***Yay, the moment is here. There's still a lot of story left, so be patient as I unravel and unfold Bella and Jacob's journey to where they're supposed to be. Rome wasn't built in a day.

The Wedding - JPOV

Ok, I'm a guy, but I'll admit it, the wedding was beautiful. So many flowers, so many people all dressed up nice, and so many smiles. This is why women go to so much trouble! Everyone coming together for something positive for a change. I'd almost forgotten what that was like. Then, the bride made her grand entrance and everyone gasped. Emily looked gorgeous, beaming as she walked with her father. He had that look, the same look all fathers have when walking their daughters down the aisle.

I didn't look up to notice if Emily's special guests were here, I didn't have to. I made a deliberate choice not to look around, even as that old familiar stench wafted through the air. It was intense. The Cullens were here.

For Sam and Emily.

I chanted these words over and over again all the while being reminded of why I'm here - to stop Sam and the pack from jumping over the pews into the audience and ripping each leech to pieces. It's amazing how strong the instinct is, how easy it can be to let it take over anything human in you, and even more amazing - how strong I was to resist this - more than any of the others. Even Sam had not developed a tolerance to being around them like me. I understood fully now, I'm here to keep the peace. Damn.

Every time I got a whiff of those parasites it curdled my stomach. It was all I could do to not throw up. I heard a low growl coming from the line of groomsmen and ordered them to stop, which they did. This is going to be hard on everyone I see.

For Sam and Em. For Sam and Em.

I knew Em and Bella liked each other, I also knew Em felt a strong sense of gratitude to the vampires for doing their part in the clearing that day and with helping me in my recovery. It made sense that she would invite them so I couldn't feel any aggravation towards her. The entire pack supports her decision, but it was still hard for us. I couldn't be angry with Em if I tried, she meant well. There wasn't a malicious bone in her body.

I never looked into the crowd to see which ones showed because I didn't have to. Being around them so much, I had become attuned to each of their scents. I could track each individual vamp from miles away if given the opportunity. And I was sure Bella was here, too. Even amongst the stink I could pick her scent out. How can she...?

Stopping myself in mid-thought I decided it didn't matter. There's no use in asking pointless questions, cause all you'll get are pointless answers. It wouldn't help anyway, none of it made sense. Another reason it doesn't matter is because it doesn't change anything. She made her choice.

The only thing I had to do now was be sure Super Leech didn't have full access to my thoughts. It's hugely unfair that he should know what I'm thinking on top of everything else. He's already taken so much from me, I won't let him have that, too. I managed to block him before, I'd do it again.

The wedding went off without a hitch. They said their I-do's and the rings were exchanged - I'd never seen Sam shake so much that wasn't wolf related - I couldn't help but laugh. As the couple were pronounced "man and wife", Sam kissed his blushing bride like a man who couldn't wait another second. It was as if not holding or kissing her for even one minute caused him great pain. Then that was it. The whole thing took 14 minutes tops, like I figured, but nobody cared. Em got the wedding she'd always dreamed of and Sam got his bride. Nothing could make this day bad.

The reception was just starting and the receiving line seemed to take forever. I was anxious to get to the food, the dancing, the flower bouquet toss thing, the cake cutting, anything to get this night over with and get away from having to stand here and make small talk with 100+ people, not to mention the ones who were making my nose burn.

"Hey Jacob!" said Charlie as he reached for my hand.

"Charlie! Hey, it's good to see you, glad you could make it!" I didn't realize until just now how much I had missed him, too.

"Oh I wouldn't have missed it. So, I see you're all healed up now. You look good, a little skinny but you know, as big as ever. Billy said you had gone to go visit some relatives. I have to admit when you didn't come back I was wondering if that was really the whole story or if he was putting one over on me," he said, laughing.

I laughed, "No, no conspiracy. I'm all healed up. Just needed a change of scenery." I didn't say why but I'm sure I didn't have to. Gone to visit relatives huh? Good one, dad.

"Well, I'd better get through the rest of the line, let's talk some more in a bit, huh. It was good seeing you, Jake!"

"You, too," I said, smiling.

I almost hated seeing Charlie leave, only because I knew who would be coming up next. I braced myself.

"Hi Jacob."

It's hard to explain really what I was feeling. When I used to imagine our first meeting I had several things scripted to say. I used to wonder how it would feel, how I would react. But it was nothing like I thought. It seemed like we were in a vacuum, just her and me, and for one long second I had forgotten everything that happened from before, all the bad stuff. I felt heat rising up from the pit of my stomach warming me. It was the most alive I had felt in a long time. Just me and Bells again, just being near her...if only for a second. But as quickly as it came it was gone, everything inside iced over as I remembered it all again.

"Hey Bells," I said, remembering Sam's words, "Maintain Jacob, look at me, relax." I took a quick look at Sam who took a quick look at me. He nodded as if he understood how hard this was for me.

I smiled at her but I know it wasn't a full smile. I couldn't manage one. It was the same kind of mechanical smile I had given everyone today. The look on her face told me everything I needed to know. I could read Bella like a book, I was one of the few people in her life who could. I knew her bloodsuckers couldn't and even if they lived hundreds of years with her they'd never be able to read her like I could. I had to admit, that gave me a sweet kind of satisfaction.

In just 2.5 seconds I was able to read in Bella's face:

"He looks so different, he's lost weight. Uh oh he didn't smile big, it looked fake to me. Should I give him a hug? Would that be too much? What do I do? Will Edward be mad? I don't want Jacob to think I'm mad at him. Why doesn't he hug me or something?"

Taking the initiative if only just to move the line along, I reached down and gave her a hug, which she gladly reciprocated. As mechanical as it was it did seem to lighten the mood. I used to feel a strange butterflies feeling whenever we would get close. But right now, nothing. I felt dead inside. This suited me just fine. I didn't want to feel anything right now.

I could tell she wanted to say something else but she seemed to be fighting it or it was fighting her. If I didn't know any better I'd think she had some kind of injunction on her. This reminded me of the time I was in her room trying to tell her about the pack.

I broke the silence. "Come find me later, we'll talk then, okay. I've got some best man duties to do."

"Oh, okay," she was fine with this. I could see the relief in her face. This wasn't a lie, I really did have some things to do first. Duty and family first. And Bella wasn't a part of my family, anymore.

I was fighting every single one of my instincts as I braced myself for the rest of them. And from the look on their faces they were having just as hard a time being around us. The entire Cullen clan showed up and some part of me was glad for Sam and Emily that the vamps were here. They were given a special sanction in order to be on our side of the boundary, not just today, but indefinitely. Provisionally, of course.

It seems when I was gone, Sam and Carlisle were in talks. The Cullens weren't free to come and go as they pleased into the Quileute territories, but as long as they respected our boundary and promised not to go too deep into our area without first telling us their business, we promised to allow some leniency - within reason.

This allowed them to keep watch for others of their kind while also allowing for a wider span in which to hunt their food of preference. We, by all means, did not want them to go hungry. This was necessary in eliminating having to worry about policing them or wearing ourselves out trying to watch the border every second of every day. Or worse, lose chase of a rogue vampire that crossed into our territory or theirs again, like the redheaded leech did. Likewise, we were at liberty to come and go anywhere into Forks as needed. This truce served everyone well, for as long as it lasts anyway.

It spoke well of the Cullens that they would show for something like this. They were just as surrounded by their mortal enemies as we were. Could some of the old animosity between our clans be coming to an end - to be replaced with something new? It was too early to say. Because once the treaty is broken, none of that "progress" will matter. It depends entirely on them.

As Edward got closer I could sense a shift in the air. A tension emanating off of one of us. It was Paul, he was only a second or two away from erupting. Always the hot-head, Paul was gritting his teeth and shaking, and was on the verge of losing it. I quickly shot him a hard look and whispered at a level only we could hear, "Back Down!"

He quickly averted his eyes and did as he was told but under protest. I don't know if the bloodsuckers heard and I don't really care. This was all still a little too new, socializing with the enemy.

"Jacob," Edward said, as cordial as always. He didn't let on that he heard anything. I'm sure he could read anything going on in Paul's mind anyway, and I'm absolutely sure it was colorful as hell.

"Edward," I said equally bland. Neither of us bothered with any small talk but neither of us looked away, either. You didn't have to be a mind-reader to know what we were thinking. You could feel it. In spite of it all though, I think I handled myself pretty well. Sam would be proud.

We shook hands and it somehow took me by surprise. I was prepared for how cold and hard his hand would be, but there was no bone-breaking He-man grip or attempt to rip my arm out of its socket. Silly as it sounds, it all made me hate him that much more. I just wish for once he would show some kind of emotion instead of always acting like an uptight ice sculpture. I think I'd respect him more. His reluctance to never show his true feelings made me distrust him that much more.

I, then continued on to the next person which was Carlisle, then his wife, etc. I put on a show that should have won me an Academy Award. [sighs] It's going to be a long day.

The reception was in full swing now. When it was time to make the best man's toast I did it without stumbling, without sounding too nervous. It was heartfelt and at the end got a little hard to finish. But I kept it short and sweet. My hands were trembling the whole time and I was glad I had written extra big just for that reason:

"Ladies and gentlemen. I want to thank you all for coming tonight. Sam and I have been friends for over 10 years. We used to sit around and wonder what we would grow up to be: Astronauts, doctors, fighter pilots. But I never heard him say, I want to be a good man. This was no surprise to the rest of us." Some people snickered here. "I guess that's because even if he didn't know it, no matter what he chose, we all knew he would be a 'good man'. He has proven himself to be not only a great friend, but a truly good person as well. I value my friendship with Sam. He's taught me a lot about life, love and leadership. I think when I grow up I want to be just like him." A sound of aww could be heard around the room. "Emily, you have made Sam SO happy. You've even tamed our motley crew with your humor, your patience and your unconditional love and made our little group what it is. We couldn't function without you. Sam's the luckiest guy I know. I wish you both health, happiness and long life. I love you guys; may God bless this union. To the bride and groom!"

Everyone raised their glasses and chanted, "To the bride and groom" and there was a huge round of applause that followed with a lot of "here-here's" and even more whooping and hollering, but it was most likely from the pack. I looked over at Emily and Sam after I finished reading and Emily was unsuccessfully holding back a stream of tears. Even Sam looked choked up, his eyes a little glassy.

I continued to ignore any glances from Edward's camp. Just keep up appearances, I reminded myself.

I danced occasionally, I ate, I pretended to be interested in dull conversation. I even noticed some girls here and there, who when I happened to look at them turned their heads just as fast, as if they didn't want me to know they were looking at me. A few smiled at me and I smiled back. I guess something I said or did got their attention.

All the rest of the reception went smoothly. After doing the whole cake thing, Sam and Em were dancing their eighth, ninth or 20th dance, I lost track. The party was winding down when I heard a familiar voice behind me say, "Would you care to dance?"

My heart jumped. I didn't expect to hear her beautiful voice and for that moment it was as if no time had passed. It felt the same way it always felt when it was just us two. Caught up in the surprise, I didn't have time to feel the ache that would surely come later.

Without turning around, smiling to myself, I said, "I'm not much of a dancer."

Bella moved in front of me, smiled, and said "Good, neither am I," and held out her hand. I'd forgotten how beautiful she was, is, always will be. So much so it hurt to look at her.

In spite of everything, in spite of our differences, in spite of the past and knowing what was to come, I loved her with my heart and soul. Even if our friendship's forever changed, that will never change for me. I took her hand trying not to feel any kind of way about it, just hoping I would make it through the next several minutes without doing something stupid.

It didn't escape my attention that this could be the last time we see each other, perhaps she realized the same. Even though it was prudent to try to distance ourselves, clearly that was something we couldn't do.

She led me out to the dance floor and even with the loud music and everyone talking over it, we had no problem hearing each other.

Neither of us said anything at first, clearly not sure how to start, but usually small talk is appropriate in awkward situations. I asked her how she'd been and if she liked the wedding. She asked about Billy and how I'd been. We commented on the cake and how it seemed a little dry, in fact the only thing dryer than the cake was this conversation. I think we might even have mentioned the weather once. It was sad. Basically a conversation we could have had with anybody. There was so much to say but neither of us could say it...at first.

"So how have you been, really? You look like shit, Jake."

I just laughed. "Well don't hold back on my account, darlin." We both laughed. And just like that the ice was broken.

"I'm fine, Bella, really. How 'bout you? They haven't turned you into a tick, I see."

Bella pretended to look annoyed and said, "No, not yet anyway. After the wedding."

I knew she meant after her wedding and was irked that she would even mention it. How can she be so nonchalant about ending everything good in her life?

Sam's words echoed in my head, "Maintain." I told myself, there's no point in arguing with her - she's too hardheaded. Change the subject.

But she beat me to it. "I see you've got some admirers," she said.

Not clear on what she meant, I followed her glance and there were several very pretty onlookers looking at us, probably curious about our status.

"Oh, well hmm," I said, a little embarrassed, not sure what to say. But when in doubt, make a joke.

"Yeah, well, when you've got it...," and I breathed on my fingernails and buffed them on my shirt.

Bella laughed freely.

"They've been checking you out most of the night. You should ask one to dance."

Scrunching my lips a little, I shrugged and said, "Maybe."

There was an uncomfortable pause.

"I really liked your toast by the way. It was beautiful."

"Yeah I've been getting a lot of compliments on that tonight. Bet you didn't know I was so eloquent. Who da thunk it?" I said. She laughed at me.

We talked about where I'd been for the last month. It was an uncomfortable subject at first, but I knew she was genuinely curious and wanted to know as much as possible. I told her about the lakes, the mountains, the meadows, all the wildlife and all the sunrises and sunsets out in the wilderness and the perfect blue of that eternal sky that seemed to go on forever. I talked of how breathtakingly beautiful it all was and how the air is so crisp and clean that when you're in the mountains, or even when you're not, the moon and the stars only seem a few feet away, as if you could reach up and touch them.

She asked why British Columbia, and I told her about all the hunting and camping trips me and dad used to go on back before he lost the use of his legs. I explained, "But you have to prepare yourself for the loneliness out there. You welcome it at first, but then…"

I stopped mid sentence because I was remembering it all. The incredible sadness that never seemed to stop. How you go there specifically for the solitude only to feel nothing but the loneliness in the end. It wasn't what I wanted after all, but I didn't know how to tell her that. Maybe I didn't have to. Her eyes looked down. It must have been something similar to what she felt when he left her that time.

"You couldn't have...called or wrote... something? Nobody seemed to know where you were or how you were?"

"Well there aren't a whole lot of cell towers where I was, Bella. Besides, that was the whole point. I didn't want to talk to anyone."

I heard her take a quick intake of breath and look away. I didn't want to hurt her, I didn't even want to talk about this but she insisted. Knowing Bella though, I knew she'd blame herself for everything, it was unavoidable. She seemed to like hurting herself more than necessary, a true glutton. Which was why I really didn't want to play the blame game. I figure there's enough of that to go around the world at least twice, along with all the would'ves and should'ves.

I wanted to tell her how much I missed her and thought about her out there. It was on the tip of my tongue but that would only hurt her. I could sense she had a lot to tell me, too, but couldn't. We seemed to be walking a fine invisible line.

"So what are your plans, Jake? Just school and stuff or did you plan to uh, go somewhere else, you know for a while?" Bella asked biting her lip, looking concerned.

How odd. Why is everyone so interested in my plans all of a sudden? I was somewhat amused at the coincidence. "It's funny you ask that. Sue had asked me the same thing just the other..." My face fell. I stopped dancing and stiffened up.

"Jacob, what's wrong?"

In that instant I realized exactly where this came from. I was hiding my thoughts from Edward but Sue wasn't, and she was here sitting at Billy's table.

Doesn't he know when to quit? Isn't anything sacred? I slammed a look into his eyes and thought as loud as I could, That was a private conversation, you damn stinking mind-reading bug! I saw him glare at me and stiffen up, clearly worried at what I would do. I could tell he was weighing his options. Oh sit down, you old fool! You know I'm not going to do anything, to Bella anyway!

I could see him clinching his jaw.

Beginning to fume, but gritting my teeth to stay in control, I said, "Look, when it becomes any of anybody's business about what my future plans are I'll send out a newsletter or put a frickin ad in the paper, all right? Seems to me you've got your own problems to worry about."

"Problems? What problems? What are you talking about?"

"Well for one thing you're freely marrying a serial killer, Bella, the same guy who's promised to kill you, albeit lovingly, I'm sure. I'd say that was a problem. But hey, I'm just funny that way."

"Would you keep it down! Charlie's right over there," Bella said angrily in hushed tones, motioning over where Charlie was visiting with Billy not 30 feet away.

Biting my lip and cussing under my breath I knew she was right. Fuck me! I did it again. Shit! This is not how I wanted our last meeting to go. I immediately felt horrible about wasting our last moment together. I grabbed her hand, halting her retreat.

"Wait! You're right. I'm sorry, Bells, really," my eyes desperately pleading with her. And I was sorry, more sorry than anyone could know.

"The last thing I want to do is fight with you. I swear to God, Bells. You know that, right?" I was being as sincere as I knew how to be, surely she would see that and forgive me. The time for games was over. I'd conceded. There was nothing left to do except try to make our last memory a good one.

She didn't say anything at first, just took my hand and we began to dance again. As I hoped, she saw that I was sincere. But even so, normally she would be fighting with me by now. There's usually more fight in her than this. Something's changed in her. The stress in her face was showing. This was about more than our little tiff.

"What's wrong, Bells?" She just continued to look away. I pressed on, "Okay, your turn to spill. Something's eating at you. What is it, Bella?" She was reluctant to tell me anything.

"It's nothing, really."

I just rolled my eyes. I knew better than this and Bella knew it too. I hadn't noticed before but Bella looked different as well. Jittery, almost to the point of being on edge. It was as if she was hanging on by a thread and my question unnerved her, stripping away her last defensive shield. She was exposed now. No matter how hard Bella tried to avoid making eye contact with me it was too late, I had already seen the circles under them.

I put my hand on the small of her back and we danced slower, "Please Bella," I whispered, "I want to know what's wrong."

"Okay, I'd lie about it but you wouldn't believe me anyway. I've been having a lot of nightmares, lately. Nothing big."

Nightmares…that's all? She's downplaying it so they must be really bad.

"Let me be the judge of that, okay? What are they about?"

She reluctantly recounted her latest recurring dream, the one where she's the vampire that kills the lady. "It's just been keeping me from getting any good sleep is all. I'm exhausted." She was relaxed enough that she couldn't stifle a yawn. "Carlisle wants to give me something to help me sleep more soundly but I don't want it. I've heard some scary things about some of that stuff. And I want to be able to wake up easily, you know. Besides, it wouldn't stop the dreams."

I could tell the memory of this most recent dream really disturbed her. "Well, yeah I don't blame you. That sounds horrible to me. You poor kid."

Even in your sleep you can't away from these monsters.

"I'll be all right. I've just been mostly worried about you."

"I know."

She did a double take. "You know? How would you know that?"

I laughed, "Who do you think you're talking to? I know you, Bella. You worry about everybody but yourself even when it's not necessary. Honestly Bells, I'm fine." As soon as I said that and Bella looked away, I caught Sue's eye. She saw who I was dancing with and just nodded back as if to understand.

"So, I'm a little confused, Bells. Everything you're describing to me fits 100% in with what being a vampire is all about. You've been around them long enough to know what vampire life is like, what to expect. Why is this all of a sudden scaring you?" It was a valid question, and she knew it.

Just when she was about to answer, they announced the couple were getting ready to leave for their honeymoon so we'd all better assemble by the door to throw the birdseed for the send off.

We laughed at the birdseed thing, silly wedding rituals at such a moment.

We decided to forgo the birdseed and spend one more minute dancing. We were now the last ones on the floor and I was beginning to feel the finality of the moment. Time was slipping away.

There was so much to say...why couldn't I just say it?

She looked at me and looked away as if hiding another secret. She then laid her head on my chest and just listened to my heart for a while. I lowered my head to rest my cheek on top of her head, exhaling deeply. Our arms wrapped around each other. Our hearts slowed down, it was as if they were trying to keep time. We just stood there swaying, not saying a word. Every time I thought of something to say it wouldn't come out, afraid to burst the bubble, I think.

Finally finding my voice, I said, "You look beautiful tonight by the way." I knew she'd balk at that. She never saw what I saw.

I heard her sniff and laugh a little. She also had to find her voice it seems. "Thanks," she said, never meeting my eyes. "Did I mention how handsome you look in that tux?" Another sniff.

My voice cracking, feeling suddenly thick, "Not in so many words. I hope our dancing this long doesn't get you in trouble." It was true, I didn't want any trouble for her. I was tired of the games.

"It's fine, really. He knows I wanted to finish saying my last...um, he knows I wanted to say..."

I panicked when she said that. No goodbyes, not yet! Not wanting to hear it I let go and started to pull away from her but she resisted.

"Not yet," she said with tears in her eyes.

Maybe being with her weakens me, like Samson. Had she always been this strong? Maybe my strength isn't what it used to be.

She loved me still, I could feel it. And I loved her more than ever. Our time apart did nothing to erase that. I couldn't feel the hollowness, the dead quiet inside me anymore. All I could feel was her hand, holding onto mine, asking me for one more moment. It was the sweetest most complete feeling of love I've ever felt. And even though part of me knew this was coming to an end…I wanted this moment, I needed it. How could I say no?

One look into her tear-filled eyes and I was done. Swallowing hard, my eyes and nose stinging now, I hugged her and held her tight, and she did the same. The word "no" kept screaming in my head, it wouldn't stop. I was pleading with her in my mind, Don't do this! Marry him if that's what you want, but don't turn yourself into those things. Don't become something ... I have to kill. Please!

The helplessness was excruciating. Laying my face on top of her head, my breathing became uneven and I could feel the first tear trickle down my cheek. I didn't care who saw it. I didn't care that the music had stopped. This was our moment, no one else's. At the same time, her breathing had turned into short gasps and I could feel moisture on my shirt. Bella's crying broke what was left of my heart in two. I cradled her head to my chest and kissed her hair. All the things we weren't saying, weren't allowed to say, we were saying it now - and we understood.

We didn't bother to sway anymore. I really don't know how long we were there when I looked up and noticed nearly everyone was gone, just the clean up crew trying to make sense of all the mess.

Kissing her hair several more times, I said, "It's time, baby. They're gonna kick us out soon." She nodded. Breathing in one more whiff of her hair - it would have to hold me - we released each other and the sudden whoosh of cool air that hit me where she had once been felt like the wrongest thing in the world. I wondered if it felt the same to her.

All this time, all the things I had been agonizing over, it all hit me at once. I'll never see her again. Nothing prepared me for how this would feel, what this kind of pain feels like. All the movies, all the songs, all those stories of love and loss…none of that comes close to how it really is. Nothing prepares you for this.

Even though I'm tempted, I won't kiss her goodbye, only if she stayed. I knew if I kissed her, I'd never let her go. It hurts enough as it is, knowing that even now she still chooses him. Instead, I picked her up and embraced her. Her arms wrapped tight around my neck and we held on to each other. I know I must have been burning her cheek, but she never let go, not one time. My tears mixed in with hers. We stayed like that while the tears flowed. Then, they stopped.

Our time was up.

Soon after, I walked with her hand-in-hand outside, like old times, and released her to her bloodsucker waiting patiently by the car. I had to admit, it was really decent of him to let us have that time. I felt grateful to him, I even said thanks to him in my mind. He nodded at me and looked away, then muttered something too low for human hearing to pick up:

"For her, it's all for her," he didn't say it with anger or spite, he said it like it hurt him to say it.

Saying goodbye was on the tip of my tongue but nothing came out. It was the same for her.

As she was about to get into his car I saw her mouth some words to me. It would be my last memory of her. She smiled a pained smile. I smiled one back and nodded. As they drove off, I watched the flicker of his taillights growing dimmer in the distance.

I watched them go, and with a knot in my stomach, I replayed the memory that had been lurking within me.

Just before they left, she mouthed, "Bye, Jacob" she paused and then said, "My Jacob," and placed her hand over her heart.

Emily's story of letting go rang true. I finally understood the real purpose of it. Thanks, Em.

Still standing there watching the lights disappear, I swallowed hard and whispered into the night air:

"Good-bye."

The car's taillights made one last flicker and then it was gone.

A/N: Disclaimer, the characters setting and familiar situations belong to Stephanie Meyer. No copyright infringement intended. I'm not making any monetary profit from this AT ALL.

***Although it's sad, this is probably my favorite chapter out of all of them. I hope you liked it. I agonized on whether to give them their kiss here. I even tried it a few different ways but it seemed forced. But good things come to those who wait, so stick around, and a million thanks to my readers for doing just that :).