A/N: Thank you thank you thank you for all of your reviews/favorites/subscriptions. God, you make me feel happy enough to shit rainbows. :D

So, this is the last chapter that I have written so far. Hopefully this won't actually be a bad thing.

Also: HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AMERICA!

Entry 26

So, Titanic is officially the worst movie to watch on a boat ever.

Ever.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go patch up any holes I find with duct tape.

Entry 27

I wonder how I would look with Leonardo DiCaprio's haircut...

Entry 28

Okay, so I just realized that these last few entries have been exceedingly LAME. Oh, the burden of being the ultimate master of a bunch of mindless drones. It sucks up all your time.

All right. Something awesome.

Um.

I beat my high score on Tetris.

Um...

... I'M SORRY THAT THERE'S NOTHING INTERESTING GOING DOWN ON THIS LAME-ASS BOAT.

Oh, found a quarter in one of the Rare Hunters' pockets today.

Finders keepers~

Entry 29

You know, it's kind of weird. I suddenly have this unexplainable urge to go on a killing spree and eat too much mayonnaise.

I don't even like mayonnaise.

Entry 30

I am feeling very disoriented lately. I keep waking up in places that I definitely did not go to sleep in. Like the broom closet. Or Rare Hunter No. 8's room.

Urgh.

Entry 31

Fuuuck my head hurts.

I feel like I'm going to

Entry 32

KILL THEM ALL KILL THEM ALL KILL THEM ALL KILL THEM ALL KILL THEM ALL KILL THEM ALL

Entry 33

Um. I definitely don't remember writing that last entry.

Someone needs to tell me what the fuck is going on before I get reeeaaally pissed.

I CAN TELL YOU.

HolyfuckingmotherofRa what was that!

Entry 34

Okay. Okay. Breathe. This is weird. Too fucking weird, even for my standards. Okay. Okay. Um.

So.

Apparently, the reason I have been waking up in random places/wanting to murder more people than usual/eating too much mayonnaise is that there is a slightly deranged voice in my head who swears that his sole desire is to help me in my quest to defeat the Pharaoh and take control of the world.

I think I can live with that.

Still doesn't explain the mayonnaise.

I LIKE MAYONNAISE.

Whoah! Okay, no! Not cool! If this is going to work out between us, we need to set some boundaries here. Like, no taking control of my body to go on a killing spree or make sandwiches without permission. Are we clear?

YES. FINE. DO I GET TV PRIVILEGES?

No.

DAMN.

I have recently realized that I lead a very fucked-up existence. Maybe I should get therapy.

YEAH, PROBABLY.

Entry 35

Sharing a mind is not a picnic. It's very... crowded.

I really should have cleaned up in here.

Entry 36

I wonder if I should tell Odion about the voice in my head. I mean, I'm not really an expert on these things, but isn't that something you tell your family?

"Hello, Odion. I'd like you to meet my new roommate. He's going to help me murder someone. What? No, you can't see him. Why? Because he lives in my head!"

Maybe not.

Entry 37

I've decided against telling Odion about my new roomie. I think that it would cause unnecessary tension, and no one wants that.

Besides, I'm mad at him. He ate my Cheez-Its.

Now that I think about it, Cheez-Its really are deceptive little buggers. I mean, "real cheese" my ass. Cheese is not and has never been orange and powdery. That's false advertising right there.

And every time I write cheese now, I always want to spell it with a Z.

... That's it, I'm converting to Doritos. At least they aren't trying to be something they're not.

IS THIS COMING FROM THE DEEP-SEATED LACK OF SELF-WORTH THAT YOUR DAD INSTILLED IN YOU? BECAUSE THERE'S THERAPY FOR THAT. YOU COULD GO ON A KILLING SPREE. THAT ALWAYS MAKES ME FEEL BETTER. YOU DON'T HAVE TO TURN TO FOOD.

Oh, shut up, you.