. She had tried to show her that she was a strong independent woman who she could look up to. She had tried to show her that you didn't need a man to be all that you can be, by not introducing her to boyfriends or lovers in the past. It had been the right decision, but it had turned her into a slut in her daughter's eyes. She shivered at the thought. How could things have gone so bad? She wasn't sleeping around, she just never found the right one – until now. Or had she? Was Sara really serious about the two of them?

Suddenly Lindsey's final words hit her. She thought that she had… that Eddie wasn't… She couldn't even bare to finish the thought. Of course Eddie is your father! She screamed silently in her head. She slowly got up, wiping the tears from her face and looking towards the stairs. She had to go talk to her daughter again. She walked slowly towards the stairs, but just as she reached the bottom step the doorbell rang and the door swung open revealing her mother and nephew Jeremy.

"Mom?" She looked at the older woman. "What are you doing here?"

"Nancy had to work late," her mother said whilst taking off her jacket and hanging it up, "so I'm watching the kids tonight." She stopped and looked at the knocked over chair in the middle of the room and raised an eyebrow at Catherine.

"Hi, Aunt Catherine." Jeremy said hanging up his jacket. "Can I go watch TV?"

"Hi Jerr," Catherine looked over at him. "Sure, you know how everything works." She gestured towards the living room.

"What happened here?" Lily asked once the boy had left the room.

"Lindsey and I had a fight." Catherine went to the table picking up the chair on her way and started clearing the table.

"About what?" Lily started helping her.

"I don't want to talk about it, mom." Catherine went to the kitchen trying to get a little distance.

"You've been crying." Her mother stated from behind her.

"Mom, I don't want to talk about it and I'm not in the mood for another fight." Catherine leaned against the counter facing away from the older woman.

"Don't raise your voice to me and start one then." She heard her mother go back to the dining room and clear the rest of the table. "You need to spend more time with that girl." She said when she returned to the kitchen. "She's your daughter, that's for sure."

"What do you mean by that?" Catherine sighed inwardly when her mother started up the old argument.

"I mean she's just like you, inside and out. And we all know where that led you."

"Yes, Mom," Catherine sighed starting to wash the dishes. "We all know that." She looked over at the older woman when she stood next to her drying the dishes she was washing. "I am spending more time with her. I'm working the least amount of hours I possibly can and I try the best I can."

"Ok." Her mother didn't sound convinced.

"This fight had nothing to do with that."

"If you say so." Lily put away the plates she had dried off.

"Mom, could we please not fight about this now?" Catherine turned towards her mother with a pleading look. "Could you just call me a cab instead, please? I have to be at work soon."

"Is your car not working?"

"Sara gave me a ride home this morning, my car is still at the lab." Catherine turned away from her again.

"So why don't you have that Sara girl come pick you up again?"

"Because…" Catherine took a deep breath. "I'm not in the mood to be in the confined space of a car with that Sara girl right now. Please just call the cab?" She walked out of the kitchen. "I'm going to get changed."

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"Hey Sara." Nick greeted her when she entered the break room. "You're late."

"What?" Sara looked at her watch, shift wasn't starting for another five minutes.

"You're not in hours early." Nick grinned at her. "How was your day with Catherine?" He asked, wiggling his eyebrows.

"It was fine." Sara poured herself a cup of coffee, avoiding looking at the Texan.

"Just fine?" Nick asked looking closer at her. "I would have thought spending the morning with Catherine Willows would…"

"Shut up, Nick!" Sara walked towards the door. "I'm going to work on the case from yesterday if Grissom asks." She left the room and walked fast down the corridor almost running into Warrick.

"Hey, what's up with her today?" He asked Nick when he stepped into the break room.

"Don't know," Nick shrugged, "I just asked how her day was and she stormed out."

"Trouble in paradise?" Warrick asked, pouring a cup of coffee.

"I don't know." Nick looked down the corridor where Sara had disappeared. "What does Catherine say?"

"I haven't seen her tonight." Warrick shrugged.

"I just hope they'll make up soon." Nick said with a pained smile. "I'm working a case with Sara."

"Ouch." Warrick pretended to be hurt. "Sorry dude."

"Warrick, Nick I need you on a case." Grissom stuck his head in the room interrupting their fun. "Arson." He gave Nick the slip with the information on it.

"What about our case from last night?" Nick asked.

"Sara can cover that." Grissom looked over at Warrick. "I'll write up the report on our case."

"Ok." Warrick got up from his seat. "Hey, Gris?" He stopped the older man from leaving.

"Yes?"

"Have you seen Catherine tonight?"

"She's in her office doing paperwork, waiting on results on her case." Grissom walked away from them.

"Definitely trouble in paradise." Nick said as he got up to leave the room.

"Yeah." Warrick nodded and followed him out the door.

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Catherine sighed looking at all the papers on her desk. She had gone through some already but her concentration was slipping. She couldn't help but think about what had happened over the last few hours. Last night at this time she had been the happiest person alive, but now she was just the opposite. Her daughter thought she was a slut, her mom was riding her about spending more time with said daughter and Sara… Sara was nowhere in sight. She sighed deeply. She needed to think this through before seeking out Sara to talk to her. She needed to yell at her for leaving this morning and making all this happen, but at the same time she also just needed her arms around her comforting her. She tried to focus on the papers in front of her again but failed. She was in love with Sara, but what did the brunette feel about her? She looked up when there was a knock on the door. The door opened before she had a chance to say come in. She hated when people did that.

"Sara?" She was surprised to see that she had come to her instead of it being the other way around.

"Veronica knows I'm ticklish by accident. We had a pillow fight one night and she accidentally tickled me, so that's how she knows."

"What?" Catherine leaned back in her chair confused.

"You asked me that, remember? The morning we all went out for breakfast, when I met Veronica again."

"Yes, but..." She stopped when Sara held up a hand stopping her.

"Just let me do this before I chicken out…" She paused shortly, thinking. "Veronica was my first in so many ways – no not… not that." She clarified when she saw the expression on the blonde's face. "I mean, she was the first person I opened up to, the first person who I could keep trying to push away without success. She was always there. She was the first person who cared whether I was ticklish or not. She saw Sara the person and not just the brain, the scientist, the geek or the foster child. So when I couldn't push her away, I ran away instead. Because that's what I do - I run away when something good happens to me, like being with you. I want to change that, but I'm going to screw up sometimes and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry that I wasn't there this morning when you got back with Lindsey. I just got scared. I'm sorry." She stopped her little speech and looked at Catherine.

"Sara, if this is just a good excuse to get laid, I need you to tell me. I can do sex." Catherine fought to keep the tears at bay. "But I can't keep defending your actions to Lindsey if it's…"

Sara went around the desk and kneeled down beside Catherine and turned the chair so she was facing her.

"It's not about sex." She said cupping the blonde's face in her hands. "I want to be with you. I'm so sorry, Cath." She pulled her down for a hug.

"She thinks I'm a slut." Catherine whispered against Sara's hair, finally letting the tears fall.

"What?" Sara held her out looking at her. "Who thinks that?"

"Linds." Catherine looked away from the brunette kneeling in front of her, drying her tears.

"God, Cath." Sara reached up again wiping away the remaining tears with her thumb. "I'm so sorry. I did this, didn't I? I'm so sor…" She was interrupted by a knock on the door.

"Hey Cath." Greg entered without waiting for an answer. "I got the results back from trace…" He stopped when he looked up from the papers he was reading and saw Sara on the floor next to Catherine. "I'm sorry. I'm interrupting. I'll just come back later." He turned walking back out the office, but didn't make it before Catherine spoke up.

"No, Greg." She stood up walking past Sara to the other side of the desk. "Let me see those." She held out her hand for the files.

"I better get back to work as well." Sara got up and walked to the door. "Talk to you later?" She asked Catherine.

"Yes." Catherine nodded.

"After shift?"

"I have to get home and spend time with Lindsey." Catherine looked up from the file shortly.

"Ok." Sara nodded sadly. "I'll call you later then." She patted Greg on the shoulder before leaving the office.

"Everything ok?" Greg asked looking at Catherine.

"It's fine, Greg." Catherine dismissed him. "Where are we on the DNA results?" She asked, shifting back into work mode.