Note: Petrichor is the smell after it rains on dust... for any non Doctor Who fans, it's where I learned the word. :-)

Chapter Ten

Lance stood under the hot spray of the shower, it was double the size of the rest of the teams shower. It fit two grown men, easily, well and was perfect for slamming Keith against the tiled walls. Thinking about it all now, Allura had given them the suite as a wedding gift, custom made. How dense were they? Not that he really thought Allura knew he slammed Keith against shower walls, he laughed a bit as the thought occurred to him, but then had to squeeze his eyes shut hard and shake his head.

No thinking of naked Keith with that ass pushed up into the air, he chastised himself and turned off the hot water, forcing a spray of ice cold water to pound over him and he shivered, felt for a second he might freeze into an icicle, before he turned off the water completely. It was turning into a daily shower habit... Had been since Keith got back, been worse the past few days. It'd been worse the few days, remembering what it was like to touch Keith, to be kissed by Keith, to be claimed by Keith.

"Of course then right afterward there is the instant declaration of the opposite. An exercise in extreme mixed signals," Lance said to himself talking out of the shower, grabbing a small towel to run through his hair and not bothering with one for around his waist. If more of his friends were still lurking around in his room they could deal with his balls.

He walked to his closet, started looking through his jeans and felt like he'd done this a million times already today. He sighed, thinking about Allura's well-meaning but way over simplified advice. He went to pull out an old raggedy pair, with holes at the knees he'd had since he was nineteen. Someday they were going to die on him but he wasn't tossing them until then, they made him look good. He might as well make Keith drool, if he couldn't do anything else, Lance thought idly. But as his hand fell on the fabric he heard something clink and muffled noise he couldn't place from the living area of his suite. He frowned, what the hell, what now was Allura looking through his DVDs for sex tapes to watch so she could prove they Made Love, and he should fight for it...he rolled his eyes and walked out into the room naked.

"Allura, what the hell do you want now?"

Keith stood up, holding Lance's old baseball trophy, that Lance had on his desk to be used as a paper weight, his eyes taking in Lance. Then he huffed. "Really? You think the Princess of Arus is your living room, and you walk out like that. You have no respect for her title, her standing, it's a wonder she puts up with..."

"Allura, would slap me if I started respecting her damn title, and stopped treating her like I treat everyone else... what the fuck are you doing here?" Lance asked, trying not to get hopes up.

"Allura locked me in."

Hopes burned. Lance sighed, rolled his eyes to his ceiling and walked over to his door. It wouldn't open, he tried everything including his override codes. "What the hell, she used her Princess Code didn't she?" Lance said, turning to look at Keith.

Keith nodded.

Lance started to walk back to his room.

"If you're going for your voltcom to contact Pidge or Hunk, I wouldn't bother. They contacted me but didn't say much but point and laugh."

Lance closed his eyes again, he felt he was doing that a lot, but counting to five or ten, worked better for him if he couldn't see. If he could shut out the outside and just focus on trying not to let his mouth and his anger overwhelm him. "I'll be right back," he muttered and walked into his room, back to his closet and he grabbed the raggedy pair of jeans and he hopped into them. Right now the last person he could deal with naked was Keith, he was vulnerable enough as it was, he thought.

He leaned against the threshold of his bedroom door, instead of walking into the living area, where Keith still stood by his desk, holding his trophy. "So, how'd she get you in here."

"Allura made it sound like you were grieviously injured and they'd told her to get me cause you were bleeding to death."

Lance rolled his eyes. "You fell for that?"

Keith eyes slid to the glass case that held all of Lance's model airplanes, spacecraft and various other ships that flew. He swallowed. "My theory was you punched that and opened your artery wide open. Allura, only gave me enough information for me think the worst."

Lance shrugged, the theory was sound, he'd been angry enough lately to punch the damn glass case. "You're great at thinking the worst, that's for sure."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

Lance didn't answer, he moved into his kitchen and opened his refrigerator. "Well, we have a block of cheese, some bread, and one slice of pizza. Oh, and a lot of beer," he pulled out two beers.

"You should eat better."

"You should fuck off," Lance mumbled.

"What?"

Lance turned around. "So, when is she letting us out?"

"When we've worked things out or, Arus is under attack and they need us."

"Bring on Lotor," Lance said, opening the two beer bottles on the counter. Then he walked into his living room, handed Keith one of the bottles.

Keith took it but didn't say anything for a long time. Then he put the trophy back down, fiddled with it for a bit, before he decided it was in the right spot, and looked back up. "So...uh, Granger, he uh..."

"Left. I know."

Keith nodded. "Uh, I wasn't going to say that."

"Really?"

"No. I screwed..."

"Really don't want to know," Lance snapped walking past Keith to sit down on his leather couch. He grabbed his remote and turned on the television, started to flick through channels.

"Lance," Keith said, frustration and anger loud in his voice. "I'm trying to apologize here."

Lance raised an eyebrow. His stomach twisted but he didn't have high hopes he'd like the apology, there was no way Keith was going to admit to the huge mistake of inviting another man to the Castle because he still had feelings for Lance. Lance knew that was true it was just unlike Allura and the rest of their friends he wasn't sure it was enough.

"I handled that all wrong. I should have giving you more time, I should have gone there..." Keith trailed off, turned around drinking out of his bottle of beer and stared out the window.

Lance hated it when he was right about things he didn't want to happen. No matter what people said, about him never hating it when he was right. "Whatever."

Keith spun around. "Why do you even care?"

"Why do..." Lance started to spit out but he stopped. He wasn't going to repeat himself. "Did you a thing I said last night?"

Keith kept eye contact, his facial muscles seemed to soften before they hardened again and Lance once again saw the back of Keith's head. "I heard it, haven't seen it."

"Yeah, cause me an angry jealous asshole since he showed up has been so unobvious."

Keith winced. "Not what I meant."

"Then what?"

"Why the hell didn't you barge in, Lance? Why were you thinking about asking to come in, and then why the fuck did walk away?"

Lance rolled his eyes, Allura had said Keith had focused on that when she let it slip. "I didn't think I'd be welcome."

"Like something like that ever stopped you from going after what you want," Keith spat out.

"Right, and you were giving me so many signs Keith that you wanted me barging into your new quarters. You came home, hugged Allura, smiled at everyone and started accusing me of being too reckless to lead the team. Like I hadn't been leading it the entire time you were gone."

"You only gave a damn about your standing with the team. Leadership go to your fucking head."

"Please, like you don't have an ego that's bigger than mine underneath that shy, modest act."

"You were acting like possessive selfish jerk about me usurping some supposed power..."

"Supposed!" Lance yelled, jumping to his feet. "Where the hell were you when I was here. Picking up all the pieces and running a fucking flight school!"

"Alone!" Keith yelled.

Lance shut his mouth, the words that his brain had at the ready, expecting a few possible reactions from Keith were all blown to hell. That wasn't the response he'd been expecting. Lance shook his head, confused. "Alone? Keith, you didn't need to be alone out there. You could have contacted us anytime. Pidge's system was full proof. You were the one who would only contact us once in awhile, and not once did you contact me directly."

"Goes both ways, Lance."

Lance rolled his eyes. "You know maybe you don't recall this, but you were the one who accused me of cheating. Which wasn't happening, I think even you have figured that out by now."

Keith looked down, hand coming up to run down the back of his neck, where it used to tangle into his hair. Lance had to force himself not to smile at the nervous gesture, because it wasn't endearing, it wasn't cute...there was nothing sexy about it. Nope. Keith dropped his bottle of beer onto Lance's desk, walked closer to where Lance was standing and looked up.

His dark blue eyes showed the guilt, the shame he felt about the past accusation, Lance swallowed. That was something anyway, but he clenched his jaw. It'd been too long, so long and there was Granger, there was so much - nothing, before that. "I met Lydia," Keith said, shocking him.

Lance's eyes widened. "Really?"

"I got in trouble on Lyra...minor thing but I had no choice, I had to swallow my pride and call Farla for a favor." Keith looked up at the ceiling, Lance could almost see the thought bubble form that said, I'd like the room to swallow me whole now. "Instead of Farla walking through the door though to rescue was this Garrison officer... I thought she'd turned me in."

Lance scoffed. "As if..."

Keith held up his hand. "But Lydia, the second she could handed me a note. It said, Couldn't make it but you can trust my wife. Farla."

Lance raised his eyebrows.

"Lydia got me out, it was fine." Keith said. "I, uh, I had to ask..."

"How long?"

"Yeah, she told me their wedding date and said it was all thanks to you. You helped Farla and her get through all the red tape and called in a few favors. It...kind of clicked into place."

"Yeah, I'm bet it did," Lance said dryly.

"Lance.."

"When was this?" Lance asked.

"Two years ago," Keith said, voice so low Lance barely heard him. He kind of wished he hadn't heard him.

"Couldn't contact me?"

"I was pissed off."

"Of course you were."

"You had me thinking you were cheating on me, and you were just doing a favor. I asked Pidge and Hunk a few questions, they had no idea Farla was married."

Lance shrugged. "I was pissed at the time, I just never told anyone what the truth was. Since the only person I wanted to tell, wouldn't listen."

"I thought you were lying."

"Right, cause I lie to you so often."

"You went to Lyra, more than once, then their was that trip to Earth. I... You weren't talking to me..."

"You accused me of cheating Keith, when..." Lance clamped his mouth shut.

"You did it on purpose," Keith spat out. "You were pissing me off on purpose."

"Yeah, well, I wanted to see if you remembered I existed. I didn't think it'd turn into you showing me how little you trusted me."

Keith startled.

Lance threw up his hands, spilling beer out of his bottle, reminding him it was still there in his hand. He gulped down a few mouth full, then put it down on his coffee table. He went back to his couch and sat down. Started to flick through the channels again, he felt Keith's weight join him on the couch.

"I don't distrust you."

"I hear a but."

"I...You don't know what it's like, having you as a boyfriend."

Lance turned to face Keith, staring at him. "Great, let's here this crap."

"It's not... Do you know how many times after meeting us, women came up to me to ask if you had a girlfriend?"

"Probably the same damn about of times it happened to me about you."

Keith's eyes widened.

Lance laughed. "One thing you never got Keith was you're hotter than hell. People drool over you."

"That's you," Keith said.

"Well, me too. But, you, a lot. I was threatening guys and telling women, you were taken by me all the fucking time. Always laughed when the girl or guy would then look me up and down and offer a threesome, best ones really. It was a good laugh."

Keith blushed, mouth opened and he sighed. "I hated that."

Lance shrugged.

"No fucking way I was sharing you."

Lance closed his eyes, ten, nine, eight... He couldn't handle this, the fighting, the mixed signals. four, three, two... "Keith, I..." his voice broke and he had to look away from Keith. "I can't do this," he stood up and walked into the kitchen. Opening the cupboard under his sink he pulled out the small tool box with household items. "We're trained Garrison soldiers. We can break out of fucking room."

Keith had stayed on the couch, followed him only with his eyes and he was staring at Lance now. His eyes darting from the tool box to Lance's abs. Back and forth, his tongue poked out he nodded. "Right. Let's be soldiers," he said, but Lance heard the bitterness.

Lance dropped the box on the floor. It thunked, even against the carpeting, Keith's eyes widened in surprise. "Allura, keeps telling me if we talk we'll straighten things out."

Keith laughed, it was a similar hollow, upset laughter that Lance understood so well. "Right."

"It's why were locked in here. She was telling me and again and again, talk to him Lance..." Lance sighed.

"I've heard the advice."

"Pidge and Hunk are no better," Lance muttered.

"I've noticed."

"So, uh... since they outnumber us. Want to try it?" Lance asked with a shrug.

Keith gave him a long look and nodded. "Uh, how?"

"Uh, I don't know," Lance said.

"Well, me either." Keith said.

Lance sighed. "I told her we didn't do talking."

"We should've."

Lance picked up on the tone, there, Keith was always trying to get him to talk a bit more to him about feelings and things. Lance liked showing Keith how he felt, how much he loved him with his actions, with his tongue against skin instead of the roof of his own mouth. It was the tattoos, it was pushing Keith against walls in public and stealing a kiss. It was teasing him and making him blush about how gorgeous he was in public. Because the guy never did get it... He was a fucking God.

"I'm sorry," Lance heard himself saying before his mind caught up with his heart and his mouth.

"You are?"

Lance wanted the room to swallow him now, he moved over to his desk, pushed the papers to the side and sat down on it rather than at it. He stared at Keith, in a pair of old jeans himself, blue henley that matched his eyes. He wanted him, he thought more than ever he needed him, it's why he'd been in front of Keith's door, wanting to drag back here to their room since he came back so many times. But he didn't think Keith wanted back here... It made him insecure, Lance hated feeling insecure. Confident and full of himself was his default, he liked it that way but Keith always put him in situations, placed him moments where wasn't as sure and he had to fight through a wave of complete lack of self-confidence.

"Allura said I should waylay you under some mistletoe."

Keith looked up the ceiling.

"I don't think she had time, she wasn't plotting when she left me to shower. I would seen it..." Lance said, thinking he thought he'd have noticed it anyway. He'd taught the girl how to be a devious prank in the first place.

Keith eyes came down and landed on Lance, their gazes connected. Keith smiled. "I was thinking about...our first kiss yesterday."

"That before or after you kissed me?" Lance asked.

Keith sat up, stood up and started walking toward Lance. Lance stayed where he was, sitting on his desk, mostly leaning. "It was before, way before..." Keith admitted.

"Granger must have loved that."

"He wanted...he wanted something I want. I talked myself into thinking I could do it with him."

Lance shook his head. "Keith, you always could rationalize yourself into the stupidest things. Like that time you talk yourself into going to the prom with that poor geeky girl who had crush on you and then she thought you two were dating...and you had to tell her you were gay and wanted to go with her as her friend. And it all blew up and we ended up having to find her after she ran away embarrassed and her father was threatening to murder you for upsetting his daughter."

Keith blushed. "You swore never to mention that again."

"It seemed like a good correlation to the stupidity of Granger. So what is it?"

"What?"

"What did he want that you want, that you thought you could settle for with him?"

"I don't think it matters right now, I think... He was the one to make me realize that if you and I ever officially broke up, it was down in the gym after I came to find you because you'd seen Granger first."

Lance shuddered, the thought physically hit him as wrong. It just was, he thought. If they had to be stuck in this fucking limbo for life, fine. But it'd be better than that, anything would be better than that. "Fuck no," he hissed out without thought.

"I couldn't deal with it," Keith said. "That and then grabbing you, feeling jealous about Allura... it was..."

"What?" Lance asked, watching as Keith's hands grabbed his left hand, the one he'd mangled the most on the punching bag. Keith pulled his arm closer to him, his fingers skimmed over the raw, newer skin. Lance held his breath.

"I should've realized I was lying to myself sooner. It shouldn't have..."

Lance swallowed, he couldn't be this close to Keith and not react and he thought Keith was right, he should have caught the ride on the self-awareness train a hell of a lot sooner. "I wanted to barge in, Keith," he said. "I wanted you to stay here, I didn't want to stop..." he finished his sentence his lips brushing against Keith's adam's apple.

Keith groaned and Lance looked up, saw dark eyes and then Keith's lips against his. He tasted cookies, good cookies and underneath that there was his Keith, thunder, lightning and pretichor. He inhaled deeply, breathing out against Keith's jaw, kissing him. "Who made those cookies..."

"Chip. Ninja stars..." Keith murmured. "Box played Little Town of Bethlehem."

"Amen," Lance whispered no longer thinking about cookies he pulled at Keith's shirt but still kissing his neck.

Keith lifted his arms, creating way too much space between them. Lance shook his head, hurriedly took off the shirt and pulled Keith down over him, backing up, putting more of his own ass onto the desk. Keith crawled over him, hands on the button of Lance's the jeans, which flicked opened with barely a touch because the jeans were so worn.