A/N: Whoa, you guys are so cool. I had my biggest number of reviews yet (hurray!) - so I have to give huge, huge thanks to Ikuni Hattori, dragon19kyoshi, StoryMaster64, and DaLover. I appreciate you so much, especially for taking the time to review - it is really, really inspiring. THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!

Having sent for Toadette to convey the dinner request to the kitchen (as the princess was in no condition to wander the halls in her clothes), Peach found herself well and truly alone in her bedroom. She wrapped herself in a comfy robe, leaving the gown and shoes to dry on the balcony, and lay down on her side. Her shoulders were bruised, and her head ached. It seemed like another life - to think she'd woken so early this morning in Bowser's lands to prepare for her race. She was so thoroughly exhausted, and sore all over, that all she wanted to do was curl up and sleep. But she couldn't. It occurred to her, safe and warm and alone, that Bowser hadn't fallen in the moat. He must've jumped, and she didn't understand why. Why fetch her crown? Why help her wade through the water? Why put out the fire he caused? She didn't even know he could swim, and he looked so strange without his shell. Did he often remove it? Was that an improper question to dwell upon? She didn't know what the physiological standards of modesty were with...koopas, and oh, come to think of it, she didn't really want to think on that at all.

There were plenty of other things to consider. Her confusion aside, not only had she failed to give a proper tour - but she'd also failed in learning anything of use about his spells and schemes. As she dried and styled her hair with nimble fingers, Peach gave herself a very good talking to. Dinner would be better. She would find out everything she needed to know to contact Mario, and to rid her castle of Bowser's presence.

She couldn't believe he threw her (yes, retrospectively, now she was seeing it that way) in the water.

How fortunate was she that the moat was not, in fact, filled with lava, or any manner of hungry beasts. He really was the most awful creature she'd ever encountered.

"Princess?" And he was outside her room. She heard his voice in tandem with an obnoxiously loud thunk of his closed fist against her door. Peach smoothed down her full-bodied evening gown with pink satin gloves, sliding on shoes with pink topaz set in the design. They were lovely, and she always felt wonderful when she wore them. She'd chosen to dress up in this way not for Bowser but for herself - today had been one discomforting experience after another, and she'd certainly looked her worst. By dressing up, she reminded herself of how confident and competent she could be, that she was fully capable of turning these mistakes around for the greater good. Pretty shoes really did have a power all their own.

But was it enough power to face what was on the other side of that wall? Peach didn't really have a choice, so she opened the door mid-knock as he grew impatient, waiting for her. "Hello, Bowser."

She didn't know why he seemed so surprised - did he not think she was in her room? What she didn't expect was to see her white gloves in his still-clenched fist, half-raised to bang on the door. She'd almost forgotten she'd left them outside, but she wasn't sure how she felt about Bowser being the one to bring them back.

"You look...great." Peach broke eye contact, uncomfortable with how intently he looked at her when he said that - were it anyone else, she might have been pleased, but it was Bowser. And since he'd already told her this - when she was in a bike suit, covered in blooper ink - she wasn't sure she could trust his judgment on what looked 'great'. Not that she trusted his judgment. Or him. At all.

Peach didn't want to thank him for the compliment - she didn't want a compliment from him at all, so instead she asked about the gloves, "Are those mine?"

"Oh! Yeah, I...yeah, they were outside. Here." Smooth. Bowser felt the brush of her fingertips against his scales as he released a slow, heavy breath. He was hungry, he'd been waiting to eat for what felt like days - it put him in a bad mood, especially when Old Hagface wouldn't get off his case about trying to drown the princess, which he hadn't, alright, she just slipped - and now he felt like he'd starve for a week just to look at her.

Well, maybe not a week...but she looked really good.

Bowser followed her into her bedroom.

Not for that reason...though it wasn't like he hadn't thought about it - but he figured he wasn't likely to get a chance to see it again anytime soon. The Koopa King didn't always take her from the balcony, but when he did, usually he was more interested in getting her out of the castle as quickly as possible. He didn't exactly stick around for decorating tips. Now he had the chance to get a good look around - there was a lot of pink. No surprise. He would've thought, hey, it was perfect for her - if not for the glaring mistake on her wall. The only non-pink thing in the whole damn room - and what was it? Mario.

"You got a picture of him in your bedroom?"

"Bowser!"

He promised himself he wouldn't yell at her again, but- "This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen!" Ignoring the princess' indignation at the intrusion, Bowser stepped up close to the painting with a disgusted grimace on his face. Whose bright idea was it to immortalize that ugly plumber in a portrait? The artist probably went blind just looking at him - and what was with the idiotic stance? And his face?

"Get out! Don't you have any manners at all?"

"Are you serious about this?" Bowser turned on her with a glower that was half anger, and half revulsion. Peach only blushed - hard - and yeah, rightfully so. She should've been more than embarrassed. "It doesn't even go with anything else in the room!"

Bowser, King of the Koopas and excellent judge of style in his spare time. Was there anything he couldn't do?

According to Peach? Plenty. "Stop it!"

He was not listening. If she wanted a portrait of a real hero, he could've gotten her one. He could've gotten her a statue - ten statues! "I oughta do you a favor and scorch this piece of crap!" He couldn't stand it, the thought of anything even remotely connected to Mario being in her bedroom. Or anywhere near her. That fat oaf didn't deserve to be on her wall - unless he was getting stomped into it by Bowser.

"Don't you dare, Bowser Koopa!" Peach had it commissioned herself - and Mario had been very humbled by it, he'd turned red in the most endearing way from the tips of his ears to his cheeks.

Now Bowser didn't get why she was all worked up over it - he was doing a good thing, really upping the market value of this place by getting rid of bad 'art'. "Why not, huh? It's not like he's some big movie star!" Or athlete, or king. He was just some loser who fixed toilets for a living, and occasionally stuck his big nose where it didn't belong. "Doesn't it give you nightmares?"

Bowser had no sense of personal space, or of common courtesy to other people. A lady's bedroom was private - and had Peach known that she needed to close and lock her door for the couple minutes it would take her to lay the gloves out on the balcony, gather her courage, she would have. She just assumed that Bowser wasn't so- when he shouted, it scared her. She was torn between fear of him and impatience with him. He made it so difficult for her to pretend to be cordial, especially when he insulted the man who'd saved her so many times before.

"The only thing," Peach replied crossly, "that gives me nightmares is you." There was only so much that a princess could tolerate in one day.

Bowser wasn't insulted by the retort. In fact, he smirked. And she had no idea why until he drawled, "So...you dream about me?"

The princess flushed an even deeper pink. "You are insufferable." And? "I'm going to dinner." With that, she stormed past him - out of the room. That wasn't a no. He wasn't as ticked off any more - and he cast a competitive glare in the portrait's direction. He didn't set it on fire, but he couldn't resist slashing one claw through the belly of the picture, a long, papery tear. Too bad he didn't get to disembowel the real thing (not yet, anyway). Then he turned and followed the princess - before she realized what he'd done. He didn't want to ruin their meal together.

It only took him a few strides to catch up with her, his steps more than thrice her own. She didn't talk to him, but that was hardly out of the ordinary - and Bowser cleared his throat once before prompting, "Peach?"

"Yes?" Peach had fumed long enough - she knew she couldn't let her personal feelings on the matter cloud what she needed to do: convince Bowser to confide in her, to tell her what he wanted. So, like so many princesses before her, she feigned a graciousness she did not feel.

Bowser held open the door to her - for which she thanked him with a slight bob of her head. The informal dining room was better suited to intimate meals between 'friends', and despite their exhaustion, the kitchen staff had performed admirably. The glistening chandelier was lit, casting the entire room with a calm and comforting golden light, while the mahogany wood table had been set with its white lace tablecloth, sterling silver cutlery, and candelabra. There were no Toads in sight, but she knew without a doubt that the food had only just been set out moments ago - her staff was quite talented in the art of subtlety (and it certainly didn't hurt that none of them wished to be in Bowser's presence, and so acted with extraordinary presentiment so that the dinner guests need not ask for anything).

"So, uh," there wasn't a good way to 'ease' her into it, and Bowser gave up trying. "The kids are coming over."

Peach took her seat - which had already been pulled out for her - but faltered slightly. "What?" What kids? His kids? "The Koopalings?" All of them? She hadn't seen them since her birthday - and had mixed feelings at the thought of their...'coming over'. Here. To her castle.

"Yeah," he sensed - or heard, since the reluctance was obvious in her voice - that she wasn't exactly happy about it, and considered an apology. For about two seconds. "Didn't want to leave them at home, knowing whose gonna come looking for you." It wasn't that Bowser didn't think his kids could handle the Stupid Brothers, but King Boo was supposed to be on top of it. He wanted the Koopalings with him - and besides, he added awkwardly, "They miss you." Their Mama Peach. "Especially Junior."

Junior. Oh yes, she remembered him. All of them. It wasn't that Peach didn't like them, nor did she blame them for...really, such an unfortunate upbringing. In fact, she was surprised they turned out...so well, having Bowser as their only role model. She'd just never spent very much time with them - and was worried. Not to mention, it probably would've helped her if Mario had managed to find one, assuming the children knew what their father was up to. And she wasn't sure how she felt about Bowser's claim that they "missed" her.

"Oh." What else could she say? "Alright." Peach picked up her knife and fork, but before she could cut into her food-

"What isth this?" Bowser. The words came out muffled because he was speaking around half his dinner, which he'd shoveled into his mouth in one big bite. Peach looked up to see his movements mirroring hers, though he had some trouble grasping such small silverware between his claws - but he looked less than pleased, cheeks puffed out with a mouthful of something. She had to look away, so she didn't have to see chewed bits of shroom as he spoke.

"It's a Dyllis Special," with a few tweaks from her chefs, Peach explained calmly, looking anywhere but at the bad-mannered Koopa across from her, "Roasted shroom and a mango-stuffed hamburger basted in shroom broth on a horsetail salad." It was one of her favorites, and one of the few recipes which included a taste of meat. She was certain the kitchen staff had included that for Bowser's benefit.

"What?" Catching sight of Peach's expression, he forced himself to swallow before saying anything else - but once he had? "You put fruit in your hamburger?" She just nodded. Urgh. That's what he tasted. It was just wrong. You didn't put anything in meat but meat - not some super sweet, uh, what'd she call it? Mango? Mango? Evil tyrants of his caliber didn't eat mango. Or salad. What a pansy dish. "You got any real steak?"

Peach held up a finger as she finished off a much smaller, ladylike bite. She couldn't savor the flavor, because of her company - but it was still delicious. "Mushrooms are our staple crop, Bowser," she reminded him, as if her kingdom's name was not indicative enough, "We have a predominantly vegetarian culinary culture."

"So...no steak?" No wonder everybody was so puny around here, they didn't eat any protein.

She gave him a look. "I'll see what I can do." It was the most diplomatic answer. "Don't you like it?"

Not really. Still, he figured it'd be a jerk move to insult the princess' food choices. Bluntly, anyway. "I'll eat it," Bowser hedged dryly. He could eat anything, but he expected a big steak tomorrow to make up for this - and none of that fruity crap either. With that settled (at least to himself), the two ate in silence for a few minutes.

Peach would have liked to complete the whole meal in silence - then she could return to her room - but she didn't have that luxury. She had responsibilities. "Bowser," she said, sipping the tea accompanying her dinner. The cup was dainty and warm in her hands, and the smell reminded her of home.

"Hm?" He was scooping up - in a bothersome way, if you asked her - the last of the salad dressing off his plate in long, squeaky scrapes of his fork tines, but he thankfully paused at the sound of her voice.

"What do you want?" Bowser's fork hit his plate with a clatter, for reasons Peach didn't care to guess, and she elaborated, "Here, in the castle. What are you looking for?" He wouldn't have gone through all this if there weren't a justifiable (in his eyes) reason. If it had just been a routine (was there such a thing?) kidnapping, he probably wouldn't have done it during the Cup. And he certainly wouldn't have brought her back here. "Maybe I can help," she offered, to which Bowser snorted disbelievingly.

"So you can get rid of me faster?"

Peach didn't try to deny it - because she didn't think he would believe her if she had, but she did say something to ease the practicality of her offer. Setting down her tea cup, Peach admitted softly, "I really would like to compete on Rainbow Road." If she could not contact Mario, the next best thing would be to give Bowser what he wanted (provided she could) so that he would leave, Stars willing. She suspected the team race would probably be suspended this year because of what he had done, but the individual race would be held on Wednesday. That was three days away. The awards ceremony would be on Thursday, and the festivities would last through the weekend - assuming things weren't postponed.

Not gonna happen, Princess. He had no intention of letting her go - but he couldn't tell her that. She'd run off crying to her room, where she'd swoon over that stupid picture of Mario. That really drove him nuts.

"But you don't have a bike anymore." Crap. Bowser was doing the best he could not to remind her what he'd done - that was stupid.

He braced himself for the worst, but Peach merely paused mid-bite to reply, "I always bring a second bike. Toadsworth has my Standard." Toadsworth. If only he were here, she wouldn't feel so unsure of herself. "It would be ideal for the last race, actually. It has much better handling," than the Mach, "which is wonderful on those turns."

"Yeah," Bowser agreed, "But nothing beats the speed of my Flame Runner, and winning's all that matters." It was the only reason he raced - first place - that and the chance to blow the Stupid Brothers (and anybody else in his way) sky high. Peach didn't say anything, put off by his cockiness - and Bowser regretted it, since he realized he'd never heard her talk about the way she handled her bikes.

It made her even more attractive, and Bowser was eager not to end the conversation prematurely. "You're a good racer," he blurted out. Not as good as me, but... "But I didn't think you knew...about that stuff."

Peach raised an eyebrow, trying to ignore the fact that she was flattered he thought so. This was Bowser. "What stuff? Handling? Drift?" Yes. King Koopa wouldn't be the first person she'd ever met who didn't think she knew one end of a bike from the other. Peach, however, involved herself two-fold in every activity she undertook: both the practical and the theoretical. As a princess, it was expected that she not only be able to perform, but also discuss that which she took an interest in. While such a well-rounded formula was typically related to the arts - such as music, painting, or dance - she saw no reason why it should not also apply to racing. "Why?"

She patiently waited for his response - in the past, Bowser had fantasized about Peach hanging off his every word (as opposed to ignoring him, or screaming, or sobbing so loudly he couldn't hear himself think), but now wasn't one of those times. "Because you're, uh...a princess." And he thought she'd have other things on her mind - like dresses and parties and...crowns.

"So is Daisy," Peach reminded him, ignoring his under-the-breath comment on the matter, "And she can talk your ear off about manual drift on a Dolphin Dasher. She knows a lot more than I do."

Bowser didn't want to hear about what Buttercup-Tulip-whatever-her-name-was (he knew it, but pretended he didn't because she got on his nerves so much) knew. She wasn't his type - if she didn't have a crown, you wouldn't even think she was royalty. She belonged with those plumbers a heck of a lot more than Peach did, she even talked like them. Not with the dumb accent, but she could sound low-class. Bowser didn't like her, and not just for the 'creative' nicknames she came up with for him. She was loud and belligerent and annoying. The Koopa King had long since placed Peach on a pedestal, and not just for her wealth and her beauty; he wanted to protect her, too. She made him feel stronger because he had to be gentle with her.

In theory, anyway. Didn't keep him from accidentally knocking her into a moat - but even then, the shove was gentle. If it'd been one of the Mario Brothers, Bowser would've smashed him into the side of the castle.

"Good for her." I don't care. Did he sound bored enough?

Peach put down her silverware carefully, his impoliteness making it quite easy for her to remember that this was not a social visit. "Bowser." It hadn't escaped her notice that he dodged her questions, so she repeated the most important one, "What do you want?" Please tell me.

Not that again. Bowser stifled a growl, shoving his empty plate away so that he could brace his elbows on the table. Kamek had discouraged him from mentioning "certain ritualistic provisions which might upset a princess of her sensibilities and render her less cooperative". Whatever. So Bowser knew he could refuse, scare her into keeping her questions to herself, lock her up if she protested until he needed her - and that was all well and good if he wanted her to hate him forever. He didn't.

"I'll show you," he grudgingly promised, figuring he'd just bring the princess to Kamek and be done with it. "After dinner."

That was all the incentive that Peach needed - she promptly pushed her plate aside, as Bowser had done moments before. "I'm finished."

He scowled at her expectant look, glanced at his empty plate, then threw his head back and bellowed, "Well I'm not! Can we get some REFILLS out here!" It was more a command than a question, and Bowser scoffed: she didn't really think one mango burger (and some salad) was enough for him, did she?

As frightened Mushroom attendants scurried into the room, he pretended not to notice the disappointed slump in her shoulders. Bring on the second course.