I'm in a very good mood after reading a very good fic – Nobody Sees Me Wishing by DigiqueenTMIM – go check it out, it's one of my faves! So anyway, I'm in a good mood and fancied updating (:
Chapter 6
Lily's POV
I avoided James all day, my eyes not leaving my work whenever he was near me. When he wasn't looking I sneaked glances at him. He looked confused, worried even. I felt exactly the same. I don't know what came over me last night, it was as though we were two different people, sat there by the lake. There was something there – a spark – that was gone this morning. Now all I thought when I looked at him was 'How could you Lily?'
I was being an idiot. I let my guard down to a boy. I told myself I'd never do that again. I don't need boys interfering in my life. I've got plenty more to worry about. NEWTs, the war, my sister hating my guts, Head Girl duties. I don't need any more hassle. But last night, as I sat in silence, looking at the stars, I'd felt something, something comforting. I recognised that feeling. I hadn't felt it in a while, not since Severus started getting involved with them.
I've always seemed to let the wrong boys in. If Potter was less of an idiot, maybe I'd try harder, but he'd proved himself to be unreliable one time too many. I didn't want another broken heart, did I?
After dinner in the Great Hall, I hurried to Professor McGonnagall's office. When I entered, James was already there, sat in front of her desk. He gave me a faint smile. I didn't return it.
"Now that you've joined us, Miss Evans. I was just expressing to Mr Potter how shocked I am at your behaviour."
I sat in the chair next to James, and stared into my lap.
"In your entire career at this school you've given nothing short of your best. Then it comes to the final, most crucial year, and you're out in the grounds at all hours! I expect no better from Mr Potter here, but Miss Evans, what in the name of Merlin has got into you?"
"I-I don't know, Professor." I mumbled.
That was obviously the wrong thing to say.
"You don't know?" She barked, "You DON'T KNOW! Miss Evans, you are an intelligent girl, why else would you be chosen for Head Girl. If you don't know why you behave in such as manner, I may have to suggest to Professor Dumbledore that he reconsider the post of Head Girl. Is that what you want?"
"No, Professor." I muttered.
"Professor, it wasn't Lily's fault. I practically forced her to come out with me," James started.
"Mr Potter, I've told you once and I'll tell you again. You are NOT responsible for Miss Evans' behavior!"
"But it's my fault, Professor."
"Enough! Miss Evans, is this true?"
I stayed silent. It wasn't entirely James' fault, she was right, I could make decisions for myself. Or that's what I thought. At the moment I haven't a bloody clue what's going on.
"Well?" McGonnagoll barked.
"She's afraid to answer, Professor. She doesn't want to get me in trouble."
Professor McGonnagoll scoffed, "I find that hard to believe Potter. Miss Evans here knows what your record is like, I highly doubt she would worry about adding another black mark to it. Miss Evans, explain yourself."
What was I supposed to say.
"He's right, professor. I didn't want to be there, but Potter dragged me."
McGonnagall looked like she didn't believe a word I was saying, but she nodded anyway.
"Very well then. You can go."
I was surprised she didn't make us scrub something clean or write lines, but I was grateful even so. I hurried out of the office before James had got out of his seat. I couldn't be around him, it was just too weird. I didn't feel comfortable like I did last night. I just felt stupid.
I know some of the tenses are a bit muddled, but I like it that way. Lily's thinking's a bit muddle at the moment, so you know. Please review, I'm struggling with this a bit at the moment, but I'm determined that something good will happen soon enough.
The next chapter might skip a few weeks, to move the story along a bit. And in a few chapters there's going to be a Halloween Party...involving firewhisky. Any ideas what might happen?