Summary: He left again. It didn't make a difference that he had convinced the Hokage to make it official mission. The fact is he left. And he didn't even have the guts to say good bye face to face. Who needs a stupid letter?

Warnings: Yaoi Lemons MPreg Angst Swearing

Rating: Mature

Disclaimer: I do not own the rights, nor do I wish to own the rights to Naruto or its characters

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Letters

Chapter Six

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"You ready? We won't be coming back for a long time."

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Those words resonated in his head for hours. He wasn't ready, not at all. But it was too late. There was no time left. They had already begun their week long trek to an old Uchiha Estate. Both Kiba and Baa-Chan had tried to discourage him from choosing this place as his safe house, but he would have none of it. They had argued that anyone who knew of his relationship with the Uchiha would see this coming, only to have Naruto argue right back that no one knew of their relationship and that even if they did, wouldn't it be too much of an obvious place? They would never think the Hokage of Konoha unintelligent enough to allow one of her elite jounin to what they thought of as an unprotected place. He had won the battle, mostly because he had threatened to leave on his own, rather than his brilliant debate skills.

With the campsite for the night chosen, and the fire lit, food was the next necessary item on the agenda. Being that he was pregnant, he thought it fair that Kiba do the foraging, and if he was in a giving mood, he may just tend to the fire during the night. Who knew being pregnant could be so enjoyable? Sniggering to himself slightly, he entered his perfectly made tent – courtesy of Kiba. Oh yes, there certainly were perks. He found it strange that he was learning to smile again after such a small period of time. In the beginning he had thought it would take him weeks, if not months. In worst case scenarios he thought it may have even taken till their child was born before his muscles worked up the courage to try something quite as daring as a smile. As much as he was loathe to admit it, Kiba had helped in more ways then one. He had forced him to put his priorities in the correct order, and to be happy again.

Forcing him to be happy? What a strange way to put it, but yet in the situation it made perfect sense. Because he had been forced. Forced by the silly antics of someone who was rapidly becoming one of his closest friends. If only he could do so much in return. To think that for over a year his friend had been battling with a pain no one saw. All had thought that because the relationship had ended before His love went missing in action, that Kiba would not be affected too seriously. How wrong were they. If anything, it made the pain worse for Kiba. For him to go through the guilt of being angry and resentful towards His former love in what could possibly have been his last moments, Naruto hoped he never knew such a feeling.

With all these feelings of guilt, Kiba never even had a chance to move on properly. He wasn't allowed to stay angry because the person he was angry at could possibly be dead. This meant that he could not move on from the relationship at his own pace. It meant that that chapter of his life was, as it was seeming to be so far, to be forever unfinished. A novel without an ending. It was so unfair. And because of all this, Kiba's heart never once moved on. It was almost like he was still waiting for his love to return. And there was nothing Naruto could do about it. There was no way for him to comfort Kiba without re-opening old wounds.

It just wasn't fair.

With all these thoughts, some almost boarding on pity, he briefly thought that maybe, just maybe he should help Kiba to finish the dinner. Seeing his friend sopping wet, face red from frustration, yelling and swearing at the "stupid fish", Naruto decided that letting him do it on his own was better. His friend had been searching for so long for something to occupy his mind that it wasn't Naruto's place to take it away from him. Kiba was right in saying that he and Naruto were the same. Pity was not something that either wanted. And anyway, if Naruto were to be completely honest, he didn't mind not doing chores. Coughing on an almost escaped gig-laugh, he decided that dinner was a ways off yet, and maybe a nap was needed to get him through until then. It was amazing just how lazy he had become.

"Baby's fault..." he whispered groggily to himself, causing a small smile to flit across his self appointed protector's face.

See, Kiba thought to himself, loneliness isn't so great. Sometimes it's just nice to know that someone else is there with you...

-.-

There had been no mishaps along the road, as long as the angry mother bear could be discluded. How was Naruto to know that the cub was not in fact lost, but just waiting on the other side of a bush for it's mother to finish finding food. The moment Naruto saw the cub, looking so lost and alone, he couldn't help but try and pick it up to comfort. Blame it on the newly growing maternal instincts. After being chased for a good mile, they were safe to move on at their previous pace.

Now an hour off from their destination, both could almost smell the comfortable beds that awaited them. If such a thing were even possible.

Reaching up to adjust his bag, Naruto saw the abandoned Uchiha estate coming into view. He had been expecting to see a run down mansion, but he was sorely mistaken. Though the garden seemed to have grown a bit out of hand, the house itself seemed perfectly fine. The paint was neither peeling nor off colour. It seemed as if it had never been left.

He excitedly jogged the remaining few metres to the house, almost holding his breathe in anticipation as he opened the gate. It was perfect. Old style roof, the large wooden doors, and the purest of white paper walls.

On the inside, furniture was sparse. No portraits of people adorned the walls, only a few landscapes to keep them from being lonely. Dust had accumulated every where, so thick that their footsteps left prints. Opposite to the front entry, the back garden was still in immaculate condition. No algae marred the simple ponds and water features, weeds seeming to fear the thought of blemishing such perfection. Trees trimmed to the most complimenting heights, as if they had been waiting all this time for someone to come along and appreciate their worth. And the flowers. Their scent seemed to play with your nose, tickling your senses while warring with ones eyes, almost daring them to try and find another as beautiful as them.

Letting out a whimpered sigh, Naruto dropped his bags to the ground and freely allowed his mouth to hang open. He had no idea why Sasuke had never brought him here before. Heck, he had no idea why Sasuke did not insist they live here permanently. He could think of no better place to raise children...

But that was the problem wasn't it.

Sasuke didn't know that they were about to become parents. He had thought from the very beginning that being with Naruto had meant that he had given up his chance to revive his clan. And yet he had still chosen him. He had picked Naruto over one of his life dreams. And Naruto had let him. Back then he had not known it was possible for him to conceive, and he still chose to selfishly keep Sasuke to himself. If he had really cared, he would have told Sasuke from the first moment they became a couple that they should leave together to find Itachi. They could have fought together.

But no.

He was too selfish once again. It was dangerous, and he had just been so comfortable at the time. He finally had the love of his life right there beside him. Was it really so bad that he wanted to keep it that way for just a little bit longer? Yes. Yes it was. It was because, if he had just left then, if he had not been so selfish; then this could all have been over by now. Sasuke wouldn't be fighting alone, and Naruto wouldn't be here feeling sorry for himself like the sap he was. But he couldn't help it. He had just been so happy.

Falling to his knees, Naruto finally let his tears fall freely. And over one of the most irrelevant things he could possibly be thinking of at a time like this. Why was it that he was so stupid? He was safe now. He had someone to rely on. He was no longer alone, so why was he crying? Why was he letting the past come back to haunt him. The past was something he couldn't change, so why let it get to him? If he wanted to cry, why wasn't he crying over the fact that Sasuke had left him? It didn't make any sense.

And yet the tears just kept falling.

Like rain is the simplest form of water, his tears were the very essence of sadness. Hopelessness and desperation.

It didn't matter what the fiend logic had to say. He was alone. So what if he had Kiba to lean on. So what if he had a baby growing within him. His heart was locked in a windowless room, screaming for Sasuke to come back. To not leave him. Not again.

And maybe that is why he cried. God knows he would give anything to have an excuse for these tears.

Feeling strong arms come up behind him and wrap his body in a comforting embrace, he felt his body start to relax, releasing all the tension from his shoulders.

"I was wandering when you were finally going to break. I'm just glad that I'm here to pick up the pieces now that it has happened. I know you were always afraid that he was going to disappear again. I know that you're afraid that everyone else will leave you too, so I'm going to tell you something; I. Will. Never. Leave. You... Never. Do you understand that Naruto? I'm here from now till the very end. So get ready for a very annoying life with me being the primary annoyer." Grinning down cheekily, Kiba softly wiped away the tears staining Naruto's face.

Gently picking Naruto up, he trekked quietly through the house before finding a bedroom to place Naruto in. He watched as Naruto sleepily called out for Sasuke, his heart breaking for his friend at each whimpered plead. If it wasn't for the fact he knew the bastard loved Naruto, and had left for both of their sakes, he would tear the Uchiha's body apart limb by limb. People don't just leave their mate without a proper goodbye. Not if they love each other.

"Love? Hah, love only brings a world of hurt. Friends are all we really need." He whispered bitterly to himself.

-.-

Naruto groggily opened his eyes. He had no recollection of how he came to be in this bed, nor when he had even fallen asleep. Turning over to curl up once again, he groaned at the pain in his head. That was another reason he hated to cry. Not only did it hurt emotionally, but it drained him physically.

Hearing a rustle of paper, he groped around the pillows to remove the object intruding on his sleep. His fingers brushed along thick parchment. His eyes shot open as he sat up quickly, hands now scrabbling for the paper. Grasping it in shaking hands he slowly opened the letter. Looking down to calm himself, he noticed a large pile of unopened letters. Counting them he realized that there were 11. One for everyone that had not arrived while he was in Konoha, one for everyday they had been on the road, and one... for today.

Reading through each one, he laughed and smiled and frowned and felt so many emotions that he didn't know what to do with himself. It was just too much. Not once over all these days had Sasuke forgotten him. He had been diligently recording down his thoughts. Telling Naruto what news he had come across, what his next steps were most likely to be. All the kind of things that helped Naruto know that Sasuke was being careful, that he wasn't letting his need for revenge make him do something rash. He had known better than Naruto himself, just what he needed to hear.

Moving onto the last letter, Naurto wandered briefly if he should have taken his time with the letters, rather than race through them life a child at Christmas time. He decided that that would have just been worse for him, his impatience being something he acknowledged quite readily. Putting his obsessive thoughts to the farthest corners of his mind he began reading the last letter he had so far.

-.-

I met the widowed wife of a shinobi who used to be well acquainted with my family. She was the oddest thing I ever laid my eyes upon. Up, up and above you by miles. Don't growl at me, you know you aren't normal. Secretly, I wouldn't have it any other way. It's actually starting to worry me that I am more outspoken in letters than when using my mouth, but I think I can get over it. You probably enjoy this out of character me. But as I was saying, she was odd. Not in the way she looked or dressed, but in her thoughts and interpretation of life. To be honest, she looked like a very respectable and well off women. She kept telling me to stop worrying about you, that if I died fulfilling this last wish of mine, that you would get over it. If it wasn't for the fact she had a nasty temper, I may just have walked out on her there and then, but she went on to say interesting things. I asked her how she could say such things. Why wasn't she more compassionate to you, and telling me to keep myself safe for your sake if not mine like everyone else. She scoffed at me; something I think is probably below someone of her stature, but fitting to her none the less. Yes Naruto, that was an insult to her. No need to get angry, I just thought you might not have clicked. Anyway, she said that if you really cared about me that you would get over it. It is the greatest act of love to forgive someone for leaving you, forgiving them for betraying you. I asked her if this is what she was like when her husband died. She laughed and said not for many years. It took her a long time to let go of her anger. I asked her she did it in the end. I will never forget the look on her face when she answered me Naruto. It was the saddest yet most content smile I have ever seen, and I hope to never see such a look on another's face again. She told me that she didn't forget anything; she just chose to remember all the happiness she felt with her husband rather than think things such as 'I wish he was here' or 'if he was still alive...'. As odd as she is, I don't think I will ever again meet a women quite as strong as her. Though I do not for a second feel like accepting the fact I might die, but I can only hope you are as strong as she. I speak to as honestly as I can when I say; I will come back to you. Even if I must fight every shinigami in the whole after life to get back to you, I will.

Just remember that.

-.-

A/N

Okay, so I am fully prepared to get any and all flames for this taking so long. I even understand that many people may have given up on this, but to those of you who stuck with me, you have my heart felt thanks. I do have my reasons, but I won't make excuses for myself.

So, anyway, back to the story. It was very nearly 3,000 words this time! OMG and L-O- F'ing-L! I'm so proud of myself.

When it comes to this story, and since I have had a lot of time to think about it, there is a lot I have decided to change in the up coming chapters. First off is that Kiba may not be paired up at all. I just feel like that is me trying to make it all too neat and tidy. I now have a very clear idea on how Sasuke will first come back. And when I am going to bring in Itachi.

I would really like some comments on how my writing was in this chapter. I'm not happy with it at all, and have had it written for quite a while. I was thinking about re-writing it, but I thought that I probably would never get around to it and that would just delay me posting it. If I get enough people saying so, I will indeed re-write it. Don't be afraid to tell me either, I really like constructive criticism. It is my best friend CX.

The next chapter should be up soon, if all goes to plan, so I'll see you then.

P.S

To any of you who feel that you desperately need to know why I have kept you waiting for so long (hahahah and lol), you can read the bottom of my profile. See ya XP

A/N