It has been the almighty time skip, the greatest tool in a lazy author's arsenal...

Chapter 4

By Turquoise-Kitsune and her alter-ego, Raven

- -7 years later - - May - -

The last standing Uchiha was having a very bad day. This morning he was greeted by the lovely sight of his wife, Sakura, who was off to go be checked yet again. That's right 7 years after his blonde ex-lovers, departure the Uchiha clan was still without an heir, thanks to one Sakura.

Though the couple went at it like bunnies, to everyone's disgust, morning, noon and night. But Sakura was so impossible to impregnate, that it was driving Sasuke up the wall.

Said Uchiha was in fact currently sitting on his most favourite beanie couch, drowning himself in the blackest coffee he could find, while hopping that in her blackest of hearts, Karma would be as kind as to grant him a child. Unfortunately for him, Karma was a bitch, and had no intention of being kind to him.

As to prove this point, the door burst open, and in came the pink banshee, otherwise known, as Sakura Uchiha, his wife.

"Sasuke-dantsuku! You won't believe it but-"

"You're not pregnant are you?"

"But I am!!"

You may be wondering how this was Karma's way of punishing him. But all will be revealed, not now.

"You are?!" Sasuke shouted,

"Hm, Now don't you think we should celebrate?" Sakura said in what I believe she thought a seductive voice, I can tell you it sounded about as arousing as a cat eating expired cream and rotten tuna, and leaving the excretions on your bed as an early birthday present, in other words, not arousing at all.

"What? No way! We need to get to the Hokage's office so I can file a divorce!" And so began the descent to insanity Sakura style.

"But-but you love me! We have been married for 7 years! Did it all mean nothing?!"

"Yup," Blunt, to the point and 100 accurate on Sasuke's behalf, "I only stayed with you for my dignity and a baby. Now you are having my baby so I don't have to bother with all this heir nonsense,"

Sakura gasped, as if something had impaled her heart, No it can't end like this! I won't let it!

"But Sasuke-dantsuku-"

"No more dantsuku, husband nonsense,"

"What about the baby? How will it cope knowing that's its father abandoned it,"

"The heck with the baby! There is only one thing I care about now!"

"And what's that?" Spat Sakura,

"Getting back my Naruto!"

Sakura laughed bitterly, "Always comes back to him doesn't it? You are pathetic; you were screwing others right under his nose, and when he runs away after finding out, you don't lift a finger to find him. You only want him now because there's no one left for you to screw, and in your opinion he was the ah what was it you said, "the best fuck I have had in this whore village", why exactly would he want you back?"

"Because he loves me and I realize that I love him to!"

"No you lust him, and how do you know he hasn't found another lover?"

The seed of doubt was planted, and Sakura turned on her heel and stomped up to the guest room to no doubt cry and binge eat from her secret stash of pastry's, that was most likely the reason to the loss of her not-so-shapely to begin with body.

"What? What are you talking about?" Sasuke wailed, "He loves me, he can't have found another!"

His anguished calls fell on deaf ears, as Sakura locked herself in the guest room and proceeded to gorge on whatever food was near. While Sasuke stood in the lounge of their mansion, desperately hoping that Karma did not have something up her sleeve. Unfortunately for him, Karma was having too much fun to stop now.

- - Hokage's office - -

Shizune sat hunched over her desk, scribbling furiously at the over flowing paper work. Unlike her Master she was very efficient at her work, and as horrifying as it sounded she actually enjoyed doing paper work.

Shizune paused briefly, dipping her pen in ink, before continuing her neat scribble, humming softly, until she was interrupted by a brisk tapping at the door.

"Enter!" Shizune was soon flooded by the warm hug of her master.

"Tsunade-sama!" both woman clung to each other sobbing softly, only to be interrupted by a cough.

"Jiraiya-sama! You are back too!" Shizune gushed

"Well, I could hardly let my wife travel alone, could I?" the old man said sheepishly.

Shizune's eyes widened for a moment before babbling out a congratulations.

Tsunade smiled at the sight of her excited apprentice,

"Tsunade-sama? Have you heard from Naruto yet?"

The older woman's smiled extended, "he will be returning in time for the cherry blossom festival, with his family,"

"Family?"

Jiraiya and Tsunade shared a mysterious look before Jiraiya replied, "Blondie went and got himself a husband and a couple on mini-me's"

Shizune giggled, "Mini-me's?"

Tsunade could only smile, she was home.

XxXxXx

Wow! I actually updated!! So um this is unbeta-ed too, so excuse all mistakes. I have to say you guys are aMaZiNg! I received so much support for this story and I am currently grinning like an idiot as I go read my reviews! Future Naruto and family will be revealed in the next chapter, as this one was for all those who wanted to see Sasuke. Yup, he is a self-absorbed man-whore who abandons kids.

There is this awesome surprise in the next chapter, that will prove to all fellow Sakura-haters I haven't gone soft on her.

And come one guys! I want some challenges! I love challenges!

And I love you guys too!