SHIT!

Shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit shit.

I could feel my whole body trembling and my hands were shaking.

Shit.

Somehow, swearing like this was not helping. But SHIT!

How could this happen? How the HELL could this happen?

Knock knock knock

I jumped and dropped the damn thing on the floor.

"What?"

"Sookie! What are you doing in there? I need to use the first aid kit. Fucking Oberon! I cut myself again."

"Just a sec."

"Damn, blood tastes like bad fish when you're human!"

It had been about a month since Pam found out that Oberon was Eric. She'd been coming by almost every night to discuss plans and strategy of an assault on the Nevada vamps with the handful of vampires they knew they could trust. Eric and Pam were even considering forming an alliance with the weres since Felipe's regime had been taxing the Louisiana weres pretty hard. Felipe knew that after two wars, the Long Tooth pack was weak in numbers and couldn't do a thing about a vampire king who was extorting them.

They'd been going on about how and when to tackle this and, as much as I wanted to stay in the loop of all things concerning Eric, I had been unable to stay awake through the night with them. I'd been quite lethargic recently and now I knew why.

I scrambled to throw everything away and flush the toilet like I'd been using it, and opened the door for Eric.

"You alright Lover? You look a little pale."

"Just might be coming down with something, tail end of the summer flu maybe. Nothing to worry about."

"Maybe we should call for Ludwig."

"Why would I need Dr. Ludwig for the flu? I can see a human doctor for that. We don't need to waste money like that." Couldn't have Ludwig finding out. She knew everybody!

"Don't let it drag on for too long okay?" He gave me a quick peck on my forehead and went over to the sink to wash his wound. Apart from working out like a son of a bitch, Eric had taken up to carving stakes and melting silver weapons for the impending war against Felipe during his spare time. He was turning out to be quite the craftsman. He'd been carving some of them into decorative items such as elongated Christmas trees with silver stars at the top, and silver filled pencils, and scattering them all over the house. Eric had been experimenting with different designs and sometimes when they got tricky, accidents were bound to happen, like him cutting his thumb just now. While he was busy at the sink I took the opportunity to retreat to the living room.

I pulled out the little stick from my jean pocket and just stared. How could this happen? I was on the pill. Okay. When did I start taking these? My last period finished around the time I found out Eric was back and he was still in the hospital. We came home and there was only that one time that was kind of like a spur of a moment thing when we did it without protection. I was already on the pill for three weeks and was about to start on the sugar pills! I know the advice was to wait for the first month but c'mon! It was just that once when I caught him looking at himself in the bathroom! Just once! Give me a break this can't be happening!

I let out a quiet sob. I was trying to control the tears welling up in my eyes because I couldn't let Eric see me cry or he'd find out. I didn't even know how I felt about it myself, let alone how to tell him. Our conversations had never breached the topic of having a family, not yet. I didn't even know how he felt about kids. He liked Hunter and talked to him when he was around but I wouldn't say that he was overly enthused about him. Eric didn't talk about Hunter on the days he wasn't here and never made any references to having any of our own since he was human now. I'd somehow assumed that seeing Hunter brought up a sore spot about his own children and how he had to leave them when he was turned. He was also still getting accustomed to being human. Then there was the war against Nevada. Talk about bad timing to get pregnant, when you and your husband might not even see Christmas.

"Sookie! What's wrong with you? If you're that sick you should lie down. You're making me uneasy."

Shit! I stuffed the stick back into my pocket and wiped my eyes.

Eric came and kneeled beside me by the lounger and took my hands into his. "I know you're distressed Lover, you haven't been through anything like this before, please know that Pam and I will be by your side and we won't let anything happen to you. There's no point of you keeping it bottled up inside."

What? How did he know? "Eric I – "

"There's no need for you to put on a brave face, I know the war is upsetting you. I don't mean to scare you with all the stakes I've been putting around the house and all those late night talks with Pam. Understand that the more detailed and meticulous we are about this, the less chance we have of having a full on confrontation. If we manage to weaken them just enough and be able to launch an attack with the element of surprise the whole situation could be solved swiftly. There might not even be a need for the stakes. I just like to be prepared."

And… there was that. I couldn't say I was all that comfortable with forming a coup against Felipe, but I wasn't a hot house flower either. I thought Eric should know me better. If I didn't have anything to hide I would've told him so. But for now all I could say was, "I hope you're right." Damn weak if you ask me.

The doorbell rang and I got up to answer it.

"Ah the child is here, that's good. He always manages to lift your spirits." Eric said.

As I opened the door Hunter was already standing on the porch.

"Goodbye Daddeeeeeeeeee." Hunter said as he waved goodbye to his dad. Remy waved back from his truck. Remy had begun the annoying habit of not getting out of his truck when he dropped Hunter for his weekend stay. He'd also taken liberties like picking up Hunter later on Saturdays, sometimes even staying on Sundays when he could take another shift. Humph. But what could I say? The man just wanted to make a living for his boy and himself. He's lucky I adore Hunter.

"Can I have a snack Aunt Sookie?"

"Sure."

Hunter ran past me into the kitchen and got the cereal out. He already knew his way around the house and he was comfortable with his surroundings.

"Don't spoil your appetite." I said as I watched the mound of flakes pile on his bowl.

"Do you have nanas?" Hunter said as he looked up at me with those big round innocent baby eyes.

Why are you so hungry Hunter? I asked him silently. Hunter's mind went straight to being at school with no lunch because there wasn't always food at home. He caught my thought and concentrated very hard on just thinking about getting the milk from the fridge.

I felt a pang in my heart from what I just saw in his mind. I didn't know things were so hard for Hunter and Remy. I would talk with Remy when he picked Hunter up, if he needed help to stay afloat I'd be more than happy to help.

A few hours later while I was still mulling over my problem and half heartedly starting on dinner, Eric was on the computer balancing our finances and Hunter was drawing with his crayons on the dining table. When I glanced over at him to make sure he was okay, what Hunter was drawing struck me like a bolt of lightening.

"Hunter what are you drawing there buddy?"

"A doggy."

"What's his name?"

"It's a her and she's Gran. She asked me to call her Gran."

A very dry lump lodges in my throat. "When did she tell you this honey?"

"When we were looking for you."

"When were you looking for me Hunter?"

Hunter went back to drawing and clammed up. Something was scaring him. "It's ok Hunter" I said as I reached to give him hug.

We were in a castle, cold stone walls surrounded us or rather Hunter. He was being led on a leash by dog; a beautiful golden retriever. He liked the dog, it made him feel safe. He didn't like where they were or where they were going though.

When he was three, Kristen thought that Hunter would like to watch Harry Potter and rented the DVD. He loved the magic and the flying broomsticks, but there were some parts that had scared him.

Just like in the movie, we went up the interchangeable stairs and reached a door, Hunter was trembling. The dog kept sniffing and scratching the door and Hunter knew what that meant. If he didn't let the dog out, then it would have an accident inside and nobody likes that. With trembling fingers, Hunter unlatched the door and the room we entered was just like in the movie. Fluffy, the three headed dog was lying there sleeping. I laughed at how funny a child's mind worked. One of Fluffy's heads had a red rose tucked behind its ear, another one of its heads had the tattoo of three arrows on his forehead and the one furthest away from us had a chalice around its neck and it was drooling into it as it slept. However, instead of guarding the trap door, sitting beside it was a girl in a pink dress. Hunter wanted to turn around but the golden retriever tugged him towards the girl. As Hunter drew closer I realized that the girl was actually…

"Aunt Sookie?"

"Hunter? Sweetheart? What are you doing here? Where is your father?"

"Aunt Sookie we have to go!"

"This is Eric honey, he's my fiancé and he won't hurt you. You don't have to be afraid."

"Aunt Sookie! We have to go NOW! You shouldn't be here. Please go back with me."

The girl, well, the me in Hunter's dream, got up and started to follow him out. Hunter was nearly running now as one of the heads started to wake up. He saw that the other two had blood dripping from their snoring lips and had the instinct to know that they were fed and sated, while the one which was waking up was drooling and looked hungry. The golden retriever put itself between Fluffy and Hunter while the me in the dream was approaching them at a slow jog. The golden retriever turned around with the saddest puppy eyes and wagged its tale. It looked almost apologetic.

I snapped myself out of little Hunter's head to find his face wet with tears. I scooped his trembling little body in my arms and started to rock and kissing him on the forehead. I had no idea that this brave little child went through so much for me. Though I could only remember snippets of my own dreams before I woke up, somehow the ambiance of what Hunter and I experienced felt the same. Impossible as that may seem, my mind boggled at what this all could mean.

"I'm sorry I made you remember that awful nightmare Hunter, but it's only a dream. It can't hurt you. You understand that right?"

Hunter nodded with while he sniffled the last of his tears. "Was it real Aunt Sookie?"

"Of course it wasn't real Hunter, so there's nothing you have to be afraid of. I won't let anything bad happen to you. Ever. Okay?" I could feel Hunter start to relax so I put him down in front of the TV and got him some hot milk and two cookies. I knew it would spoil his appetite but this was an emergency.

As I was trying to start dinner with even more on my mind, the phone rang.

"Sookie! You home? It's JB! Tara's at the hospital and she's hollerin' for you. Can you get here?"

Absolutely panic stricken, the only thing that struck my mind was, "Is she alright?"

"As alright as a woman in labor can be I s'pose."

"Oh JB!"

"Yes! Can you get here or not?"

I looked at Hunter all settled and finally gotten his mind off things, would a trip to the hospital to see a baby be that bad? Babies. I just had the best idea.

"How far along is she?"

"She's nearly ten centimeters they're going to push her in soon. Hurry."

"Okay JB. You're going to be a daddy soon!"

"Right."

Nothing like a nervous father to make me feel normal.

I padded back into the living room to Hunter to find Eric reading the paper on the sofa next to him. Perfect.

"Hey Hunter! How would you like to visit a new baby!"

Hunter looked up at me with those large brown eyes and said, "Do I get to see the stork?"

"Maybe not the stork this time honey, but we'll get to see the baby for sure."

"Okay!" Hunter said excitedly and ran to put his shoes on.

"Hey Eric, do you think you can come with? Just in case Tara needs my help and Hunter gets to be a handful."

"I'm already getting the keys."

I was going to find out what the mighty Eric Northman thought about children once and for all.