A/N: Hi everyone,

Thanks to everyone who reviewed the last chapter. And for those of you reading Broken On the Inside , inspiration still hasn't hit me. Hopefully it'll start again, when the new episodes for Criminal Minds and NCIS: LA come back on, but other than that…not much happening right now.

Enjoy!

Chapter Three: I Hate You Phil Wenneck

Angelica loaded the phones with the quarters that the guys had given her. She needed to call Tracy. They were stuck in the Las Vegas Police Precinct and as of right now, it didn't look like they were getting out anytime soon, and with Doug nowhere to be found, she, being the bride's best friend and groom's twin sister, was elected to convince Tracy that it would be a good idea for them to stay another night. It was times like these, that she wondered if she did something wrong in a past life.

"After we take the mug shots, we bring them down here," said one of the officers, that was showing a group of kids around the Precinct, "where they wait to be interviewed by the arresting officers. Trust me, kids, you do not wanna be sitting on these benches. We call this place is Loserville." The kids laughed as they walked by. One, slightly obese kid whipped out his cell phone took a picture of Alan, who then proceeded to kick it out of the child's hand.

"Hello."

"Hey Trac! It's Ang."

"Hey, Angie. Where are you guys?"

"We are at the…spa at the hotel," Angelica lied, glaring at Phil, for putting her in this position.

"Cool. We're just getting some sun. Is Doug around?"

"Of course. Why wouldn't he be around," she asked a little too quickly.

"I'm just wondering why you're calling me."

"A girl can't call her best friend, especially who talked me into spending time with my," she paused, "bastard of an ex-boyfriend." Phil smacked her arm, causing her to look at him. She glared at him, sticking her tongue out, before going back to her conversation with Tracy.

"Besides, they made a deal, no talking to girlfriends or ex-wives, so I was told to call all of you, minus Melissa, since she doesn't know I'm here."

"Okay. What's up?"

"Uh, you are not gonna believe this. Doug got comped an extra night at the hotel."

"You did?"

"Yeah. The suite is…It's ridiculous. It's out of control," she then continued to mumble something that both Tracy and the guys didn't quite understand, "There's like, room service and a butler. I mean, just the works. So, they were thinking of spending the night and since they're my ride back to Pasadena and we're just gonna come back in the morning."

"You all wanna stay an extra night? But the wedding's tomorrow and that means spending extra time with Phil."

"Don't remind me, but it's not like I have much choice, it's four against one. And that's why I'm going to make sure we get up early and we'll be back in plenty of time."

"Okay. Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"Wenneck, Price, Garner, Billings. Room 3," they heard an officer call. Angelica turned and looked at the officer.

"Okay, Trace, I gotta go. We'll talk to you tom-later." It took a while for the foursome to get to a point where they could see where they were going, but eventually they got there, and walked towards the room, that they would be interviewed in.

All four of them sat on one side of the table. Angelica began rubbing her wrists, since they were so raw from the handcuffs.

"Gentleman and Lady, we've got some good news and we've got some bad news," said the male cop, as he handed his partner her file, "The good news is we found your Mercedes. " The three guys began to laugh, Angelica however knew something was wrong, she had met cops like this before and it didn't usually end up being a not so bad thing, for the people in their position.

"Yeah, it's over at impound right now. We picked it up at 5 am this morning, parked in the middle of Las Vegas Boulevard." Angelica's eyes grew wide. She definitely did not like where this was going.

"In the middle," Phil muttered, "That's weird."

"Yeah, that is weird. There was also a note," the officer paused. Angelica groaned and put her head on the table. What stupid thing did they do now?

"It say, uh, 'Couldn't find a meter, but here's four bucks.' The bad news is…we can't get you in front of a judge until Monday morning," the officer explained. Angelica sat up. It was now time for her to shine. She was after all a lawyer.

"Oh, no, uh officer, that's just impossible, " she explained, "No, my clients and I need to be in LA tomorrow for a wedding."

"You stole a police car," said the female officer.

"We didn't steal anything," Stu explained, "Um, we found it." It was then that Angelica just closed her eyes. She was going to try and get them to settle this quick and quietly and now the three stooges were going to start speaking up. It was a good thing, she was not their actual lawyers.

"Yeah, if anything, we deserve a reward or something, like a trophy," said Alan. Angelica banged her head against the table. She counted to ten, before she threw her head back up again.

"I see assholes like you every day," the male officer snapped.

"Every fucking day," the female officer agreed.

"Let's go to Vegas, we'll all get drunk and laid! Yeah. Whoo! Woo-hoo. Woo-hoo. Let's steal a cop car, because it'd be really fucking funny," said both officers at the sametime. It was then that Angelica knew who she was dealing with. Idiot cops who just got pleasure wearing the badge…wonderful.

"Think your gonna get away with it," asked the female officer, "Not up in here."

"Not up in here," yelled the male officer."

"Uh," Angelica stumbled, "Sir, if I may, um…I'm assuming that, that squad car belongs to one of you."

"Yeah," answered the male officer.

"Yeah," Angelica said, "Look, my husband's not a cop and I'm just a small town lawyer. We're no heroes. He's just a schoolteacher. But if one of his kids went missing on a field trip…and if I lost the notes on a high profile case, that would look really bad on us."

"What are you getting at," asked one of the officers.

"Yeah, Ang, what are you getting at," asked Phil.

"No one wants to look bad. We gotta get to a wedding and you guys don't need people talking about how some obnoxious tourist borrowed your squad car last night. But look, the point is, I think we can work out a…deal. Discreetly of course, ma'am," Angelica smiled, "What do you say?" The two officers shared a look and then the female officer looked down at her clipboard, pointing at something on it. The male officer looked down at it, laughing and then to Angelica and the guys.

"Let me ask you a question," he said, "Do, uh, any of you gentlemen or you young lady have a heart condition or anything like that?" Angelica turned her head to side.

"I'm two months pregnant," she lied, not liking where this was going. Phil looked at her.

"No-OW!" Angelica kicked him under the table. She smiled at the officers innocently. The rest of the guys shook their heads, clearly not seeing where this was going.

Angelica sat in the back, while Stu, Phil and Alan stood at the front of the make-shift classroom, where there were a bunch of kids sitting and waiting patiently.

"Okay, kids, you're in for a really good treat today," the officer explained, "These gentleman have kindly volunteered to demonstrate how a stun gun is used to subdue a suspect." Angelica's eyes went wide. She was so glad that she was a quick enough thinker and could read people, to bad for the guys though. All the kids oohed, while the three guys, looked at the cop.

"That's right," he said.

"Wait a sec," Stu stammered.

"What?"

"Now, there's two ways to use a stun gun. Up close and personal," he paused and stunned Stu. He let out this girlish scream, before he fell to the ground, causing everyone in the room, minus Alan and Phil to laugh.

"What the fuck," Phil asked. He looked to Angelica, who was hiding her face in her hands, trying her best to keep her laughter quiet.

"Or you can shoot it from a distance. Now, do I have any volunteers? You wanna come up here and so some shooting? Huh," he asked, "All right, how about you, young lady? Come on up here. All right." The officer pointed to a young girl with her dark hair in pigtails. Angelica smiled at Phil, who just grimaced.

"Let's go, handsome, come on," the officer called to Phil, but then Alan stepped up. Angelica almost laughed loudly when she saw that.

"Not you fat Jesus, slide it on back," the officer said, when he saw Alan stepping up, "You, pretty boy." He was pointing to Phil. Angelica's eyes went wide and she had to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from laughing. Phil walked slowly up to stand in front of the girl

"Now, it's really simple," the cop explained, "All you gotta do is point, aim and shoot. All right?" The little girl nodded, while Phil stood in front of her.

"Okay, look. You don't really wanna do this," Phil said, trying to talk the little girl out of doing it. Angelica wanted to tell her that she should so bad. She may have forgiven Phil, but she still hasn't forgotten. She wanted this to hurt and she wanted it to hurt bad.

"You can do this. Just focus," the cop said. The little girl looked to him and nodded.

"Don't listen to this maniac. Let's think this thing through," Phil said, obviously not seeing where the girl was pointing the stun gun. Angelica quickly noticed. She walked up to the little girl and tapped her on the shoulder. Phil thought she was trying to save him and smiled

"Sweetie, can you do me a favour and point it down a bit," she whispered. The little girl nodded.

"Finish him," the cop yelled and the girl shot. It got Phil right in the genitals. Angelica cringed for him, while he fell writhing to the floor. The cops were laughing.

"Right in the nuts," the cop joked, "That was beautiful." The kids all started laughing.

"Well done. Give her a hand, everybody," the cop instructed. Angelica didn't clap, just walked slowly up to Phil to make sure that he was alright, when she was satisfied, she walked back to her spot along the back wall. Alan began to clap with the cops, but soon stopped when he saw the look Angelica was giving him.

"Good, hey we got one more charge left. Anybody want to do some shooting up here," the officer asked. All the kids began to raise their hands. The officer pointed to the kid that had taken the picture of Alan earlier.

"How about you, big man," he asked, "Come on up here." The office handed the stun gun to the kid and showed him how to properly hold it, so that he wouldn't get stunned himself.

"Okay, same instruction," he explained, "Just point, aim and shoot." The kid began to slowly raise the stun gun, the small red dot raising higher and higher until it landed on Alan's face.

"There you go. That's the stuff," the cop said, as he watched the kid, "I like the intensity. Eye of the tiger. Good. You're holding 50,000 volts, little man. Don't be afraid to ride the lightning." The kid shot the gun and it hit Alan in the face, but unlike Stu and Phil. He didn't go down.

"In the face! In the face," the officer shouted. All the cops began laughing, but Alan slowly began to walk towards the little boy.

"Oh, he's still up. He's still up," the cop said, as they watched him. The kids began to get scared. They began screaming.

"All right, everybody relax, take it easy," the officer said trying to calm the kids down, "We've seen it before. He just needs a little extra charge. There we go." Alan landed in front of this blonde little girl, who looked absolutely petrified of him. Angelica didn't blame her. He had looked as if he had been possessed.

"Some of these big boys, you gotta give them two shots," the officer explained, slapping Alan on the ass, "All right, kids, who want to get their fingerprints done, huh? Come on, let's go." The kids all acted excited and quickly followed the officer, leaving Angelica and his partner to wake the guys up.

"Fuck those guys," Stu complained, "You hear me? That was bullshit. I'm telling everybody we stole a cop car."

"They let us go," Angelica reasoned, "Who cares?"

"I care Ang! How could you let them do that. You're a fucking lawyer. You can't just do that. You can't just tease people because you think it's funny. That's police brutality," Stu yelled. Angelica rolled her eyes. At this point she didn't care it got them out of the precinct. It wouldn't go on their records and they could now go and find Doug. Stu took a deep breath.

"I'm getting a soda. Do you guys want anything," Stu asked. The other three shook their heads. Angelica looked at the ground. She was beginning to get worried about her brother. Phil rubbed his thumb over her knuckles.

"My man doesn't shut up. Jesus Christ," Phil complained, as he pulled Angelica close to him. She leaned her head against his shoulder.

"Alan," she called, "You okay?"

"I'm just worried," he answered, "What if something happened to Doug? Something bad."

"Come on, you can't think like that," Phil said. Angelica's eyes grew wide, when Alan said that. She couldn't bear to think about that. She had no idea how she would explain that to Tracy and her parents.

"I mean, what if he's dead," Alan asked. Angelica twisted her first into Phil's shirt. Phil rubbed her back, trying to calm her down. They only needed one person freaking out right now.

"I can't afford to lose anybody close to me again. It hurts too much. I was so upset when my grandpa died." Angelica's brow furrowed at that comment. She tried to think if Tracy had told her anything about a grandfather dying recently.

"Oh I'm s—How'd he die," Phil asked.

"World War II," Alan explained. Angelica shook her head.

"Died in battle?"

"No, he was skiing in Vermont. It was just during World War II," Alan explained. Angelica took a slow calming breath and turned towards Alan.

"Alan…Doug is fine," she said.

"Well, why hasn't he called?"

"I don't know," she said truthfully, "But we're gonna figure it out." She went to kiss his cheek, but he turned his head and caught her lips with his. She pushed him away from her and stumbled back. Phil got extremely angry and tackled Alan to the ground, punching him twice in the face, before Angelica could pull him off Alan.

"Phil," she screamed, "It was an accident. Will you calm down?"

"No, you're my girl…my wife and no one gets to kiss you, but me," he screamed back at her. Angelica smacked him across the face.

"I am not a possession, Phil Wenneck, I am my own person and until you can see that," she paused taking off the ring she had around her ring finger, "You and I can forget about being married." Phil's jaw went slack again, went Angelica pushed the ring into his opened hand.

"Ang, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it," he said.

"I don't care if you didn't mean it, Phil. It's like you don't trust me and I don't think I can be in a relationship that doesn't trust me," she explained. Tears began to fill her eyes. Phil went to wipe them with his thumb, but she pushed him away from her. It was two steps forward. Three steps back.

"I'll tell you another thing," Stu said, as he came back, completely oblivious to what had just transpired, "6-1 odds our car is beat to shit." Phil looked from Angelica, who had a single tear roll down her cheek to Stu and he stood.

"Stu, not now," Phil interrupted.

"No, how much do you wanna bet it's fucked beyond recognition," Stu said, clearly not hearing Phil.

"That's enough. Ang is seriously worried, okay? Let's not freak her out any more," Phil said. He felt extremely guilty for making her think that he did not trust her, when he trusted her completely.

"I'm sorry, Ang," he said hugging her. She nodded and rested her head against his shoulder, "You know what? We'll search the car for clues and everything's gonna be okay." It was then that they heard the car begin to approach. Angelica whipped the tears from her eyes and closed her eyes. She didn't want to see how badly the car was destroyed.

"Oh shit," Stu said, "I can't watch."

"Just tell me what it looks like," Phil said to Alan.

"Not looking, not looking," Stu chanted. Alan smiled when he saw the car. It was in perfect condition.

"Wow," Stu said in shock, causing Angelica to open her eyes. She smiled when she saw it.

"All right," she said laughing.

"Oh, thank god," Phil whispered. Doug would have killed him if the car was ruined.

"You see," he said to Alan, "It's gonna be all right." He reached over to wrap an arm around Angelica, but she quickly flinched away.

As they drove along, they desperately started searching for clues that could help them find Doug.

"Anything," Phil asked.

"Hmm, I got a cigar," Stu said.

"Oh, I found uh—These are some black shoes," Alan said from the backseat.

"They women's shoes," Phil asked. Alan didn't know, so Angelica took them from him and looked inside.

"Whose are those," Phil aksed.

"I don't know," she replied, "It's a men's size 6."

"That's weird."

"What is this," Alan asked, holding up a used condom, "A snakeskin?"

"Oh, come on," Stu shouted, as it landed on his shoulder, "EW!"

"That's a used condom, Alan," Angelica explained, as Stu threw it into the front seat in between her Phil, only for her to pick it up between her finger nails and throw it back at him.

"Oh, god," said Stu, completely grossed out.

"Get it out of the car," Phil ordered, only for Alan to throw it at him and for it to land on his shoulder.

"Hey, come on," he snapped. "I got jizz on me. Jesus Christ, guys!"

"Hold still, you idiot," Angelica snapped at him. She pinched the condom in between her finger nails again and threw it out of the car.

"All right, what the fuck, man? We gotta get this shit together, guys," Phil shouted. It was then that the foursome heard a sound coming from the trunk.

"What was that," Alan asked.

"It's in the trunk," Stu said, as he listened to the sound again, "Doug's in the trunk!"

"Oh, fuck! Holy shit!" The foursome ran out of the car, and Phil quickly unlocked it. Stu and Phil opened the trunk smiling down expecting to see Doug, when a small naked Asian Man jumped out on top of Phil and began beating him with a crowbar. At seeing what was happening. Angelica quickly dove into the backseat of the car. She wasn't going to risk getting hurt for the three stooges.

After Phil threw him off, the small Asian man, began beating Stu with the same crowbar, knocking him to the ground. He then turned back to Phil, and smacked him the face with crowbar knocking him to the ground. Slowly Alan began to back away from the small man, as he made his advance.

"Whoa, whoa. I'm with you. I'm with you," Alan screamed.

"You gonna fuck on me," the small man asked.

"Nobody's gonna fuck on you," Alan screamed, "we're on your side. I hate Godzilla! I hate him too. I hate him! He destroys cities! Please! This isn't your fault. I'll get you some pants." The small man threw the crowbar at Alan, and ran away. Angelica watched from the car, and then quickly got out to see how the other three were doing.

"What the fuck was that," she asked, as she helped Phil sit against the car.

"I have internal bleeding. Somebody call 911," Stu complained. Angelica just rolled her eyes. He wouldn't have been able to move very well if he had.

"That was some fucked up shit," Phil complained, "Who was that guy? He was so mean." Angelica rolled her eyes, while she looked Phil over. He seemed okay, minus the part where he was acting like a baby, instead of taking the beating he got like a man.

"Guys, there's something I need to tell you," Alan confessed, "Last night on the roof, before we went out…I slipped something in our Jägermeister." Angelica stopped checking Phil over, turned and looked at Alan, her eyes wide.

"What," she snapped.

"I'm sorry," Alan apologized, "I fudged up, guys."

"You drugged us," she asked.

"No, I didn't drug you," Alan said, "I was told it was ecstasy."

"Well, who told you it was ecstasy," she asked, beginning to pace in front of him.

"The guy I bought it from at the liquor store," he explained.

"Why would you give us ecstasy," she asked, trying to remain calm, but her resolve was slowly slipping, and she was beginning to forgive Phil for punching him at the Impound.

"I wanted everybody to have a good time and I knew you guys wouldn't take it," he said, "it was only one hit each, I used to do three hits a night."

"That explains so fucking much," Angelica snapped, "But it wasn't ecstasy, Alan, it was ruphies."

"You think I knew that, Ang? The guy I bought it from seemed like a real straight shooter."

"I'm sorry, you mean the drug dealer at the liquor store wasn't a good guy?"

"Let's calm down," Phil interrupted. He knew what she was like when she was angry and if he didn't stop her now, she would be able to go on forever.

"You fucking calm down! He drugged us. Stu lost a tooth and married a whore, while I married you-"

"How dare you she's a nice lady," Alan interrupted.

"You are such a fucking moron," she said turning to Alan.

"Your language is offensive."

"Fuck you!"

"Alright, Ang, let's just take a deep breath, okay," Phil instructed, grabbing her by the shoulders and dragging her away from Alan.

"Seriously this is a good thing, guys," he explained, "At least it's not some stranger who drugged us for God knows what reason."

"Yeah, your right Phil," Angelica said calmly, "It's totally a good thing. We're so much better off now. Here's something I would like to remind you three of: My brother Doug is probably face down in a ditch right now…with a meth-head butt-fucking his corpse."

"It's high unlikely," Alan interrupted. Angelica lunged at him, ready to throttle him, when Stu and Phil grabbed her from behind stopping her.

"It's true," she shrieked.

"Does not help," Phil whispered in her ear, "All right, let's get our shit together, guys. Let's go back to the hotel, and I'm gonna make a couple calls. Maybe Doug's back there. Maybe he's asleep." He lifted Angelica over his shoulder, her limbs flailing, trying to get him to put her down. After Stu got in the car, he threw her into the front passenger seat.

"Come on," Phil yelled, "Let's go."

The four walked to their villa. Phil was holding Angelica's hand, walking in front of the other pair, so that way she wouldn't try and kill Alan again.

"Wait, guys," Alan paused, "Guys, what about the tiger? What is he got out?"

"Oh fuck. I keep forgetting about the goddamn tiger," Phil groaned, "How the fuck did he get in there?"

"I don't know, because I don't remember," Angelica said sarcastically.

"Shh. Ang. Ang, keep it down," Phil said. She looked at him and nodded.

"Because one of the, uh, side effects of, uh, ruphies is memory loss," Alan explained to her. Her eyes grew wide and almost attacked him again. She honestly couldn't remember hating a person more, than she did now.

"You are literally too stupid to insult," Stu muttered, pushing Angelica toward the door. Alan thanked him. Phil looked at the three of them.

"Hey," he whispered, as he quietly and quickly opened the door. The foursome walked in one by one.

"Did we leave the music on," Phil asked, turning to Angelica. Alan slammed the door behind him, causing the three of them to flinch.

"Hey," Phil said, "Shh."

"Don't make any sudden movements," Angelica explained. Phil looked around, before he literally walked into a man that was built like a wall.

"Who the hell are you," Angelica shrieked, while Phil did some make-shift karate movements.

"No, who are you," asked the walking-talking wall. It was then that the foursome noticed the man that was sitting on the piano.

"Quiet, quiet," he said, throwing his hands up.

"Mike Tyson," Phil asked, as he wrapped an arm around Angelica, who didn't flinch away from it this time.

"Shh," Tyson quieted, "This is my favourite part coming up right now." He drummed his hands along with the music. Phil lead the Angelica over to Mike Tyson.

"I can feel it coming in the air tonight," Tyson paused, "I need a chorus line, guys." Alan then began to sing along with music. The guys smiled, but Angelica got that same feeling she got in the precinct. This wasn't going to be good.

"But, I've been waiting for this moment for all my life," Tyson continued, "One more time guys." It was then that the entire group joined in, only Phil, Stu and Alan smiling though. Tyson then punch Alan, knocking him out. Angelica's eyes grew wide, while Phil and Stu fell to the ground beside him, to check it out.

"Why did you do that," Phil asked. The walking-talking wall, then paused the music.

"Mr. Tyson would like to know why his tiger is in your bathroom."

"Hold on, that was complete unnecessary," Phil said, throwing his hands up. Angelica looked from him, to Mike Tyson and his friend, to Alan on the floor. She blinked twice, before taking a quick seat in her mind it was completely necessary. After all he did ruphie them, which caused her to forget her own wedding to Phil.

"I'm a huge fan," Phil continued, "When you knocked out Holmes, that was—"

"Explain," said the associate. Angelica then stood up. It was better if she said something, because then that way they wouldn't have two unconscious bodies on the hotel villa floor.

"All right, look, we were drugged last night. We have no memory of what happened," she explained.

"It's true," Stu said, "We got in all kinds of trouble last night and now we can't find our friend, her brother, and if you wanna kill us, go ahead because I don't care anymore." Phil and Angelica looked at him. Angelica put her head in her hands and groaned, all three of them are idiots and when they find Doug, he's an idiot too, for just being friends with them, that was how frustrated she was.

"What are you talking about," Phil asked Stu.

"What? I don't care," Stu explained.

"Why the fuck would you wanna steal his tiger," asked the wall.

"They tend to do some dumb shit when we're fucked up and usually drag me along for the ride," Angelica explained.

"I don't believe these guys, man," Tyson mumbled.

"Wait, how did you guys find us," she asked.

"One of you dropped your jacket. Found it in the tigers' cage this morning," answered the wall.

"That's Doug's," she said happily.

"Yeah, Doug," the associate said, throwing the jacket at her, "His wallet and his room key is in there."

"No, that's my missing brother," she explained.

"I don't give a fuck," he said.

"Did you guys see him," Stu asked.

"I was fast asleep," Tyson said.

"Yeah, because if he was up, this wouldn't have gone down so smoothly," explained the wall.

"Maybe one of the tigers ate his ass like Omar," Tyson said, smiling slightly.

"Respect," the wall said, taking his hat off.

"Wha—what happened to Omar," Angelica asked, leaning into Phil, slightly afraid.

"Oh, don't worry about Omar, he's not with us no more," Tyson explained, causing Angelica's eyes to widen even more. She lost the feeling in her legs and Phil had to hold her up.

"Okay, I know this is asking a lot," Phil stated, "But do you think that there is anyway we could go to your house and just look around…see if there's any clues for our friend?"

"Absolutely. How else you think we're gonna get the tiger back anyway? Come on champ." Mike Tyson and the wall soon began to leave the room.

"I'm sorry," Phil asked, unsure of what he heard.

"We're not gonna put it in the Bentley. You brought it here, you bring it back. What you think, bout 40 minutes?"

"Don't make me come back for him," Tyson said threateningly. Angelica nodded and quickly took a seat in one of the chairs and put her head between her knees. She need blood to go to her head, before she fainted.

"That was Mike Tyson," Stu whispered.

"Yeah, no shit, that was Mike Tyson," Phil answered.

"I'm just saying, he's still got it." Alan began to regain consciousness, causing the guys to run over and check him over.

The foursome order a raw steak, to jam a few ruphies in. That was the only way they could possible think of getting the tiger out of the hotel, into the car and back to Mike Tyson's calmly. Angelica wasn't feeling that well, since the subject of Doug possibly being eaten by a Tiger came up, so they left her out, and since Alan had taken a punch from Tyson it came down to game of rock, paper, scissors between Phil and Stu to see who would have to go into the bathroom to feed the tiger the drugged steak. Stu lost.

"This does not seem fair," Stu complained. Angelica who was sitting on Phil's lap again, rested her head on his shoulder, just sighed heavily. She was sick of the complaining.

"It's Rock, Paper, Scissors," Phil said, "There's nothing more fair."

"Alan should do it," Stu tried.

"Alan took a punch from Mike Tyson and I don't think Doug would like it, if we sent his sister to feed the tiger," Phil shot down quickly, "Come on. For Doug."

"Why are you peppering the steak," Stu asked, as he watched Alan, "You don't know if tigers like pepper."

"Tigers love pepper," Alan said seriously, "They hate cinnamon."

"Phil just do it," Stu tried again, "You should do it." Angelica grabbed Phil's shirt, she wasn't going to let him anywhere near that tiger. He was her lifeline right now.

Phil seeing the way that Angelica was clutching his shirt, said "I would, but you lost. It wouldn't be right."

"Okay, I jammed five ruphies in there," explained Alan, "Just go in there and throw it in to him." Stu grabbed the steak. Angelica offered him a small smile, while she breathed in the scent of Phil's cologne.

"Fine," he relented.

"Make sure he eats the whole thing," Phil offered. Stu slowly walked over to the bathroom and into it. He stood against the wall,.

"Fuck…oh fuck," he swore, as he looked around the corner. He took a slow step around the corner and held out the drugged steak in offering.

"Hey kitty. Hey, sweetie, it's okay. I got a little snack for you. Real important that you eat this, okay? Yeah, just have a little—"The tiger growled at Stu and knocked the steak out of his, causing Stu to shriek like an eight year old girl for the third time that day and run from the bathroom as quick as his feet could carry him.

"Shit," Stu panted. Angelica, Alan and Phil were standing as they waited to see what happens.

"What do we do now," Stu asked.

"We wait," Alan stated.

Stu began to play the piano, as they waited for the tiger to finish the steak. Angelica was dozing slightly on Phil's lap, while he read a magazine. The cheap dice ring was back on her finger with the promise to replace it with something less cheap when they got back to Pasadena.

"What do tiger dream of when they take a little tiger snooze? Do they dream of mauling zebras or Halle Berry in her cat woman suit? Don't you worry your pretty striped head, we're gonna you back to Tyson and your cozy tiger bed and then we're gonna find our best friend Doug and then we're gonna give him a best friend hug. Doug, Doug, Doug, Doug, Dougie, Dougie, Doug, Doug, but if he's been murdered by crystal-meth tweakers…well then we're shit out of luck," Stu sang. Not long after they heard a growl and thud come from the bathroom signalling that the tiger had finally fell unconscious. Phil shook Angelica up. She smiled at him sleepily.

"How'd you sleep," he asked.

"Didn't sleep…dozed," she explained, "The tiger out yet?"

"Yeah, just now. You sure you want to come with us," he asked. She nodded. She needed to know if Doug was alive or dead and if the tiger's ate, she was slaughtering them all. Phil helped her to her feet, and then helped Stu and Alan, load the tiger onto a luggage cart and roll it down the hall.

"By the way, we're all gonna die," Stu said, as he rolled the cart down the hallway. Angelica glared at him. It was then that Alan smacked the tiger's nose into the wall.

"Oh, god," Phil said.

"His nose, that's his nose," Stu whispered frantically.

The four of them sat in the front seat, while the Tiger was laid in the back. The drive to Tyson's was extremely quiet. Angelica didn't want to talk to Alan and the guys were just hoping to get to Tyson's alive and while the tiger was still unconscious.

"Hey, guys, when's the next Halley's comet," Alan asked. Angelica glared at him and ignored him, while she drove the Mercedes, sitting on Phil's lap, while he did the gas and brake pedals for her.

"Who cares man," Phil asked.

"Do you know, Stu," Alan asked.

"I don't think it's for like another 60 years or something," Stu answered.

"But it's not tonight, right?"

"No, I don't think so," Stu answered.

"But you don't know for sure," Alan asked.

"No."

"I got this cousin Marcus who saw one. He said it blew his mind," Alan explained, "I wanna make sure I never, ever miss out on a Halley's Comet." It was then that something caught Angelica's hear. It was the tiger and it was waking up.

"So if you guys know, if there's gonna be one—"

"Oh, fuck," she swore. The foursome continued to shout, scream and panic. The tiger then clawed at Phil's shoulder, causing Angelica to swerve the car and knock it into a passing bus and then into the wall of the tunnel they were in. The four of them scrambled out of the car, while the tiger continued to tear at the leather upholstery and smash the glass.

"Ang! Ang, it got me! Ang," Phil panicked.

"You got clawed," she screamed, "You're bleeding."

They decided to push the car the rest of the way to Tyson's house. Stu, Angelica and Phil were pushing it from behind, while Alan steered the car from the outside. The tiger sat calmly in the backseat as it watched the three push the car. The tiger growled and went inside the car to watch them from the back window.

"I can't do it," Alan panicked.

"Get your fucking hand back in there and steer the car," Angelica snapped. She had enough of Alan's antics and if Doug was dead, she was going to kill him and then sick Tracy on him.

"I'm too nervous," Alan exclaimed.

"Alan. We need you, buddy. This is your time to shine, okay," Stu said calmly, as they pushed it up Tyson's driveway.

"Okay, yeah. Whew," Alan said, before he went back to steering the car, "Daddy's gonna kill me."

"That's it, that's good," Phil said, as he continued to push the car alongside Angelica and Stu, "Keep it straight.

The walking talking wall, opened to door.

"You're late."

"Whatever, man. We had to push it the last mile," Angelica said irritably. She had just found a broken nail and while that was the least of her worries right now, it just added to what she was already feeling.

"Come on in," he said, "Mike's got something he wants to show you." The foursome stepped into the lavish house, leaving the tiger in the Mercedes.

"That thing's out of control, man," Phil said, "Seriously you gotta put it down."

"When we got back, we took a look at the security cameras," Tyson explained.

"Great," Angelica said. The walking talking wall pressed play. On the TV they saw the five of them walking along Tyson's front lawn laughing and making fun of the way each other walked.

"Oh it's Doug," Stu breathed out.

"Oh, thank God, he's alive," Angelica gasped, grabbing Phil's hand with her own.

"That's our buddy," Alan explained.

"That's who we've been missing," Stu furthered.

"We're all best friends," Alan said, causing Angelica to give him a look. She clearly did not think of him as one of her best friends.

"Why don't you just pay attention," Tyson snapped, "I don't have all night."

"Yeah, of course. Of course."

"They watched as they walked around the pool and Alan climbed up on some of the rocks that had surrounded it.

"That's me," Alan laughed, "I'm on TV. I've never been on TV before." They watched as Alan then proceeded to pee in the pool.

"Really? Really Alan," Phil asked. He rubbed his thumb against Angelica's knuckles.

"Yeah, I was uh," Alan started, "Maybe—Should I wait outside?"

"I think that's a good idea, Alan," Tyson said and Alan quickly left.

"Don't touch anything out there, either," said the human wall. Angelica kept watching the TV.

"You know what? He's not our good fr—We don't know him that well," Stu explained. They continued to watch as the fivesome lead the tiger down the driveway and into the cop car, all laughing and joking around.

"By the way man, where you get that cop car from," Tyson asked.

"We ,uh, stole it from these dumb ass cops," Stu answered. Tyson smiled.

"Nice." The other three began to laugh.

"High five that one," Tyson said, raising his hand to Stu and then to Angelica and Phil.

"You know, I just have to say…I have never seen a more beautiful, elegant, just regal creature," Phil said, before Angelica smacked him and pointed to the video. He then proceeded to watch his drunk and drugged self pretend to shag the tiger from behind, and then much to Angelica's dismay, her drunk and drugged self then forced a kiss on Phil, and proceeded to let him screw her against the front hood of the car. She took her hand away from Phil, and buried her hand in both hands, desperately trying to hide the blush that had spread across her face.

"Who does shit like that, man," Tyson asked.

"Someone who had a lot of issues, obviously," Phil explained, "I'm a sick man."

"That's all we got," explained the human wall.

"This was hugely helpful. Really. Because now we know that our buddy Doug was with us at 3:30, totally alive."

Phil quickly thanked them and then apologized about stealing the tiger. Angelica was too embarrassed to speak and decided that it would be better if she said nothing at all.

"Don't worry about it, man," Tyson answered, "Like your girl said, we all do dumb shit when we're fucked up." The two guys laughed and the four quickly left afterwards.

Stu quickly drove them back to the hotel.

"You know, everyone say Mike Tyson is such a badass…but I think he's kind of a sweetheart," he said, as he drove them through the streets of Las Vegas.

"I think he's mean," Alan said.

"All right. I think it's officially time we call Tracy," Phil said, breaking his silence.

"Hallelujah," Angelica said, "Finally, Phil says something that makes sense."

"I mean we don't have much of a choice. And maybe she's heard from Doug," Phil furthered.

"That's what I have been saying this whole time," Angelica continued. Stu stopped at red light.

"We just need to be completely honest. We need to tell her everything," Phil said.

"We don't have to tell her everything," Stu paused, "We can leave out the stuff about me marrying a hooker and you and Ang getting married when you were drunk. Just stay focused on Doug."

"What am I gonna tell my dad about this car," Alan asked.

"Alan, relax. It's just the inside. Come on. I got a guy in LA who's great with interiors-"It was then that a giant black SUV slammed into the Mercedes, and causing the foursome to scream. The SUV drove them right into a pole, causing Angelica to hit her head against the window and black out.

A/N: I hope everyone has a happy New Year. For those of you who live in a part of the world where it is already 2012, I hope you partied hard and for those of us who have yet to reach midnight. Let's party harder!

xo